Chapter 11

"W e go," Kooky grunted out, walking over to nudge my foot as he passed.

"We? Who is this we you speak of, sir?" I murmured, rifling through the scraps of my old clothes for the right material for the job.

It's been longer than I cared to think about since I'd moved in here. My pop-ins in the village anymore for a quick thing here or there or a visit with Rosa, were fewer and far between lately.

Dodging nosy posies has been easy enough, considering I make it a point to avoid them at any and all costs. The few times I was caught up by Daisy or Red, wondering where the heck I'd poofed out of thin air to, my story remained short and sweet and uniform. My place, along with the other huts for the unmated, were all temporarily out of order. They needed work and until said work was done I was staying at an old friend of Dorothy's place since the rest of Yetidom was currently all full up. Dorothy knew so many folks from the villages scattered throughout around us, near as much as far, it was entirely plausible and typically left without question. Very few wanted to tangle with Dorothy. God, I loved that woman.

"Are you going to walk around with me or drop me off like a child at daycare and rush off to do whatever on earth it is you do all day that I don't care to ask about?" I cooed sweetly.

"Second," he said simply, disappearing down the wide corridor off of the living room like I wasn't being the world's biggest smart aleck.

I'd still yet to venture much around Celuk's closed doors of the thick wooden variety. I had this very real fear if I was ever to snoop I'd be caught shortly after and then shunned from Casa De Awesomeness hence forth, forthwith, however the fuck you say it. Long story short, my ass had no intention of evacuating this castle of my Yetified dreams until I was made to leave.

To be honest, after the first month, I'd stopped asking for updates on the Krampus sitch.

Kooky seemed about as keen as I felt on dancing around that particular convo. Yay us.

We had a good thing going. I jived with the furred grump like nobody's business. We just meshed. Like feck was I about to do something stupid and screw that up.

We were happily lost in our own little world, no negativity allowed, that included grumpy wild wraiths thinking to mark me as an intended target.

The less I knew, hidden away and safe, perhaps it was for the better.

I knew I was totally acting all head in the sand about it but I also trusted Kooky and the others. Hey, I've survived this long.

"Same meet up at dusk? Behind Dorothy's?" I asked.

"Same. Jes," he said simply.

"Right after this chapter," I muttered, licking the tip of my finger, readying to turn the page in the book in my lap. My freshly picked material, along with all of my sewing crap and ongoing, half-finished projects sat in a hefty bag at the end of the couch, calling to me to stop lazing about and get my shit done, and I would soon, one day, I so would, but today was not that day.

My book was plucked from my hands and, despite my protests, he held it up, turning it in his fat mitt of a paw to get a gander at the cover.

"Monster ‘mance." A grunt of approval left him but instead of giving me my book back, the shit head walked over to the shelves already housing several of my books, to place it on the tippity top, where his ass knew damn diddly darn good and well my ass couldn't reach.

"Fine. I'll need twenty." Making sure my hair smacked him as I whipped around and gave a ridiculous hair flip, I put a fuckton of sass into these hips as I saucily sauntered off. Whipping around the corner I'd just disappeared around, I grinned as I informed him, "I've gotta go put my war paint on."

Kooky made a face, wrinkling his nose. "Smells," he muttered.

Batting my lashes at him, I made a noisy air kiss that had the male snorting. "Don't pretend you don't lurve it, fuzzsticles."

With a long suffering sigh, I listened as he muttered about snow covering funny parts of his body and my brilliant observations of the fact.

"You can thank me for the fun nickety names later, Lassie!" I sing songed.

"No see me say Jo… big… boob s," he huffed out under his breath. Whatever else he said, he switched to Lo denaii so I'd have no clue when I burst out laughing and tossed back, "Like melons! And don't you forget it, honey!"

"Take long time, leave Jo ‘hind!" he called out twenty minutes on the dot, I'd bet.

