9. Alec

CHAPTER 9

Alec

"Well, I definitely want to hook up."

Alec's feet stop moving, the lightness in his chest dissipating. When he was a kid, Charlie bought him a balloon at the fair. He told him it might pop, but Alec hadn't cared; he'd loved that balloon. It had been blue. Alec's favorite color is blue. Blue like the sky on a warm summer day. Blue like the endless sea. Blue like Theo's eyes.

That balloon didn't pop. It stayed in Alec's room until the helium was gone and it shriveled up and collapsed on itself. Alec had tried to hide it under his pillow, but someone threw it away. He wishes someone would throw away his heart.

"Yeah, I'm sure," Theo continues, pitching his voice lower. Alec doesn't want to hear anymore, yet his feet drag him towards the end of the aisle anyway. Maybe this is what he needs—to have his heart popped in a way his balloon hadn't.

Part of him wonders who Theo is talking to, but the other part already knows. It's Jason. It has to be. Theo is too introverted and antisocial to have more than one friend and there's no way he'd go clubbing with anyone else.

"Yeah, sure. You can pick me up at eight. We can hit The Cherry."

Alec's frown deepens. The Cherry is the only queer club in Santa Leon and a well known hookup spot for Theo, which makes sense given what Theo just told Jason, yet it still makes bile rise up Alec's throat. This is why you can't be friends with people you're in love with. Because they go and do things they have every right to do, and it makes you want to lay down and cry.

"I told you I'm not with anyone, idiot."

Theo laughs and Alec's heart shrivels up and dies the way it should have a long time ago.

Giving himself an extra moment, Alec wills his breathing to calm down and schools his features into nonchalance while he waits for Theo to get off the phone. It's only once he's heard Theo say goodbye that Alec smooths his hands down his belly, fingering Theo's shirt once before forcing his feet to move. He is under no illusions about whose fault this is—his own. If Theo had any inkling of the kind of pain he was causing, he would probably do everything to stop it like last time. The problem is, the only way to end this pain is to not be around Theo, and years of that did nothing to dull his crush. Sure, there were months where Alec let himself try to move aside and forget, but all it would take was Jason talking about Theo or Theo coming over for a family dinner and it all came rushing back.

At this point Alec has accepted he's probably going to spend his entire life in love with someone who doesn't return those feelings, and he's fine with it. Mostly. Except for times when he's reminded Theo's out there hooking up. The idea of him fucking other people makes Alec feel like puking, but he knows it's not his business. He has no right to be this upset, which is why he puts a lid on those feelings.

The only way to make sure Theo doesn't run away from him again is to never let on how big his own feelings are. The one upside is Alec is great at faking shit, and has an entire six years under his belt pretending he's no longer in love with Theo. He can totally do this.

Resolved to hide his feelings until he dies, he turns the corner and halts at the end of the aisle when he catches sight of Theo talking to Rio.

"We've got to pick one. Alec is gonna be back soon. Which one do you like?"

Theo holds her out as if she might pick a collar off the display and the fucking balloon in Alec's chest inflates. He loves this stupid idiot so fucking much.

"I know I took a while in the bathroom, but I didn't realize it was long enough for you to learn to speak cat."

Theo startles, pulling Rio back against his chest. "You scared the shit out of me."

"I have that effect on people." Alec smirks, hating the way his own smile grows when Theo laughs. "Did you miss me?"

"Yes, Alec, I missed you terribly while you were gone for an entire five minutes. How did you know?"

"Aw, you timed my absence. How sweet. I get it, life is very boring without me, isn't it?"

"It's quieter."

"Like I said, boring." He waits to see if Theo will say anything else, but when he doesn't Alec moves to his side, letting his arm brush up against Theo's. "How about we change tactics? You're overthinking this."

"One, how do you know I'm overthinking it? And two, you literally told me it was important."

"One, I've met you, Theodore. Two, I was giving you shit."

