Chapter 10

H iding out in Dorothy's guest room was not a viable option, not for as long as I'd like. It had worked well enough to chill in the bathroom until Kooky had quit the room but that was about it.

Ugh. Argh. That male. He had this weirdly calming presence. I wanted to be annoyed with him when he did stupid beast man, pushy things, and yet I somehow ended up amused or laughing, each and every time. What was wrong with me?!!

Rek has SO broken my brain. I've decided to put it all on him, because he deserves no less. Ha! ALL his fault.

"Thought I'd bring supper to you." Dorothy popped in with a plate for me and the promise of tea.

"I'm sorry, you know, for showing my ass at the table." Gesturing vaguely out the door, I grimaced. She was going above and beyond in ways most of my family, Rosie not included, never would have. And I'd opened my mouth and let it fly.

Dorothy blinked as she set my plate down on the nightstand. "Do you mean Dougie, or the trouble with your fella?"

She smiled and came to sit beside me when I froze, stiffening, and stared down at my hand where it was smoothing over my Mystery Mate's pelt. "If he even is my fella."

"He's your fella." A soft laugh left her. "Never seen him so keyed up like that, to tell you the truth. Normally such a calm, cool beast. You have that boy in knots!"

My lips tipped up a little to hear that, but then fell just as quickly. "I'd like to believe that the knots he's tied up in are the good kind." My shoulders lifted in a half shrug and I sighed tiredly. "I don't know anymore…"

"You came in with that." Her hand lifted to point at the fur under my hand. "Never seen one quite like it, pinkish orange hues in the right lighting. It's rare. This is merely a patch from the belly of the beast it comes from, to hear the boys gabbing it up about it. Is it from him? Never heard of him felling one but it could have been on a large hunt far out with his fathers." She didn't reach out to touch it, which was nice because I was feeling a mite possessive and touchy, even more so after the pain tea and paste wore off.

"It's from a him, but I don't, uh- He's like-" Trying to choose my words carefully, praying she wasn't about to repeat any of this to anyone, I got one look at the twinkling in her eyes like she had some kind of insight she wasn't going to share with me today, and I bit the inside of my cheek and clammed up. "No. Not from him. From someone else," I settled on, hoping she left it at that.

"Does Rek know?" she asked bluntly.

"Excuse me?" Yep, that was my voice all tight and squeaky high. My head whipped up to gape at her.

The half smile, forced back grimace on her face was more understanding than the rocks-in-my-gut-tumbling feeling in response would like to think.

Her hand lifted and she looked like she was about to place hers over mine, aborting the idea at the last moment at the look on my face. "Sweetie, he's your tail. Folks around here are pretty quick to pick up on things like that."

"No one's said anything," I blurted, frowning her way.

Her smile slipped into a grin. "Don't see a reason to. Why ruin a male's hunt?"

"He wishes he was hunting me," I replied with a sniff. "He's a busybody, bossy pain in my ass, is what he is."

Dorothy burst out laughing, slap your knee, throw your head back kind of fun. Going for it and cupping her hand over mine in a comforting gesture, she held it for a minute before letting go. "And don't you let him forget it."

"Was it like this for you?" I asked her, watching her as she made her way to the door.

"Like what?" Leaning against the door jamb, she crossed her arms over her chest in a casual pose.

"Impossible. Ridiculous. Complicated." With a groan, I scrubbed at my face.

"Love doesn't always come easy," she replied softly, like throwing out fun phrases like that, little pearls of wisdom, was just the thing I needed.

It wasn't.

"Nothing worth keeping is easy." Her smile was sympathetic, with a pinch of that I know something you don't know twinkle going on.

Peeking up at her, I sighed. "Important questions now," I muttered, dropping my hands to sit up straighter. "I'm assuming Oogi-Doogie is one of your progeny, loosely as I use that phrase," I started, to a nod from her, and a confirmed, "I'd apologize on Dougie's behalf but he's a big boy now and needs to be learnin' to apologize for himself. I taught him better."

"Doogie dug his own grave," I agreed, to a laugh and a shake of her head at me. "Came at me gums flappin', shootin' blanks."

Flapping the towel in her hand at me as she laughed at my joking dramatics, she added, "All the same, I maintain he could use to relearn himself some manners." Scowling now, looking like she was about to slip into a long diatribe about naughty children, a snort escaped me.

When she looked to me, askance, I smirked. "Really, Doro? Dougie? It's like you were begging them to butcher his name into Doogie-woogi or whatever they call him. You Oogie-ed him into this." Laying it on thick, hearing a low growl building from elsewhere in Dorothy's abode, I tsked. "Poor Doogie-woogi. No wonder he's such a sad panda."

Dorothy's eyebrows shot up. She tried to look stern, pursing her lips, but that telltale twitch and just how tightly she had to hold them pinched tight, this shit was in the bag. "It's a family name," she stated simply, and left it at that.

"I'm assuming he still lives at home?" I ventured casually.

The sudden thudding of heavy footfalls headed our way had me grinning winningly.

"You're horrible," Dorothy whispered. "Just horrible. You know that?"

Coming up behind his mother, towering over her from behind, the male himself shot a finger at me, baring his teeth, to snarl out indignantly, "Doogie has hut! Doogie hunts! Doogie- Doogie good male! Doogie has man-nerds!"

"Go man-nerds." Lifting my arm, I gave a fist pump.

Sighing heavily, Dorothy turned, motioning for her supersized manchild to get out of her way. "It's like having the daughter we just kept tryin' for, taunting her brothers into getting their shit straight, and she's just like ‘em!"

"Hah! Hear that, Douglas, I'm like family? The sister you never got, born of a different mister." Beaming up at the male, who had gone from annoyed, angry, to flummoxed and flustered in a second, I had to admit I was quite enjoying this little game. I'm horrible like that. I'd always wanted a little brother.

Spluttering noises left poor Doogie-oogi, my freshly adopted kin.

"Should I start calling you Bubby Dougie now? Or too soon?" I asked idly, tapping my finger to my lip in thought.

"Bubby?" You'd think I'd just lobbed an insult at the male, or an actual object of some sort. "Doogie no' bubby. Bad Jo-"

A short, sharply growled noise from somewhere in the house had the male clamming up, though he looked like he'd very much like to start spewing whatever he meant to say at me.

"I'm sorry, bubby. You're going to have to say that louder. Sissy Jo can't quite hear you from all the way over there." Tapping my ear, my lips drew down. "Human ears and hearing and all that." God, it felt so good to cut my teeth on the easily riled male. Maybe that was my problem. Yetiville was way too tempting— all these easy targets.

A soft, low growl, like I was dealing with an angry dog, left the male. When a much louder one rent the air, to match, Dorothy called out, "It's good practice for you, son, like we've talked about! Don't let her get to you! "

Was she actually giving me permission to rile her manchild so he could work on his peopling skills?

"For when you bring me a sister-in-law," I told him, grinning winningly.

"Not Doogie sibling! Not Doogie sissy- Not Doogie anyfing!" Doogie burst out in exasperation. He was dealing with a bat shit crazy lady that needed to blow off steam. Did he not clue into that yet? Just walk away, Dougie! It's not like I could just rush off elsewhere.

"Well… technically," I started, waving a hand about airily, "your bubby is married to my cousin, right, so that makes me… the cousin-in-law, sister by way of being the daughter of your mother's heart," I informed him.

Dougie was scowling so hard, face a stony looking, inward pinched puss of a grimace, frozen for so long I wondered as he stayed like that and held it if I'd actually gone and done it— broken the sad lil fella.

"Mama!" Dougie finally managed to garble out, springing back to life. He sounded like a little kid whose big sister had just taken his toy. Glancing my way long enough I got a gander of the worried look on his fluffy mug, his concern that I might actually somehow truly be related to him a horrifying enough thought he had to investigate my suggested nightmare fuel, I grinned and threw him a little wave as he continued to call out for his mama and stormed down the hall.

