38. Chapter 36 Zorvan

Chapter thirty-eight

Chapter 36: Zorvan

A s she shoulders past me, her eyes find mine, and she scowls. There's more fire in her than there was before she left, and she was already feisty. Whatever happened to her in Solardin, broke her down and built her back up into an even more powerful woman.

Of course she's strong. She's my mate. No she's not , I remind myself. I broke the bond, but my dragon didn't get the memo. As far as he's concerned, she still belongs to us.

I want to approach; to beg her forgiveness. But something is holding me back. My hesitation isn't just from my pride, but out of fear. The fear of rejection, the fear of Arden hating me, and the fear of what she's been through are holding me back. We still have to sort out the issues with her uncle and her father. What if we just aren't compatible?

I don't know what I expected when she returned, but anger was not it. I didn't think she'd fall into my arms, but I thought she'd at least be happy to see me. She didn't even seem happy to see Livarius.

She looks thin, and worn down. Her normally shiny brown hair is dull and tangled. Her lips are dry and cracked, and she looks exhausted. She had to weather her first shift—into her dragon —alone, after the terrors of whatever happened in Solardin. It's no wonder she hates me. After all, even I hate me.

Arden leaves the infirmary, to go get a bath. Once I've secured transportation for Emyth up to Arden's room, I head to the kitchens.

I pause at the door. Helena, Jobie, and Tara haven't spoken to me since Arden was taken except to yell at me when it first happened. I let all of them down by not only allowing her to get taken, but by sending her away in the first place.

I steel my nerves and open the door.

Helena glances up from where she's working on chopping some vegetables, and scowls at me. "What do you want?"

"I wasn't sure if you had heard the news, yet, but Arden is back."

Helena drops her knife on the counter and looks me in the eye for the first time in over a month. She frowns and tears form in her eyes. "You better not be toying with me."

"I'm not. I swear it."

"She's really back?"

"She's really back."

"Wait here!" she says and she hurries off into the pantry. She brings out a small box of the pies that Arden loves so much. "I have been making a batch of these every day in hopes that she would come home. Please take these to her."

"I will. Can you bring dinner up to her room for the eight of us in about an hour? I know it's late and you're working on prep for tomorrow, but she needs to eat. She lost a lot of weight in the weeks she's been gone."

"Anything for her. I'll make all her favorites," Helena promises and she goes back to her work.

I move to leave and she calls out, "Prince Zorvan, If you let her go again, you'll have a rebellion on your hands."

"Don't worry. She's home for good," I say on my way out the door.

A few minutes later I find myself standing awkwardly outside of Arden's room. I have never once felt unsure of myself before now. Arden is mine. That I'm sure of. I just have to hope that I didn't irrevocably damage any chance we had at happiness.

Taking a deep breath, I open the door. The guys are splayed out around her room. Lysander is of course cuddled up with Emyth on the bed, Tavin is sitting on the floor by the window, Jarrah is sitting at the end of the bed, and Livarius is in the chair in the corner. I can't help but notice Camus' absence.

"He's in the bathroom with her?" I ask vaguely.

"Of course he is," Livarius snaps.

As hard as this is on the rest of us, I know it's worse for him. He's had such a rough go of it. We still haven't found his mother and sister, and I honestly am scared about what we'll find when we do locate them. Nevidian's involvement still needs to be addressed. Speaking of which …

"Have Nev or Rupert been up to see Arden since she returned?"

"No. I saw Rupert out the window, but he was on his way to his cottage. Should we go invite him up?"

"No. I think we need to have some discussions about things first. If we invite him up, it'll turn into a thing, and I want to get some stuff out in the open with Arden."

The sounds of grunts and groans can be heard in the bathroom. The realization that Camus is in there fucking our mate falls over all of us at the same time.

"I'll fucking kill him," Jarrah says and moves toward the door. I put my hand on his chest and stop him.

"I know that it's hard, but we need to adjust. What's done is done, and Arden is mated to him now."

"Which never would have fucking happened if you hadn't sent her away!" he yells in my face.

"A fact that is not lost on me. But according to her they are fate bound, so they would have found each other eventually. Likely when Cyndair came for Iona's trial. She needs him right now more than she needs any of us," I say and make eye contact with all of them except Emyth who is still sound asleep.

Arden cries out, apparently reaching orgasm and I dig my nails into the palm of my hand, stopping myself from barging into the bathroom and killing Camus myself. After a couple of minutes Arden and Camus make their way out of the bathroom both wrapped in towels. Arden ignores all of us completely and goes into her closet.

Camus glances around at all of us before his eyes land on Tavin. "You. You're the closest to my build. May I borrow some clothes? Mine all got rather filthy on the journey."

Tavin grinds his teeth together and doesn't answer.

"Well if you prefer I can just walk around naked," he says and drops his towel to the floor. "I think Arden prefers it that way anyway."

