20. Micah

20

Micah

I t'd been days since I'd seen Nox. He'd walked out of that hotel room, and I'd known it was goodbye.

That hadn't stopped me reaching out to him though. The knowledge that he hadn't returned to his home was burned into my mind, nagging at me whenever I closed my eyes. The bond didn't give me any relief either. It was a constant pull in my chest, begging me to seek him out. To try and reason with him that we could make it. That maybe we could persuade the higher-ups to take a chance on us. A mating bond was supposed to be sacred, so that had to count for something…

Right?

If I could have made myself believe that, maybe we could've given it a try. But there was no way. You just had to look at Ferry to know that. He'd been separated from his mate for over four thousand years. He'd been imprisoned in Hell to transport souls over the river Styx while his mate lived out many lifetimes without him.

If Ferry, one of the original archs, could be punished in this way, there was no way they'd make an exception for me.

I shouldn't have messaged Nox. Call it a moment of weakness. Insanity. Delusion. Whatever it was, it wasn't the right thing to do.

Even if it felt like it. I'd briefly tasted happiness only to have it taken away again. They said forbidden fruit was the most delicious. That it would tempt you in ways you'd never been tempted before.

They didn't tell you how much it hurt to have it out of your reach after sampling it.

More than ever, I regretted not keeping my guard up. Not with my emotions, but being aware of where Nox's hands were. If he hadn't found my scars, maybe we'd still be in that hotel room, pretending we weren't doomed, escaping reality with each other for as long as we could. Maybe we could've used that time to come up with a solution. A plan that would allow us to be together.

Instead, it'd been a harsh reminder of what we were up against. What we were both risking by doing this.

If it had just been my body on the line, my life, maybe I would've pushed harder. But it wasn't just me, it was my entire unit. I couldn't risk them, not even for my own happiness. I might've been selfish in the past, but that was where I drew the line.

It was alarming to realise that wasn't what I was most scared of though. No, that fear was reserved for Nox. What they would do to him to punish me.

Nothing would break me faster than seeing Nox in pain.

I'd been stupid to reach out. On reflection, it was a good thing Nox had put me in my place. He was right. It was for the best.

That didn't mean I'd stopped thinking about him though. It also hadn't stopped me reaching for my phone every thirty seconds. About an hour ago, Rami had got annoyed and confiscated it so we could focus on the paperwork that had been dumped on us by upstairs. With the amount we'd been given, I'd had to rope in both him and Grace to help me and Benji out.

Benji had offered me one of his fidget toys, but I'd declined with a tight smile. It wasn't that I needed something to do with my hands.

I needed something to stop me losing my senses and tracking down my demon.

Not my demon.

To be honest, I was amazed I hadn't been summoned upstairs after our involvement in the crane disaster. We'd chosen to alter the course of fate, knowing there'd likely be consequences. Well, consequences for me, anyway.

But there'd been nothing aside from an uptick in paperwork. Either they didn't know about what the Seraphim had done, or thought this was a fitting punishment.

I wouldn't lie, it was working. Not enough to stop me making the same decision again, but enough to be grumpy about my hand cramping.

We were working our way through a very tedious report about a rise in shifter activity on the Scottish border when Ez burst through the door. As soon as I saw his pale face, I knew something was wrong. He was wearing an expression I'd only seen on him a handful of times before.

Fear.

All my earlier thoughts about Heaven punishing the unit came screaming back to me. Did they know about the humans we'd helped? About the rules we'd broken?

"What's wrong?" Grace said, dropping her pen. "Ez?"

Ezekiel didn't acknowledge Grace. It was almost like he hadn't heard her. His attention was fixed on me as he strode across the room.

I got to my feet as he approached, foreboding spreading through my gut. "What is it?"

Ez tried to speak. It took him three attempts before the words would come out. "It's Emilio."

I flinched automatically at the name of my tormentor. I tried to hide it, but from the puzzled stare Benji gave me, I failed. "What about him?"

"He's dead," Ez said bluntly. The sense of foreboding descended rapidly into a yawning pit of doom. "Executed. His body has been displayed at one of the portals to Heaven."

"Displayed?"

Ez inclined his head. "He was hung by his wrists from two trees."

There was a faint ringing in my ears. No no no. It had to be a coincidence. Nox wouldn't have been so stupid…

"Tell me everything."

Ez cleared his throat. "He was tortured before he was killed."

"How can you tell?" Benji asked curiously. "His wounds would've healed, right?"

That was true. Even if an arch was executed, the final drops of power would heal their body, leaving them immaculate in death.

Unless someone used a cursed ointment.

The ringing turned into a roar as Ezekiel confirmed my worst fears. This wasn't about the unit being punished. It was a fate far more terrifying. "It looks like some kind of cursed ointment was used on him. Something that stopped his wounds healing."