"Oh." Theo's shoulders slump forward while Rio tries to force her way out of Theo's arms to get to Alec. "I think she likes you better."

"She has impeccable taste."

The laugh he hopes for never comes and it's clear Theo's doing his anxiety spiral thing. Alec pulls his bottom lip between his teeth while he thinks, unconsciously leaning his side against Theo. He holds his breath when he notices that Theo doesn't pull away, so neither does Alec.

"Remember that summer we went to Yosemite?"

"I do," Theo agrees. "That was what, ten years ago?"

"Eleven," Alec supplies. "We stopped at the gift shop on the way out after two weeks of camping and we were looking at souvenirs. Charlie and Andrew and Jason were all loading up on shirts and hats and shit. But do you remember what you bought?"

"Uh, not really," Theo says, rubbing a hand over the back of his neck.

"A postcard. Mom came and asked you if there was anything else you wanted and you told her it was all you needed, but there was this hat you kept looking at. It was brown with a mountain range on it and you tried it on when no one was looking. I saw you smile and then put it back. You never pick things for yourself."

Theo's cheeks have the faintest pink to them, the rise and fall of his chest slow. "Why the hell do you remember that, Alec?"

Because I've always seen you, even when you tried to hide. Because I know you. Because I love you.

"Pick which one you like. Don't worry about what I said or what I was looking at. Just choose the one that you like the best, okay?"

"Alec."

Alec's heart beats hard in his chest and Theo's arm is warm against his own. Rio licks his hand and Alec wordlessly counts to five before he speaks. "I know your favorite color is brown. They don't have brown, but they have tan."

"It is brown," Theo agrees, reaching out for one of the collars on the bottom row, a darkish tan one. It's simple, plain, and exactly what Alec would've expected him to pick. "This one is good."

"Good choice, Theodore. Now let's finish shopping."

Alec trudges up the front stairs to his apartment, pausing outside the front door. Someone put a welcome mat out while he was gone that says "go away" and it makes him laugh, some of his tension dissipating. Of course that same tension returns tenfold while he digs out his keys and thinks about the missed messages from their group chat and from Riley this morning about his disappearing act. He half expects the third degree the moment he steps inside, which he probably deserves for vanishing for ten hours without a note or a reply, but that doesn't mean he's looking forward to it.

Steeling himself for a telling off, he pushes open the front door. He's surprised by the relative quiet, aside from the blasting coming from the television. Hunter is sitting on their couch playing some video game where you shoot things. Alec can't remember the name despite Hunter telling him at least twice already. Alec's never been a fan of video games. Way too much sitting for someone with as much energy as him. Hunter, Logan and Riley all play them a lot though, so he might want to learn to at least understand what's happening just so he isn't lost.

He's barely got his key hung on the little key hook and his shoes on the shoe rack before Hunter looks up, eyes snapping from the tv to Alec's face.

"I know I'm gorgeous, but it's rude to stare."

To his surprise Hunter doesn't flip him off or laugh. Instead, he blushes, a reaction Alec has absolutely no bandwidth to try and examine.

"What the hell happened to your face?"

"Nothing," Alec says, crossing the room and flopping down onto the edge of the couch opposite Hunter. Now that he's far away from Theo, the fatigue of the day is catching up with him. He's sore in places he doesn't want to be, his lip is throbbing, and most of all, his chest aches. Glad as he is to not face a lecture, he kind of wishes Antonio or Riley were here.

Hunter lifts an eyebrow. "Doesn't look like nothing."

Were it anyone else he might be honest, but Alec still doesn't know Hunter that well and while he's definitely warming up to the guy, the last thing he wants to do is feel even more exposed than he already does. "Nah," Alec shrugs, closing his eyes and tipping his back on the couch, trying to come up with a distraction. "Where is everyone?"

"Riley came by to see why you were ignoring him and then he and Antonio went to the store to get cereal and milk."

A fresh wave of guilt rolls in. He shouldn't be ghosting his closest friends. He debates texting them but decides to wait until they get home. This isn't a conversation he wants to have over text and knowing his friends it's not a conversation they're going to let him avoid.