"Leave me and I'll make you wish you'd never met me!" I shot back. Softening my voice, I cooed, "Be a dear and shove all the shit I had set aside in those small wooden dealies you had lying around that I totally confiscated for my own personal use into the basket I wove a few weeks back, would you, fuzz… y-wuzzy?"

Spurts of low rumbled grumblings reached my ears, the sounds of him rummaging around to gather my shit making me grin like an idiot.

"We go, big boobs!" he called out not ten minutes later as a soft thunk sounded, but then grunted and made a weird noise. "No. No sound right," he said not two seconds later, as if to himself.

I was too busy muffling my witch cackles, desperate not to ruin my makeup, to offer a proper comeback.

Kooky gave a little grunt and hopped up from where he'd been sitting on the sofa waiting for me as I entered the room.

"Got a little drool on the corner of your mouth, fuzzsticles," I teased as I strode past. In my soft boots, many times patched up winter coat, a nice, painfully glittery bright set of claws on, and war paint bangin', I felt like a million bucks.

The look Kooky was giving me gave nothing away. As always, I chose to take his emphatic, "Colorsful," as I passed him on my sassy sashay towards the door, as a compliment.

Leaving my shawl, pelt, and clothes from Mystery Mate behind from our very first trek back into town had felt like the right choice to make. I'd be keeping that up until a mate for me was confirmed and my ass was good and caught, whoever the hello their sorry ass ended up being. Until then? I was a single bitch on the loose. Any other way to look at it was like accepting a big fat maybe in a ‘ship, rather sad when I delved into it for too long, and just damn depressing.

There was no ring on this finger or male hanging out properly claiming a gal. I'm free as a bird. Somebody doesn't like it? They can take it up with me.

"Well, Kooky wooky? You comin' or what? Day's-a-wastin', roomie! Get the lead out!" Dancing out the door, I went straight for Baby. Pulling a fruit called a cor out of my purse that was somewhere between an apple and a pear taste wise, as deep a purple as a plum, and shaped like a wrinkled, baseball sized walnut, I held it out to my lil snookywookums in offering.

I was so her favorite. And if I wasn't, I planned to be well before Kooky caught on to my nefarious plans.

I could build a gated area to house her near my hut. She'd love it there!

I was deluding myself. This was her home. She lived here. A gal could dream, though!

"Off to the drop off point, Gerald! So no one is shamed by our unholy, unmatrimony-ed roommate agreement! Tally ho! Onward forth and some shit!"

Kooky raised a single eyebrow daring me to repeat a single word of that nonsense to his face.

Grinning winningly, I laughed.

By the time we'd reached Dorothy's, we were both snort-laughing and Kooky wasn't arguing one bit about being called Gerald.

"Better Jer-hold… Fuzzsticles, Lassie," he admitted, which naturally set me off again.

"See ya at dusk! Happy hunting, Gerald!" I called out as we parted ways. Baby was content to graze on all the tall grass along the back pasture, as I thought of the section of open area off to the side, sitting adjacent to Dorothy and her gang's place.

"Not my sibster," Dougie grumbled out the side of his mouth as the back door swung open and he reluctantly held it open for me.

"I believe your daddy said I'm more of something of an auntie to you," I tossed back with a wink, then shoved the wooden box filled with cookies for his mother at him.

"What this?" he grunted out.

"Poop cookies! My specialty!" I lied.

Chocolate brownie sweet grass cake cookies, as I lovingly called them, were now a favorite of Dorothy's. I had her hooked. I just didn't shape the ones I gave her into little turd nugget shapes. It wasn't exactly like my premade box mix treats mixed with sweet grass of before, but in some ways they were so much better. The beans they grow and grind into a paste or dry out to grind coarsely or into a fine powder, made an excellent tea colored, white chocolate and vanilla tasting substitute.

"Coast clear, Big Lu?" I asked Lukar, who was sitting at the shortened kitchen table, a rounded shape without all those extender pieces in the middle to lengthen it.

"Clear, Leetal Jo." Lukar's hand shot up and he absently tossed me a thumbs up.

Ugh. Dorothy and her mates rocked.

