Chapter 30

Chapter Thirty

Landon

Listen to Vampire

by Olivia Rodrigo

M ax was pounding on the door.

I thought of not answering and staying quiet until he went away. Unfortunately, I knew both of us were working at Red tonight and the confrontation couldn’t be avoided. I’d barely slept, and my damn eyes were red and swollen from crying, but damned if I was going to cower.

I let him in.

He looked wary as he stepped past me, wearing an oversized hoodie, jeans and sneakers and holding a large coffee. Awkwardly, he handed me the cup. “Brought you a skinny vanilla latte,” he said. His voice held all the proper apologetic notes, which made me angrier.

“Thanks so much. Definitely makes up for putting your dick in another woman.”

He winced but didn’t try to defend. “There’s nothing I can say to make things right.”

I studied his face. Regret carved out his features and those blue eyes shone with a shame I didn’t think he was faking. Not that it mattered. Everything he did from now on made me question him.

“You’re right.” I sipped my latte with shaky fingers, hating how angry tears burned my lids. “I wouldn’t even try.”

“Baby, I’m so sorry. I know what I did was unforgivable, but I’m begging you to listen.”

“Don’t call me baby.”

“Okay, I won’t.”

I crossed my arms in front of my chest for protection and glared at him with hatred. “I thought the cheating was the biggest betrayal. But now I think it’s the lying. The constant gaslighting. Asking me to trust you until I felt like I was the one in the wrong by suspecting you. You looked me in the eye and swore you didn’t do anything in Long Beach. God, Max, who are you? Why did you do this to us?”

He lifted his hands up in appeal. His voice broke. “Landon, I made a terrible mistake. I fucked up the best thing in my life and I’ll never forgive myself. There is no excuse. All I can say is I got drunk and I don’t remember any of it.”

Bitterness choked me. “Don’t! God, really? The I don’t remember excuse is beneath you. I’d have more respect if you told me you just needed to get laid and she was the best candidate.”

He jerked. “Of course, you won’t believe me, but it’s the truth. When I found out what I did I was sick. I threw up the next morning.”

I gave him a twisted smile. “Oh, I bet you threw up because you found out there was a video.”

He rubbed his hands over his face. “I lost my mind when I found someone had taped it. All I could think of is how a few lost moments in time could ruin everything good in my life. I was desperate to keep it from you because I knew there’d be no forgiveness and I knew I couldn’t live without you.”

“Well, now you have to.” I hated this—hated his sad eyes and broken voice and cheap apologies. I wanted to haul myself across the room and beat the shit out of him. I wanted him to hurt like I did, and I wanted to cry because he’d ruined all of the possibilities and hope between us. “There’s no going back or forward. It’s over.”

“Please, Landon. Just take some time. I swear I’ll prove myself to you no matter how long it takes. I’ll do anything for you—you’re the love of my life.”

“If I was, you wouldn’t have fucked another girl!”

He hung his head and I clenched my fists, hating him with all my energy. My heart was a throbbing, raw wound and I wondered if I’d ever trust anyone again. What was it about me that made me so unlovable? My father. My mother. Now Max. Was I so disposable and easy to forget?

“I know. But I’m going to show you I can be the man you need me to be. I swear to you, Landon, I’m going to make things right. I won’t go on any trips without you. I’ll dedicate all my time and energy to this relationship. I will heal us if you think about giving me one more chance.”

He lifted his head and I watched tears run down his cheeks. I’d never seen Max cry. Didn’t know if he could. Slowly, he got on his knees in front of me while I stared in a combination of horror and shock and satisfaction.

“I love you so much. I’m nothing without you, baby, nothing. I will make this right. Please let me make this right.”

It was an epic apology. A surge of justice from his obvious pain soothed some of the gaping wounds, but it was too late.

There was nothing left of us to salvage or save.

“It’s over, Max. Please get out.”

I waited for him to fight me, revving myself up to scream and throw him the hell out. But he got to his feet, wiped the damp tracks of tears off his face, and slowly walked to the door.

“I won’t give up on us, Landon. I know this is worth fighting for, even though you don’t believe it. And I’m going to show you.”

The door closed softly behind him.

I wanted to smash dishes and vases in an old-fashioned temper tantrum but I refused to make a mess in my apartment. There was one thing left to do in order to get through the day without going insane.

I called Elle and told her to come over and that I’d broken up with Max.

“Are you sure you’re okay to be here?” Elle asked worriedly.

Red was packed since there were a bunch of summer street fairs and concerts in the area. The lounge throbbed with a dark, sexy vibe, and I’d been given a few eight and twelve tops to deal with. But the tips were extra generous and damned if I was going to allow Max to run me out of here. He’d tried to come see me before my shift but I shut him down.

He’d been stuck behind the bar without a break and I was glad. The last thing I needed was his puppy dog eyes trailing me and his ridiculous vows of making it all right. The women trying to catch his gaze were all way too eager, and I wanted to tell them the best way to catch his attention is pretending he’s not even there. Maybe they’d have better luck than I did.

