37. Reckoning

37

Reckoning

W hen the doorbell rang the next morning, I knew.

It was early, we’d just finished our coffee, and I wasn’t ready, but I knew.

“Is that her?”

“Yeah.” He stood and pulled me up from my chair, then tugged me into his chest, his sapphire eyes wary on mine as he brushed back my hair. “I know it’s fast, but she’s leaving tonight. You don’t have to talk to her if you don’t want to, but I’d appreciate it if you would.”

“Of course,” I murmured.

Zoe was Dylan’s birth mother, Gabe was her father, and I knew where babies came from. I had to get past my own insecurities and trust what he told me was truth.

I closed my eyes. It would only be more difficult if I put it off.

He cupped my face in his hands. “Remember, Zoe and I already talked about all this.”

I flinched.

His chin dipped. “Shae,” he warned. “Don’t even think about it. I have no interest in her, but I do want what’s best for Dylan.”

I pursed my lips. “I know.”

“Zoe knows the deal. You’re with me. We’re raising Dylan together. You’re already Mommy and we are not taking that away from her or you.”

I met his earnest gaze.

“She has a decision to make, but it is her decision.” He twisted his lips to the side. “Until Dylan asks. When Dylan asks, I won’t lie to her.”

I nodded.

He tightened his grip on my face, the frown line between his brows pronounced. His eyes narrowed as he searched mine. “Are we okay?”

I relaxed and covered his hands with mine. Leaning closer, I promised, “Yes. We are most definitely okay.”

He blew out a breath and dropped a quick kiss to my forehead. “Let’s get this over with.”

Tugging me by the hand, he led me out of the kitchen to the living room.

I paced back and forth while he answered the front door, his greeting perfunctory.

She murmured something too low for me to hear, then she was there, trailing Gabe into the living room.

Gabe dropped into his chair, long legs stretched out, ankles crossed.

Her wary eyes flicked up to mine before dancing away.

Turning to Gabe, she asked softly, “Can you give us a minute, Gabe?”

He settled deeper into his chair, crossed those corded, tatted-up arms over his broad chest, and pasted a mocking smile on his face. “You know what? I don’t think I can.”

Zoe shook her head but huffed out a laugh. “Okay, I get it. I’m the Big, Bad Wolf and she’s Goldilocks,” she teased, tossing me a smile.

I held her gaze but didn’t smile back.

“Goldilocks has teeth,” she murmured.

My patience ran out. I said I’d accept her, but I’d be damned if I’d play the mouse to her cat. “Why don’t you make your point?”

She held her hands out to her sides then let them drop. Meeting my eyes bravely, she apologized, “I’m sorry. I had no right to barge in here and disrupt this beautiful life you guys are building.”

Her voice softened. “And it is a beautiful life, not only for you, but for Dylan.”

Her eyes glazed as she swallowed hard. “I signed away my rights when she was 18 months old. It wasn’t something I did spur of the moment,” she admitted, then dropped her gaze to the floor, looking lost.

My heart hurt.

She continued, “I know this is terribly selfish, but somehow I always felt like I could step back into that role of mother whenever I wanted even if she only ever called me aunt.”

She raised her chin and met my eyes. “I didn’t expect you.”

Gone was the cold, dismissive, calculating woman of a few nights before.

This woman laid her heart bare.

I opened my mouth to speak, but no words came out.

She rushed on. “I won’t interfere. I want Dylan to have a mother.” Her face crumpled for a scarce second before she wrested it back under control. “I wish it could be me.” Her lip trembled, and her voice wobbled, but she pushed on. “But I’m not that woman. Telling her I am will only lead her to have expectations I can’t meet.” She winced. “Gabe and I disagree on this point, but I know it will only hurt her in the long run.”

“And what do you need from me?” I asked softly, hurting for her despite the trouble she’d caused.

She met my eyes. “I need you to let me be her Aunt Zo-Zo.”

“Okay.”

Her mouth gaped open then snapped shut. Her gaze skittered to Gabe before returning to me. She searched my eyes and licked her lips nervously. “Okay?”

I held her gaze. “Be respectful of me and keep your hands off Gabe. If we all focus on what’s best for Dylan, we won’t have a problem.”

Her eyes fluttered shut as she exhaled, “Thank you.”

Spinning slowly on her heel, she took a tentative step toward Gabe. “I am truly sorry, Gabe.”

He gave her a short nod, his eyes hard. “One free pass. One.”

If I had any lingering doubts about his feelings for her, that last word abolished them all.

She nodded back shortly. “I got it.”

With one last look at me, she smiled shakily. “I’ll call you when I’m coming back into town. Arrange a visit. Is that okay?”

I relaxed. “Works for me.”

She dropped her gaze to the floor. Her hands fisted at her sides as she shifted from one foot to the other. Wrapping her arms around her torso, she nodded and whispered, “Thank you.” Without waiting for a response, she spun on her heel and trotted down the hall.

Gabe tilted his head, listening until the front door snicked shut. Returning his attention to me, he laid his head back against the chair and inhaled deeply.

Dark circles shadowed his eyes. Patting his thigh, he invited, “Come here.”

Feeling as though the weight of the world had fallen from my shoulders, I closed the distance between us and curled up on his lap.

His chest rose and fell deeply. “You okay there, Big Mama?”

My laugh turned into a sob as I turned my face into his wide chest.

His big hand braced against my back, cradling me close.

I was home.