Flopping back atop the pelt laid out across the bed, I laid there for a long moment, wondering how this madness had all come to be my life.

I was picking on a big old man-baby Yeti for funsies. My mate, or I think he was my mate, was so freaked out by the thought of getting freaky deaky on me he tucked tail and ran at the first peek of that sexy, bossy side of himself. Rek was basically fleecing my place every chance he got, one item at a time, to "punish" me, and would gladly turn me into his mindless breeder if I let him, unwilling to settle for anything else. Bum-bum has lost his mind, hopefully momentarily. I still had no clue who my Mystery Mate was, who was sadly ahead of the race, even if I counted Gopher's and Rek's efforts combined. And I haven't heard hide nor hair of Fuck N Run since he fucked and ran.

Closing my eyes, lifting my arms to settle my hands behind my head, I focused on breathing.

It'll be okay. It's all going to work out how it's supposed to. Somehow. Was that not some sort of inspirational poster or meme or something?

Aw, fuck. Who was I kidding? This is all shit. Everything is shit. All of it. Gone to shit.

That's not to mention the fact I had nowhere to go, currently. I'd drive Dorothy crazy if I stayed here and I knew it— her sons were just so damn easy to get all worked up, it took such minimal effort! Her males were immune and found me amusing, which was its own kind of fun, I'd admit.

Staying here and turning her hair grey was so not fair to her and I owed her, big time. There was the whole Krampus-snatch hunt thing, whatever it was called. The Great Snatch-hunt. A snort of a laugh left me.

A frown beetled my brow. Was she safe if I stayed here? Would anyone I stayed with be? Or would I be painting a target on them as well, putting them in the way of unnecessary danger? Could I-

"Jo?"

My eyes popped open and I glanced towards the door.

Mr. Grumpypants stood in the doorway, typical half frown on his unsmiling mug.

"Kookypants," I greeted. "What calls thee to my chambers? Back for more? Is verbal sparring your thing?"

The male shook his head but grinned. "Mosoau," he corrected, pointing to himself.

Well, shit. "Oops. Sorry. You two look scarily similar from this angle," I apologized, scrambling to sit up.

Mosoau didn't seem to mind, shrugging his big shoulders. "Same sac," he said simply, making me think he meant they were twins.

"Clone wars closeness in the looks department kinda fun. Cool beans, fluff daddy." My head bobbed in a nod. "So… what's the deal, Lucille? You beckoned thee?"

Blinking, standing there staring at me as he tried to work out all of that nonsense I'd just laid on him, he shook his head as if to slough it all off, taking a minute to gather himself before rumbling out in his deep, gravelly voice, "Find place Joad-knee stay."

Huh. I'll be damned. "Really?" Sitting up, I scooted back so I could start to gather my pelt and purse, surprised I'd managed to hold onto Big and Yellow, my banana colored handbag and trusted sidekick, throughout everything. I mean, I had to have, otherwise, how the hell did it make it over here? Right?

Staring at it stupidly for a full minute plus as I thoroughly questioned my sanity on that one, a rough throat clearing brought me back around.

"Is it an empty place?" I questioned. "I'm not the best house guest, as you can clearly already tell, I'm sure. With the, you know who, and their you know what in the works, is it actually safe for me to be hanging around with anyone? Is it safe for you all here?" Biting my lip, I swallowed thickly. Shit. Were they all at risk from Krampus BS due to me? For taking me in? Was ANYWHERE safe?

Someone called out from the living room area, it sounded like, and Mosoau called back. Looking to me, he assured me, "Joad-knee beed safe. Rothy beed safe. Alls safe. Joad-knee no have share hut."

Staring down at the tips of my boots, I blurted, "Are you sure it'll be fine?"

Mosoau gave a firm nod.

If there was one thing about Dorothy's mates, it was that I trusted them to think of everyone's safety. They were good guys. Most of them aided in village enforcing in some capacity. A less part of the Watchers, as I'd heard Dorothy call them.

"Okay. Well, then, when do we leave?" Slipping on the shawl from my mystery mate, I gathered my pelt into my lap. I loved rubbing this damn thing. It was like a big hug, a comfort item.

Mosoau gave a grunt as Dorothy's voice carried in from the vicinity of their kitchen. "To be fair to her, you have to admit you had a hand in starting it," she was saying, her voice trailing off.

Whatever Dougie grumbled had her chuffing out a huff. "It's rude to ask things like that and you know it! What did you think was going to happen? She's as prickly as your daddy on a good day and, frankly, my dear, it's none of your damn business! That's between her and her male!"

"Not butts in," a male voice added. "Celuk find Gofur. Say hims has Lhorstavorskrhut."

"Oh my, well, that does explain it, doesn't it? It also complicates things," Dorothy murmured.

"She hears!" Mosoau called out to them as my face flushed and I wondered what the hell that thing was that they said Gopher had that complicated things was. Was it an illness? Did he need help for it? So, then it wasn't some stupid word for peeing after all.

As if to save me from the myriad of questions threatening to overtax my brain, it was Dougie to the win, muttering something very quietly to his mother that had her spluttering incredulously.

"No, she is not actually your sister! Why would you- How- How would that even be possible?" Dorothy burst out. "She was teasing you, Dougie-bear! Criminy!"

"We could go now," I suggested to the bruiser of a beast. "Now is good."

"Do you not have anything better to do than take up space in my kitchen?!" she castigated Dougie. "Is there not something to hunt, skin, gut? I dunno, a chore to be done? I could give you some, you need ‘em. I'm sure your daddies could put you to work if you've got nothing better to do than sneak batter and say silly things. I mean this with all the love for you in my heart— boy, you best be gettin' on outta my hair!"

Mosoau nodded and gave a grunt. "Now. Now good," he agreed. Coming to me, he kneeled and held his arms out for me to roll myself into them.

Not particularly keen on the idea, I stalled.

"If you have a stick or something I could use as a crutch, I'm sure I could manage my way there at a hobble, assuming it's not far?" I suggested.

"Mosoau bring Joad-knee outside. Joad-knee see, yes?" Glancing over his shoulder as the sound of Doogie's laughter and Dorothy's threats to smack him with a wooden spoon if he didn't quit pestering her growing, pretty sure I didn't want to tangle with Dorothy and ruin that whole daughter she never had thing we had going when she got going like that, I scooted my butt to the edge of the bed and slid into Mosoau's arms.

"Alrighty then, Moose-cow. Take Bad Jo to this seeing." Adjusting the shawl over my shoulders, my pelt draped over it, I peered up at the male as he stood but had yet to get this wagon train-a-movin'.

The ‘Are you for real?' look he was giving me had me grinning sheepishly. "I've said it once, I'll say it ‘til I lose my voice, the second you all stop butchering my name, I'll stop with the super fun nickety names, ‘kay?"

"See what my Rothy mean, say you girl youngling she never haved. Mouthy, like my Rothy," he muttered, yet smiled and chuckled softly as he said it.

"I heard that, you moose!" Dorothy called out from the kitchen. Masculine laughter and smacking sounds drifted in from there.

"I think I'm going to love being an unofficial member of your crazy group," I told him.

Mosoau gave me a big smile full of teeth, something in his eye, a funny twinkle to it, squishing my fun times fit of the sillies, giving me pause.

To cut that shit off at the pass, I warned him, "Look, you've got a funny look in your eyes. No funny business. None of that let's hook her up with such and such because she looks so sad and lonely kinda stuff. I'm not. So don't."

"Moose-cow not," he promised. So then why did he look like he was trying not to laugh his ass off or grin like a crazy person?

The more I tried to think about it, the queasier my stomach grew. Nope. I didn't want to know.

If they mock adopted me, that might give them the impression they can help a gal out. Fuck to the no.

"Pinky swear?" I grumbled, holding out my left pinky.

