Chapter 12

12

Z hoel’s mocha had grown cold as he listened to the women talk about dating. At the moment, he was entranced by Steph’s story about a date at something called a “tailgate party,” though he was still unsure how it had anything to do with gates or tails. Human traditions were fascinating.

“It’s most fun when the weather’s nice and you can do it in the parking lot,” Steph was saying. “We grill burgers and blast music to get hyped before the game. Some guys get really wild, painting themselves with the team colors. Then we all go watch the game.”

Ann leaned close and looped one arm through his. “This time of year, the parties are cozier and held indoors. There’s a game on TV tomorrow night if you’re interested in coming over to my place.”

“Thank you, but I’m spending tomorrow night with Lila.” Politely withdrawing his arm, Zhoel turned toward Lila and realized her chair was empty. He glanced around the cafe, noting the tables were no longer crowded. Through the large plate-glass windows, snow drifted lazily from the sky. He’d been here longer than he’d realized. “Lila?”

“She waved goodbye a little while ago,” said Kylie.

He vaguely recalled Lila mumbling something about putting her cup away. Cursing himself for not noticing she hadn’t returned, Zhoel rose and stuffed his HGU into his pocket. “Thank you for all your help, ladies. We’ll be in touch again in a day or two to coordinate your first dates.”

“Don’t go yet!” said Ann. “We have a lot more ideas to share.”

“I’ll have to take you up on that another time.” Zhoel took his unfinished mug to the counter before heading for the exit.

As he stepped into the cold, his mind raced, wondering why Lila had left without him. He didn’t recall her saying anything about another obligation today. On the street, he saw no sign of her. Perhaps she went to tell her mother about their success?

His steps lightened as he pictured Lila waiting for him at her home, ready to celebrate. He was more certain than ever she’d agree to be his mate after today’s success. Tomorrow they’d spend Christmas Eve with her family, then he’d teleport back to his ship and arrange for Lila to join him on board. Everything felt right. He had people joining the app and now felt his permanent permit to conduct business on Earth would be approved without a hitch. They could integrate Lila’s trucking company into his business model, and with her by his side, they’d open his app to every corner of her planet. Maybe even branch out to include dates on other planets someday.

Feeling like he was heading to his own home, he turned toward the Carson family house. Snowflakes coated the sidewalk ahead in a sheet of pristine white. He traced a human symbol that Kylie had shown him on a patch of sidewalk—two rounded hills that reminded him of the luscious curve of Lila’s ass, with a V below that reminded him of the sweet well between her legs. No wonder humans use this symbol for love. Perhaps he should incorporate it into his company logo. He grinned and continued on.

When he reached the house, he trotted up the porch steps and knocked on the door, fingers itching to grasp the knob and burst right in. A few moments later, Lila appeared, her eyes shadowed with something he couldn’t quite place. Immediately, his Iki’i felt off—their connection distant, muted. The elation he’d been feeling sank like a balloon losing air.

“Lila?” He reached for her, but she stopped him with one hand. He frowned. “What’s the matter?”

She slipped outside and pulled the door closed behind her, crossing her arms against the cold. In a soft voice almost lost in the stillness of the falling snow, she said, “We need to talk.”

His throat tightened. “Of course. About what?”

“I don’t think our partnership is a good fit,” she said. “Not for the business. Not… for us.”

The ground seemed to tilt. “Why would you think this?” he asked.

“I worried about it before, shifting Carson Family Trucking’s focus from freight to people. But after talking with Ann and the others, I realized you’re going to need more than transportation—you need logistics and coordination across the globe. We’re a small-town company with a local focus. You need a partner with bigger…” her lip caught in her teeth, as if struggling for the words, “…international connections.”

He moved closer. “Hopefully someday, yes, but right now, all the beta testers are here in Bloomington. Your business and mine will grow and expand together.” He reached out and touched her shoulder. “Lila, we can make this work.”

