Chapter 6

Chapter 6

I'd arrived with a full half hour to spare, but I knocked no more than ten minutes early, in an effort to appear punctual without being needy.

Lila, however, took unexpectedly long to respond. Those ten early minutes ticked by, and there was still no clicking of a releasing lock or turning of a door knob. All of this was deeply concerning.

She couldn't possibly not want to see me. I came out as a vampire, not a fucking giant squid. Women love vampires. They always had before anyway. That half of my bloodline, paired with my knowledge of astrology and a few well-placed sweet nothings about compatibility, were my easy ins.

Granted, I hadn't actively been with many people since returning to Graves last year. Hell, she'd been my first woman in something like a year and a half, so maybe I'd forgotten what women liked. My charm was second to none on the backpacking circuit around Europe and Asia, and I'd had more than my share of random pussy, from human to harpy to dragon, but maybe what worked for those ladies didn't work for the awkward, introverted ones. Or perhaps what worked for a one night stand simply didn't work to form any sort of lasting relationship .

Hmmm, how philosophical.

Having never been in a long term anything was a flaw Adrian and I shared. Were we both traumatized? At the rate Lila was answering the door, I had plenty of time to ponder on that.

This was absolutely aggravating, but it was also a clear sign that I'd been approaching her all wrong. Would she respond better if I showed up at her door with a movie and a pizza, rather than a motorcycle and a devilish smile?

What in the actual fuck am I on about?

Was innocent little Lila Denton seriously making me question my sex appeal? Maybe her existence wasn't drawing me in as much as it was making me fucking insane. She had me questioning obvious reality, to the point her very existence was gaslighting my confidence. Which was wild, considering my entire persona with that woman had been shamelessly fabricated to win her over.

Maybe that was the problem. Maybe Lila would prefer the real me. She liked my grumpy, asshole brother after all…

I slowly ran my tongue over my teeth as I contemplated that thought, then I shook my head. We'd uh… work up to that. I'd terrified the last Zodiac Shifter I'd slept with during last year's Veloce field trip, and he still wasn't talking to me. I didn't want that with Lila.

I knocked again, showing great restraint, hopefully hiding the fact that each tap was characterized more by panic than impatience. It was another five excruciating minutes before she answered .

"Oh hey, Marcus." She spoke with neither interest nor urgency, and she was still dressed in sweats and a messy bun. While she looked good in anything or nothing, her complete disinterest in impressing me was a blazing red flag for such a new relationship. Comparatively, I'd spent half an hour trying to get my hair to be messy in just the right way before I'd come here, only to have to repeat it after my helmet ruined my best efforts.

Fuck, maybe she did like Adrian's stupid wings and horns better. Did he use his tail in some weird erotic way that I didn't know about? Was his species legitimately as much of a sex god as the legends implied, even though my brother was a closed off, frigid prude?

Either Lila was becoming a master manipulator, or she was just that unimpressed.

This was unacceptable. I mean, I wasn't about to say that the way those sweats hugged her deliciously thick hips wasn't visually appealing, nor would I ever imply that I didn't like her hair disheveled, but I wanted her to be cozy because she was content and comfortable around me, not because I'd become an unwanted afterthought.

By the mother fucking devil. I would claw my own eyes out if it would stop all of this uncharacteristic overthinking. Magic was the only explanation for why I would ever question myself around anyone. I could literally read her fucking mind, and I knew she at least sort of liked me at one point, so why was I spiraling?

"Am I too early?" I asked, somehow feigning cool and collected. I'd waited to knock again until I was two minutes late, which meant she'd definitely already passed whatever allotted time she'd given herself for changing and freshening up .

"Yeah, sorry, I lost track of time." Lila shrugged, but she didn't invite me in. "Can you wait out there for, like, ten minutes while I change?"

"Of course. Anything for a lady." Every muscle was tense, but I held still as she shut the door on me. The thought let's get this over with flashed through her mind, and I wondered where this sudden guardedness was coming from. She seemed fine the morning after. Fine enough anyway. Fine-ish?