Mosoau had carried me to the front door and called out to someone outside, who opened the door for him. He glanced from my pinky to the worried look on my face, but I quickly grew distracted by the short sled and weird looking beast waiting impatiently to pull it awaiting me outside.

"Whoa. A potato-corn?! What in the wonkydoodle nutsackery is this?" I burst out, eyeing my very own personal transport, complete with Kookypants and a robust looking polka dotted potato-corn all hitched up to it.

"What that?" one of the males waiting around, talking to Kookypants, asked me, jerking his chin towards my upturned pinky.

"I wanted Mosoau to promise he wasn't going to trick me into anything, like trying to set me up with manchild Dougie or some crazy nonsense."

All males present, but for Kookypants, cracked up laughing.

"It's really not that funny. Have you met your son?" I grumbled, to Mosoau's renewed laughter.

"Do-glass silly. Never growed up. Needs learn be warrior, good male, like Rothy say, but much nicer than Mosoau," Heckes admitted with a grimace.

"Need bossy mate, make him listen, both ears. Drag by hand, like Rothy and Griever," Lukar agreed, leaning in to place a container next to me and toss me a nod.

"Bah! Gets from Luka! Need finish him's hut, join more hunts, not live with Griever til' Doro comes takes him by ear," Griever chimed in, adding a small tin cup that was nearly identical to Mystery Mate's to my pile.

"Needs to stay ten feet away from me at all times if he knows what's good for him, clear of shin kicking territory from the Joanie. He's a turd in broccoli burger with cheese and I'm big ol' bottle of extra spicy sauce. We just don't mix," I added, just in case they were starting to get any weird ideas. "I'm a headache and a half with an overflowing plate. Joanie don't got time for manchildren."

"Not Joanie," Mosoau assured me as he helped me settle in. Grinning, he ruffled my hair, then hooked his pinky finger on mine and shook it. "Joanie haves mate. No needs hookeds ups. What Dougie want him's auntie?"

"His what now?" I screeched as Kookypants let out a soft growl, then made a loud clicking noise with his tongue and teeth that had potato-corn kicking into gear, sending us lurching forward.

Kooky was so not the jokey joke like that type and in this instance I totally felt him on that.

Dorothy's mates chortled like fools amongst themselves as they waved me off and we shot off towards this place I could stay by myself that was totally cool with whomever the heck they were, at least until this whole Krampus-snatch thing all blew over.

A bit of time by myself, all to myself, as long as the place wasn't a total dump, that actually sounded like a vacation from all the drama of late.

Grimacing as we bumped along, noting the simple design of the sled, the tall sides, the bits of bark at my feet here and there, it was probably for moving decent amounts of lumber a fair distance. And now it was hauling my lumbering ass, har-har.

Eh. I'd always wanted to go on a sleigh ride. Sitting up straighter, wincing as my hip protested, I uncorked the bottle of hot numbing brew stuff, had myself a nice, long, slow sip, but not too much because I'd like to be coherent and awake for this once in a lifetime opportunity, having myself a look around at the scenery passing us by, I soaked it all in.

It was beautiful. No matter how much I complained about the snow and the cold, the wilderness surrounding, there was no denying it was a sight to behold.

If only it was Krampus and gobble-you-up-quick beasts free.

Glancing from Kooky, riding that wild looking, Willy Wonka dotted beastie bareback with ease, talking to the beast in his language quietly as it loped along, I smiled.

This was nice. More than nice. I felt like a princess. I was pretty sure that wasn't the magical brew talking. Erm. Ninety nine percent sure.

Dorothy's place bordered along what I considered the near outskirts of our little town, close enough to the heart of the village, the market and all that, but backed along that vast everything else behind it.

We were taking some kind of backway I'd yet to take before. The further he drove, the taller and thicker the trees grew, some faded shades of blues, green, and purple blacks mixed in here and there, until that's all there was.

A bit longer and I spotted a thinning amongst the trails just off the snow beaten path, a telling smokestack in the distance. Not too far now.

A pinch of disappointment hit me. I'd been hoping for something closer to town, less of a trek from my cousin. I'd go through withdrawals without my god-babies fix! I loved those little boogers. And of course chilling with my cousin, but she was well aware where she stood on the Joanie's love pecking order— and was totally cool coming in second to her kids.

Biting at the inside of my cheek, it was on the tip of my tongue to ask if it was going to be much farther out. I really didn't want to actually leave the village. Maybe I wouldn't be as vulnerable to Krampus out here, but I'd be all the fuck alone. I mean, all alone.

The sleigh hit rocks- No, gravel, rumbling along for the next good bit.

The simple wooden seat I'd planted my rump onto was a bit too smooth, sanded down and coated to a fine finish and angled in such a way that it sent me sliding down the short bench until I had to grip the sides of the sleigh and shove myself backwards to keep from tumbling right off of it.

Distracted by all of this, my head jerked up as Kooky made that weird clicking noise again, rumbled something in his language, then what sounded like the word or phrase behbeh, and we came to a smooth stop.

It was more than a shock to find myself parked right out front of the McMansion from the other night. It looked even more… grand in the waning daylight. I'd been so distracted trying to force my ass to stay put without irritating my broken butt I'd missed my own grand entrance.

"I- I'm going to stay here?" I sounded as breathless as I felt. Princess? Pfft. This shit was fit for a queen. A queen of Glamazon proportions.

This was a castle of beastly real estate around these here parts, and my ass got to hang here?!

Giddy at the idea, though I was still feeling very wary over this whole chill at a stranger's pad thing, I startled when the sleigh creaked as Kooky's hand fell on the side and he hoisted himself up to reach in and help me out.

"I get to stay here?" It beared repeating. "All by myself?"

Kooky paused to glance at the place briefly over his shoulder, then back at me. "Jes."

My hands gripped the sides of the sleigh a little tighter, my gaze level with his as he reached in towards me and I instinctively jerked back.

"What's the catch?" My feet dug in and I tensed, something Kooky took note of and immediately backed the fuck up.

My god, a male who can not only take note of things but react accordingly? Dorothy works miracles. Teach them! Teach them all, you intuitive beast!

"Catch?" he said slowly, glancing from the house and then back to me.

"Whose place is this?" My brow tugged into a frown as these eyeballs shot from the house to him, then the house again.

Kooky paused for a minute before answering. "Celuk."

"Celuk?" The breath I'd been holding rushed out of me. "Celuk as in, Bia and Noyel's uncle? That guy? The one they call crazy? Crazy Uncle Celuk? THAT guy?"

"Luk not stay. Hunt," he grunted out.

I noted he did not argue the claim of craziness of said Crazy Uncle Celuk. That did not bode well, to my way of thinking. Fuck me.

"Nope. Nuh-uh." Hunching down in my seat, I shook my head. "Not doing. I am not staying in some crazy guy's house all by myself. Sounds like a trap or something!"

"No' trap." Kooky's lips twitched and he was giving me a look that said he was wondering if I was the one not playing with a full deck.

Lips pursing, eyes narrowing, I gave Kooky a good once over. "Where are you going to be?"

Kooky gave me a surprised look. I'd totally caught him off guard. "Take Jo. Go. Lur-eaves."

"Leave? Go where?" I murmured, eyeing his thick knuckles, noting the myriad of heavy callouses covering his blunt fingers.

"Hunt," he grunted out, lifting a hand to scratch at his head, wondering why the fuck I was stalling, probably.

"Hunt?" My eyes narrowed on him until they were tiny little slits studying him shrewdly. "Around here?"

He gave a grunt I knew meant yes. I'd hung around enough Lo denaii to know a confirming yes grunt from a definite no one.

"And then what?" I pressed.

He blinked, then blinked some more. "Then… eat. Sleep." A deep grunt issued from the beast. "Hunt ‘gain." His wide shoulders lifted in a short shrug.

