18. Asher

ASHER

S elene returned to my territory on Wednesday afternoon to find a solution to our ruined mating plans. When she arrived, she didn't look happy to be there, and she refused to take the seat I offered her.

"I wanted to talk through the new terms of our merger," I told her. I wanted to get to the point right away for both our sakes. "I'll make sure your people are given double their rations as long as you continue to supply us with your men."

She crossed her arms. "I have more than soldiers to worry about, Asher. Giving us more food won't solve all my problems."

I stared at her. Gone was the polite woman who was always quick to smile even when things looked bleak. Now I was looking at the woman who hadn't hesitated to kill the previous Coldcrow alpha for the position.

That didn't bode well for me or my pack. Selene was pulling back and eliminating all pretense of good will. Our deal was on shaky, maybe even nonexistent ground, and my people knew how tenuous things were. There was growing animosity within my pack, and with animosity came emotional outbursts.

The potential to become feral was in every member of the Dagger pack. With only a week before Connor's ascension, we were all on edge, waiting to see which of us would go feral next. Honestly, even I was tempted by the idea of leaving these politics behind and letting myself sink into savagery. But if I did that, I'd be dooming the rest of my pack to the same fate… and I would never see Phaedra again.

I sighed, not bothering to hide my desperation and exhaustion from Selene. She knew the stakes. "Is there nothing I can do to save this alliance?"

"Well," she said, biting the inside of her cheek. "There is one thing."

Before I could ask what it was, she was in front of me. She leaned in close, quickly closing the distance between us, but I caught her shoulders before her lips could touch mine and pushed her gently but firmly away.

"I'm sorry," I said, and I meant it. "But my feelings for Phaedra haven't changed."

Selene stared at me, hurt and anger warring for dominance on her face. After a few moments, she started to laugh and turned away from me, toward the door.

"Asher, let me inform you of how I feel in terms you'll be able to understand." In moments, her tanned skin was replaced with her wolf's thick, black fur. Her wolf lunged at me, her paws on my shoulders. Her dark eyes bored into mine, and in them, I read the extent of her rage.

My uncle, hearing the commotion, burst into the room, but Selene had already dropped down to all fours. Growling with discontent, she stalked out of the room, abandoning the scraps that remained of her clothes.

"You okay?" my uncle asked.

"Yeah." I smoothed down my shirt. "She wasn't attacking me so much as giving me a warning." You're going to regret this. That's what she had conveyed in the way that I, a cursed shifter, would understand. Low, but I deserved it, didn't I?

I sank into the seat and pushed my hands through my hair. Garrett sighed and sat across from me.

"This is a disaster," he said. "I've never questioned you about anything, Asher, but you must know now that you're making a huge mistake."

Now I was the one growling. I felt my wolf near the surface as I glared at him.

"What am I supposed to do, Uncle Garrett? I mean, really." I thrust out my right wrist. "Look at this. Shifter legends tell us that this thing is supposed to be unbreakable. I am bound to Phaedra, and the bond is so strong that I am incapable of fighting it."

My uncle looked from my wrist and back to me. His expression wasn't so frustrated anymore, just sympathetic. "But you were supposed to be bound to Selene. That predates the mark. You were supposed to make this work for the pack."

"I know. Believe me, I'm painfully aware of what is at stake." I hated that I was complaining about this, but the rant had started, and my emotions were raw. I couldn't stop it even if I wanted to. "But that's what none of you understand. I have fought this thing as hard as I can, but at the end of the day, it is impossible for me not to miss Phaedra. I want her by my side so badly it is a physical ache. I would die for her if she asked me to. Yet I'm meant to try and mate another woman?" I shook my head. "The gods may as well kill me now."

Garrett took in my words, and his shoulders slumped. "Then, maybe this was one last curse from Holo. One none of us were aware of."

"Phaedra is not a curse." I pushed out of my seat and stormed out of the room. I needed some air, but more than that, I needed some time away from the hostility in my pack.

I needed my mate.

I knew my alliance with the Coldcrow pack was crumbling, but at least I was completely certain I was ready to take my relationship with Phaedra to the next level. I wasn't worried about falling too deep for her. If the past few days were any indication, I already had.

But I wasn't as scared of that as I used to be. Love wasn't a thing to fear.

Besides, I wanted Phaedra to share my life—pack and all. I wanted the others to see I could never be with Selene now. Phaedra and I still needed to come up with some way to get me inside the alpha manor, but there was no reason I couldn't introduce her to my pack in the meantime.

Thinking of her laugh, her smile, set my mind more at ease. I enjoyed her company so much I had no doubt my pack would love her, too.