I'd definitely read her completely wrong.

She kept me waiting for about thirty more minutes, letting me reel into insanity. Did she have any intention of coming back out, or was she standing me up at her dorm room door? What a thrilling adventure in self-doubt today was turning out to be.

When she finally opened up again, my whole body relaxed. She surfaced with her silky dark hair cascading down past her shoulders, wearing jeans that hugged her legs like a loving embrace, and a sweater that rested comfortably atop her hips, tapered to follow the soft shapes of her body. The heavy material accented her ample curves beautifully, and I may have stared at her longer and more silently than I'd intended.

Why was I so taken with her, and why was I becoming okay with that fact? This wasn't the plan. I didn't want it to be the plan. But… maybe…

I cleared my throat.

"Worth every minute," I said with a soft smile. Her cheeks flushed, the pink contrasting beautifully with her dark hair and pale skin, and my, she was truly a vampire's wet dream .

"Thank you." She looked away quickly, reverting to the bashful and humble girl I found so charming. I liked awkward and nerdy. This playing hard to get thing wasn't my type at all. I'd spent enough time trying to convince people of my value, and I made it a point to torture those who had. I would hate for her to fall into that category.

I was being unreasonable. It was difficult to get a read on her with so much chaos in my mind, but if her nonchalance was an act, she wasn't able to keep it up for long. She threaded her arm through mine, and we took the bike into town. Though I considered taking her to a nice brunch restaurant for this date, I thought better of having a sensitive conversation in too public of a place. There were a handful of magic-only bars and restaurants, but I didn't think she was quite ready for that yet, and I didn't want to attract attention from anyone else who might take interest in her uniqueness.

Not knowing what she was, paired with her ability to take on multiple mate scars, meant I didn't know what kind of creatures she might draw in if I exposed her to the wrong crowd.

Moreover, the fact that she had work afterwards meant we needed a more flexible plan, and I wouldn't risk disappointing her with a restaurant that offered slow service. It would be a crime if she had to start her shift hungry.

Being the resourceful local that I was, instead, I opted for a park and a picnic. She dismounted, and I rustled a pack out of the tank bag on my bike.

Her nerves seemed to soften when she saw me unfold a small blanket and spread it out in the grass .

Fuck, I'm romantic . How had I ever come to question myself?

She sat down beside me, and I unboxed some homemade sandwiches.

"You cook?" She seemed so surprised as she lifted a baguette packed with pulled chicken to her nose. She sniffed the Raspberry Chipotle sauce—which was also homemade, for the record—then she stared at me wide-eyed.

"Why would you assume I don't cook?" I blinked a few times, equally surprised by such a question. I wasn't a child, and I lived alone. How would I be functioning if I couldn't cook?

"I don't know. You're kind of… You just don't seem like the type."

"The type to… eat food?" Baffling. This line of inquiry was absolutely baffling.

"I mean, you're a vampire. Do you even eat food?"

Oh. I held back a laugh with everything I had, but it was exceedingly difficult. She truly knew absolutely nothing about me, and that was in large part my fault. Though her parents deserved the rest of the blame for not imparting any supernatural knowledge on their progeny. How cute.

I watched as she took her first bite of the sandwich. I waited for her to chew, anticipating the moment she'd light up with delight as the impeccably paired flavors settled on her taste buds. The joy was always in the eyes. My Raspberry Chipotle sauce was unmatched .

She practically giggled as she swallowed. She was so animated with her expressions, it was difficult to take my eyes off her.

I took a bite of my own sandwich and chewed slowly, wanting to savor the flavors that had her so transfixed for myself. She stopped eating to watch me, as if she was expecting me to throw it back up. Which was fascinating considering I'd had countless breakfasts with her.

"Of course I eat food." I said, resisting a teasing grin. "I just have to slather it in blood first."