"How well do you know this Celuk? Are you going to be hunting with him? Is that where you're going? Do you trust him?" It took me a minute as his gaze fell to my lips and he eyed them, he was watching me bite at the inside of my cheek.

I had it on good authority I looked funny when I did this, unlike all those stupid descriptions in books that made it sound cute or endearing. I looked like I was trying to cannibalize the flesh in my mouth.

Forcing my lips to stop looking like I'd sucked a lemon, I took a deep breath. Not like I had a lot of options at the moment, especially if I was going to keep this whole Krampus thing on the downlow. The enforcers wanted to keep this all hushity hush, and I'd agreed to shut my fat trap in exchange for their help with this whole Krampus-snatch target supposedly on my back. This was like Yeti witness protection or some shit.

"Celuk's your brother. Of course you'd vouch for him," I muttered, putting my hand in his finally, holding my breath as I hoisted my thick butt up and carefully exited the wood sleigh. There was something so virile and sexy about a nice set of man-hands, the warmth of them seeping into me. Ugh. Distracting. "Do you really trust him, honestly? I have your word he's a good guy? He won't hurt me or try and molest me, in my sleep or otherwise? Or force himself on me? I won't wake up to him hovering over me, demanding I be his ladywife or whatever?"

"No." Kooky shook his head as he carefully lifted me into his arms and carried me inside. "No. Celuk no do things."

"I have your word?" I stressed.

"Words," he swore.

The inside of Celuk's pad was insane. Hardwood floors gleamed, thick rugs, the biggest fireplace I'd ever seen with several hooks for cookpots. This shit was FANCY. Fluffy, puffy, stuffed couches fit for even a biggun of a Yeti were placed near a wall made of rough stone. The other wall was some sort of sandy plaster. From the stones to the plaster, everything gleamed and shined, like it had been sprinkled with craft herpes, aka glitter.

A dark, heavy wood grain table as long as Dorothy's extendable one, mismatched chairs surrounding it, was situated across from a kitchen bigger than even Mina's, and hers was freaking nice.

A lot of thought went into this place. A lot. Maybe a lot of crazy thought, bah dum tss.

Crazy Uncle Celuk was a nester.

The area was big, bright, airy, inviting. Thick wooden beams over my head with that A frame shape made me wonder if it was hard to heat this place, though maybe the super-sized fireplace aided with that. The smell of treated dung chips and firewood tickled my nose. It smelled as good as anything Gopher had concocted.

"Jo?" Kooky called loudly, jerking me back to the present. Lost in my own little world, I must've zoned out on the guy.

"Hm?" I mumbled.

"Give words," he told me.

Holding up my hand, I thrust my pinky out. Waiting for him to catch on, I wiggled it at him. "You can't break a pinky swear."

Nodding, he glanced from my pinky to me, looking so serious about it as he hooked his with mine and we shook on it, it was actually kind of cute.

"Carebear-swear," I said, and he dutifully replied, "Cardboardscare."

A laugh burst out of me unbidden. I blamed the soup-hooch starting to make my head feel all pleasantly blank and swimmy, shitting all over our moment.

"Great. Now, could you be a dear and grab my things from the sleigh?" Lifting my hand, I waved it at him imperiously. To be honest, I was desperate to make my way to the little ghouls' room and take care of pressing personal business that did not need witnesses.

What I wouldn't give to have my fucking menstrual cup! Rek, you thieving ass face!

Eyeing me like he wasn't sure how to take my sudden relaxed mood, the swift change in it, or my bossy ordering of him around, he gave a grunt of agreement and then walked outside.

By the time he'd made it back inside with my things, I'd hustled my ass across the room, eyeballing every door and doorway, looking for any hint of a designated bathroom. When I found it was about the time Kooky found me.

Sputtering noises left me. That was exactly how he found me, gaping at a crystal filled rock wall that essentially made the bathroom wall nearly completely see-through. While the pretty crystal mural was quite beautiful to look at, it was beyond impractical.

"I'm not dealing with having Aunt Judy around with- with that!" My hand lifted, finger jabbing.

"No Judy. Celuk' hut." Kooky glanced from the bathroom curiously, to my jab-happy digit.

"My period. Lady time. The monthly bleed. I am not dealing with the red death, get the jist fuzzywumpkins, or any other bodily needs that might arise, in a see-through bathroom!"

Kooky leaned in past my hand, until he was trying to peer through one of the hazy white crystals. "Fuzzy. No see," he tried to assure me.

Careful of my hip, I stomped the opposite foot. "You can see right through it!"

"Fuzzy," he repeated, then opened the heavy looking bathroom door to light the oil lamp just inside and stand on the other side. "Jo see?"

"Lift your arms," I instructed.

He did, and I added as I squinted at him, "Pat your head."

One hand fell to his head and he began to pat it.

"Now rub your belly," I deadpanned.

The same hand began to rub his belly, the other loose at his side.

"Hop on one foot and sing Twinkle Twinkle," I ordered next.

"Jo no see," he rumbled out abruptly and immediately stopped rubbing his belly.

"I can see anyone who might step foot in here will get a blurry front row seat to me using the facilities." Shaking my head, I started to walk away, remembered exactly why I'd tried so hard to hightail it over here, and sighed noisily.

"What wrong?" he rumbled out instantly, eyeing me for clues. Kooky picked up fast. I appreciated that extra sense in a beast.

What was wrong, he asks? Well, for starters…

"I need to go, you know , as well as take care of some pressing lady needs. I'm not comfortable using that, or possibly having a run in with Celuk, should he choose to pop in unexpectedly while I'm in there and get a free fuzzy peep show. I wished I had all my shit here if I'm gonna be here for a while. Makeshift pads are great and all in a pinch but they've got nothing on the washable ones in my suitcase, or my damn menstrual cup, wherever the fuck its run off to, I've got no clue at this point, and some beastie takes perverse delight in tormenting me by hiding my things. I feel a bit like a broken doll. I'm tired, my head, hip, thigh, buttcheeks, and everything in between hurt. I'm bleeding like a stuck pig— that's a phrase— you come near my lady bits to fact check me and I'll brain ya. I'm worried about the Krampus, about being alone, about my cousin finding out about all the things I've been keeping from her, about just about every fucking thing else wrong with my life that I'm not about to divulge to a practical stranger, and if you tell anybody about any of the things I just told you, the crazy garden in desperate need of a weeding outback will find itself with a very noticeable, Lo denaii sized lump!"

"What- Mens-strawl cup?" Lifting the cup for the magic brew, hooked on his finger, I couldn't help it when I laughed.

"It's for lady stuff. I'd draw you a picture but the pen in my purse ran out of ink. And I'm not ashamed of talking you through how it works but I've been told by other Lo denaii it sounds weird." Gesturing towards the door, I sighed noisily while he stood there, expression perfectly blanked, and watched me.

"Could you do me a favor and stand there with your back to the wall, be my lookout?"

His gaze went from curious to the lady has given me a mission . "Jes," he said with a firm nod, then took up sentry.

Hurrying into the bathroom, I quickly took care of business and washed my hands. My next problem was what to do with the women's cloths I'd be needing to wash thoroughly to dry and reuse. Some ladies had perfected making their own washable, reusable pads. I'd brought my own, bought during my gal pal time with Booger, so it hadn't been an issue up until now.

My cheeks heated at the idea of asking Kooky about all of this. What the heck would he know what to do, and why should he?

A loud snuffling noise from my sentry had him calling out, "Jo?"

"I, uh, erm- So, uh, I'm gonna need some really strong soap and a clean bucket no one's real fond of," I called back.

"For Aunts Judy, jes?" A grunt left him and he muttered as he disappeared past the crystal wall, "Jes." His words slipped into his language, but it didn't matter if I heard.

My hand, freshly washed and still damp from drying it off, clapped to my mouth to muffle my laughter at his reaction. Oh, I am so ruining these males. Before I knew it everyone would be calling Aunt Flo Aunt Judy. The jig would be up. There were going to be some supremely confused beings not in the know, human and beast alike. Joanie created chaos— my favorite kind of fun.