"Is Logan still at practice?"

"I think so," Hunter answers, unpausing the game. Despite the sound of things exploding, Alec doesn't bother opening his eyes. "Sports sound exhausting. You guys are nuts. You can't do jack shit because you've got practice or training or you're tired from one of those. I don't know how you do it."

Alec hums, not sure either. It's only been a week since he moved back onto campus, and he already feels like he's gonna crumble. He can't imagine adding a full schedule on top of all the practice, not to mention the games. There was a time where nothing had made Alec feel more alive than being on the field, but those days are fewer and farther between. He'd felt an inkling of it playing in Mexico, chasing the ball for fun and not because scouts or a coach was watching him. This semester isn't for fun. This semester has to be perfect. He needs to maintain his scholarship, keep his grades up and?—

"You're sighing a lot for someone who has nothing going on."

Alec exhales again, louder this time, grinning when Hunter slams a couch pillow into his head. "So what exactly are you playing again? Donkey Kong?"

"Are you fucking shitting me?" Hunter levels him with a look that could kill. "It's Call of Duty."

"My mistake." Alec laughs, already in a better mood. "Let me try."

"You'll tank my K/D ratio." Hunter scoots sideways, trying to keep the controller out of reach, but Alec launches himself forward and ends up half in Hunter's lap as he attempts to take the controller from him.

"Come on, let me try your little make believe thing."

"Call of Duty," Hunter corrects, using his stupidly long arms to lift the controller out of reach. It occurs to Alec that Hunter is actually really handsome with his blond hair and blue eyes. "Besides, I thought you didn't play video games."

I don't , Alec thinks, desperate as fuck for any distraction from his brain. "Teach me."

Hunter pauses, looking at Alec with a fairly intense level of eye contact. Alec can't imagine what he looks like with his bruised cheek and split lip, trying to steal his new roommate's controller. He doesn't play video games. He still barely knows Hunter. Maybe he's losing his mind.

"Is this about that guy that was here last week?"

"Why would you ask that? Did someone say something?"

"Is there something to say?" Hunter says. If the questions weren't being directed at Alec, he'd be far more impressed at Hunter's perception. As it is he feels squirmy, like he wants to run until his legs burn, or to bite something. He settles for tapping out a pattern on his leg.

"Who blabbed? Was it Riley? He's got a big fucking mouth. Or Antonio? He never shuts up."

"You never shut up," Hunter says.

Alec flips him off and Hunter laughs before retrieving the second controller and setting up player two.

"To answer your question, no one told me anything." He passes a controller. "I do have eyes, though."

"Don't say that," Alec groans, tipping himself sideways so he's half off the couch. "I'm subtle and no one knows anything."

"You're about as subtle as a stoplight."

"Fuck you," Alec grumbles, shoving his socked feet at Hunter, who merely laughs again. "I can be subtle. I am the king of subtle. I am—fuck, I'm not subtle."

"If it helps, I don't think he has any idea. He's pretty old, maybe it was past his bedtime."

"He's twenty-nine." Alec snorts, wondering what's happening to his life. He wasn't even gonna confess this to Riley and Antonio, and here he is all but spilling his guts to Hunter. "He's?—"

"Oblivious as fuck?"

Alec collapses, his hand hanging off the couch. "Yes, that."

Hunter nods. "Sounds brutal." Alec holds his breath, waiting for the sympathy Riley or Antonio might offer, or the twenty questions. To his surprise and relief, he gets neither. "Wanna shoot some shit?"

"Yes, I do," Alec says, twisting until he's back on the couch. He ends up far too close to Hunter, his side entirely smashed against him. "Sorry, I can move. Hang on."

"You're good," Hunter says, eyes on the tv as he leans against Alec.