She steps out of the closet in a dress that I know Blevora didn't make for her. It's one that would have been too small for her when she first arrived in Sangaris. I stroll up to her and place the box of pies in her hands.

"You need to eat. They didn't feed you enough while you were gone."

She opens it and her gaze drops to the hand pies. She stares at them for long seconds, then her shoulders sag as she lets out a sob. The poise and strength that she's been leaning on are gone, and in their place is a glimpse of the sweet vulnerable girl that I first met in the earth realm. Sangaris has hardened her. I have hardened her.

I clear my throat awkwardly and say, "Helena said she's been making them for you religiously since you left, so they were just made today." I scrub the back of my neck with my hand. "Normally I would scold her for using resources on something like that, but all things considered, I'm glad that she did it."

"Me too," she whispers. She glances at Camus and then does a double take. "Why are you naked?"

"No one wanted to give me any clothes," he says with a shrug, like standing around without clothing was a perfectly acceptable response to not having access to what he needed.

"Well get dressed. Or at least put your towel back on. You're too distracting like that," Arden says, tears still glistening on her cheeks.

"Ready to go again already, love? Maybe the rest of your mates could join in this time." He steps into her space and kisses her softly, showing her a surprising tenderness.

I've heard stories about the vampire. He's just as cold and calculating as his sister; maybe moreso. Seeing him treat Arden with so much love and affection floods me with guilt. I could have been that for her. Instead I chose to treat her like trash to try to spare my own feelings.

"Someone get him some clothes before Arden jumps him again," Lysander insists.

"I have more self control than that," Arden insists. But judging by the way she smells, and the way she's looking at him, she is in fact ready to go again. "I think."

Tavin growls then leaves. He returns a short while later and chucks a pair of pants and a shirt at Camus.

"What? Not sharing underwear?" Camus asks with a devilish grin. "Or is my little brother the only one allowed in your pants."

Livarius' eyes go black, and he moves across the room toward Camus with lightning speed. Arden steps between them. "Enough. Both of you. Livarius, go sit down. Camus, stop instigating."

Camus makes an irritated sound. "What fun is it being here if I can't stir up a little trouble?"

Arden faces him. "We have more important things to deal with right now."

She pulls a hand pie out of the box and gives a quiet ‘thank you' over her shoulder in my direction before sitting on the bed next to Emyth. Camus pulls Tavin's clothes on, and sits next to her. The rest of us take up space around the room.

"Are we going down to the dining hall?" Arden asks.

"No. I asked Helena to bring our meals up here. I wanted this to be as private as possible since it's highly sensitive."

Arden nods. "I just want to make a rule right now, no one is allowed to ask how I'm doing, or what happened while I was there. I'm not ready to talk about it. I may never be ready to talk about it. And all that matters is that I'm here now, and we have a lot of work to do."

I can tell the others are just as hesitant as I am. I need to know what happened to her and how she was able to survive it. I need to know how much I need to punish myself before I can allow myself to simply exist around her without guilt flooding every fiber of my being. I need to know who I need to kill so they can never share the same air that she does, again.

"I'm not talking about any of it until I'm sure none of you will pester me about it," she says.

"Fine," I agree reluctantly. "But you need to talk to someone about it. Even if it's Rupert, or Airen. Hell, you can even talk to Nev about it. He needs an awakening about the person he's been serving anyway."

"Where are they, anyway?" Arden asks. "I expected them to be practically busting down the door to see me."

"I suspect Rupert assumed that you would want some time with us. He knows what it's like to be fated to someone," Lysander says. "He probably expected us all to fall into bed together."

"Which is kind of what I was hoping for if I'm being honest," Jarrah mutters. "Instead of hearing you fuck your new mate in the bathroom."

Arden shoots him a look that shuts him up. "I know you're all upset about Camus being here, but I will not apologize for it. We had a rocky start, but I have come to care for him, and I think you'll all grow to like him as well. Besides, he has insider knowledge of Solardin that we could really use, and he is more agreeable when he isn't being treated like scum."

"You'll forgive me if I'm not quick to trust someone who is not only from the kingdom who has been kidnapping our people, but also is the son of Falmir. That entire family has betrayed you or tried to harm you in some way," Jarrah growls.

"Even you, little brother?" Camus asks Livarius who goes scarlet.

"It's a long story," Livarius mutters under his breath.

"We are so far away from the conversation I wanted to be having," Arden says, rubbing her temples.

"So let's get into it," I say.

Arden nods, and sucks in a deep breath. "Cyndair is an evil bitch is what it all boils down to. It's even worse than you expected. Not only are the women being used for sex, but they're being turned into breeding stock. They're impregnating the shifters with vampire babies to try to create fucking hybrids. And because she found out about my bloodlines, she thought breeding me with a vampire would result in a powerful heir that could help her rule the entire realm. So she tried to whore me out to her more powerful descendants."

"She did what?" I snarl.