By the time everything was sorted out on that front and Kooky had helped me back to the couch, then stoked the fire and put something on to eat, the stars were bright in the night sky, peeking in from the bowed out looking, wood trimmed windows. The glass in the window frames literally curved outward, if by accident or weird design, I wasn't sure, but the effect was interesting as snow fell to them and eventually rolled right off.

"So… you just eat, poop, sleep, and hunt, huh? All hunt and no play makes Kooky a happy Lo denaii?" Eyeing the male, I marveled at how at ease he was in the kitchen. He looked like he ate meat raw, bathed in rivers, and pooped in the woods, not Mr. Homemaker.

He was like Booger on a cookie baking bender, but with stew and surprisingly soft bread. I still sucked on the cookstove front in comparison to the Boogster or Goph but in that respect I had Rek beat by a mile. Practice makes perfect? Well, my ass was trying with my limited resources. Whole lotta stewin' and pot made bread goin' on.

I hadn't made anything extra crispy or unintentionally blackened in quite a while. That counted for something. Yay me.

"Jes," he said simply after a moment of contemplation. Ha-hah! And now I had him!

"Then… you won't mind hanging around here in between all the stuff I'm not interested in? You know, everything but the eating and the sleeping." Thinking better of what I'd just said, I was quick to elaborate, "Sleeping as in just sleeping, not like I'm interested in you sleeping, or watching you sleep or- Uhm, pooping… And I'm making this weird." Shaking my head, a self-conscious laugh left me.

A soft noise had me looking up, spying Kooky as about a dozen emotions flit across his hard features.

"Look, don't get the wrong idea, I'm not asking you to stay with me stay with me, I mean, I mean stay with me, but not like, uh, like that , you know what I mean?"

"Stay but not stay with Jo," he rumbled out softly. His eyes looked more grey than blue in the firelight, deep and sharp, crisp. Sometimes they'd get so dark I'd swear they were nearly black, that blue rimming the pupil fairly glowing, electric, and at other times the grey stood out more than the blue, eclipsing them in gun metal grey shot through with icy white tipped cobalt. It was like they shifted with his emotions as much as the light he was under.

"It's not like I can just scrounge up a friend to come stay with me, not without letting them in on what all the hell's going on, and Celuk is your brother or whatever, right, so he won't get mad if you stay over here instead of some person he doesn't know…" Pulling out the big guns, I gave him my best pretty please, puppy dog eyes look.

Eyeing me, the male had the audacity to snort at me, the soft chuff he let out proceeding it informing me he wasn't the kinda guy to fall for anyone's bullshit.

Why did I find that appealing?

"I don't want to be left alone for some idiot to come stumble across, piss me off, then have to go through all the trouble of hunting down a shovel to dispose of the body, or maybe for Celuk to come in and I dunno what, we aren't going to even go there, but you can already tell I'm not the best guest or most social of sorts, my manners are shit, friendo, and I'm not above begging." Batting my lashes at him, I preened. "Pretty please?" Reaching out, I held my hand out to him, palm up and angled downward, exposing my wrist. I'd seen beasties offering each other the gesture and from what I'd gleaned, it was a sort of universal sign for I trust you, trust me, I'm sorry, I accept your apology, amongst beastly dude bros. "We've got this groove going. You're not going to try and jump me and force me into being your broodmare, and I'll offer you sage advice on keeping your future lady and let you live. See? We both win!"

Strange as it might sound, Kooky was, but for his ridiculous name, a male I felt like I could trust. Crazy to even think, considering our rather short acquaintance but Lo denaii weren't exactly the best actors/pretenders, and Kooky wasn't making any efforts to impress me, not that I was picking up on. The extra crispy blackened toast he'd produced from that marvelously soft bread of his that he'd actually tried to serve me with a disgustingly guilty look on his furry mug was proof enough.

One look at my raised-eyebrowed stare and one hard tap on my bowl that chipped the edge, our toast bricks were set aside and a fresh, squishy loaf was split between us.

The male's brow pulled into a heavy frown, brightening gaze traveling from my held out wrist to the dead as shit serious look on my face.

"I don't want your peepee, Kooky-pooky. This isn't a trick. Carebear-swear," I snarked, lifting my free hand to cross my heart and then place my hand over it.

"Talk funny," he grunted out, his voice gone deep and gravelly. Picking up my bowl, dark eyes shot towards the magic brew I'd polished off with my food. It wouldn't be long now and it would be night-night for Joanie here. Hence, why I'd asked him to stay. The more lightheaded and tipsy I felt, the more my anxiety ratcheted up.

I felt… safer knowing he'd be looking out for me while I was completely incapacitated. Not once had that dude peeked at me when I had to do my business. Not once! Not that I had any idea why the fuck he'd want to.

"Sleepies make say silly wor-eds," he grunted out softly.

"Sure, I say silly shit, human phrases, inside jokes, but I'm totally serious about asking you to room with me while I'm here. But like, in your own separate space, you feel me?" Some truth bombs were going to need to be dropped if I meant to convince him here. He was looking mighty reluctant to be hanging out here alone with me, which just made me all the more convinced this was a great idea. He wasn't interested in boning me. This was perfect!!

Blowing out a deep breath, I stood, a bit off balance from the knockout broth brew stuff but pleasantly numb to the point my hip pain was tolerable enough I could walk around with a barely noticeable limp. "I don't want to be alone." Adjusting the strap of my purse over my shoulder, I turned away from him, glad of the distraction, to pick up my Mystery Mate's pelt. "I'm so fucking sick of being alone. Not like alone-alone, but that alone feeling even when you're surrounded by a room of fucking people but you're like on the outside looking in and you have no damn clue how to be let in. I want to feel like someone totally has my back, no loyalties conflicting." Turning back towards him, I couldn't help but grin at the look on his face. "Don't look so surprised. You're fun to needle, a decent conversationalist without making everything about wanting lady advice, about just you and how great you are, trying to make a move on me that would absolutely not be appreciated, demanding this or that from me that just ain't gonna happen, a master of the cook pot but shit at toast." My shoulders lifted in a shrug. "We can't all be perfect, ahem, like me."

He huffed out a puffing chuff, sarcasm expressed Lo denaii style, when I tossed him an overdone wink. "Here," he rumbled out curtly, hovering to make sure I didn't tumble tits over arse on my way across the room, herding me towards a long hall with a series of doors along either side.

At the very last door on the end, he opened it and disappeared inside. By the time he had the lamps lit and a single stubby, fat candle sat on a clay plate on a thick bedside table, I'd shuffled my way carefully to the door.

"Whoa. This place is fancy." A long, slow whistle left me. "Sharp," I mumbled, eyeballing the large bed piled high with furs that made up the guest bedroom.

It was simple, understated, very man of the wild bachelor style, and beyond elegant for something of the likes of Yetidom.

"Celuk must be, like, the big machismo around here if these are his guest accommodations," I said absently, gingerly planting my butt on the comfiest bed I'd ever rested my rump on.

A big smile lit my face as I toed off my boots. Mama likes.

"No cheese," Kooky grunted out, turning to rummage through the walk-in closet sized cubby area with a pelt hanging over it for a makeshift door.

"Machismo," I said with a laugh as I glanced down my person. It wasn't going to be pleasant sleeping in my only pair of clothes on hand and I wasn't about to climb into bed in nothing but the equivalent of a period diaper.

"Celuk wouldn't happen to have a spare shirt or something in that oversized closet I could borrow, would he?" Mentally smacking my forehead at the thought, I sighed. "I dunno why I asked. It's not like you guys run around with clothes on…"

Something soft and light smacked the side of my head as I started to shove the mass of pelts back, placing my own mating pelt over me with care.

"Hey! What the fur burgers, Lassie?! Did Timmy turn evil in that well?!"