"Toodles," I called quietly, and then hurried to step out.

"Beed safe! No troubles!" Lukar called after me.

"Lil ol' me? Pshaw," I joked, turning to give him an innocent look.

He simply pointed at his nose, then me, effectively calling me out.

Grinning, I laughed, waiting until he looked away to stick my tongue out childishly at Dougie snickering behind him at the end of the hall, one of my brownie bites in his hand, ready to pop it into his treat swindling maw.

"Eat too many and those'll give you the shits, bubby-nephew," I singsonged as I stepped out. "And if that doesn't fudge you up, I find out you didn't save any of those for your mama, you'll be crapping yourself for an entirely different reason!"

"See?! See, Da-ya? She means to me!" Dougie burst out.

"Those Mama's?" Lukar grunted out curtly.

There was a long pause from Dougie that I stopped for, waiting just outside to see what happened next. After a mumbled reply from Douglas, there went that lovely, music to my ears, resounding clap, and Dougie yowled, making it all that much sweeter.

It was a bit of a walk to Rosa's from here, but I had plans for a few short stops on the way.

I was several huts down and debating on whether to pop in at Boog's now or next time when I spotted movement, following the shadow of a being laying in wait for me to walk past.

Feeling myself freeze up, panic trumping my fight response, holding me firmly in place, I was praying for a thaw before the danger was known, when I heard him.

Rek.

So relieved it was my own personal pain in the ass and not a Krampus looking for his hunt pick, I blew out a deep breath and collected myself.

No matter how calm and collected I appeared on the outside, I still had a mini internal jump scare when he popped out from his hiding spot.

"Where Jojoknee go?! Rek looks all overs for you! Rek say where Jojo, no one say! Say hut brokens. No works. Jojo no' home. Where go, hmm? See walks ‘round one day, gone next. Where? Where go Rek no know, no find?" the spicy tempered headache burst out as he shot out from the side of some rando's hut. How did he just spend all his damn time doing that, the waiting to jump out thing, I wondered.

Kooky was a bit of a creature of habit. Of course Rek would eventually catch on to my trips to the village following a pattern.

"Rek say where Jojoknee, Rothy's mates say, Jo fine. Jo safe. Jo good. What Jo need be safe, fine, good from?!"

"Not that it's any of your business," I muttered, glad I'd held back the shocked eep I'd wanted to let out, resisting the urge to pummel him with my purse or the basket of goodies I'd brought along with, I was feeling that generous, "just as I've told you before, I'm staying with a… friend for a while. My hut is temporarily out of use, and until I can make use of it again, I come to town for drop ins. They have a life, you know."

I had to admit, it felt good to hear he cared. Rosa was none the wiser of what I was up to, not that I gave her any clue anything was up. She was a busy mama, and it worked to my advantage. Booger didn't think much of my comings and goings, but we were not codependent on one another either. It wasn't that kinda friendship.

Gopher was the pinch in all of this, but I didn't want to talk about it.

"What friend? Who friend? No smells like friends. Smells like tatocorns. Horned babies, like Jojoknee likes. Jojoknee stays with horny head with tatocorns?" Rek demanded to know.

Stopping mid stride, headed for a weaver, hoping to find someone willing to trade some baked goodies for a good bit of cloth I'd be needing, I gave the male hounding me like a dog with a bone a dirty look. No. That wouldn't do. This needed a firmer touch.

"You lost the right to know any pertinent information about me the second you started trying to trap me," I told him. Lifting my hand, I moved fast, flicking him on the forehead. Rek yowled, clapped his hands to his boo-boo, yet doggedly followed after me.

"Jojoknee no haves male. Bad female. Warriors no want bad female…" I could make out him muttering under his breath.

It pinched, as it always did, but it didn't hurt me nearly as much as it used to. I wasn't a bad female. I had value. I knew a male who thought I was good, and fun, and funny.

"You need a new hobby, bleach-squatch. Joanie's field of fucks is growing pretty barren." My hand lifted and I waved him off over my shoulder.

