Chapter 10

CHAPTER 10

MATTHEW

“ E mmie! Let’s go or we’ll be late,” I yell up the stairs before I head back into the downstairs bathroom.

Standing in front of a mirror, I straighten my tie again. It’s been a week since Jessica arrived, and today is Uncle Jimmy’s funeral. There’s a short graveside service planned, but the main service is being held at Stocks and Stables, Uncle Jimmy’s favorite bar. I’ve no doubt the place will be packed with everyone in town wanting to come out and celebrate his life.

I’ve hardly seen Jessica. She’s remained relatively hidden from me all week. Aside from her first morning here, we haven’t seen her at breakfast. I’m off to work before she comes out of her room, and she stays out past dinner time. Ryan joins Emmie and I most nights, but he said she preferred to eat in town. I think she just wants to avoid any more contact with me.

When I asked Ryan where she’s been going all day, he said when they weren’t making funeral arrangements she was working out of Sweet Cakes. I don’t know why she doesn’t just work here all day. If her goal is to avoid me, she doesn’t have to worry. I’m at work. She can have the house to herself.

I’d tell her as much if she’d stick around long enough for me to talk.

“I’m ready, Daddy.” Emmie runs down the stairs and right into the backs of my legs .

I reach around and scoop her into my arms. “Let me get a good look at you.” I wrinkle my nose and pretend to give her a critical eye. “How about I fix that ponytail you’ve made? Run back upstairs and get your brush.”

I smile after my daughter. The things I never thought I’d do. But somehow over the past few years I’ve become the master hair braider and ponytail maker. The first time I tried to brush Emmie’s hair was a complete disaster. First, I was too gentle and none of the knots and tangles would come out. Next, I was too rough and pulled her hair too hard and made her cry. When my sister, Leann, came over and handed me a bottle of detangler after hearing me breakdown one night at dinner, I rejoiced. That one little hair brushing product is a lifesaver.

After that, I decided if I was going to rock at being a single dad, I needed to learn a lot more than just how to brush Emmie’s hair. I needed to know how to fix it, too. YouTube quickly became my best friend and Emmie ended up with the best hair in town. After learning a few quick tips and tricks, it turns out hair braiding isn’t all that difficult. But ponytails are definitely way faster.

I’m waiting on the couch when she runs back down and hands me her brush. “Here. Sit down in front of me.”

I brush out a few remaining tangles and quickly get it pulled into a neat ponytail. “Do you want to wear one of your bows?”

“Not today.”

“You sure? You love your bows.”

She nods and turns to face me with a serious expression. “My bows are too happy for today. I don’t want to upset Jessica.”

I smile and kiss her cheek. How did I get so lucky to have such a great kid? “You’re awesome, kiddo. I’m sure Jess will appreciate your consideration.”

She looks down at her hands and fiddles with the ribbon around her waist. She even insisted on wearing a black dress even though I tried to put her in one of her favorite pink ones.

“What’s the matter, sweetheart?”

She shifts her eyes to mine. All I see is sadness and concern. “Is Jessica mad at us? ”

“Oh, Emmie.” I pull her into my arms and give her a big hug. “Why would you think that?”

She shrugs. “She hasn’t been here since that first day. I thought she liked me and would ride with me.”

“I know for certain that she’s not mad at you. She’s just been busy preparing for today. Maybe she’ll have time once we get through this day. Okay?”

Emmie nods, but she doesn’t look convinced. “Why does Ryan have time for us then? Isn’t he also helping with today?”

Damn . This kid is way too observant. Ryan and I had been careful with our conversations and made sure we never said anything about Jessica or the house until Emmie was in bed. I guess that wasn’t enough.

“That has nothing to do with it. As the oldest, Jessica has taken on most of the responsibility. Plus, Jessica and Ryan are grieving differently. Ryan wants to be around others right now, but Jessica needs some time to herself.”

She seems to be contemplating my last words and for a moment I think she’s going to object to my explanation. But she shrugs and hugs me. “It’s really sad losing people you love. I bet you were really sad when Mommy died.”