The pressure is a relief and Alec tries not to overthink it. Were it one of his close friends, they'd know without being told how much Alec likes physical contact. They'd know what it means and everything it doesn't. Part of Alec wants to explain, but the rest of him is raw and exhausted, relieved that Hunter isn't prying. Alec's not even sure if Hunter is straight or queer, but he doesn't seem remotely bothered about another guy all up in his personal space, so Alec figures he's safe.

"You'll never be as good as me, but if you try really hard maybe you won't totally suck, King."

"Wow, you're such an inspirational teacher."

"You wanna learn or not?" Hunter grins.

"Alright, boss man, let's do this."

"Am I hallucinating?"

Alec squeezes his eyes shut tighter, willing the loud voice to go away.

"Did you drug him?" a second voice adds. Riley.

"Why the fuck would I do that?" Hunter asks, clearly unfamiliar with Riley's joking tone.

"He's sleeping. In the day," Antonio continues. Alec can't blame his incredulity. Alec barely sleeps at night and he never naps. "What happened? Why is his face all jacked up?"

"No one did anything to me, you loud fuckers," Alec grumbles, stretching out his legs. He opens his eyes, blinking when he finds himself in Hunter's lap. "Hey."

"Hey," Hunter grins.

"Is anyone going to tell us what's going on?" Riley asks.

Alec turns to see Riley and Antonio staring at him and Alec rolls himself off the couch and onto all fours. He tries to make his way from the room, but Riley throws himself down and grabs his ankles. The asshole is strong and despite Alec's attempts to wiggle free, he can't.

"What the fuck, Alec?"

Alec can't blame Antonio. He's being kind of intense even for him, but Alec isn't prepared to face reality. "I was just gonna, uh?—"

"Run away," Antonio finishes.

Alec sighs, collapsing on the floor. The carpet smells stale and it's rough against his sore cheek. When Riley lets go of his legs, Alec doesn't move, remaining on the ground with his arms and legs spread out like a starfish.

"We need to talk."

"No, thank you," Alec mumbles into the carpet.

"I'm going to head out," Hunter says, though whether he's trying to escape from the awkwardness or give them space, it's impossible to tell.

Antonio and Riley wait until Hunter leaves before they join him on the floor. Alec closes his eyes tighter, unable to look at them. Of all the people in the world, they're the two he can't lie to.

"We were worried this morning. It's not like you to disappear for so long, and then you ghosted us both, which you never do."

The guilt is more than Alec can bear and he lifts his face, resting his chin on his folded arms. Leave it to Antonio to go there. He never minces words, which is probably why he and Alec are so close. It's just that he's not in the mood to have that directed at him.

"M'sorry."

"What the fuck happened?" Riley asks. "Where were you?"

"Who says something happened?" Alec says.

"Your face." Antonio reaches out, his hands warm on Alec's cheek as he turns it. "Did someone hurt you?"

"Say the word and I'll fuck them up." Riley tells him.

Alec laughs, wishing he hadn't when it makes his lip hurt. "You're like a fucking golden retriever Riley, you wouldn't hurt a fly."

Riley clutches his hands to his chest. "I don't know if I should say thank you or fuck you."

"He's not wrong," Antonio tells Riley, laughing. The sight of them getting along is a balm to Alec, who'd toed the line of mixing friendship when he'd gotten closer to Riley. He'd been afraid Antonio would feel like he was being replaced, which he had, but things seem to have improved. Alec kind of wants to tease them, but also doesn't want to risk it.

"How's Elsa?"

Antonio's smile fades. "Don't change the subject, asshole."

"He called her while we were at the store. I don't speak Spanish, but there were a lot of disgustingly-in-love tones happening."

Antonio flips Riley off. "At least I have a girlfriend. Wait, fiance. Damn, that sounds good."

"I don't think I want to get married," Riley admits, stretching his long legs out. Alec takes that as an opportunity to flop over them, using Riley's thigh as a pillow. It's a lot more comfortable than his arms.

"Ever?" Alec asks.

"Nah, too much work. My parents put me off it."

