Chapter Seven

A dam hoped he had said enough to save Mrs. Malcolm from losing her position with the Beasley family, not to mention her good name. Lovers kissing in Sydney Gardens was probably nothing out of the ordinary. But a gentleman kissing a governess and being discovered by the lady he was supposed to be courting — that was beyond the pale, especially when the governess was supposed to be chaperoning.

Besides, it was indubitably his fault. Both times. This instance had been far better than the first. Instead of being punched in the stomach, he’d felt her body melt against his, inflaming his passions. He’d never experienced anything like it. Raw and hot and overwhelming until he had truly forgotten they were in a public place.

It must have been the darkness and the fact that they were practically alone with everyone in the Gothic Hall, listening to music. Or they should have been, except Lady Susanne had come out!

What now?

Lady Susanne allowed him to escort them home, although she would hardly look at him and wouldn’t speak to either one of them, not even when he addressed her directly.

“Will you keep what you saw to yourself, my lady, to avoid embarrassment to Mrs. Malcolm, or any greater harm?”

The greatest harm would be if Alice, as he now thought of her, was sacked. He didn’t know her circumstances but assumed her dead husband had not left her with much money, or she would not be working for the Beasleys.

For her part, Alice had shrunk into herself, turning away. If she behaved in such a guilty fashion, Adam feared Lady Beasley would know something had happened even if her eldest daughter said nothing about what she’d seen.

“Mrs. Malcolm, please do not accept any blame,” he added, trying to warn her to stand tall, chin lifted, and maintain her innocence. “I hope you accept my apology. And to you, too, Lady Susanne. I should not have left you alone in the Gothic Hall. But if you speak of this, how will your sisters’ governess be able to continue her lessons with a hint of ignominy hanging over her?”

Still, Lady Susanne said nothing. Nor did she bid him good night when he helped her out of the carriage.

Alice, on the other hand, looked him directly in the eyes. Instead of fury at his reckless behavior, she sent him a message of gratitude, which he did not deserve.

“Good night,” she said softly, her voice still subdued. Then she disappeared inside.

He barely slept, wondering over her fate, although he also marveled at his obsession with this woman who had been a stranger to him not long ago. She made his pulse pound like horse’s hooves and his heart soar, despite her being a widow and from a different class. He wanted to be near her, to find out everything about her, and mostly to kiss her again. Turning, he punched his pillow.

Was this how love started? Adam thought perhaps it was. Something inside her called to him in a way he had never experienced. And it certainly wasn’t happening with Lady Susanne.

On the other hand, it was inconceivable to take this beyond a summer dalliance — love or not. He knew from Lady Beasley that Alice was finished with London, whereas the city was his beloved home. In any case, he could not be seen with her there. As soon as her station was discovered, the assumption would be she was loose, maybe even accepting money from him.

In Bath, though, if she were willing, he could bring her to his private residence and tup her soundly. Perhaps she was lonely and would enjoy such a respite, even if that was all he could offer her.

Unable to let matters rest, he stopped by the Beasleys’ home as soon as the hour could be considered polite for visiting. Once inside, he wasn’t sure what to do. How could he speak to Mrs. Malcolm privately? And what of Lady Susanne?

The latter appeared, summoned by the butler’s announcement of Adam’s arrival. Not surprisingly, Lady Susanne wore an expression of disappointment. Unlike the last few times, however, her mother did not enter with her, which was fortunate but disconcerting.

“I did not expect to see you today, my lord.”

“I needed to speak with you, but I am surprised we are alone.”

“My mother is out. I have sent for my maid, and she will join us presently. Meanwhile, we can speak candidly.”

He swallowed. “Yes, that’s true.”

“Are you interested in courting me? More to the point, do you find me favorable above all other women?”

Adam ought to have expected the question, but he hadn’t. He thought he would spend time apologizing and soothing and smoothing everything over. Instead, the normally easy-going, unopinionated Lady Susanne had gone directly to the crux of the matter.

And he had to consider her question. In all the agonizing over Mrs. Malcolm — Alice — during the prior night, he had not given any thought to whether he could continue to keep company with the young lady who had been kind to him. Moreover, her mother was still his own mother’s friend. He must tread carefully.

“The length of your hesitation doesn’t bode well,” Lady Susanne said. “Simply because I don’t mind bending my likes to the gentleman with whom I keep company, and intend to do the same with the man I marry, it doesn’t mean that I am in all respects a doormat.”