I stiffen at the mention of her mom. I was sad when Emily died, but not for the right reasons. I was sad my child lost her mother. I was sad something bad happened to Emily. She didn’t deserve to die or miss out on raising her child any more than Emmie deserved to miss out on life without a mom. I loved Emily in my own way, and I mourned her death, but I was never in love with her. I’ve only ever been in love with one person, and that person can’t even be in the same room with me right now. “I was sad. But I was mostly sad that you’d never get to meet your mommy. I never wanted that for you.”

“I know, Daddy. But I’m okay. I’ve got you.”

“Yes, you do, kiddo.” I kiss the top of her head and stand with her still in my arms. “You ready? I think we’re officially late.”

I grab my keys off the hook by the door and head out to my truck. I may not get the chance to talk to Jessica today, but at least she won’t be able to hide from me. If all I get is the chance to look at her, I’ll take it. But I’m hoping for a lot more.

The graveside service was short and to the point, but more people showed up than I think Jessica or Ryan expected. Several people went straight to Stocks and Stables to help prepare the final details for the main service, but most of the town paid their respects graveside.

Jessica cried almost the entire time. It killed me to not be the one comforting her. My arms ached to hold her close—to tell her everything would be okay. But I’m not sure everything will be okay after this.

So much of my life is balancing on the edge of a cliff and dangerously close to tipping over. One wrong move, and it’ll all come crashing down into a pile of rubbish.

I still have no clue what she plans to do about the house. Ryan doesn’t either. He said she refuses to talk about it anytime he brings it up. Because of that, I should be more concerned about losing my home and my business, but all I can think about is pulling her into my arms and making her feel better.

But she doesn’t want my comfort. Even if she did, she wouldn’t accept it.

I’m the last of my family to arrive at Stocks and Stables. Momma was one of the ones to stay behind to finish setting everything up. Adam and Camille are standing with Momma. I don’t see Joseph or Leann, but I saw them pull in before me.

Emmie let’s go of my hand and runs across the room. “Uncle Adam!” she yells so loud most the eyes turn to look at what’s going on. That kid loves him so much that sometimes I think she likes him more than she likes me. I get it. Adam is great with kids. It’s a shame he never got to have kids of his own.

“Hey, munchkin.” He picks her up and gives her a tight hug.

I walk up behind him and give him a pat on the back before I reach over and give Camille a hug. It’s only been a couple of weeks since Adam and Camille made their relationship official, and I couldn’t be happier for my big brother. If anyone deserves happiness, it’s him .

“It’s good to see you again, Cami. Is the house remodel complete now?” I ask.

Camille moved to Watercress Falls several months ago and hired my brother to remodel the old chalet she bought. She ended up gaining so much more than a remodeled home. They fell in love in the process.

“Yes. The main house at least. There are still a few small cabins scattered in the treeline behind the house that I’m considering updating for rental property, but I’m not in any hurry. It’s not like Adam has time for that right now with the resort project.” Camille looks up at Adam and grins. “I might need to find a new contractor.”

“Nonsense,” Adam growls in response. From the playful expression on Camille’s face, I’d say she’s teased him about this a few times just to get him worked up. “Just say the word and I’m on it.”

“How’s the resort project coming along? Any more problems?” A few weeks ago, Adam had to fly to Chicago to put out a few fires. Last I heard, everything was still a go.

“Not yet, but it’s still early. I think the main challenge is going to be keeping the Kingslands quiet. They’re very vocal about their opinions, especially with what they do on their land. They’re too new to the area and the locals are concerned about environmental impacts. They’re making more enemies than friends.”

“I haven’t met any of them yet. I thought I’d get the chance when Leann went out with Korbin, but that didn’t last long enough.”

“What didn’t last long enough?” Joseph walks up behind me and squeezes my shoulder.

“Leann dating Korbin Kingsland.”