“You were so caught up listening to Ann and the others, so caught up in the excitement of expansion and ideas, you didn’t even realize I had left.” She blinked, eyes glistening before she looked away. “Your dreams are much bigger than this town, Zhoel. You need to travel, and I’m tied down here.”

“No, you’re not.” He smiled, taking her chin to turn her to face him. “We’ll just hire someone to take over your job?—”

He felt the remainder of their tenuous connection slip like sand through his fingers as she jerked away. “Why do men assume I can just abandon my job to someone else? I’m not just ‘some hire’ and I do more than bookkeeping. I’ve worked hard to build our company. We can’t afford to just pay people to take over.”

“I’ll pay for it out of my budget. You’re my mate, and I need you by my side. You’ll continue to help build your family’s business, just in a different role.” Zhoel tried to use his Iki’i to reach her, to feel her emotions, but it was as if a wall had gone up between them.

“I have to stay. You have to go.” Lila took a step back, one hand resting on the doorknob. “I’m sorry, Zhoel. I hope your app succeeds. You have something amazing to offer the universe. But we’re not mates, and I don’t see a way our businesses can intersect.”

Before he could say anything else, she opened the door and slipped inside. The click of the latch echoed in the silence, leaving Zhoel alone and staring at the closed door.

A bitter gust of wind eddied snow across the porch, coldness sinking into his bones. How had this happened? The future he’d envisioned, the life he’d dreamed of with Lila—all of it had dissipated like his breath in the wind, leaving nothing but chill emptiness in its wake.

He realized his hand was hovering just shy of the door handle. Everything inside him screamed to chase after her, to make her see the future he envisioned—one that was filled with her laughter, her presence by his side, the fulfillment of both their dreams. Instead, he stepped back, legs heavy and chest hollow.

My Iki’i has failed me again .

He should’ve known what she was feeling. Been able to stave off her concerns. The crushing disappointment filling him now was worse than when he’d failed his father. He thought she’d been excited to travel. Excited to expand her family’s business. Do I even know what her dreams really are?

Turning, Zhoel stumbled down the porch steps, heart aching with every beat. He paused at the bottom, looking back at the house for a long, long time. The window to the living room glowed softly, and he could almost hear the echoes of laughter from the previous night—the comfort of a family he’d hoped to join. He’d misread the situation and lost his chance—just like he always did.

A car rushed past on the street behind him, and a lonely dog barked in the distance. The ashy scent of smoke drifted from someone’s fireplace with no hint of warmth. It had been foolish to think he could build a life with someone like Lila, that he could truly belong to anyone. The universe was vast, and maybe he was destined to roam it alone, an outsider forever looking in.

He turned away from the house and began to walk, feet shushing through the fresh snow. The streets of Bloomington were quiet, and a chill breeze bit through his clothes, but he barely noticed. He eventually found himself at the edge of the skating pond. The rink was empty now, the surface hidden by snow. The memory of his time with her lingered like a dream—how happy they’d been, the way she’d looked at him, full of warmth and joy. He could still feel the press of her lips, the thrill that had coursed through his veins, the certainty that she was his.

For the first time since he’d come to Earth, Zhoel felt truly lost.

He dropped onto a bench at the edge of the pond, burying his face in his hands. His Iki’i thrummed with sorrow, Lila’s absence a deep, aching void that he didn’t know how to fill. Even the success of his app held no joy. Earth held nothing for him if he couldn’t experience it with her.

Maybe it was time to accept that he didn’t belong here—that he didn’t belong anywhere. He was just an alien, a stranger who had dared to hope for too much.

He reached into his pocket for his HGU so he could send his coordinates to the teleporter, but his fingers met a tangle of leaves and berries. Mistletoe . As he pulled it out, Ann’s words returned to him: you kiss under it for luck . What he wouldn’t do for some of that luck right now.

A slow determination rose inside him. He’d come here to learn about human culture for his business, and there was one last Christmas tradition he wanted to experience with Lila. With the mistletoe clutched tightly in one fist and his heart hammering, he began striding back toward her house.