A hue of green colored her face as she chewed another bite while she stared at the deep crimson sauce soaking into the bread. To her credit, despite the intrusive assumption that I'd made blood taste like raspberries, she finished chewing and swallowing rather than spitting it out.

"So that's not ketchup you put on your eggs every morning."

"A little compulsion and the lunch lady is happy to put a little of herself in all of my meals." I tilted my head with a smile. Her complexion blanched in horror, and I couldn't hold in the laugh any longer. "You're adorable, you know that?"

"You're messing with me, aren't you?" Her once agape lips squeezed into a flat line.

"You're also quite smart." I rustled her hair, and that seemed to lower her guard.

"So there's no blood in the chipotle? "

"Just sweat and tears." My eye roll was purely playful. "No, there's no blood in the chipotle. Just raspberries. Disappointing, I know."

"Do you really compel the lunch lady to put blood in your eggs though?" She asked as though the answer was of upmost importance.

"No, you've literally watched me squirt ketchup onto my eggs. I even bring the bottle to the table."

She rubbed her neck in pure embarrassment. "Oh yeah, I guess that's true."

"Besides that, I would never want to drink from the Ukobach who runs the cafeteria. Even her blood tastes deep fried."

"Ukobach?"

Sigh .

"It's a low ranking demon. Not important." I shook my head. "Do you actually think I'd put blood in your food without telling you?"

Lila took another bite before answering me. She made me wait for her to chew and swallow two more before she finally responded. "You don't tell me anything, so why wouldn't you."

Oh, she's bitter.

"Point taken." I suppose she wasn't wrong. There were many, many things I wouldn't be telling her even now, especially if she was this annoyed by simply not revealing that I was a vampire. There were other aspects of placing a mate mark that she would probably also hold against me, and I would just keep that information to myself. Even if she did clearly enjoy our connection. "So what can I clear up for you, Baby Doll? Let me make amends." Because you're worth it. I added for her directly into her mind, as though it was an accidental thought that slipped.

Her cheeks flushed, and the ease with which I could play this woman was viciously satisfying. I'd truly been insane to think I was losing my touch. A nice word here, a compliment there. She was effortless. Her lifetime surrounded by lesser men made my job entirely too easy.

"So let's start at the beginning. I get that Adrian is your half-brother, but how does that work… magically?" She asked first, though I could tell there was much more weighing on her mind. "From everything I read, cross breeding isn't really a thing among, uh… different beings."

"Oh." An unexpectedly complicated question. She must have been hanging out in the library, reading through the old war and species tomes. "Interestingly enough, when it comes to shifters, it's actually less complicated to mate with other kinds of magic creatures than it is to breed among ourselves. The primary reason species didn't mix in the past was purely due to social stigma, and not at all because of fertility barriers. In Adrian's and my case, we share a mother, but not a father. Which is the more important half, really."

She scrunched up her nose. "What do you mean the more important half?"

I leaned back on my hands and stared up at the gently wafting leaves of the shade tree overhead. The basics. She needed the basics of the basics of the basics. This was going to be a long and sexless date. "Because you get more magic from your mother than your father, since it's her body that ultimately grows, feeds, and shapes her offspring. Both parents and species are strongly represented in our bodies, and just like an ordinary human, our physical appearance can take after either parent, but typically the mother's magical traits are dominant over the father's when it comes to a hybrid species."

"So your mom was the shifter, but your dad was a vampire and Professor Karras' dad was an Incubus." Lila nodded along, easily following, just as I expected of her once I laid out the information. "Is that what you call yourselves? Hybrids?"

I shrugged. "Hybrids, half-breeds, monsters, beasts, hell-spawn, abominations, mutts, bastards. You pick." I'd heard it all at this point. Though it was hard to be offended when, in my opinion, it only made me a superior being.

"Hybrid is fine." She sunk her chin to her chest, then she apologized as if she was worried she'd said something hurtful. I squeezed her shoulder in reassurance.