"Eh?" he barked, as I sat there with a bit of material draped over me and a feels so good I've got no fucks to give buzz going.

"Woof." A burst of laughter left me, then another, until I was holding my stomach, cackling like a madwoman, and was a thousand percent certain I was good and broth-drunk.

The material draped over me was lifted and a very amused looking furball smirked down at me.

My laughter continued, but it quickly got ugly. I thought nothing of it then, and appreciated it when Kooky just stood there, looking lost and unsure of what to do as I had a mini meltdown. Uncontrollable laughter turned to weird sniffle-mumbles. Those walls I tried so hard to put up crumbled. Thanks, period.

I blamed it on that magical pain potion, on my vulnerable state, on finally cracking enough to break, on the confusion that is my fucking life, on Kooky's kindness and feeling unsure if I even deserved it, but one soft but firm, "Tell," as he leaned down until he was kneeling beside me, cupping my chin gently as I sniffled and snuffled like a blubbering idiot, and I croaked out, "Can I trust you?" I got a nod from him and a pinky finger held out in offering. Smiling through the tears, I hooked my finger on that bitch, shook it, and burst the hell wide open, like a busted can of biscuits exploding.

I told him too much, I knew that now as I laid here, staring at the wall blankly, blushing profusely every few minutes as relief to have told someone but knowing I'd said it ALL and what if he tells someone?! with a heaping helping of shame that I'd leaned on some near perfect to me stranger, mixed in a brutal cocktail.

As I laid there long after he'd left, assuring me of nothing as the day wore on and I remained alone, now dressed in the borrowed, flowing, loose dress thing he'd offered me from Celuk's stuff in his guest closet, I was too embarrassed to seek him out and make sure we were still cool and he didn't think I was as crazy as his brother, too worried to try, too tired to care, too depressed to contemplate leaving this bed, knowing I was the anomaly of beastdom with several failed mating attempts under my belt, too sad by it all to even think of eating, and too smart to think I could just magically fix any of it in a day.

So here I remained.

When my bladder finally screamed at me that enough was enough, I sat up with a groan. "I don't wanna," I muttered to myself. Slipping from the bed, using the shawl I'd come in with to preserve any sense of decency this gown didn't offer me with the girls swinging free in it, I had to give it to that magic brew and healing paste, I felt so much better than I had yesterday. My limp was barely there as I made my way down the hall. That shit was pure magic.

The house was empty but for the fire crackling away, no other sounds to greet me as I made my way to the restroom. My lips quirked up as I paused to study the hide tacked up over the crystal bathroom wall, and made my way inside to do my business with a much lighter step.

This place was like a tomb— comfortable, very warm, but hauntingly empty. I'm staying in a mausoleum.

How long was I expected to stay here?

No wonder Celuk was always out hunting. It was like a beautiful prison with just one person in it, a glass cage of a sort.

Grabbing my pelt, I made my way into the kitchen, nabbing a cup of water from the red clay pitcher and tin cup, and a hunk of bread sitting out, leftover from last night, and slowly headed for the overstuffed sofa to make myself right at home.

A large pile of shit in the corner near the door caught my eye. Recognizing that damaged, muddy suitcase wheel amongst the pile, the same one that was supposed to be stuffed into the floor of my hut beneath a mound of mud, a choked noise that sent bits of the bite of bread I'd just taken flying everywhere left me.

"My things!" I burst out, popping up to regret the abrupt action but too excited and tripping the hell out to find not only the things I'd wanted from my hut but items that had gone missing from it, all present and accounted for.

How had he- I- My god, my babbling last night. He'd actually gone and done it— he'd gotten all my shit for me. My hand went to my face and I gasped. Shit. I'd said a lot. I mean, a whole fucking lot! Too much!

Had he- Did he- Rek. I'd told him about Rek. Fuck.

Cursing, I cringed inside and out, thinking of all the things I'd prattled on about. Crap on a dirty assed cracker, the things I'd told him!!!

That fucking pain drink was more like a truth serum!

Like his ears had been burning or something, the front door opened and Kooky stood in the doorway. My mind blanked as he stepped in with a freshly skinned kill over his shoulder, gook and blood and I didn't really want to know what all else clinging to his fur.

"Goot. No more sleepies," he said simply, stepping in and kicking the door shut with his foot behind him to stride right past me and off towards a hall just off to the side from the bathroom.

"Should you really be bringing dead things into your bubby's house?" I called after him, gaping at his retreating form. A bloody trail followed him as he hummed softly to himself.

"Celuk no care," he called back, like last night hadn't happened and everything was just as hunky dory a-okay as it had been before I'd climbed into bed broth-drunk and then spilled my guts to him.

"I sure hope he doesn't," I muttered absently, eyeing that bloody mess all over the thick stone floor I sure as shit wasn't gonna be moppin' up, and started rifling through my things.

A sharp bark of laughter left me as I opened the damaged suitcase with that huge punched hole in it, thanks to Rek, to find my comforter and pillow stuffed inside the freshly cleaned up inside of it. My face reddened as I spied the tell-tale outline of BOB, stuffed inside my pillow case, as well as Rek's pelt peeking out from the bundle.

My pads, cup, clothes, books, chargers, tablet… My god, everything but the ring Rek had jacked was here.

It was on the tip of my tongue to ask how on earth he'd accomplished this herculean task but I was almost afraid to.

Rek must be so damn pissed right now. I mean, flippin' livid.

My lips tipped up into a wicked smile, imagining him getting a taste of his own medicine, and I shook my head. Did that make me evil? To even think of delighting so in his torment?

Meh. Fuzzenstein started it. He had it comin'.

Emerging from the back room covered in more blood and gore, the rich tang of iron clinging to him, he grunted as he walked past, "Stew warm. On fire."

The bathroom door closed behind him and the sound of water trickling pricked my ears.

"I'm to assume you don't mean quite literally on fire but on the fire?!" I sweetly called after him.

"Smarts in the ass," he called back over the sound of water running.

"Hah." A short laugh left me. "Not up in my ass but definitely," I muttered with a small smile.

Shrugging, I stood and walked over to the counter to grab a heat-thick rag and pluck the pot off the fire hook, dished out two big bowls full, to set them at the table and pour another drink and set it at his side. Setting an eating utensil beside each bowl, I then made good on slathering the sweet butter I found in his cold buried box, like an in ground ice chest that worked about as well as any fridge, and slathered up several slices of bread.

By the time Kooky was done washing up, I was halfway through my bowl and working on my second slice of bread.

He grunted his thanks as he walked his towel to a round metal barrel with a wooden lid, and lifted it off to toss his cloth into it. "For soak like blood rags," he said simply, gesturing at it in passing pointedly, to join me.

Aaaand we're not gonna talk about that while I'm eating. Nope. Nuh-uh.

"So… you got my shit for me," I mumbled awkwardly.

"Jes," he said simply.

"I said a lot of things last night." My lips pressed and I found I couldn't hold his gaze for long, dropping it to the spoon-fork thing in my hand.

His grunt in answer as he bit off a large hunk of bread to chew it quietly wasn't really much of an answer.

"You aren't, uh, gonna tell anyone about, you know, any of the shit I said, right?" It felt hot in the room, my throat growing tight. I felt like there was a lump in my throat when I swallowed.

"Pink-kneed swoo-wahr-ed," he rumbled out between bites.

"That's right, you did." My head bobbed along in a short nod. My hand lifted and I waved it off towards the pile of my crap. "I also know where some of that stuff allegedly was… well, I mean, the being it was being held by, I should say, and I have no idea how you could have gotten it without alerting the beings that thought it okay to snatch it from me."

"Distract Rek. Celuk get," he said simply. "Rek stupid. No know yet."

He distracted Rek and Celuk got my things? A team effort kinda thing? "You did?" I blurted, staring up at him, feeling oddly flattered and flustered.