I called for a meeting in the center of the spiral. My people slowly assembled, each of them reluctant to stop what they were doing.

"Hello, everyone," I said, speaking loudly so they could all hear. "I wanted to inform you that there have been a couple of changes regarding the arrangement between me and Selene."

I paused to gauge their reaction, but there wasn't much to gauge. Dozens of glassy eyes stared back at me. They weren't moved. I wondered how many of them expected things to change with Connor's ascension so close.

"I have a new mate," I announced. "Her name is Phaedra, and I expect everyone to be on their best behavior tonight because I'm bringing her here."

Alarm drowned out the glassy looks in their eyes. In seconds, chaos erupted, with wolves wailing to be heard over their human counterparts. Among the words I picked out, reactions ranged from horror about what this meant for the pack to curiosity about whether Phaedra would be better company than Selene, who some viewed as "too stiff". I wanted to wait for them to settle themselves down, but that was easier said than done. I thought I'd have a better tolerance for the noise, but after only a few seconds of hearing their discordant voices, my skull started to pulse, and I had to put a stop to it.

"Enough! Enough!" I called, raising my hands. "It's understandable that you all have questions and concerns. I'll answer what I can now."

"What about the Coldcrow?" someone shouted. "They are our only allies. Doesn't this ruin our relationship with them?"

"I'm still working on an alternative deal with the Coldcrow pack," I said. "The more I talk with Selene, the better negotiations will go." At least, I hoped that was true. Given the way things had ended today, it wasn't likely that she would be eager to hear me out. Surely she would be able to see the value of a continued partnership once she calmed down.

"Does she come from a powerful pack? Is she bringing resources with her?" another asked.

"She's from the Wilcox pack," I said. "But no, she's only bringing herself. I assure you she will add value to our pack. Her wolf is very strong, and she's very intelligent."

"The Wilcox pack is made up of a bunch of spoiled brats!"

"How do you know she's not a spy?"

The statement and the question hit me one after the other. I wasn't sure what to address first. "Phaedra isn't used to the way we do things, but she will learn quickly. Please trust me the way you've always trusted me. She is not a spy. She hates the way the Wilcox pack and high-wolf society operates just as much as we do. She was rejected by them because of their unfair structure. She knows how we feel. She's a huge benefit to our pack."

"You sound like your father!" a particularly angry voice hissed. The words shocked me to stillness. "Your father promised us the world, but he didn't bring us the world, did he? All he did was make things worse, and you're on the way to doing the same!"

Not everyone in the crowd agreed, but the loudest and most outspoken of them added insults. What I could make out in the chaos scraped me raw, reopening wounds that had never fully healed. The longer it went on, the more it hurt, and the angrier I got.

My teeth sharpened as my wolf moved just beneath the surface, threatening to take control before I was ready, and before I knew it, I'd opened my mouth.

" Silence !" I added the alpha command to my voice, and my pack immediately became quiet and still. " You will be respectful when Phaedra is here. Do I make myself clear? "

The silence was enough of an answer for me.

"You're all dismissed," I said, turning from them. They slowly, quietly dispersed, and a sigh shuddered out of me. Since I took on the mantle of alpha, that was the first time I'd used the command on my entire pack. Some deep part of me was horrified I'd used it in anger—something my father often did. But a larger part of me was relieved the noise had stopped, and I'd ensured at least reluctant obedience from my pack. After all, I didn't want Phaedra to be scared off by my people. What if they hurt her feelings too deeply, and she never wanted to come back?

I started to return to my cabin when I heard the familiar cadence of Taig's footsteps stomping up behind me. He grabbed my shoulder and turned me around to meet his annoyance.

"What the hell was that?"

"That was an alpha taking control of his pack," I snapped, shrugging off his hand. "Or don't you know what that looks like?"

The disappointment in his glare speared straight through me. "You've gone too far, Asher. You're not being rational."

"What are you talking about?" I snapped. "Is it irrational to protect my mate, Taig?"

He shook his head at me. "Is the fated mark making you act like this, or are you closer to becoming feral than either of us want to admit?"

The question sent a tremor of fear down my back. When I didn't have a response, Taig walked away. I wavered for a second or two. Had I made a mistake in forcing everyone to do what I wanted? I was only doing what was best for Phaedra—and for them, too. She was a good person, and she was someone who brought a lot of value to the table. Couldn't they see that having her here was best for them?

They would with time. I had to believe that.

It was nearly time for me to shift again, but before I did, I licked the mark on my wrist that tied me to Phaedra. When I shifted, I started running in the direction of Heartbridge Cave to wait for my mate.