“Yeah, I’m fine. Thanks for letting me cry on your shoulder all day.” Elle had come right over with wine, croissants, potato chips, and cheese. I wasn’t an ice cream girl and preferred carbs and salt. I sobbed and got tipsy and made a fuck-you video live that I could send Max whenever I wanted.

“Babe, I’m here for you. I couldn’t even talk to Coop today I was so pissed. No way he didn’t know about Max cheating. I hate all these guys lying for each other and thinking it’s bro code. Coop should have told me.”

I went to the right side of the bar to pick up my drinks, smiling at Randy, the other bartender. I ignored Max’s longing look. No way was I even talking to him tonight. I’d already asked Randy to do all my drinks, and he agreed. Max was already shooting him death glare looks because he knew Randy had wanted to get in my pants since day one.

“Coop didn’t tell you because he knew you’d tell me,” I reminded her. “They’ll always stick together.”

“Well, if you end up killing him, I’ll be your alibi,” Elle said with a wink. “And if you need to cut out early let me know. I’ll make sure Rock doesn’t give you shit.”

Randy leaned over the bar. His greedy gaze snagged on my short skirt. “Heard you’re single,” he drawled. “Bad for Max. Great for us.”

I laughed. Randy loved to flirt but no way was I getting entangled with him. “I’m laying off bartenders for a while,” I teased, determined not to be all sad and mopey at Red. The best revenge is to enjoy myself and show Max I wasn’t going to cry over his betrayal.

“Sure you don’t want to lay this one?” he teased back, deftly pouring a beer as he gave me sexy eyes.

“Gonna think on it,” I called back, tossing my hair. I enjoyed the attention as much as I enjoyed Max shooting daggers at Randy. Max had always been possessive, and easy to manipulate when it came to men’s attention on me. We kept a tight leash on each other for a reason, but now that he’d broken it, I was going to make him bleed with regret.

Gabby came running over and before I could say anything, she gave me a big hug. “Landon, I’m so sorry,” she said. Her features reflected distress. “What a prick. I heard about the video.”

Everyone had now heard about the video.

Nothing spread faster or hotter than gossip, especially at Red. I didn’t even bother to ask who’d said something, because it didn’t matter. We were all part of the gossip ring here and all took our turns.

Normally, I’d distance myself from Gabby. Yes, we’d been getting closer, but this type of hurt I saved for my closest friends I trusted completely. But something had shifted between us after Atlantic City. She’d been showing up for me, checking in, sharing my social posts and making me laugh. She wasn’t being fake—I could tell the way she looked at me with such passion and regret that she was just as pissed at Max.

I sighed. “Yeah, it’s been a crazy ass twenty-four hours.”

“I’m here if you need me. I can come over after work, get you drunk, or put Nair in Max’s shampoo bottle.”

That made me laugh. “Thanks, I really appreciate it. I need to get through this shift without dealing with him.”

“I’ll keep my eye out but I’m in the lounge and I’ll barely get out of here alive. Take your break with me and Elle later so we can talk.”

“I will.”

I closed out my big tables and focused my energy on the three smartly dressed guys who smelled of money and influence. A quick appraisal showed designer clothes, manicured fingers, and Rolex watches. I channeled the type of server they wanted with an expert ease, morphing into the all-American blonde who was easily impressed by their power.

I tilted my head flirtatiously and gave each of them an admiring stare. “Let me guess. Definitely not beer, you’re much too sophisticated for such a common choice.” They watched me with interest, temporarily done with their phones and importance to chat with a pretty waitress. “I’d guess martini. Gin, not vodka. Olives, not lemon.”

They looked at each other in surprise. The leader of the group—there was always a leader—regarded me with a gleam of appreciation in his gray eyes. He was attractive in that corporate type way, but I would never be interested in someone so civilized. The image of Adam flashed in my brain—his dark intense stare and tats and rough, battered body. Of his broken, poetic soul creating songs that called to my soul. He didn’t have civilized cell in his body and I loved it.

Even though we were over. After all, I hadn’t chosen him.

Their laugh brought me back to the present. “Very good. Extra olives for all of us, please. And extra dirty.”

I fluttered my eyelashes and allowed a blush to creep into my cheeks. Thinking of Adam made it easy. “Got it. Anything you need, gentlemen, I’ll take care of it. I’m here to serve.”

I walked away, hearing the whisper, “I’d like to serve her something” and their chuckles.

I grinned, not offended at all. It’s exactly what I wanted, for the money, and to piss off Max.

Already, he was staring at me with sulky blue eyes. He liked to watch my tables and assess if anyone was hitting on me, and my reaction. I’d told him several times my flirting meant nothing and I’d been telling the truth. But tonight, I had no problem pushing his edges. It may not be adult of me or rational but I wanted him to regret his actions.

I wanted him to hurt.

I didn’t realize what happened next would set off a chain of reactions and events I’d never be able to take back. Afterward, I would always wonder if I was just as bad as Max for what I did. To all of us.

Would I have chosen to do the same thing if I’d known the fallout?

I was done lying to myself so there was only one answer.

Yes.