“Ahh.” Joseph nods. “I never met him, but Leann said he was nice enough. Just no spark. Noah, however, that boy can’t stand the oldest brother, Keaton. I think that’s his name. Says he’s a real asshole, but I don’t know what gave him that impression.”

Noah Strong is Wyatt’s, one of Adam’s closest friends, youngest brother. And he went to school with Joseph. He can be a bit of a hot head at times, but Noah is a good man. If he doesn’t like Keaton, there’s a good reason for it.

“That’s the only one I met,” Adam says. “I liked him. Seemed like a real stand-up guy. Just talks too much when he should shut it. ”

Joseph shrugs. “Maybe he said something that pissed Noah off.”

“Uncle Joe said a bad word.” Emmie scowls at him and everyone laughs.

My brothers exchange a glance and Camille reaches for Emmie. “Wanna come with me to get some cookies? I saw some yummy looking chocolate chip cookies over there that I’d like to try.”

“Yes!” Cami takes Emmie and I turn to face my brothers.

“So,” Joseph steps closer after they’re gone and leans in before he continues. “Leann says Jessica doesn’t want to sell. Says she’s thinking about staying here now that the vineyard is hers.”

My head snaps up, and I meet Joseph’s stare. I haven’t heard anything, and this news has my ears ringing and my stomach feeling like someone dropped a lead weight inside me. If she said anything to Ryan, he’s been closed lipped about it.

If she stays, then maybe I’ll get the chance to win her back. Then again, if she refuses me, I’ll have to live in the same town as her. Knowing she’s here and I can never have her would be the worst form of torture. “How would Leann know that?”

“You know Leann and Gracie Strong are close friends now. Apparently, Jessica’s been spending a lot of time with them this past week.”

Jessica and Gracie, Noah and Wyatt’s sister, were best friends back in the day so it makes sense that she would go to her for support. I hadn’t considered that as an option for her. “I thought she was hiding out at Sweet Cakes?”

“That, too. Apparently, she’s working hard to avoid you,” Joseph says.

“So, what’s the deal?” Adam asks. “Are you and Emmie gonna have to move out?”

“I don’t know. But it's a strong possibility. I haven’t had a chance to talk to Jess about it. She’s succeeding at avoiding me. I haven’t really seen her since she arrived.”

“Well, here’s your chance.” Joseph nods behind me. “She’s coming right for us.”

I glance over my shoulder and sure enough Jessica is walking right for me. And not just Jessica, but the man I saw her with years ago when I surprised her by coming to her graduation when she finished her MBA. Every ounce of jealousy I’ve ever had resurfaces as I recall the way he hugged her and then kissed her cheek while I was waiting to surprise her.

I’d slipped my hand into my pocket so many times over the past hour to make sure the ring was still there. I’ve waited so long for this moment. Now that Jessica has finished her MBA and I was halfway through vet school in Colorado, I was ready to take the plunge and make it official. Today, I would ask her to marry me.

I would’ve done it years ago, but I’d been scared she’d decide I wasn’t enough for her. I’d gotten so used to people walking away from me, there was a part of me that expected her to do it, too. She’d only ever told me how much she loved me, but it’s hard to overcome childhood fears. I never knew my biological father and my mother left me for drugs. I was also shuffled from one foster home to another—none of them able to handle me and my issues—before I came to live with the Langdons. It was hard overcoming that shit and accepting I was good enough for someone like Jessica.

But after six years apart, and only seeing each other on breaks and the infrequent surprise visit, we still loved each other. If anything, the distance has made my love for her stronger. I thought that was true for her, too. Today was the day I’d find out.

I didn’t tell her I was coming, but I made sure I arrived before the ceremony began so I could watch her walk across the stage and collect her diploma. With her MBA finished, there was nothing else stopping her from starting a life with me.

I hoped she still wanted that as much as I did.

I was waiting in the hallway outside the door where one of the organizers assured me all the graduates would exit. It was a crowded hall. There were a lot of other people waiting for their graduate to exit. I hoped I didn’t miss her in the sea of faces.