"Rek's fucks gone. Takes away," Rek groused and bitched quietly, sulking like a toddler, at my back.

"I heard there's a plant like aloe. Go milk it for some self-love goo and have at it, Fuzzenstein. Or, you know, treat all those sore ass burns with it, King Butt Hurt." With that, leaving him sputtering and grumbling in my wake, I smiled and greeted the group of weavers gathered at market, and asked about my proposal.

Disappointment filled me when each and every weaver turned me down. Enthusiasm dimming but still hopeful, I thanked each of them for their time as politely as I could manage and went on my way. Screw it. I'd sacrifice some of my older duds if need be. Between mending my own clothes, a few necessity hand me downs from Dorothy, I was sitting pretty with some clothing items to spare. But still, this was bull crap.

"No deal with no mated female. Think Jojoknee-"

"Would you just shut the hell up with the bad female shit?! For once?!" I burst out, whirling on the green jelly filled dingus. He was still harping on me with this shit, and yet neither of us were reaping the benefits of the other aspect of our relationship because there wasn't one. Not anymore. ARGH.

I was beginning to understand just how trying he came across to others— none of them were getting the good stuff from the idiot on the down low on the side. THIS is what they were getting, a nagging, jealous fishwife you weren't beholden to with Energizer bunny energy and no benefits. My god!

Rek blinked and stared at me, lips parting, green eyes widening in disbelief. His gaze darted about like he was checking to make sure there weren't too many witnesses to my outburst. I just didn't fucking care anymore, not right now.

"Good googly moogly," I ranted on, "you're such a nag! I'm bad! I'm horrible! No one in their right mind would want me!" I railed on, waving my claws about. "We know! WE KNOW! Well, you know what? Somebody- someone is going to see me, think I'm the best fucking thing since sliced bread, and toss a damn pelt around me! And you know what I'm going to say to you, King Douche?! In. Your. Face!"

"Ho! Jo!" Booger called out, lifting his arm up and waving over the milling crowd fluttering from section to section, spotting me in the distance.

Rek was still making spluttering noises, his face turning a funny color. If he didn't start breathing soon I was going to have to smack him one and hope it restarted his brain.

One thwack and the fool blurted, "No dude-shh king! No- No that thing you say! No in face!"

My hand waved, flapping about his face without actually coming into contact with it. "Right. Okay. Whatever. Shh. Mama's gonna have some grownup time now with a big boy who doesn't make her want to snatch them bald."

"Rek snatch Rek bald, Jojo so loud- mean," Rek grumbled, batting my hand away.

"Booger!" I called back, ignoring my ex headache, and reciprocated his Here I am wave.

Leaving Rek to bitch at me, sulk off, follow after me needlessly, you know, wherever the wind may take him, I rushed to catch up to my barbecue sauce chugging buddy. "I'd hug you, big guy, but I know it would get people talking," I greeted him, smirking when he chuffed out a laugh but agreed. Yeah. Didn't want any more of that. "Was it the crazy lady rambling or the shriek screeching that clued you in to my sudden and fabulously timed appearance this fine, sunshiny day?" I joked.

"Shriek," Boog admitted, dead serious.

I laughed, but that laugh cut short when Gopher came barreling around the corner, nearly bulldozing Boog down as he asked him with a wild look in his eyes, "Bauheg see- Find my- Find Jo?" he burst out, to stop dead in his tracks as I peered around Booger's wide form to give him a curious look.

Huh. So he did actually care as to my whereabouts.

"She not gone. She with friend." Rek puffed self-importantly. "No leave to mama and dada's all times, Gobber'd know. Not that Gobber care," Rek huffed and puffed at him.

Blinking, staring stupidly at Rek in shock, I was on the verge of pinching myself to see if I was dreaming this all up when Gopher, as if anticipating my reaction, leaned forward lightening quick and covered my arm protectively.

Goph's eyes met mine, locked, and that shockwave of electricity between us like a live wire sent my skin prickling.

Oh, I totally hit my head and I'm dreaming.