"I'm not going into detail about that. But that was her plan from the very start. She needs to be stopped. I just don't know how we can possibly expect to accomplish that. She's ancient and cunning. Even with two dragons and my great grandfather–assuming he would even help us…"

"We would have to be really smart about it. We can't attack her here," Jarrah says.

"If we could manage to get my dad back, we could have a third dragon…" Arden says, confidently.

She's testing me, and my resolve to make things right. But this is one thing I can't allow.

"No. I'm willing to stop my pursuit of him. I'm content allowing him to rot in the hunter's prison. I'm not rescuing him."

The Keeper's all stare at me in shock. I haven't discussed this with them at all.

"That's it? All these decades and you're just…giving up?" Arden asks in disbelief.

"I'm compromising."

"What if I told you I could change your mind, and open you up to the idea of saving him?" Camus asks.

"I highly doubt that," Livarius says with a laugh. "Your arrogance is no match for Zorvan's stubbornness."

I shoot him a dirty look and he just smiles back at me. He's like the little brother I never had and never wanted.

"We'll see," Camus says. "Nuvian wasn't responsible for your parents' deaths."

"You're just lying for your mate," I insist. "Did she put you up to this? Is this your way of trying to get back at me?" I ask, shifting my gaze to Arden.

The air is tense. No one even moves, let alone speaks.

"You think that I would be so cruel as to have him lie to you about your parents' murders? You have got to be kidding me. Administer the truth serum—"

"Hey!" Camus interrupts, and Arden ignores him.

"I wouldn't let him lie about something like this. And if you think that low of me..."

I grind my teeth together. There's no way that I've hated the wrong man for all these years. "Then who was responsible?"

"My father was," Camus says. "Woo! Feels good to get that off my chest. So when do we kill him?"

"What proof do you have?" Jarrah asks, ever the strategist.

"I was there with my grandmother when he told her how easy it had been to do it—how they didn't suspect a thing."

I head for the door, and Jarrah grabs my arm. "Where are you going?"

"To kill Falmir."

"That wouldn't accomplish anything," Jarrah says.

"If you kill him now, Cyndair will have reason to launch an attack against you. I suspect that may have been her plan all along," Arden says.

"Sacrifice her own son? To what end?" Livarius asks.

"One thing about our grandmother is that she plays her cards close to the vest. She never divulges all the information to one person, so I don't have all the details. What I can deduce is that she has been planning to take over the entire realm for centuries.

"Killing your parents and framing Nuvian was the quickest, easiest way to eliminate all of the dragons, save for you and your sisters."

Rage burns inside of me, and I spin and slam my fist against the wall, plowing a hole into the plaster. I want to go down to the dungeon and eviscerate Falmir, but the others are right. He was on my council, but he is not one of my subjects. He still belongs to the Solardin kingdom. His trial requires a leader of his home kingdom to be present to ensure that he is treated fairly.

My dragon is demanding to be let out, to avenge my parents. The dragons of old, the non shifters, were solitary creatures, but we shifters crave a pack—a family. And everything that has happened over the last century has isolated me from everyone I care about—even my keepers. Hanging my head, I suck in deep heaving breaths, trying to settle before my dragon takes over without my permission.

A gentle hand makes contact with my forearm, and immediate calm falls over me. It's Arden. I don't even need to look up to know.

"We'll fix it," she says. "After everything that Cyndair has done to both our families...she has to pay."

I slowly turn my head to look at her. There's resolve in her eyes, and the hardness has returned. She wants Cyndair dead. Arden wouldn't have harmed an insect when she first arrived.

"You've changed a great deal since we brought you here."

"I've had to."

I reach out to put my hand on her cheek, but stop short. "Just don't let any of this snuff out your kindness. It's your best quality."

"You didn't seem to think my kindness was a good quality before," she says.

"I never said that. I just said your kindness and your trusting nature were going to get you killed."

She lets out a humorless laugh. "It would have been better if it had got me killed."

A growl rumbles in my chest. "Don't ever say that again."

"Why? You don't even want me here. You sent me away. You...You broke the bond. I'm honestly surprised that you even let me back in the castle—that you didn't kill me on the spot."

Her words hurt. The fact that she thinks that I want her dead makes me realize just how horribly I've messed everything up. I don't even know how to start to explain how I'm feeling to her.

"Spend some time with your mates. Stay close to Emyth, and get some rest. We have a little time before Cyndair's visit."

She gives me a sad smile, and nods. The way she looks at me tells me that it may not be too late for us. There may be just enough there that we can repair it and build something new together. But I won't get my hopes up just yet.

"Will Camus be permanently staying here with you, or in his own quarters? I can have another room prepared for him."

She glances over her shoulder at Camus. "Prepare a room for him. He'll likely stay in here, but I may need a little space from time to time."

"Whatever you need. I'll send someone up to repair the wall tomorrow." I pause, and sigh. "I'm glad you're back, Arden."

And I take my leave.