Jessica’s parents were waiting outside. They arrived this morning and decided to let me surprise her alone. I told them that wasn’t necessary, but they knew what I had planned and wanted to let me do it without them as an audience.

A few minutes later the door opened, and the graduates started piling out. I waited for what felt like an eternity before I caught a glimpse of her radiant smile. I started to run toward her, but stopped when I realized she wasn’t alone.

My heart dropped and every dream I had for our future shriveled up and retreated in on me. Another man had his arm around her shoulder. She looked up at him with the same smile that was always reserved for me. He whispered something in her ear, making her laugh. I hated seeing another man make her laugh. But then he kissed her on the cheek.

Was she blushing?

My first instinct was to punch him in the face and steal my girl out of his embrace. Instead, I spun around and ran my fingers through my hair. This wasn’t happening. My worst fear had become reality. She’d moved on and found someone better than me. I always knew I wasn’t good enough for her, but after all these years, I’d thought maybe I was wrong.

When I turned back around, the man was gone, and Jessica was headed right for me. Her smile grew when our eyes locked, and she broke into a run. She jumped into my arms and hugged me tight.

“Matt, you came.” She leaned back and kissed my lips. She looked happy to see me, but I couldn’t shake the feeling that I’d just lost the woman I loved to another man.

“Matt. Did you hear me?” I shift my gaze toward Jessica’s voice. She’s looking at me with raised brows and I realize I missed the entirety of the conversation going on around me.

“I’m sorry, what?” I shake my head and look away from the man next to her. I can feel the scowl on my face, and I don’t want to explain my jealousy.

Jessica points to the man that accompanied her. His arm is around the waist of a woman I don’t recognize. “This is my business partner and friend, David, and his wife, Blaire. They’ll be staying at the house since there’s nowhere else to rent in town. I’m just letting you know so you’re aware.”

My eyes widen as her words sink in. “Did you say business partner and his wife?”

Jessica’s brows furrow. “Yes. I’ve known David and Blaire since before grad school. He helped me secure the investors to start my business. Once it took off, he decided to stick around and help me run it.”

David holds out his hand. I stare at it for a moment too long—creating an awkward air around us—before I finally take his hand for a shake. “Sorry. Where are my manners? It's nice to meet you.”

“You, too.” David smiles, but his eyes suggest he knows what I’m thinking. He turns to the woman on his arm and kisses the top of her head. “We’ve both heard a lot about you. It’s nice to finally meet you.”

“You have, huh?” I shift my gaze to Jessica. “Because I’ve never heard anything about either of you.”

Jessica looks down at the floor and brushes her hair behind her ear. “I guess we lost contact before I ever had a chance to tell you about them. We didn’t talk a lot after you came to my graduation.”

I cross my arms over my chest. My anger is building, and I have so many questions running through my mind. I never told her I saw her with him. I stayed the night in Seattle, then headed back to Colorado first thing the next morning. We started drifting apart after that. It wasn’t immediate. We still texted and saw each other when we went home, but things between us were never the same. I’d assumed she moved on. I let her go without a fight. “True. But something tells me you knew him before that.”

I see David shift on his feet out of the corner of my eye, but I never take my eyes off Jessica. I don’t know what I expect her to say, nothing most likely, but I wait for it anyway. She doesn’t respond, so I look toward David and Blaire. “How long are you two staying? With Jessica in the guest room, I don’t have another room with a queen size bed.”

“Just for the night. We head back to Seattle tomorrow,” David says.

“I plan on moving to my old bedroom.” Jessica adds. Her voice is shaking, and she looks uncomfortable. “David and Blaire can have the guest room.”

“Sounds like you have it all worked out. If you’ll excuse me, I need to get some fresh air.” I walk toward the entrance as quickly as possible. My chest is tight, and I suddenly feel like my tie is choking me. As soon as I’m outside I fall against the side of the building and pull my tie loose.

Fuck . Did I have it all wrong back then? Did I assume she was with David when they were nothing more than friends? That one instance changed every decision I made after that. Because in my mind, I lost Jessica when I saw his arm around her.