"Go' care," Gopher shot back, baring his teeth at Rek.

"No touch her!" Rek slapped Gopher's hand away.

"Go' touch! Rek no touch! Jo not Rek's!" Gopher slapped Rek's hand back and I swear I couldn't make this shit up, they started slap fighting each other like two pissed off teenage fucking girls.

"Don't. Not today. I'm not doing this today," I warned them.

"No fights," Booger grumbled.

"Rek no fight. Gobber fight," Rek barked, pausing in his slap fight to glare at Gopher accusingly.

"Rek all the times fight. Rek small, stupid," Gopher shot back.

And here we go, I thought, sighing heavily as Rek attempted to tackle Gopher.

"I'd ask if you'd like to ditch them and have a makeup movie night, daylight style, but I forgot my tablet and I've still gotta pop over to Rosa's, get some cousin time and quality auntie-cousin-godmother moments in," I called to Boog over the racket.

"Important cousins, babies times," Booger said simply, nodding along as he spoke. "Next time," he suggested.

"Absolutely," I agreed.

"Gobber has the ass of faces!"

"Rek has shits on him's face!"

"Children. They never do learn," I muttered to myself as I took a small step back and shrugged at the look Boog was giving them. When Boog would have intervened, I shook my head and held him off. "Just let them. They need to learn to get along."

"They kills each other?" Boog grunted out.

"I'll miss the loser dearly? May the victor outrun me ‘cause they're next?" I quipped.

Booger's barked out laughter at my emphatic reply lightened the severity of the situation, cusswords and threats flying in the background notwithstanding.

Ignoring Rek and Gopher's childish antics, I drank in the sight of my reluctant male. I'd missed Gogo boots. It was easy to distract myself from just how much playing house with a hunky Lo denaii that treated me nicely, and constantly reminding myself that Go' had chosen to take off and leave without a word instead of at any point trying to come and seek an audience with me, make any kind of attempt after all that's happened to explain himself, anything.

"I heard you were at your parents'," I said conversationally into the awkward silence that followed.

"Go' see family. See… about… about-"

"Goober stupid," Rek grumbled.

"Stop it or leave," I threatened. I wanted to hear what Gopher had to say for himself. In this moment, at least he was trying.

"Prolly take Rek things from Rek hut, give back to Jojoknee. Kisses all over her butts," the huffy puffy male continued to grumble under his breath.

"I'd say I only have one ass, and yet here you are, driving me up a wall, acting like a second set," I commented dryly.

"Jojo miss Rek," Rek informed them, to an incredulous look from Booger and an amused stare from Gopher.

"Miss headaches?" Gopher asked me, a spark of his old snarky self resurfacing.

Glancing from Rek to Gopher, knowing if I picked sides it would just incite more squabbling, I looked to Boog, "So, I made these for you," I told him, pulling another small wooden container from the basket over my arm to hold it out to him in offering. "I'm sorry I've missed the last bajillion movie nights. It's been hectic."

"What that?" Rek gave a sniff. He tried to lean in closer but Boog bared his teeth at him warningly.

"Koo- Uh. I've been working on some recipes, and this one is so close to barbecue flavored jerky, I thought you might like some. I forget what the beast is called that the meat came from, but it's close, taste wise, to chicken with a hint of beef." Watching Boog lift the lid and pull a strip free to sniff it, groan happily, and then take a huge bite out of it, making yummy noises as he ate, totally made my day. "There's a card pinned to the lid with the recipe I came up with for the sauce, the jerky as well, on it. I know how much you miss barbecue sauce."

"Why give Booger foods? Jojo no likes Boogers," Rek grumbled. Lower, he gave me a dirty look, thick arms folding over his chest, he pouted, "Where Rek treats?"

"Be good," I leaned in to mutter through the side of my mouth, "and maybe it'll be worth my while making you some, you giant puss face."

Rek huffed, affronted, sounding like an old woman, and jerked back.