"None of them bother me. I was allotted the magical gifts of two very powerful species without any of the weaknesses, so the more aggressive titles are only spoken in jealousy." She relaxed as I rubbed her arm. "Half-species are still rare and under-researched, largely because our existence is still taboo to the old timers, and a lot of hybrids don't like to openly admit they're not a pure species. Give it a few centuries to iron out the rampant inbreeding of the last several millennia, and I'm sure we'll be common enough to merit a more politically correct name."

Her nod was reassuring. "So when you say you don't have any of the weaknesses, what does that mean?"

"It means that, unlike a full blooded vampire, I can enjoy sunlight and garlic, and unlike a full blooded Zodiac Shifter, I'm not limited to only one astrological form. Instead, I get the strength, speed, and mind reading of a vampire, the ability to form mate bonds and change shape at will like a shifter," I partial shifted a claw and tapped it against her shoulder for emphasis, "and the immortality of both."

"And that's why you can eat people food."

"People food…" I raised a brow, Not considering me a person was a bit offensive, admittedly. I shook my head and she laughed it off sheepishly. "Yes, I can eat ordinary food. Though, the blood dependency is real. I can stave it off with a high protein diet, but I mostly just eat this stuff for the taste and the social aspect of going out to a restaurant. It's performative, not sustaining. I still have to feed." I shrugged before I took another bite.

"How often?" Lila spoke slow and steady, and I considered delving into her mind just to figure out what that knitting of her brows meant.

"Once or twice a week, typically. Nothing excessive."

"And if you don't?"

I rubbed my neck, a touch uncomfortable with that question. Those were memories I wasn't looking to recall. "I get a bit feral." I spoke quietly. I didn't like admitting to losing control, even less when it was the fault of my vampire, and there was no moon to blame, but it was becoming a constant around her. Neither half of my blood line could resist whatever strange pull she was subjecting me to.

"Can the person you feed on be human? Or do they have to be something magical? "

"Just not a vampire. I can feed on anyone who doesn't share my natural born blood parasites." It was my turn to scrunch up my nose. "Why are you asking this?"

"B-because, I was wondering if…" She paused for entirely too long, and I couldn't take it anymore. I sank into her mind and looked for what the hell she was on about.

It took everything in my power to resist a grin from spreading across my lips. "You want to know if I've bitten other girls since I met you?" I was chuckling before I could even get that sentence out. This girl is truly precious, and I was going to enjoy having her wrapped around my finger. If anyone was capable of breaking down Adrian's barriers, it was undoubtedly her.

"W-well… I mean, it's not like we're anything official, s-so…"

"Of course not." I cut her off, wanting to stop that line of thought before it could spiral. I was being truthful anyway. "Graves has a blood bank specifically made for vampires, comprising of anyone who was willing to be a donor in the event of brain death. Vampires have a surprisingly strong fan club among mortal and immortal species who feel honored to serve. Both men and women are somewhat equally represented, but since there's no real pleasure in it for me, I tend to draw from men who are as boring as the act. It's not as sexy as you might imagine." It was unfair bias, but it all cost the same, so I could be as choosey as I wanted. Women were better fresh, and none had ever compared to her unique flavor. There was no reason to bother violating civilized vampire etiquette and Graves law with a random helpless human woman. I had no intention of muddying my taste buds on inferior blood, especially not if it would risk upsetting Li —

"Then use me."

I think she spoke, but the words didn't fully register. I froze in place, and stared ahead blankly as that last revelation struck me.

Why did I care about upsetting Lila? I wasn't actually trying to date her in earnest. I wanted her to like me, but not because this was truly a courtship.

"I don't like the idea of you drinking from other girls. Or other anythings for that matter."

Was this something subconscious I hadn't fully realized? How long had I been making decisions like this? How long had I been putting her potential feelings before my own? Was I worried about my actions hurting her? Is that why I hadn't bitten another woman since I met her? Why I hadn't even considered finding another bed mate?

