5. Asher

ASHER

I pushed myself to run as fast as I could through the forest, the image of Phaedra still burning in my mind. She was a vision, as she always was. Her golden blonde hair lifted in the breeze, and even in this form, my body tingled with the urge to return to my human form, go to her, and gently push it out of her face.

My wolf was going to push me to do just that, just to feel her hands in my fur, but I couldn't allow it. I'd turned away from her before the impulse became too much to ignore and sprinted into the forest to chase away that desire.

I missed her so much, I felt like I was going insane. Getting to see her at all was a gift, but seeing her at all shouldn't be possible. Because of my failure, she was stuck on this fucking island, shackled to Connor's side. She belonged on the mainland, free of high-wolf society, of Connor. Free of me.

But she was here. Trapped, like I was, like my pack was. It was up to me to make this right. No matter how much I wanted to be close to her, it wasn't my place to be at her side anymore. Without the fated mate marks, our bond was broken. I wasn't hers, and she wasn't mine. Not anymore.

It hurt not being near her, and it hurt even worse turning away from her the way I had, but I had an unexpected opportunity tonight. The guards weren't watching me, and I had to take advantage of it, even if I didn't know why they were being so lax.

Inside the shed, still a wolf, I howled at a specific cadence—one Taig and Garrett would recognize as me calling for them. I was still their alpha, but maybe… maybe that should change. Before I made that decision, I needed them here.

I didn't know where they were, but they probably needed to sneak away. It took them about an hour to do that, and when I scented them on the air, I stepped out of my shed. They were in their wolf forms. My uncle's wolf looked a lot like mine, but his was larger and a darker gray, whereas Taig's matched me in size but was a dark brown. At least the itch of not being able to shift wasn't constant. When Connor wasn't around, we could shift into either form.

Garrett and Taig followed me into the Wilcox Forest, and when I felt we were safely out of sight of the manor, we shifted so we could speak. I didn't like how exhausted the two of them looked, but at least they weren't covered in scratches or bruises.

"Where are you all being held?" I asked. "How did you get away?"

"In here," Taig said, his arms crossed. "We've been forced to camp out in a clearing while Connor figures out what he wants to do with us. Normally, it would be nearly impossible to sneak away without a distraction of some kind, but there were less people guarding us today."

So, the guards weren't being lax just around me. "Have you eaten?"

"They've been giving us stale bread and jerky. We've been giving most of our share to the elderly, women, and children."

I nodded. It was what I would expect from my men. "How is the pack?"

"We're holding up," Garrett said. "Wilcox guards are watching us. Morale is low, but we're keeping everyone sane."

"I really appreciate your hard work," I said. "Truly. I don't know where I would be without you two holding down the fort."

"As if you would do anything different if you had access to the pack," Taig said. "An alpha isn't meant to be so far away from his people. This can't be easy on you."

I'd tried not to let it get to me, but Taig stating it out loud made me acknowledge the tension between my shoulders and in my neck. I'd never been away from my pack for so long.

"I'll be fine," I said. "Worry about the pack, not me."

They exchanged a look, and Garrett gave a scoffing laugh as Taig rolled his eyes.

"Easier said than done, Asher," my uncle said. "Everyone has been asking about you."

Their concern warmed me. But would that concern remain once they knew what their alpha had been reduced to?

"And like us," Taig said, "they've been wondering what happened. Connor's guards told us you killed Edgar."

I shook my head. "Connor killed him."

They gaped at me. Even my uncle wasn't sure how to respond. I told them everything—that I found Edgar when I snuck in after Phaedra gave me the directions to the secret entrance, that I fought Edgar, that he revealed the truth about his relation to my mother, but the scent of Phaedra's blood pulled me away. I wanted to be honest with them about everything, including the fact I had gone to Phaedra instead of fulfilling my duty to my pack. Finally, I told them about Connor attacking Edgar.

My uncle let out a low breath and shook his head. "Patricide. No father ever prepares for the ultimate betrayal by their son, I hate to admit it, but clearly that was the best move for Connor."

"Fuck Connor," Taig said, his hands clenched at his sides. "I'm stuck on the fact that you share blood with the Salcedos." He turned toward my uncle. "Did William never mention who Evelyn was related to?"

He shook his head. "No, but I'm not surprised. When he brought her to the pack the first time, he told us that she was escaping her family on the mainland. I'd never believed that, but he wouldn't tell me the truth no matter how many times I asked him."

I sighed. "Yet another one of my father's secrets. Nothing to be done about it now."

"I'm glad to see you're doing well despite all this," Garrett said. "We were worried the fucker was torturing you."

"Thus far, his abuse has been mostly psychological," I said.

"Meaning?" Taig asked.

I didn't really feel like getting into the way Connor paraded me in front of high-wolf society and emasculated me in front of the woman I was still very much in love with. I'd been honest enough for one night, and there was still more I needed to say.

"Never mind that for now," I said. "We should discuss my stepping down as alpha and letting one of you take my place."