"Gofur water Jo's garden," Gopher said suddenly, dragging my attention away from the attention hound of Yetidom.

"Thanks," I replied softly, feeling so awkward and unsure with him. He didn't seem keen on mentioning anything that had happened in the way of mating me, and it just made it that much harder to be around him. What was he about to tell me? He went to see his parents about what? About his little problem?

He may not think it unkind to pretend the things that happened never occurred, but it was hurtful to me. Pretending we never were, never attempted to be, chatting it up uncomfortably like this like it never fucking happened, there was a hole in my gut that ached just thinking about it.

"I'd better be going. I'm off to my cousin's. I promised Kehko a play date the next time I was out," I'd started to say.

"Bauheg go Jojoknee. Bauheg see Zhuii," Booger replied, motioning for me to wait for him so he could run back to his place real quick and stash his jerky away.

"Goober not good male," Rek bitched and grumbled, snickering in Gopher's direction. "No claim Jojoknee. No-"

"Would you stop?!" I burst out, slapping at him until he was growling at me and I was ten seconds away from pummeling him with my basket until it broke, treats inside be damned, and then with my purse if no one stopped me before then, I snarled. "Must you be a dick to every-god-damn-one?" I got out between slap happy taps about his person, wherever I could reach. "He has his own shit going on and doesn't need any from you! Leave, him, alone!"

"Jojoknee not his!" Rek caterwauled. "Rek never stops! YOW! No hits face!"

"Then back the bibbity boppity fuck up and get your thick head outta the line of pummeling, you dunderheaded dunce!" I snapped right back.

Rek's eyes flashed and to everyone else he probably looked like he was ready to tackle me like a linebacker. I tensed but not because I thought he was going to ram my ass. I knew better. The fool was ten seconds away from nabbing me up and tossing me over his shoulder caveman style to rush off with me, or scoop me up to him and shut me the fuck up with that talented mouth of his.

Tensing, I shook my head once, a sharp shake nobody else had seemed to pick up on.

Rek was looking like he was about to choose to ignore the warning and do as he pleased, potentially putting us both in a tough spot. I'd poked the bear a wee bit too hard.

A deep, rumbling grumble issued from behind me. Thinking it Gopher, I was more concerned with Rek getting pummeled by him than Gopher trying to break us up.

"It's fine!" I insisted, throwing my hands out, basket hanging off my forearm, my purse dangling precariously over the opposite shoulder. "We're just talking… very loudly!"

When I was lifted bodily by fat hands and hauled up into ginormous arms, Gopher jumped in swinging, a roar erupting from him, popping Rek right in the mouth the second I was safely out of the way.

Freezing up for a minute solid, scrambling as my brain stalled, struggling trying to figure out who the fuck was holding me, I knew I had seriously erred as they made off with me, taking advantage of my brain freeze and the fight stealing everyone else's attention.

"Put me down!" I bellowed the second I snapped out of it, getting snarls from Rek and Gopher in tandem as they beat the tar out of each other, and rolled around in the muddy, snow covered ground.

"Help! I'm being kidnapped!" I caterwauled, channeling my inner Rek as I was hauled off elsewhere. I knew it was Bum-bum holding me as a deep rumble vibrated my back, his heavy grunts, growing louder as he picked up the pace as he moved unmistakable. "He licked me!" I called out over the din, waving at him wildly. "He's a licker! Lock up your wives! Weirdo on the loose!"

I may have totally screwed myself over with some of my previous antics, I now fully realized this, just how much so. But for a few curious glances, no one paid us any mind.

"I'll scream!" I warned.

"No scream," Bum-bum rumbled out quietly, calling my bluff.

He didn't sound all I'll eat you up right now. That was promising. He wasn't so far down the lusty driven Lo denaii hybrid rabbit hole he'd lost himself entirely.

Was he a seasonal horndog and I was convenient, or was this kinda like Gopher's issue but, like, with a twist?

Didn't matter. I was done with big dicked idiots that wouldn't know how to please a woman in all the ways she should be pleased, even if I handed them a manual!

