46. Mal

46

MAL

Me: Dammit, Doe. All right, you win. But you'll let me know the second you get to where you're going and the second you leave. And I don't want to hear that you're too tired to drive home afterward so you're spending the night over there. Not happenin'. You got a bed. You got a home, and it's with me. You need me to pick you up, I will.

Me: No promises I'll let you sleep once you're home. It'll be too fuckin' long since I've last been inside you.

M y fingers almost smashed through the screen as I typed that all out. A mixture of annoyance, worry, and rage filled me as I sat on the couch daydreaming of all the ways I was going to fuck Doe later tonight.

I didn't want to be that guy who told his girl where she could and couldn't go.

I refused to be like that, but fuck, it was hard not to be.

Being protective was in my blood, and it only intensified around Doe. The thought of anything happening to her made me murderous. The idea of some fuckwad trying to talk to her also made me homicidal, but I knew I needed to let her have her space.

Whether I wanted to give it to her or not.

My phone then started to vibrate in my hand from another text message.

Doe: We shouldn't be out too late, but if I need you, I'll call you.

Doe: Chances are, I won't be tired, so I'll be looking forward to a very thorough fucking tonight.

Fucking Christ.

This woman was going to be the death of me.

I then found myself reclining back on the couch where my hand immediately sought out my hair. Running my fingers through the strands, a rush of pent-up air had escaped my mouth.

Now, what the hell was I supposed to do tonight? There was no way I could sit around at home knowing she was out in the city somewhere. Even if I did find a distraction, the only thing that would be on my mind was Doe.

Pushing myself off the couch, my shoulder pulsated, but luckily the pain had been subsiding over the past couple weeks and it was beginning to feel like normal again. With daily physical therapy, Doe's strict rules on all things that involved my shoulder, and a willingness on my part to get back out onto the ice, I was hoping for a full recovery soon.

Everything in my life seemed brighter, but it was learning how to deal with this newfound feeling of having someone you deeply fucking adored that was throwing me for a loop.

I felt desperate to have her with me always.

For someone who had been alone for the past eleven years, I never wanted to experience that again.

And now that, it was as if this was my first test of whether I could handle being without her or not.

After sending Doe another message, I began to pace the layout of my home. Living room to kitchen. Kitchen to bedroom.

You need to fucking relax… I tried telling myself but it was easier said than done.

Next thing I knew, I was in the bathroom stripping off all my clothing and stepping into the shower.

I needed hot water and a place to sulk.

Fuck, I'm pathetic.

Once the temperature of the water was scalding, I propped my palm against the slippery tiles and let my head fall between my arms. Every aching thought was centered around Doe.

What she was doing, what was going on in her mind, and whether she felt just as fucking empty as I did without her. I felt as though all my emotions were ransacked by the consuming need to shadow her every move.

Protect what was mine.

It was completely irrational, but when a flash of her rose gold curls and beautiful fucking smile popped in my head, I decided that was all the justification I needed.

Without warning, my cock began to thicken. I pictured Doe walking through the bathroom door with a look of remorse across her face for the torment she was currently putting me through. Her plump bottom lip now took a beating from her top teeth as she took hesitant steps toward the shower.

Fuck…

Using my free hand, I wrapped a palm around my swollen dick. Immediately, I let out a lust-filled hiss that only fueled my desire for more. Then closing my eyes, I continued to let my fantasy drive me further into completion.

She'd eventually be on her knees before me with her head tilted upward as her smooth, golden skin was covered in droplets of water. Her perfect plump lips begging for my forgiveness as they recklessly left a trail of kisses along my pubic bone and thighs.

"Let me make it up to you," she would tell me, causing my cock to lurch in my grip.

"Let me prove to you that I'm yours."

Growling, I tugged with the intent of proving a point. That I was fucking crazy gone for this woman and there wouldn't be a single moment where I'd so carelessly forget that.

"Holy fuck…" I groaned as my head tipped back on the slow swirl around my needy tip.

I wanted her mouth.

I wanted her tight little pussy strangling me until I lost consciousness.

Up and down, I paced myself until finally, the telltale signs of orgasm began to crest. My whole body started to stiffen while my cock turned to stone.

"God… Fuck, I need your mouth, Doe," I pleaded above me as if she could hear me. "Come home, fucking come home so I can fill you up."

With a few more heavy, determined strokes, I was finally coming. Jets of it shooting out, covering the tiled shower as my back hunched over from the intensity of it.

"Jesus… Fuck…" I growled as the aftershocks hit me with a force.

Once the sensations had subsided, I realized that didn't satisfy my need for her. Not in the slightest.

And that's when I knew I was utterly and truly fucked.

That the woman I swore I would never have, had officially slithered her way into my goddamn heart and soul and all rational and all logical thinking was thrown out the window.

So finishing up my shower, I quickly dried off and opened a new message to James.

Me: Have any idea where the girls are going tonight?

In my head, I was already planning a way to go unnoticed.

James: That pasta joint right by the stadium. Why? You plannin' on showing up unannounced?

My jaw went tight.

How the fuck did he know that?

James: If you are, I'm in.

My eyes slanted together.

Absolutely not. The last thing I wanted was for him to tag along.

Me: I wasn't…

Throwing on a clean long-sleeve shirt and jeans, I received another text.

James: Well too bad because I'm already on the way to your place. We can ride together and crash their girls' date.

Fuck no.

Not happening.

No.