"Aren't your parents still married?" Antonio asks.

"Exactly," Riley groans. "All that bitching and moaning and they're never happy. Don't get me wrong, they're wonderful parents, mostly. But they're fucking miserable together, and wouldn't get divorced for the kids. Like we all wanna hear all that fighting. It just sounds like too much work. Sorry, that's depressing, you're getting married soon. Marriage is, uh, fantastic."

Antonio shrugs, unbothered.

"I wanna get married," Alec admits. "One day. Not like right now, but in a few years. It seems nice to share that with someone."

"Of course you do, you big romantic." Antonio ruffles his hair. "I bet you'll sob like a baby walking down the aisle."

"Maybe my husband will sob when he looks at me being all sexy and shit."

Riley laughs. "Cocky fucker."

Alec grins, rolling onto his back to look up at Riley. "I have a mirror. I know what I look like."

"How the fuck does your ego fit in this room?" Antonio says.

Alec's smile fades. "I think I fucked up."

"When you say fucked up, do you mean like need a lawyer fucked up, or in trouble with coach fucked up, or?—"

"I spent all day with Theo fucked up," Alec says, staring at a stain on the ceiling. A familiar weight settles on his stomach as Antonio uses him like a pillow while Riley's big hand rests at his head. Neither of them are as tactile as Alec, but they know him well, maybe even better than he ever realized, and offer the kind of comfort he isn't brave enough to ask for right now. "I don't wanna be in love anymore."

"So are you gonna stop seeing him?" Riley asks.

There's a tightness in his chest. He knows what he should do, and yet he can't. "No."

"Fuck." Antonio whistles.

"Fuck," Riley echoes.

"Big fuck," Alec agrees. He counts the beats of his own heart, glad Theo has no idea each of them beat for him. "Maybe I can get some distance. I won't stop seeing him, but I'll be cool and aloof. I'll make him come to me."

"Now we're talking," Riley says. "Make him beg."

"That's not?—"

"Make him see how great you are," Antonio agrees. "Not that we're gonna share you. You've already got two best friends."

"I think that's the first time you've admitted we're all besties." Alec grins. "I feel like I should make us friendship bracelets."

"No, you're fucking not." Antonio laughs.

"Bradley makes friendship bracelets. He handed them out on pledge night. Had everyone's names and shit, too."

"Is Bradley the guy who always wears those pink polo shirts and the shell necklace?"

"That's him. Strange dude, but cool. Dudes can totally wear friendship bracelets."

"Now I kind of want one," Antonio admits, holding his arm up and twisting his wrist. "But I want red. Do they make lion beads? I want a lion bead."

"I want hot pink," Riley says. "Oh, and maybe some flowers. My little sisters would love that."

"Bossy besties." Alec snorts, fully determined to give them exactly what they want. "I want blue."

"Of course you do," Riley says. "Predictable fucker. Blue, blue, blue. Always blue."

He isn't wrong. Alec's favorite color has been blue since he was seven. What no one knows is that it's because of Theo. At the time Alec didn't fully understand what it meant to be gay, but when he looked at Theo's eyes, so bright and kind and as deep blue as the sea, he began to prefer it to all others.

"Are we gonna have a sleepover now too? Do each other's hair?"

"If you're angling to stay the night here and avoid your siblings, the answer is yes," Alec tells Riley, earning him a whoop.

Riley and Antonio set off on a tangent about needing to go back to Target to get candy for their sleepover and Alec breathes a little easier. He loves his friends and he loves Theo. It's not the same, but he can totally do this. He can have another friend and not make it weird. He knows he can. He just needs to give himself a little buffer to get his head on straight.

Alec makes it four days before he ends up on Theo's front porch unannounced. He could've called or texted first, but that would've involved planning and Alec is more of a ‘just run into things without thinking' kind of guy. Especially since any prior notice would have also involved the opportunity for Theo to say no, and Alec's tolerance for rejection is at zero.