"What the hell are you talking about?" Garrett demanded.

Taig barked, "You will do no such thing."

Their quick, negative reactions surprised me. "Isn't it fairly obvious that should happen? I have failed my people again and landed us in this position."

"This is a collective problem," my uncle said, staring fiercely into my eyes. "It's not solely your fault. Asher, you are a victim of terrible circumstances. You inherited a pack that was in a terrible situation because of your father's actions, but no one in the pack tried to challenge him. You can't give up now. You can do this."

Taig nodded. "If there's one good thing that can be said for Connor taking control of the curse, it's that none of us have felt so clearheaded in years. And with this clarity, we've all realized the toll the curse has taken on us as a pack. You shouldered this burden largely on your own. None of us were there for you the way we should have been. We all believed Selene was the key to saving the pack, and we put your alliance with her over your own happiness."

My uncle patted my shoulder. "You are the strongest of us, Asher. Even now, you're thinking of what's best for us while you're so far away. Neither Taig nor I could possibly try and fill your role."

"Asher, you're the only one who can get us out of all this."

I stared at them, pressure building behind my eyes. They still believed in me. Despite everything. I didn't feel like I deserved it, but I would do everything I needed to do to prove myself to them.

"Thank you," I said. "I promise you here and now that I will save us, even if it costs me my life." Even though it meant I had to let go of my love for Phaedra. I didn't regret choosing her instead of killing Edgar, even now, but I couldn't allow myself to make that choice again. No matter how much it hurt me or my wolf to turn away from her, my pack had to be my one and only priority from now on.

Right as I finished that thought, I felt a sudden tugging inside my body, like a force pulling on my bones. Connor.

"The only question now is to figure out how to take Connor down," Garrett said.

"We'll talk about that the next time we meet," I said. "Connor's calling me."

They nodded, and then we shifted. They returned to the pack as I ran to the manor. I slunk up the steps and used my head to push through the door. The guards assigned to watch me were waiting for me. Connor was there as well, but again, Randall was not.

"Put those scraps on, mutt," he said, tossing clothes at me. "I have work for you to do."

I shifted and caught the thin, black pants and white shirt. As I dressed, I looked around the grand foyer of the Salcedo manor. It was gilded, with smooth white marble floors and large portraits hanging from the walls. The past alphas of the Wilcox pack glowered down at us.

"Follow me," he said, and led me farther into the manor toward a blank section of the wall. A large portrait of Connor was leaning against it. Like the others, it was elaborate and masterfully painted, depicting Connor in a royal blue suit and a burgundy cape in his human form, with his wolf sitting at his feet. The artist had made Connor look far more imposing than he was in person.

Raising an eyebrow, I looked from the portrait to Connor. "I'd recommend getting a more accurate portrait done."

It was a pretty light jab, but it seemed he was a little self-conscious because he took a step toward me. "I wasn't asking your opinion, you idiot," he snapped. "What could you possibly know about art?"

I sighed. "Then, what am I doing here?"

"I'm alpha of the Wilcox pack. It's time we added my portrait. I have servants who put these up for me, but where's the fun in that?" He gave me a sharp-toothed grin. "You're going to put it up for me."

I closed my eyes briefly and opened them. This was a complete waste of time but not unexpected. The portrait was the height of a person, and the bronze frame would be a pain to lift. Of course Connor would make me do something tedious and unnecessary. He was a spoiled, pampered child with a chip on his shoulder almost the size of this painting. Why did I expect he'd behave any other way?

I sighed.

"Got something to say, mutt?" Connor demanded.

"I was just thinking that this sort of pointless chore is exactly the kind of thing someone like you would think of."

"What do you mean, someone like me?"

"You don't know? I think it's pretty obvious to everyone else."

His lips pulled away from his teeth. "Then why don't you spell it out for me, mutt?"

"You're a spoiled fool who has more power than you know what to do with."

His eyes narrowed, and I saw the muscles in his jaw tensing.

It wasn't a good idea to antagonize him further, but I was still feeling good knowing that my pack still believed in me. Riding the high, I said, "You're lucky you have this power over me. Everyone knows in a fair fight I'd kick your ass."

Connor glared at me, and for a moment, I thought he would actually take me up on my challenge, but then he turned away.

"I don't have to take this shit from someone so beneath me. I have other things to focus on. Like my mate."

Fire ignited in my stomach. "Stay away from her," I said before I could stop myself.

He smirked because he knew he'd poked me where it hurt. "I expected you would say that, mutt."

I was a little surprised Connor wasn't giving into my taunting more. It was actually a little concerning considering how much of a hot head he could be. He had the upper hand with my pack, my shifting, and Phaedra under his control.

"Have fun getting that portrait onto the wall, Asher," he said as he strode away. "Don't hurt yourself."

I seethed with hatred as I hefted the bulky portrait. I had to figure out how to kill him as quickly as possible before he got better at all this. The guy was dangerous, and he'd only become more dangerous if I continued to antagonize him.