"Need things, jes? Beed less sad, have things." Plowing through his first bowl of stew, he stood for seconds. Spying my nearly empty bowl, he snatched it up and refilled mine as well.

"You, uh, didn't happen to find a necklace with a ring amongst those things, did you?" My gaze fixed on the bowl headed my way and stayed there.

"No ring. Jo need?" he asked casually as he retook his seat and dug into his second helping. There was nothing casual about the intensity of this dude's gaze.

"No. No. Just curious," I said quickly. Truth be told, the longer Rek held onto the ring, the more I thought maybe, somehow, there might still be hope for him, for us, yet. I was a hapless, hopeless idiot when it came to the stupid sock monkey. I loved him, no matter what I tried to tell myself. I couldn't help it. He was my kryptonite.

"Why Rek?"

His question caught me off guard. A cough left me as a chunk of tuber vegetable threatened to go down the wrong tube. "Beg pardon? We're just going to jump right into this shit, right now, are we?"

His large shoulders lifted in a shrug. "Why?" he repeated. He was curious, watching my face for some kind of tell, I felt like. There wasn't a judgy bone in his body about it. Kooky was honest to god, genuinely curious.

Taking a moment to think about it, I admitted, "I get him. I mean, I feel like I do. The bits he actually lets me see, beneath the bullshit, that stuff, I dunno, I like it. I get it. In a way, I see that same kinda walled off person in me, a kindred spirit kind of thing." Frowning, blowing out a long breath, I went on, "We've both been through a lotta shit, and neither of us came out unscathed by it." Swirling my spoon around in my bowl, I figured, fuck it, why not? I've already spilled my guts to him once already. "I can be myself around him and he doesn't go running away screaming. He likes my prickly bits. We're both… broken."

"Goot things," he agreed softly. "But Rek dummy," he rumblingly added.

"He is," I said easily, "but so am I sometimes."

A snort of a laugh left him. "Jo no' dummy. No' like Rek."

A smirk tipped the corner of my mouth. "I'm my own special kind of stupid, there's no denying that, you just haven't witnessed it personally yet. You know, unless tangling with Dougie for funsies counts." I got a laugh out of him for that. "I could tell you some stories that would make the hair fall off your ear tips, bud."

Smothering a smile, he watched as I picked at my bread. "Poop eats stupid," he said suddenly.

Debating on whether I should explain that ish or tease him back, I dipped my bread in my stew and then pointed it at him. "Hey, don't knock it ‘til you've tried it, Lassie." With an overdone wink, I took a huge bite out of my bread.

Kooky almost choked on the big spoonful of stew he'd just stuffed into his fanged maw. "No Lassie. No eats poop," he got out on a barked out laugh.

"Sure I do." Trying to look serious, I ruined it, losing the battle holding back my laughter as he shook his head at the idea.

"Jo no like germs," he pointed out. "No put germs in mouth." Tapping his nose, then his ear, he let me know he was well aware of some of my more obvious eccentricities, were one actually paying that much attention to me, and apparently he has been.

"I could eat poop," I huffed out belligerently. "You don't know me."

Kooky chortled his ass off at the idea.

I kept on. Of course I did. I felt like I had some kind of asinine point to prove. "How would you know? Did you not just say I do? You barely know me, bub. I could totally eat turdlets, Lassie . Isn't that the rumor going around? I'm Poop girl."

"No eats poop. I not Lassie. Lassie dog." He didn't even question it, shaking his head as he mopped up the last of his stew with his bread. Bringing it up was his way of saying it was all bullshit and he knew it, as he has probably assumed many of the other rumors I've cultivated were, so quit fronting.

"How can you be so sure, though? You were pretty fast to tease me about it." My lips pursed and my eyes narrowed, but honestly I was having the most fun I've had in a nice long while just sitting here and having this back and forth with him. I felt like we were on equal footing.

This odd, almost flirty tit for tat, tease you because I can kinda fun made me miss the good times with Rek, my lightly teasing back and forths with Gopher, but this… it was different with Kooky. I felt exposed, for sure, but there was something comforting as I sat here, knowing I'd laid myself bare to him just the either night, all the good the bad, the ugly, and he'd stayed. He was here, sat across from me and teasing me about the Poop girl rumors lightheartedly.

This— I really needed more of it in my life.

"Where Jo go?" Scooting his bowl off to the side of him, he rested his chin in his hands, elbows on the table, and stared at me.

"Thinking. Lost in thought." Tapping the end of his nose with my spoon, I grinned. "Glad you're here for me to torture. Whatever would I do with just lil ol' me for company?"

Licking my spoon, I carefully turned it and waggled it at him. Smiling to myself as he watched me, curious, I balanced it on the tip of his nose, then stood, leaving him sitting there, going cross-eyed trying to eye it, and walked to the sink to put my dishes in the wash bin on the counter behind him.

"Hoh." Standing, spoon still balanced on his nose, he placed his dishes into the bin. His grin made me think of a proud little boy as he pointed at the spoon still dangling from his schnoz.

"Show off," I taunted, turning to walk to my belongings and start rifling through them, to turn at the last moment and poke him in the belly, causing him to softly, "Ack," and drop his spoon.

"Heh." It was impossible not to grin like an idiot but luckily I was facing away from him.

Huffs and puffs sounded from behind me. "Awwww! No faired! Cheetahs!"

Turning to him in surprise, I managed to choke out as I died laughing, "Cheetahs?"

"Cheetahs," he said more insistently, gesturing shortly between us. "Jo cheetahs."

"Cheater," I laughingly corrected, shaking my head at the frown that took over his grumpy mug. "A cheetah is a big jungle cat."

A grunt of an Oh left him as he trailed behind me, then, "What junglal? Rothy say cat small, baby aminal."

"A jungle is like a forest but different, think… forest in a tangle, and usually, like, from what the nature channel has learned me, hot and humid and stuff, but don't go thinkin' to use me like an encyclopedia or some shit. I am not the gal for that." With a shrug, I tossed out, "Try asking Daisy. She likes thinking she knows everything. Cottontail would be in heaven. The Joaniefied version? Jungle cats are huuuuge cats."

With a surprised Hoh of a noise sounding off behind me, I turned around to see what all the fuss was about, to find myself staring at an empty room. "Okee dokily then," I muttered as I got to work sorting through my shit. This was fantastic. All my things, all of them here. My makeup, every last bit, my sewing kit. I could squee with glee.

"Hoh!"

At the Hey, look! noise Kooky made, I made to stand from where I'd parked my ass, halting as my companion motioned for me to stay put.

Odd, home-made looking papers were gathered in his hands. He practically shoved them at me as he plopped his furry ass right down next to me, leaning in so close I could catch the hint of pine and dust of shame clinging to him from his daily hunting adventures. With a louder happy sound, he stuffed the whole wad of papers into my lap.

Pointing to the one on top, a picture of a bunny with a very childlike scrawl on it naming it a cottontail, he pointed to it excitedly. "Co-ton-tay-al," he sounded out, looking very proud of himself.

"These pictures are really good," I commented, enjoying his youthful enthusiasm and not wanting to dim his excitement that he felt he'd found common ground with me. "Did you draw them?" I asked. "Is this your handwriting?"

"No draw. Writes. Rothy teach words." He scooted in even closer, until he was pressed up against my side. Feeling ridiculous that I enjoyed it so much, like I hadn't been getting enough sporadic male attention in this snowmageddon, I squirmed a little in place, if mostly on the inside.

"Doogie draw."

"Doogie, as in your nephew?" I sputtered, incredulous. There was a date on this paper and my math wasn't mathin', time warping through the portal and all that and everything considering.

Shaking his head, he grunted out, "Doogie, Rothy broh-ther."

"Her brother? Dorothy has a brother?" That was news to me. "Did he find himself a furry Lo denaii lady love or something and move with her people?

Again, Kooky shook his head. The excitement of before dimmed as he admitted, "Doogie hunt. Hurt. No gets better. Sick. One day, sleepies, say fine, be good, but no fine. No wake up."