“No, of course not,” he said.

What an awful thought, to be under someone’s foot in such a low manner.

“I am amiable, perhaps to a fault,” she continued, “because few things bother me and because my own enjoyments are easy to do in my personal time, such as perusing fashion plates and strolling the shops to search for the latest dress designs. Thus, I don’t push my own pursuits and pleasures upon others.”

“No,” he agreed, “you have not. You’ve been most accommodating.”

She nodded. “However, I am unwilling to be with a man who doesn’t favor me above all others.”

Nor should she. His respect for her had grown immensely.

“I understand,” Adam said.

“Even while courting,” she added. “It should be apparent to both of us very swiftly if we wish for the other to be in our future. I was certainly content to have you as my suitor, then my fiancé, and finally my husband. I would forsake all others and not allow another to escort me around Bath. In return, I would expect you to want me exclusively and not to have eyes for my chaperone.”

Her voice had raised in pitch, and he was glad the maid hadn’t yet joined them.

“You have every right to that expectation,” he said, knowing he could not meet it. “Unfortunately, my attachment has not grown beyond admiration for you as the daughter of my mother’s friend.”

“I understand.” She considered a moment. “Then I am glad to have seen what I saw last night so as not to be misled into thinking otherwise, nor do we need to waste any more time with one another.”

Adam was feeling as small as a garden slug. “I am sorry. I never meant to mislead you, nor do I feel any time we spent to have been wasted, for I truly enjoyed it.”

She nodded. “Now that we have clarified what is and is not between us, perhaps we should talk about Mrs. Malcolm.”

“What about Mrs. Malcolm?” came Lady Beasley’s voice through the open doorway. She entered and looked around. “Why are you two alone together?”

Lady Susanne opened and closed her mouth, and Adam wanted to bellow in frustration. Was he to take the blame for yet another indiscretion, this time not of his own making?

“Not to worry, Mother,” Lady Susanne said before he could begin to explain. “Mrs. Malcolm was here just a moment ago.”

Adam was startled by her lie but grateful.

“Why would she leave the two of you in what could be considered a compromising position?” Lady Beasley asked, sounding annoyed.

Lady Susanne looked at him, her soft brown eyes widening. He racked his brain, then said the only thing he could think of.

“She went to fetch a book for me. Mrs. Malcolm has a copy of... of... Northanger Abbey , and kindly offered to lend it to me.”

Lady Beasley appeared surprised. “I didn’t realize gentlemen had an interest in Miss Austen’s novels.”

“And why not?” he asked. “They are well-written tales of... of...,” Damnation! For the life of him, he couldn’t think what an Austen novel was about since he normally read stories of adventure, usually older works, such as Defoe or Fielding.

“Lord Diamond is being polite, Mother,” Lady Susanne said, saving him again. “Of course he hasn’t read Miss Austen’s novels of love and manners, but that one is different. Even I know it is set in Bath, and his lordship is immersing himself in our city.”

“I see,” Lady Beasley said slowly. “Nevertheless, this is impossibly improper. Susanne, come with me, and send a maid to find out what is taking our governess so long to bring the book to Lord Diamond.” She turned to him. “I wish we could stay and visit, my lord, but we have a prior engagement. I returned home only to collect my daughter. We are late to a tea party.”

“I apologize for my intrusion without an invitation,” Adam said, thinking it couldn’t have worked out any better. “Good day, ladies. I hope you enjoy your party.”

Lady Susanne gave him a last look that gave him hope she didn’t think too badly of him. And then he waited in the drawing room, hoping someone remembered to speak with Mrs. Malcolm. Otherwise, he might have a very long wait indeed.

As it was, in about two minutes she appeared, dressed in the dress she wore the first time he saw her playing the violin. His entire being sighed with relief at being in her presence once again.

“Lord Diamond,” she greeted, sounding breathless as if she had hurried. “I confess I am confounded by a message delivered to me to bring you this book as quickly as possible.”

She showed him the copy of Northanger Abbey she held in her hands.

“Moreover, I was interrupted during my French lesson with the younger Beasley daughters and told by the housemaid not to keep you waiting. I had to run like a mouse with a cat on her tail and dig this out of my trunk.”

He bowed deeply because, despite having kissed her soundly, he felt nothing but the deepest respect. “It was a bit of a ruse, I admit.”

“A ruse?” she asked. “To see how quickly I could make it from the third floor down to the drawing room?”