"Alright, fine, then I'll kick your ass," I grumbled, folding my arms over his thick hands as he held me out and away from him like a baby with a stinky diaper.

My legs dangled uselessly in front of me as we walked.

"This hurts my ribs," I lied. I couldn't get a good kick in if he didn't bring me closer. It was my best bet getting him to let me go. Biting him was certainly out of the fucking question. Lesson learned on that front.

Leaning in, he gave a short sniff and proclaimed, "No hurt."

"You don't know that! You don't live my life!" I shot back. Shaking my head, a short, self-deprecating laugh left me. That was as crazy as it sounded.

My hand fell to my neck without thought, rubbing over the spot he'd licked the last time we'd found ourselves alone and unsupervised, headed for compromising positions. Ugh. Why did that make me so fucking hot? No. Bad Joanie.

A funny noise left Bum that had me jerking my hand away and yanking the collar of my jacket up so as not to draw attention to the spot.

"Care to explain yourself or, I dunno, flip my ass around so I can look you in the face while I tear you a new one?" I was feeling as snippy as I sounded. How dare he intrude on my good day with his bullshit!

"No," he grunted out, short, to the point.

"Dick," I muttered, lifting my hand to rest my elbow on his fat fingers, my cheek in my hand.

Swinging my legs back and forth, a small measure of satisfaction filled me each and every time his stride grew just a little too long and he gave a loud grunt as my boot connected with something, or he made a holy crap that was close sound.

"So… do you know Fuck N Run?" My query was met with a small, choking sound.

"What… thing you say?" he finally managed to choke out.

"Fuck N Run. Previously my Cuddle Monster, amongst other generously granted names I've rescinded. You know… the big bad beastie boy with the split personalities who pretended to mate me but then thought better of it. You found me in his hidey hole under a big assed tree out in the middle of fucking nowhere." Holding my hands out, I mimed a biggun with horns. "Yea tall, horns, cuddles like a motherfucker, shy in a very cute way, multiple personalities, treats me like a queen when I'm not worried he's going to brain me for getting adventurous with him with my mouth and worrying him into action thinking I might bite his weiner o-"

"NO!" Bum-bum barked at me, practically tossing me away from him as he dumped me and stumbled back.

Flying through the air, feeling like a fucking cat with its legs thrown out, praying to land on its feet, I tucked and rolled at the last moment, saved by a forgiving pile of that fluffy white stuff and a much softer landing than last time.

"What the fuck?! You know, I'm barely over the bullshit from the last time you tossed me away from you, you oversized… lady tosser!" Fabs, Joans. Fabs. Come up with that all on your own, honey?

Gaining my feet, dusting myself off, pushing aside the state of my pretty basket looking all lopsided where it had tumbled with its burden still neatly tucked up inside of it a few feet away, and advanced on him. "Why did you take off with me like that? You got some kinda weird kidnapping kink I'm not aware of, Hec, huh?" I accused, gesturing between the other side of the village and where he'd carried me off to. Damn, he could move fucking fast.

"No takes. No nappeds. Beed safe," he grunted out, looking like he was struggling not to horn out as emotions threatened.

That was the trigger then? If he grew emotional?

"How did you know where he lived, the male that took me? You are obviously something like him. Some sort of wild beast mashup." My hand lifted and I gave a little wave. "Are you the same? Do you two know each other well? Grew up together? Besties? Brothers? C'mon, fluffy, what's the deal?" I pressed, taking a step closer, and closer to him, until he was sputtering and stammering, stumbling backwards as I slowly closed the distance between us. "What's the sitch, belly scritch? I gotta know."

"No know." The male had stumbled to his ass, wincing as he slammed down to the hard, packed dirt hidden beneath muddied snow piles. He was practically crab-crawling away from me.

"Don't play stupid games with me." Pointing at him accusingly, I shook my finger at him. It dawned on me as I studied the worried expression on his face and he vehemently tried to deny any kind of association with my, well, not-my-mate, pseudo ex, that he'd licked exactly over the marks Fuck N Run had left behind. "Oh my god, you were watching us!" I burst out. My finger waved wildly as my mouth dropped open. "You dirty little perv! You were so watching us!" But how?