I dropped into my chair, the heels of my hands on my forehead. My fingers pulling at my hair. No. It's a coincidence. It has to be.

"What kind of wounds? How was he tortured?"

This time, Ez answered Grace. "According to Noah, he was whipped. One of his former brethren reached out with the news. He figured we, as the Seraphim, ought to know about it because of the message."

My head flew up. "What message?"

Ez's eyes shuttered. "There was a message carved into Emilio's chest."

I swallowed, nodding for Ez to continue.

"You're not above judgement. Treat your archs better or reap the consequences."

The room tilted. I reached out, steadying myself on the table. My voice, when I spoke, sounded like I was hearing it through a tunnel. "Is that all?"

Benji slowly rose to his feet as Ez shook his head. "No. A demon was seen leaving the scene. He was described as having short dark hair, tattoos, and several piercings, including a lip ring."

I fell to my knees.

How the fuck could Nox have been so reckless?

"Micah," Benji said slowly. "Why would Nox do this?"

I couldn't answer him. Numbness was taking over as the full horror of what this would mean washed over me.

Nox had been seen. They'd already be hunting him.

I had to find him before they did.

Benji was apparently done waiting for an answer. Grabbing the neckline of my shirt, he neatly tore it in two. It was so like what Nox had done that the pain ripping through me was doubled.

Benji's sharp indrawn breath had both Ezekiel and Grace rushing to join him behind me, Rami a few steps behind.

I didn't move to stop them. I didn't have it in me. What was the point? Emilio was dead now.

And soon Nox would be too.

The pull in my chest was thumping, like it was trying to physically tear open my rib cage so it could get to Nox.

Or maybe that was just the feeling of my heart breaking.

I was distantly aware of raised voices. The door slamming open. More angels appearing. My brethren gently touching the scars on my back. The noise increasing as they battled to be heard.

I ignored them all. None of it mattered.

Suddenly, nothing mattered.

A hand grabbed my chin roughly, forcing me to look up.

I blinked up at the face scowling down at me. Red hair fell over hard eyes. Ezekiel.

His mouth was moving, but I couldn't make out the words. He tried again before letting go of me helplessly, throwing his hands in the air.

Now it was solemn lilac eyes meeting mine. Nate.

He shook my shoulders. He tried to tell me something.

But just like with Ezekiel, I couldn't hear him.

It was like I was no longer here. My body was, but my mind wasn't. My heart wasn't. My soul wasn't.

They were all with Nox, wondering how many minutes I had left with him in the world.

Get up, I screamed at myself. Go and save him.

Another pair of lilac eyes joined Nate's. The two argued about something. Theo was gesturing at me while Nate stubbornly shook his head. His twin sighed .

That was all the warning I got before Theo's fist connected with my jaw.

My lungs filled, a painful burning. Everything came screaming back into focus.

"You okay, boss?" Nate asked anxiously.

Theo was shaking out his hand with a scowl. "If he needs another punch then someone else can do it. Fucker's jaw is like granite."

Rami slapped him around the back of his head. "He didn't ask you to hit him, dickhead."

"I'm okay," I said, before a fight could break out. My mind was racing now, calculating how fast I could track Nox. Where I might be able to hide him. "I need to?—"

I never managed to finish the sentence. Lightning cracked through the study, making us all flinch and throw up our shields. It hit the floor harmlessly before fading away.

In its wake stood an angel. Like all of us, he was beautiful. Unlike us, his job wasn't that of soldier.

But of messenger.

"Micah, leader of the Seraphim," he said ominously. "Your presence is required upstairs. Immediately."

I exchanged a panicked look with Ezekiel. He and Benji were the only ones who knew Nox was my fated mate. But I suspected all of the Seraphim now knew that he'd killed Emilio.

For me.

The higher-ups had to suspect he was connected to me somehow. Why else would they be sending for me?

They had to know. I was going to answer for Nox's crimes the same way I did for everyone else. Strangely, I didn't mind. If anything, I felt an enormous rush of relief. Either my punishment would absolve Nox, or we'd both leave this universe together.

It was better than the alternative. Better than having to exist in a world that no longer had Nox in it. It was funny—I'd been alive so long that I'd somehow lost count of the years, but these past few weeks with Nox…I remembered every second. They'd been imprinted on my soul, making him a part of me I knew I couldn't live without.

The messenger reached out for my hand. I took it mutely, knowing better than to fight this. If I refused to go with him, they'd send a legion after me.

I should know. We were the legion who were often sent to recover angels who'd committed misdeeds then refused to answer for their crimes.

The Seraphim wouldn't be sent to recover me, but another unit would. My unit might not fight for me, not wanting to go against Heaven's rules, but I didn't want to put them in that position.

If I was going down, I wasn't taking any of them with me.

Ez took a step forward like he was going to say something. Before he could, I threw my free arm around his neck, drawing him close to me.

"Keep them safe," I whispered in his ear, too low for any of the others to hear. "Protect the unit, Ez."