He smiled. She was enchanting. “No, definitely not that. Lady Susanne and I were caught in here alone.”

“Oh.” Alice’s tone grew serious.

“By her mother,” he added.

“Doing what?” she asked, narrowing her eyes.

Was she jealous? On his part, he would be green to the gills if he thought her kissing another man so quickly after their encounter.

“We were talking about the future and how there wasn’t going to be one for the two of us,” he said, hoping that made Alice the tiniest bit happy. “But we were alone. When discovered, I said you had left us to bring me your book.”

“Clever,” she said, although she did not sound overly pleased. “And where are they now?”

“Lady Beasley and Lady Susanne went to a tea party.”

Alice nodded. “Lessons to broaden her thoughts would do that young lady better than a party.”

“It’s admirable how you care for them.”

“The Beasleys have been good to me,” she said, “and I would like to see the three girls happy and fulfilled.”

“And what about yourself?” Adam wanted to know what she wished for her future.

“I am grateful our inappropriate behavior did not cost me my position, although it will be a little awkward around Lady Susanne for the time being. Even worse now I know you are ceasing to court her.”

“I hope it will grow easier soon.”

Silence fell, and they stared at one another. Adam wanted to step forward and sweep her into his arms. The desire was almost painful to resist, as if she were already pledged to him, his woman in truth, and he was being kept from her. Alice was like a princess locked in a tower, and irrationally, he wanted to liberate her as the prince in the Brothers Grimm fairy tale.

But even if he climbed that tower, he would find a widowed governess.

“You had best take the book,” Alice said, holding it out to him. “Not that I expect Lady Beasley to follow up on such a petty matter.”

As Adam reached out to take it from her, he realized she was gloveless. Quickly, he stripped off his own kidskin gloves, unable to pass up the opportunity to touch her bare hand. Sure enough, he was able to trace the underside of her fingers when he took the slim tome.

Staring at their hands, she visibly shivered, matching the trembling sensation inside him.

“Mrs. Malcolm,” he began.

Her gaze flew to his, and she shook her head.

“Good day, my lord.” With that, she all but ran from the room.

Blast! Cradling the book against him, he left. It was the ticket to seeing her again, even after Lady Susanne told her mother he would no longer court her.

A few days later, he received a letter from his own mother. Carolyn Diamond got quickly to her reason for writing by the second sentence.

We miss you, dear son. I hope you are well and behaving yourself.

He smirked. He was a grown man and could behave how he chose. Then he thought of his mother’s green eyes and how she could give a dragon’s stare when displeased, and his smirk vanished. Moreover, his father, a tall, personable man, could be firm — even a little frightening — when necessary.

Adam never wanted to disappoint either of his parents. He tugged at his cravat, which felt a little too tight, as he continued to read.

I heard from my friend, Lady Beasley, yesterday. It seems you have lost interest in her eldest daughter. That is a shame. I would not have minded linking our two families.

However, I know you have your reasons. You are a sensible man — mostly — and will find a woman who makes your heart sing. That is your father’s and my fervent hope.

Although I wonder if Lady Beasley will still invite me for sherry next time I am in Bath.

Then she entertained him with news of his four sisters, which he appreciated, making him laugh and also miss them more than he’d anticipated.

When Adam finally put down the long letter, he couldn’t forget his mother’s words about a woman who made his heart sing. Wasn’t that precisely what Mrs. Malcolm did?

He had felt unsettled since he first met her. Each time he was thrown in with both her and Lady Susanne, it was only Alice who interested him. And he could compare her to any number of women with whom he’d kept company, daughters of his parents’ friends, ladies he’d met at balls and dinner parties. None gave him the warm and effusive feeling she did. Certainly, none made him want to bring her happiness even at the expense of his own.

But Alice caused that and more, leaving him staring out a window and wondering how he could steal her away for a picnic.

A picnic couldn’t be against the rules for a governess. Could it?

He expelled a long breath, knowing perfectly well that it was. If she had a bachelor sniffing around her skirts, she would never be able to keep her employment. He must leave her alone since he did not intend anything more lasting for the future. Otherwise, it was unfair to her.

But oh, how he wished he could stretch out upon a picnic blanket with her, feed her morsels of tender chicken and grapes, drink wine, and then swive like rabbits.

If only he could speak with Clarity. His eldest sister would suss out the best course of action to make everyone happy. In lieu of her advice, he would have to figure it out as best he could.