CHAPTER 40

The car skidded slightly as I sped into the familiar paved driveway and pulled up just outside the front door of the pack house.

I had already stopped at my house first. Saw my mum and sister. Even though the urge to go straight to River was eating at me, I thought they deserved to know I was back. I updated them on everything I'd found out. Although, mum had already learned bits and pieces from Thea who'd called to inform her I'd left. It was no surprise that mum had been looking into the pack further and had been one of the informants that had helped the Knights gather their evidence against the rogues.

I didn't have too much time to catch up, and sensing my urgency to get to Riv, Celeste insisted I take the car. She still didn't trust him completely—given her scepticism and natural dislike for the wolves—and after I finally spilled a bit about Griffin, she was mad at me for a whole new bunch of reasons. But she knew this was what I needed right now. I promised I'd be back soon for a proper reunion.

I took a moment to soak it in. Being back here was hard. Very hard. But I couldn't shake the sense of familiarity and homely comfort that enveloped me, even if I wanted to. This place had always been homely to me. Until it wasn't.

I stood outside the large oak door, looking up at the wooden panels that made up the house. I wondered if River had seen me from the large open windows of his room that looked over the driveway—the same windows that I looked out of that night when I saw him carrying Amelia's dead body.

I couldn't believe I had been so wrong. That I hadn't even given River a chance to explain before I ran out of there like my life depended on it. This whole time I hadn't spoken to him once. I had left him and basically moved on with my life. The whole reason I even went to the academy was so I could get my revenge on him. On poor River who did nothing but look after me and the people of this town from evil supernatural scum. I couldn't believe how quick I had been to think the worst of him. I could only hope and pray he would forgive me now.

Standing on the large stone porch, I took in the smell of pine, dirt and nature as I tried to calm my nerves; a stark contrast to the city that had become my new normal. The smells were the same as I had remembered, comforting yet stronger now as my senses were enhanced. I was not the same as I was in the life I lived here. I was no longer that person. Yet I felt like I had almost been transported back in time. A time where River and I were all that mattered.

I stepped towards the door and grabbed the large black handle. As I pushed, someone else pulled and my heart stopped.

There, standing behind the door, looking startled, crushed and hopeful all at the same time, was River. His warm honey eyes locked on mine as his lips parted in shock.

"Venus?" His voice was so sweet and full, and hearing it shook my whole body. I never thought I'd hear it again.

"Riv," I breathed out, emotion filling me as tears swelled at the corner of my eyes.

I took him in. All his supernatural beauty. He was wearing a white t-shirt that stretched against his broad chest, the light starkly contrasted the dark I'd been so used to seeing with Griffin and the compound. And for a second my thoughts waivered, wondering what Griff was doing right now. But I pushed the thought aside.

River stared at me, patiently waiting for me to make the first move. Unsure of what to do in this delicate situation. He looked a little scared to touch me and who could blame him after the last time we saw each other. He was probably waiting for me to freak out again and run for the hills. He ran his fingers through his hair, seeming a little frustrated. I watched in awe, missing that signature move so much. I stared as the long strands fell back into his eyes and he sighed. It had grown longer since I last saw him, now sitting in beautiful, tousled curls just past his chin, almost reaching his shoulders. I mindlessly reached out to touch them out of habit, like I had done so many times before.

He stiffened, not knowing how he should react. After I pushed back his hair, I rushed into him so fast that I knocked the wind out of him. Wrapping my arms around his waist and burying my face into his chest, I sobbed. Tears attacked my eyes. I swear my body betrayed my macho girl front way too often. I was an emotional wreck more often than not.

Everything spilled out of me, no longer able to contain the overwhelming feeling of being in his presence once again.

"Riv, I am so sorry. I should never have left without letting you explain yourself. I know everything now. I know you didn't kill her. I know the rogues did and you were trying to save her. I know you've been trying to protect our town from them this whole time. I should have known you would never hurt a fly!" The words rushed out of me so fast, I was surprised he understood a thing, but he was used to me and my emotional ways. He'd dealt with it for years after all.

He sighed again and breathed me in, his head resting on my hair. He was about to say something when I cut him off. "I'm so, so sorry," I sobbed. "Please can you ever forgive me?"

When he chuckled, I stilled. Unsure and afraid. I tilted my head up, trying to read the emotion in his face—relief and joy. Not a single sign of resentment, anger or disappointment in those lovely warm orbs of his. The corner of his mouth was basically touching his eyes as he smiled down at me, his perfect teeth on show for the world to see. He stroked my hair, his golden tinged eyes squished up real small as the light danced across them, literally sparkling. It was a mesmerising sight.

He leaned down and kissed me softly on the lips—gentle and tenderly. It was quick. A fleeting moment between two people who had so much love for each other. Two people who had been apart for what felt like too long.

"There is nothing to forgive you for, Vee. I'm so glad you're back. I missed you so much it hurt. I'm so sorry that I failed you, I truly am. I understand that I scared you and I couldn't forgive myself knowing I hurt you—"

I cut him off. "It's my own fault that I was hurt. For not giving you a chance to explain. For not believing in you. When all you did was try to protect us." I reached up and held his cheek. "Listen to me. It's not your fault."

He smiled softly down at me, like he was in awe of my understanding. His warm eyes caressed my face. "I am the alpha though, Vee. I need to stop them. I am responsible for everything that happens in my territory," he said sombrely.

"I wish you had confided in me—that part did hurt. You shouldn't have kept it all from me," I whispered.

"I know, Vee. I was stupid. I thought I could fix it on my own. I thought I was protecting you." His eyes were sad. "All I wanted to do was protect you. Protect everyone."

"I know. But I don't need protection anymore. Maybe I did then, but not anymore. I can help now." My lips tilted in a smile. He looked at me with his eyebrow raised. "You better sit for this Riv, it's a long one," I added.

He grabbed my hand and led me inside and up to his room. Surprisingly, no one else was around right now so we had the place to ourselves. He'd probably mind linked them and told them to make themselves scarce before we entered. So we spoke freely. I was done with secrets.

I didn't make a move on him, apart from that one kiss—which he initiated.

I was extra aware of the ache and guilt in my heart that I felt after leaving Griffin. But equally, things felt like they could almost fall back into place with River, now that I was back and he was innocent. I wanted to make sure I understood it before even thinking about possibly picking things back up with him. Based on the way Griff and I left things, I could only assume we were done. We were casual, there were no promises. Plus, I doubted he'd want me back after I hurt him like that. But right now, I hated the Griffin-sized hole in my chest. I had gotten attached. More than attached. That wouldn't just go away.

I had a lot to work through.

Nevertheless, I tried to give my undivided attention to River.

We spent the rest of the evening and night cuddling in his bed, enjoying the familiar comfort of each other's company as I told him everything that had happened to me over the last several months. Minus the severity of the relationship between myself and the gorgeous six-foot two hunter—River's literal mortal enemy.

Once Riv had dozed off, I lay staring up at the ceiling above my head. The one I'd seen a billion nights in a row; a white roof, wooden fan and a shit load of glow in the dark stars. Familiar.

As my head rested on light linen sheets that I'd slept on night after night in a past life, the overpowering aromatic scent of oud, vanilla and roasted chestnut filling my nostrils and big arms wrapping around me, I felt weirdly at home once again. I'd told myself I'd never call this place home again. But here I was. Only home felt slightly different.