"So if you have to drink from someone every week, a-as long as you can do it without killing me…"

She was just a pawn. She was a toy in my game. She wasn't genuinely a person who mattered to me. I didn't have to be loyal to a pawn or a plaything.

"Is that okay?"

And yet the thought of upsetting her—My whole fucking chest constricted just imagining the hurt that would put in her eyes. Would that hurt her? If I was with another woman? Did she care about my loyalty? That would mean she wanted me.

I hoped that was true.

Holy fuck, I wanted to punch myself in the face for even thinking these thoughts internally .

Here we go a-fucking-gain. What the hell was she, and what gave her the power to draw this kind of bullshit from my brain. Moreover, why couldn't I get a hold on it? When I was separate from her, I could acknowledge her positive traits while still thinking of her as disposable. While in her presence, I was a smitten simpleton. This was abhorrent, and it had only become more intense as I got more tangled with her.

"Marcus?"

The sound of my name in her beautiful voice forced me from my trance, and I had to finally look at her.

"Yes." I said immediately. "Yes, I would like that. And no I won't hurt you. I promise I have more restraint on a normal day than I had that night. The full moon is a special circumstance." Keep talking. Get back to explaining. Talk about anything other than the fact that my body and my brain is legitimately ready to propose to some woman I don't even know, based on nothing but the goddamn tractor beam of her existence.

"Right, so that's the other part I really need to understand." She smiled at me, a blush painting her cheeks, and fuck if my own face wasn't uncharacteristically warm at the image. "So… are you conscious while you're in that form? Can you control what you're doing? Or are you more like a werewolf?"

"No, no, and yes." I shook my head. I can do this. Focus on staying the course. Facts. Bland, boring facts. "The curse of a half-shifter is similar to that of a were-species in the sense that the full moon has heavy influence over our bodies and minds, and it can force shifting when exposed to the full brunt of lunar light. But unlike a werewolf, we can't pass on our bloodline via bites, scratches, or general bloodletting. We're simply slaves to the night. That's why Graves is built with glass that keeps out both rays of sun and moonlight."

She adjusted on the blanket. "Wait, it is?"

"It is. The school was built for my kind, remember?" Okay, this was easier. These confessions were innocuous and bland and revealed nothing personal about myself. "Fortunately, as an Alpha, I'm at least allowed the grace of triggers. Outside my birth month, I'll only shift under certain circumstances. During my birth month, all it takes is a fraction of a second of exposure to the moon, and I'm completely under its control."

She scrunched up her nose. "Is it different if you're a Beta?"

I nodded. "A half breed Beta will shift every month they're exposed to the moon, and they're only allotted a singular form. They won't get a choice or the mercy of triggers. There are a number of inconvenient side effects, I hear, but that's all idle chatter I've heard over the years. I've never met one, so I don't know all the details." Unless you, my dear, are a Beta. It was possible, but I had no way of confirming without the blood test or observing her on the next moon. "Conversely, a full blooded Zodiac Shifter can only shift into their own sign, and they maintain full conscious control, even at the height of lunar influence. They're just like any other shifter, and their form is simply an extension of themselves, opposed to a wild, uncontrollable compulsion."

I thought on that for a moment. She'd gotten wet in the pools early on during the field trip, so she could have been an Alpha who triggered her shift. But she seemed entirely too conscious and entirely too unspectacular in form. She didn't resemble the Aquarius in any way, so it was unlikely to assume she was a fellow hybrid Alpha.

Her scent could also belong to an Omega though. That enticing apple pie had all the notes of prey begging to be eaten alive. I wished I knew more about how that combination was burdened, but I'd only personally met one half-blooded Omega, and I'd never spent a moon with one.