He had just enough time to nod before I was pulled away from him. Light filled the room, ripping me from the home I shared with my brethren.

And landing me in the centre of Heaven's grandest courtroom.

T echnically, we weren't in Heaven at all. As the courts were used to prosecute supes from all walks of life, they existed in purgatory. It was a bland land that occupied the space between Heaven and Earth. Humans sometimes glimpsed it while hovering in between life and death. The light they spoke of wasn't actually Heaven, but purgatory. A holding place.

And a place of judgement.

Seven faces stared down at me from the dais. Humans believed it was God herself who decided on their punishments, but the reality was that she had more important things to concern herself with than misbehaving supes and humans.

Or murderous demons.

She would only become involved in the most dire of circumstances. It'd take Armageddon being threatened for her to step in.

That wasn't the case today.

I nodded sharply at the judges, just as I always did. Their faces gave nothing away. The seat by the door, the one Emilio usually occupied as resident enforcer, was noticeably empty.

Play dumb . My inner voice had taken on Nox's husky timbre. Pretend you don't know what's going on. Get out of this.

It wasn't a bad idea. Not that I wanted to escape punishment—if Nox was being executed, then so was I, but maybe if I played this right…

Maybe I could escape long enough to find Nox. To fight by his side.

To die at his side.

"Good evening," I said mildly, nodding in the direction of Emilio's empty chair. "Are we waiting for Emilio before we begin? I have to say, I'm not sure what I've done that can be considered a transgression this time."

The two angels on the far left exchanged a look, but I kept my attention fixed on Gloria. Her decision was the one that mattered.

Beauty seemed to shine from her, but I knew better than most how skin deep that beauty was. Beneath her pleasant exterior lay a cunning, manipulative and ruthless mind. "No transgression today, Micah. We're sending you on a mission."

"Of course. I live to serve you." My smile was as false as the one Gloria wore. They wanted to send me on a mission now ?

It's okay. This is good. Agree to whatever they tell you, then leave. Find Nox. Escape. Hide.

Something about this wasn't right though. Why had they summoned me to the courts to give me a mission? We were technologically advanced enough that such orders were usually emailed over a private server.

"I am confused, though," I said carefully. It hadn't escaped my notice that Gloria hadn't responded to my question about Emilio. "Is there a reason why I've been summoned to hear this mission?"

One of Gloria's perfectly manicured brows raised. "Are you questioning our methods?"

"Of course not," I lied. "I was just curious, that's all."

"Curiosity is the path to sin," the angel to Gloria's right intoned. Randall had always been the most pious of the seven judges. "You should know better, Micah."

Usually, I took their reprimands meekly, but not today. Today I didn't have contrition running in my veins. Nor obedience, meekness, or regret.

There was nothing but fear and rage. Together they equalled a desperation that overtook everything else, even the angel I'd always been.

Nothing else mattered to me now except finding Nox.

"Should I?" I responded, my brows raising. "Surely if I'm not curious about anything, then how can I know any better? We learn through action, not words. Isn't that what we're taught?"

Randall turned a delightful shade of purple. Before he could explode, Gloria raised a hand to silence him. The smile she gave me dripped innocence.

Alarm bells started to ring in the back of my mind.

"You're so interesting today," Gloria said, leaning her chin on her hand. "In fact, you've been rather… interesting over the past few weeks. It's exactly why you've been selected for this mission."

"I'm not sure what you're hinting at."

"I'm sure you're not." Gloria smirked. "But regardless, you have been specifically chosen for this mission, Micah. It'll be the highest honour of your career. The loyalty you'll show today will set a new standard for generations to come."

The alarm bells were screaming now, warning me to retreat. "And this mission is?"

"It's quite simple, Micah. A few hours ago, Emilio was brutally tortured and slaughtered. A demon by the name of Nox was spotted leaving the scene. Your mission is to track him down and execute him. "

I wasn't sure what expression was on my face, but whatever it was, it had Gloria's satisfied smirk deepening. "Is there an issue with our orders, Micah? A reason why you can't do this? I can't see why not. It's well within your capabilities. You've carried out missions like this a thousand times before. It's the perfect way for you to honour Heaven by demonstrating your continued loyalty."

It was then that I realised exactly what this was. A trap.

Somehow, they knew who Nox was to me. What we were to each other. They wanted me to admit it, to argue that I couldn't murder the man who was my fated mate.

I'd strayed too far from the path they'd set me on long ago. I'd betrayed my nature by falling in love with a demon.

Now, they wanted to punish me for that.

Nox's words from the day of the disaster echoed in my mind. " Wake up, Micah. Stop doing what you're told to, and do the right thing. The thing I know you want to do. "

My decision was made. My fate was sealed. I think it had been for a long time now.

I smiled at Gloria pleasantly. "There's no problem at all. It'll be my honour."