"No watch," Bum-bum grunted out.

"Then how did you know where FNR left a mark on me, a mark that disappeared?!" Reshouldering my purse, glancing at my basket briefly, my hands slapped to my hips and my foot started tapping. "Well, snoopy-poopy, I'm waiting?"

Sitting up, rubbing at his arm like his elbow hurt from his fall, he glanced down at his enormous feet and gave a few grunts. "Sensitive," he said finally.

"Your elbow?" I blurted, resisting the urge to go to his big baby ass and coddle him.

"Sensitive. Sense marks," he grunted out haltingly.

My hand went to my neck again, my fingers slipping inside my coat, under my shirt, to gently rub the spot. Shivering, I jerked my hand back abruptly. He wasn't kidding. I'd never noticed until I started to trace over parts of the area, hitting just the right spots.

A deep rumble issued from him, his eyes getting a look I recognized.

"Nope. None of that," I warned, clapping my hands loudly, reassured when he let out a sharp noise and then looked less hypnotized by tinglies induced by mark touching smells, and more himself. "This isn't how we work," I lectured him, gesturing between us. "I'm the one that piques your curiosity but unsettles you, and then you go running off from me like I'm the most disgusting thing you've ever had to deal with in your life."

"No think Joadknee ‘gusting," he rumbled out softly.

"Can the others smell it, sense it, whatever, my mark?" I asked quickly. "The other Lo denaii?"

Frowning, Bum-bum shook his head. Well, that was a relief.

A small, self-deprecating laugh left me. "The thought of pretending to be my courter had you ready to chuck me into the river. That's not something I'd easily forget." Rolling my eyes, I decided it was time to wash my hands of this weirdness and be on my way. I'd pop by Booger's later if I didn't catch him at Rosa's, if it wasn't time to go, and tell him what all went down. The Boogster was chill with shit like this, I'd like to think, because he knew I could handle myself in many a situation, or perhaps he was simply aware that he was no match for Bum-bum.

"No mean… hurded Joadknee," he said softly in response, so softly I'd almost have missed it.

"It was a stupid idea. Impulsive on my part." Collecting my basket, I was all set to take off but I kept hesitating. "I just- I want to know why he didn't want me. I need to see him again and ask him face to face. I want closure. I need to know… what I did wrong."

"No thing wrong Joadknee," Bum-bum grunted out, sounding choked up.

Maybe that was a bit more truth than he'd been expecting from me. Whatever. I was in a new era. This was my Glamazonian year. I would own this fucking bitch!

Waffling, to leave or not to just take off and leave, I pulled one of my wooden boxes free, the one I'd been saving for my lil ol' self, a bit of everything I liked in there, and set it down on the ground a short distance away from him. "Take it or don't but don't read into it. This has nothing to do with you momentarily losing your mind during Krampy season or whatever and licking me. I heard some of the hybrids can tend towards super frisky during certain times of the year. I was near and you had a momentary brain fart. I just had an extra box and I'm giving it to you like a peace offering. No big," I muttered, then took my leave. "Go back to looking at me like I'm insane but you're still willing to tolerate me, and coming to my rescue in the 11th hour and all that, business as usual, everything will be peachy."

"Jo… hurd?" he called after me.

"Now why would you go and ask a silly thing like that?" I tsked, adding more hips-swinging swish to my walk as I sauntered off, like I didn't have a single care in the world or fuck to give.

"Smells hurd," he rumblingly replied.

"It's good for me." My hand lifted and I tapped my head. "This thing won't get so big it pops off and floats away."

Right as I was about to turn a corner and disappear out of sight, I dared a peek over my shoulder. Bum-bum was nowhere to be found. Neither was the wooden box. My lips tipped up as I carried on. I felt like my heart smiled, silly as that sounded, as I headed straight for Rosa's.