Or hell, it was still possible she could be something else entirely, considering nothing about her made sense. Though she appeared to be shifted on the last full moon, there was no way to say what she had even shifted into. I'd assumed she was in Virgo form purely based on my attraction to her, but what the fuck did I know anymore? Without having witnessed the exact point the moon had possessed her on that field trip, anything I came up with now was pure speculation.

"So you're really not a Beta?" She asked next, and I fucking choked on my saliva and accidentally bit my own tongue.

"Are you fucking serious?" I stared at her in utter disbelief. Calm down. CALM DOWN. I've been doing the sweet puppy dog thing around her. She knows not of which she speaks. It's an innocent mistake and a testament to the quality of my acting. It was a compliment, really. A compliment. "You thought I was a Beta?" My voice hit a higher octave than usual, and I would not be acknowledging that further.

"I mean, you always seem so nice…"

"What about Adrian?"

"Oh, well he's obviously an Alpha." Lila said matter-of-factly, and I took it all back. I didn't like this woman at all. She wasn't that smart, and she was the worst judge of character. Fuck this. I'm going to go bite all the random women I can find. "That's a lot to wrap my head around." She admitted, interrupting my thoughts while staring blankly at the duck pond in the middle of the park. "I wanted to come up with a million more questions for you, but I don't even know what else to ask at this point."

"Then think on it for a while. Let's set aside Demonology 101 for the day and just enjoy each other's company." I said through a forced smile. She seriously thought Adrian was an Alpha, and I was a Beta. I would not be getting over this. I mean, Adrian IS an Alpha, but still. "I'm not going anywhere. I'll still be around once you figure out what other questions you want to ask." Continuing to talk was the only way to drag my mind from the annoyed pit she'd pushed me into.

Un-fucking-believable.

"You're so sweet." Her smile was as real as the glint in her eye, and I demanded that my heart not melt like I was pathetic, while my mind was still enraged. "I guess being an Alpha and being a mean, stuffy jerk don't go hand in hand." Damn fucking right they don't. "Thanks for always being so nice to me. I wish you had given me a heads up about the vampire shifter thing, but I appreciate that you respect me enough to be honest with me when I ask."

Okay, good recovery . "Always, Baby Doll." Always-ish? We didn't need to talk about the night of the Capricorn. I couldn't have given her a one sided mark if I hadn't come inside her, anyway, so it was a necessary evil. I was, after all, so sweet .

The rest of the date passed by with pleasant enough getting-to-know-you small talk. I learned that she liked comic books and video games and science, and was obsessed with spaceships and sci-fi movies. I knew she still considered herself human, so I didn't bother to quiz her on her heritage again. We'd work up to that. Maybe on the full moon night of the Pisces, I'd be able to show her a mirror after triggering her own transformation, so there could be no argument or denial. It was just a matter of time, and I was a very, very patient man when I had to be.

I mean, I just let her call me a Beta. Really, I was a fucking saint .

As noon came around, we both geared up, and she pointed me towards her place of employment. It hadn't registered where we were going until I found myself sitting in front of a clothing boutique in uptown Graves.

"This is where you work?" I asked, my nose scrunched and a touch confused. Threads of the Magi…

She smiled brightly once she removed her crash helmet. "Yep, just started."

"I'm surprised they were hiring. So much of Graves is owned by old magical families, and usually they're very particular about outsiders." Or more specifically, they're very particular about hiring humans . I'd somehow expected her to be working at a large chain hotel or a restaurant or something, but this little shop was owned by one of Graves' legacy families. I'd never personally shopped here, but I knew their bloodline was well guarded, and they were very protective of their secrets. There was no way they would let her on the payroll without sensing a magic gift.

"One of my friends in my Calculus class is the son of the owner, and he got me a job." She said with a shrug. " He doesn't like me like that, so you don't have to be jealous." She added, completely unaware of the sheer number of problems I had with this whole situation.

First being that it was unlikely any male student was asking to spend time with her without a single ulterior motive. It was endearing that she believed men could be just friends with her, but if I was physically fighting obsession, then anyone else must be begging at her feet. It was only her own lack of self-confidence that had her thinking otherwise.