My stomach dropped and I felt positively sick for teasing her about saddling her kid with a name that would get him horribly nicknamed, Oogi silliness or not. She'd named him after her brother she'd lost.

Not knowing what to say, I blurted, "That's horrible. I didn't know. I'm so sorry." Was that why Dorothy had become a healer? To try and help others after what happened to her brother?

Confirming my thoughts, Kooky rumbled out softly after several rough throat clearings, "Doogie good male. Good hooman. Teach trap, skin good, make good pelt long time, huts better. Smart. Goot… Goot fren. Rothy learn help owe-d-cheese. Make hurts better. Like Luka. Hunts in groups. No hoomans hunts no mores." Reaching out, he brushed his fingers along the inside of my wrist. "Too soft. Easy hurt."

Looking flustered, like he'd just had himself a mini spill your guts session and he was suddenly feeling self-conscious about it, he started to collect his papers. Throat working, bobbing thickly, his chest hitched funny.

"And here I just thought you all were a bunch of sexist furballs," I cooed, grinning tauntingly when he gave me a dirty look. It was either hold him while he struggled out of my grip while he cried, insisting on being a man about it, lord help me from the tough guy types, or help distract him.

I'd obviously chosen distraction.

"Wow." My finger tapped the picture below the one of the cottontail, a huge, angry bear looking ready to strike snarling on the page. "That is one merderfurder I don't wanna tangle with."

"No' mowderfordoor. Beh-ur," he grunted out, properly distracted and looking less internally droopy.

"What would you say we have out here that's like one of these bad boys?" I kept on, wishing to see his eyes light up with interest again instead of dimming with remembered sadness.

Getting comfortable once more, he launched into a long explanation about all the no-nos surrounding the village. By the time he was done, I had a healthy admiration of the males knowing full well what all they faced in this wide, wild tundra, and yet they braved it again and again to feed the village, their little families.

Maybe they weren't entirely butthole-ish about how over the top protective they could get. It was a big, bad world out there.

Wondering what he might be like as a father figure, wincing inwardly that my mind would so readily latch onto that, segueing into the mental debate on whether he was just that fucking awesome and I was feeling awestruck, impressed with the male, or if I was just that fucking desperate and doing what I always did, ignoring the obvious in favor of painting someone in a light that went well with my rose colored glasses, I decided my brain was better served on a different track.

Glancing up, blinking, frowning curiously as he spied the dark night sky through the skylight window and I followed his gaze, he exclaimed something in Lo denaii under his breath and shot up.

The papers in my lap flew everywhere, a madcap mess of animal drawings at our feet.

"Where are you off to in such a rush?" I muttered under my breath as I dutifully helped him gather his strewn papers.

"Bebeh," he mumbled absently, shooting up, cramming papers in a messy pile into his arms, to rush down the hall by the bathroom.

Back in moments, he headed right for the table, grabbing up that blackened toast he still had sitting out, a piece of fruit, several tubers, and fresh greens. Before I could blink he was rushing out the door.

Watching him curiously, I stood, grabbed my pelt to drape it over me, and followed him out. Bebeh?

The hall next to the bathroom was long, several rooms spread out along it with doors, many without. I recognized the butchering room the second I passed it, the smell of iron and earth masked by a sweet, but not disgustingly so, floral scent. One quick peek behind the layers of thick hides pinned up over the entryway and I shivered. It was a meat locker, kills hanging on large black hooks, the roughhewn clay colored smooth tiles angling towards the drain in the center of the floor still damp from a rinse off. Overhead, there was one of those exhaust fan looking things, a Lo denaii version, allowing the cold right in. I had no clue how those hides kept all the cold from seeping into the rest of the house. Whatever the deal was, it seemed to be working.

Quickly popping back out, I followed Kooky to the end of the hall and out the heavy back door.

Following the sounds of my new temporary roommate talking softly in his language, I found the beast man cooing at the psychedelic potato-corn that had pulled his sled earlier.

"They're so small compared to the others I've seen," I commented, resisting the urge to reach out and try and pet it. I liked to keep all of my fingers and toes on my person.

A grunting noise leaving my companion had me looking up to meet his gaze as he glanced my way. He was freaking tall, but not freakishly so that I felt like a chipmunk hanging out with Godzilla. "Feed. Bebeh eats," he rumbled out as he took my hand in his, pausing only for a moment as our skin touched, like maybe he was feeling that weird spark that shot through me as the rough pads of his fingers brushed mine, to place a piece of burnt toast into my fingers.

"Of course you get to feed her the fruit and I'm the burnt toast lady," I mock grumbled, even as my hand shook and I forgot how to breathe as he extended our cupped hands.

"Likes," he crooned softly, tucking the rest of what was left of his offerings under his arm to pet his Bebeh while urging them to take the food we were offering.

"Me or the food?" I joked, then jumped, a startled "eep" leaving me as a thick, wet mouth closed over our hands and the overdone toast was quickly gobbled up, sucked into a slobbery maw with what felt like a bisected, maybe even trisected tongue, or multiple tongues that moved in tandem.

"That was so fucking awesome," I whispered, gaping at my ick-gooey hand in astonishment. And also, "Ew." Totally grody, but so freaking awesome.

Kooky let out a deep, rusty chuckle at my emphatic response.

A soft lowing had me reaching out with my free hand, gooey-stickening be damned, to tentatively pet the crazy looking fur-baby's head butting against Kooky's slobber gooped hand. My hand wandered over coarse, dense fur, with a thick layer of softness below the longer layers. It was like puppy silk was hidden under all that longer wild fur. Careful as I went, I tried a little scritch behind the ear, which seemed to please our burnt toast demanding overlord.

"I'm all out of toast, baby. Sorry, toots," I cooed at the beast.

"She likes," Kooky said on a laugh as I found my hand repeatedly, gently but urgently head butted for more scritches.

"Greedy little thing," I tsked softly yet did as she bade. She was too sweet and cute to argue with. Who was I to deny her?

This place has a freaking potato-unicorn and everything! Good luck ever getting me to leave!!

A series of soft chuffs, leading up to a bellow of a low, aimed at Kooky's face while Baby urged me to pet her until my arm fell off, had me cackling like a hyena. "He is so your snack bitch. Isn't he, Baby? Isn't he?" I crooned, getting a loud snort and grunted chuffs from said snack handler in her employ.

"You don't know what that means, do you?" I asked, glancing up at my companion.

"Knowed," he huffed and puffed, though his eyes said, shit no!

Pulling back to watch as he finished offering her the rest of her treats, one at a time, then washed his hands using a pump that fed off a series of large, insulated water barrels that appeared to be used to catch run-off water. Washing out a huge bowl next to refill it using the fat pitcher he'd brought out and laid at his feet until he was ready for it and the water pump, it took him several trips to refill the monster of a potato-corn water bowl.

Noting he set in on a raised contraption with softly glowing orange coal rocks under it, he explained as he spied me watching, "So no freeze."

Making use of the water pump and small oddly shaped chunk of soap next to it to wash my hands, I quickly wiped my hands on my pants and wrapped myself up in my pelt tighter. It was stupid cold out here and coming down hard. Worry nipped at me as I eyed our little friend. "She won't get too cold out here?"

The look Kooky gave me said he was going to swap names with me if I kept that up. How was that kooky?

"Don't look at me like that! She could get cold!" I huffed and puffed, spinning on my heel to march back into the house.

"Bebeh made for cold. Many furries." His chin jerked towards her coat. "Stays warm," he called after me, sounding absolutely fucking baffled by my logic, or lack thereof.

My pink cheeks were out of his line of sight as I stormed into the house in a mock snit, and yet my embarrassed flush remained long after we'd both sealed away inside our castle in the snow.

And this was how our crazy, surprisingly functional friendship/roommate hood kicked off.