The coach has been running them ragged for preseason training, Hunter and Logan are up half the night playing video games since classes don't officially start until Monday, and his insomnia is at an all-time high. Maybe, probably, he should talk to someone about it, but just because he has problems sleeping doesn't mean he needs to tell anyone. He's showing up for practice, pulling his weight, and yeah, he's probably gonna snap once a full class schedule is added on top of that along with their games, but Alec's good under pressure.

Or he used to be. This year is different, or maybe Alec is different. Ever since he got back from Mexico, it's like something in his brain won't switch back. He used to be able to hyperfocus on soccer and not give a shit when his teammates talked about hooking up. He could focus on the game and not care that it took every ounce of energy he possessed to play at his level, leaving him with nothing for himself. He used to be able to pretend this life was everything he wanted.

Pretending is getting harder and harder.

"Alec?"

Theo's standing in the doorway, looking confused and cozy. He's got another sweater on, but this is clearly a house-only sweater, misshapen and worn thin. There's a hole at his collar and at the elbow, but the yarn looks as soft and comfortable as the brown pajama pants he's got on.

"Why are you in pajamas?"

"Uh, because it's eight-thirty."

"Eight isn't late," Alec says.

"I'm an old man, Alec." Theo pushes his hair out of his eyes, the corners of his eyes crinkling in amusement. He's so stupidly handsome when he's happy. Well, he's always handsome, but there's something about the way his strong, masculine features soften when he's relaxed and happy that does things to Alec.

"I forgot. You got your AARP membership and telenovelas on standby? Should I get you a hot water bottle?"

"I don't watch telenovelas. That's you." Theo arches an eyebrow knowingly, and yeah, maybe he'd walked in on Alec crying over them once when he was eleven, the year Theo lived with them. In Alec's defense, he'd had a really long day at school only to come home and find out his favorite character had died. Granted she'd come back a few weeks later with amnesia, but baby Alec hadn't known how it would turn out. Where his brothers would've teased him mercilessly, Theo had brought him a folded napkin with two Oreos and ruffled his hair before closing the door.

"Look, abuelita turned me on to them and there's nothing better after a long day like someone else's drama." Alec moves under Theo's arm, halfway inside when he asks, "Mind if I come in?"

"You know you're always welcome here."

It's clear Theo wasn't expecting company. There's Chinese takeaway containers on his coffee table, the lights are dimmed, and the coffee table is littered with cups—a coffee mug, a Hydroflask with fading National Parks stickers and a mostly empty boba. The television is paused on a nature documentary and there's a blanket draped over the couch, tousled haphazardly like he threw it off his lap. All of it screams "Theo" in the most familiar way possible.

"Do you mean that?" Alec asks. "Sometimes you say shit just to be nice. You can hurt my feelings if it's not true."

"I don't wanna hurt your feelings, Alec."

Alec shrugs. "I'd rather have hurt feelings than be lied to."

"I'm not lying, I?—"

Rio chooses this exact moment to make herself known, meowing loudly for attention.

"She was sleeping. She must have Alec radar."

"To be fair, my presence is pretty exciting. Isn't it, baby girl?" He squats down, picking her up. Impossibly, she seems bigger than a few days ago and Alec vows to come over more. For Rio. That's all. No other reason. "Look at you, little angel. Did you miss me?"

"Angel." Theo snorts. "A menace is what she is. She's hyperactive, cries for attention constantly, acts like I starve her to death if I go one minute past mealtime, and is clingy as all get out. She even tries to sit in my pants when I'm in the bathroom. She's a total pain in the ass."

The words make Alec's chest tighten unexpectedly. He'd meant everything he said about the placement being temporary. Cats weren't for everyone. He'd really hoped Theo would warm up to her, though. So far no one else he knew was looking for a kitten and he hated the idea of dropping her at an already overcrowded shelter.

"I'll look harder for a new placement."

"Slow your roll, whipper snapper." Theo's smile is playful and while Alec has seen this side of him, it's been a long time since it was directed at him. "I didn't say anything about that. I like her."