Secondly, I'd met one of the sons of the Arya clan in Astrology Club last year, and it was going to be a problem if we were thinking of the same person. I couldn't say for sure how many heirs they had, but I didn't trust anyone who was raised in that environment.

Thirdly, and most significantly, was the fact that an Arya never would have hired her without knowing she was absolutely not of unspectacular mortal descent.

Did he know what she was?

"I see." I managed to say in a friendly and confident manner, while my dark visor hid my expression. "Maybe I should meet this friend of yours."

Shock and distress immediately painted Lila's face, and she shook her head fervently. "No way. You'll get me fired so fast."

I snorted at that, despite my reservations. "Are you embarrassed to be seen with me in public now? I only fucked you on a group field trip one time ." I popped open my visor to offer a half smile. "I'm not going to walk in there and bend you over the cash register, I promise." This time .

"Stop." She laughed through the blush on her cheeks. "It's more like I don't feel confident you play well with other shifters." She spoke casually, but I tensed at the admission that this friend of hers had outed himself as such. I would hope she'd at least assumed he wasn't human, but for him to have confirmed the fact to her was… concerning.

Not the least of which because she hadn't mentioned any friends to me even when we were on our best terms, and now I couldn't help but wonder how long he'd been courting her, and how deeply he'd dug in his fangs at this point.

"Fine, fine, I can take the hint." Dismissive and unbothered was the best response to lower her guard. "Maybe next time."

"Oh, I do have one more question." She asked like the light bulb had been slowly flickering to full power. She bit her lip, dragging her teeth over the spot where I knew Adrian made his claim. Then she rubbed her neck where I'd placed my mark with the heel of her hand. "You said mate marks can be rejected, right?"

The thick swallow that bobbed down my throat was involuntary, even more so in light of this… friend. She removed the leather motorcycle jacket I'd given her, and folded it over her arm. She was nonchalant, like the question wasn't a shot through my heart.

"Right." I confirmed with well feigned indifference. "There's not time to get into it right now, but I can help you with that later if you'd like. I only put my mark there to protect you, and I understand if you'd like to slow down a bit. As long as we don't complete the pact, rejecting a one sided mark isn't permanent and can be reattempted until a pact is sealed."

Lila nodded, and when I say that motion dropped my heart into my stomach, I was underrepresenting the feeling in my gut.

Just like that, no further comments or reassurances, she flitted off to the clothing boutique. No goodbye kiss, no "see you later," no nothing.

I revved my engine loudly, then took off towards home. Not even the raw adrenaline of the ride was enough to distract me from the thoughts swirling through my head.

That hadn't gone how I'd hoped at all. If anything, I was now starting to think I'd legitimately fucked up. So much for compelling her, and so much for using her against Adrian. I was the one getting riled up now, and I hated that for me.

Deep breath. Deep fucking breath.

Stop losing fucking control .

Her influence should have subsided when she walked away, but I was still in knots over her, and I couldn't explain what was doing it. Had fucking her while we were both shifted implanted something in me ? Or was this sinking feeling completely mundane and unrelated to magic?

Did I have a crush?

I scoffed aloud in my helmet and returned my focus to the road. She'd gotten much more out of this exchange than I had. Which was fine, really. I was playing the long game here. If she walked away trusting me just a little more, while also volunteering to be my personal blood bag, we were going in the right direction. The casual question about rejecting my mark was probably more a curiosity than a threat. She was new to all of this after all. She didn't understand the implication.

This paranoia was completely unlike me.

I needed to slow down and approach this problem one piece at a time, from Adrian's emotions, to my own over-involvement, to the friend who knew she wasn't human and had invited her into one of the most guarded old families among magic-kind.

More than anything, I needed to assure I didn't lose my own sense of self in all of this. Something told me this game was about to get so much more complicated.