"You said she's a pain in the ass."

"She is," Theo agrees, reaching out to give her a scratch between the ears. She lets out a contented purr, the faintest hint of pink coloring Theo's cheekbones. "Maybe I like feisty pains in the ass."

"Are you referring to the kitten or me?" Alec asks, fighting off the biggest smile. His lip has mostly healed, giving only the faintest twinge of pain as his lips spread wide.

"The kitten, you, Jason…take your pick. I'm a magnet for needy people."

"Must be your delightful personality." Alec flips him off just to be sure he knows Alec is being sarcastic, in case his tone wasn't a dead giveaway.

Theo's laugh is full-bellied and amused, and Alec can't be bothered with anything as insignificant as being offended when the teasing has made Theo so obviously happy.

"Not that you're not welcome here, because we've now established you are. But what are you doing here and more importantly, how did you get here? I didn't hear a car. Did you run?"

"It's not that far." Alec shrugs.

"You and I have different definitions of not far. Nine miles, Alec. I don't run nine miles in a week."

"You don't run at all," Alec points out.

"I don't," Theo agrees, patting his tummy. "I don't look like I did in high school anymore."

Football had made Jason and Theo both all muscle, but age has both softened him out and bulked him up. His waist is still trim, but he's no longer in pursuit of a six-pack. He's both strong and soft, and Alec loves the way Theo's body looks lived-in.

Alec knows people like his body. Fuck knows they tell him enough, as if all that matters about him are the sharp lines of his Adonis belt or his muscular thighs. Alec might have an athletic physique, but to him there is nothing more attractive than Theo's body—big and strong and a little soft in all the right places.

"No need to fish for compliments, Theodore."

Theo balks. "I wasn't."

"Lies," Alec says with an exaggerated sigh. He knows Theo wasn't, because Theo is the least conceited person Alec has ever met with absolutely no concept of how gorgeous he is and unlike Alec, he is borderline allergic to too much attention. Alec can't relate in the least. He's pretty sure if he goes more than twenty-four hours without someone complimenting him, he starts to wither like a plant deprived of the sun.

"I'm not lying," Theo continues with the kind of earnestness only he can manage.

"You just want to hear how handsome you are, which is fair. You are handsome. Theo, you are the most handsome sweater-wearing man I've ever seen. Happy?"

He waits for Theo to splutter or laugh, but he does neither. "You think I'm handsome?"

Alec gapes. "Is that a serious question?"

"Uh, yes?"

Alec has tried very hard to keep his flirtatious personality in check with Theo, to not make him uncomfortable by toeing too close to the line of attraction he still holds, but this is too much. He knows Theo isn't exactly insecure, he's just oblivious about himself and the effect he has on people. Alec still remembers Theo in high school, having no idea the way people would trip over themselves when he was around. He's pretty sure Theo thought they were clamoring for Jason's attention and while some of them were, people wanted Theo's, too. But Theo never sees these things. It's like he's got on blinders and can't see when people like him.

Apparently it's going to be up to Alec to let him know he's the sexiest goddamn man to ever walk this earth. Lowering Rio to the floor, he stalks closer to Theo, grabbing his face between both hands while trying not to laugh at the look in Theo's eyes. It's clear he has no idea what to make of Alec, which is great. Maybe then he'll be too confused and surprised to comprehend how painfully true Alec's next words are.

"Theodore James, you are like a sexy librarian fantasy come to life. Your quiet confidence oozes sex appeal, and everywhere we go, people look at your ass because it's as thick as the rest of you." Theo's entire face is red as a tomato but Alec can't stop. He squeezes Theo's cheeks for good measure. "You are one sexy fuck of a man. You should own it."

When he's done, he gives Theo's stomach a playful pat and then turns around. "Do you have any Coke? I'm fucking thirsty." With that he walks out of the room, not waiting to see if Theo will follow.

Alec is totally nailing this friendship thing.