Chapter 17

SUNDAY, JULY 3, 1904

Eleanor accompanied Marvella and the Judge to church on Sunday. Word had come via a railroad worker that her father and Mr. Grinnell wouldn’t make it back until Monday morning on the Fourth of July. They’d be there just in time for the celebration, and with them would be Louis Hill. Mr. Hill had intended to come in prior to that, but when he learned that Grinnell and Briggs were studying the eastern parts of the planned park, he stopped to join them.

The Judge said it was of little relevance for Louis Hill to come back to Kalispell. But then word had been sent that Hill wanted to talk to the people about how often the train would come to Kalispell. Which had given many hope.

Others thought it was all a ruse.

More than one argument had started over the tension. And until things were certain, disagreements were bound to increase. Which could lead to violence.

Something Eleanor had no desire to witness.

She followed the Ashburys to the same pew they sat in every Sunday, and Marvella handed her a hymnal. In a few moments, they were all on their feet singing songs Eleanor didn’t really know. She sang along as best she could, but her mind remained on her own misery.

What should she do? She wanted to speak to her father about her feelings. She wanted to ask him about his beliefs. And maybe share how she was struggling with faith and God.

After singing, prayers were offered, and then the pastor took the pulpit. He welcomed the congregation, offered a prayer of thanksgiving for the day the Lord had given, and launched into his sermon.

“Nothing in this world happens by chance.”

What? Eleanor stared at the man. How could he say such a thing? Nothing?

“Throughout God’s Word we can see where everything He created was made with a purpose and order. He didn’t create the plants and vegetation until the sun was in place. He didn’t create fish before there was water to put them in. He had a specific plan. He created man fully formed and ready to work, but not before He had a garden to tend.

“God didn’t send His prophets willy-nilly into the world. He knew where He needed each one. Knew what they would say and do and who would answer His call. He knew when He sent His precious son Jesus to the earth that there would be many who would reject him ... kill him. And still God made His plans. He did nothing by chance.”

Well, that seemed true. Despite her confusion and feelings about God, she had never been able to make sense of the idea of order out of chaos without a Creator working to put it all into place.

“God is a God of order. He formed the earth and all that is in it, knowing exactly how it would all fit together. God is in the details of His creation. He knows each mountain and lake ... each person. God told Jeremiah, ‘Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee;’ and in Matthew 10, Jesus tells us that the very hairs on our head are numbered.” The balding pastor paused and chuckled. “Although my count changes daily.” The congregation joined him in laughter.

“Nothing happens by chance. There is order. God’s perfect order. We don’t always understand it or comprehend the reasonings behind it, but God has a plan and purpose in our lives. He has called us to order ... to peace of heart and mind.”

What would that be like? Peace not just of heart, but of mind? Was God really calling her to that? Had He known her before she was formed in her mother’s womb? Did God truly give her life with a purpose just for her?

If so, what was that purpose?

Maybe that’s why she felt so lost. God ordered her world only to have her disorder it by closing herself off from Him. Mother had assured her that God knew all, including the choices each soul would make. If that were true, then He knew the choices Eleanor would make. He knew the pain and struggles she would have and the decision she made to push Him away.

No, not just that. She rejected Him.

Such a harsh word. Carter had rejected her, and it hurt. It hurt her more than she could say. She wasn’t looking for a husband, yet when Carter made it clear he wasn’t looking for a wife and that even if he were, she wouldn’t be the one he’d choose, it devastated her. Made her feel unimportant.

Was that how God felt when she rejected Him?

But God hasn’t been important to you. You’ve ignored Him. Blamed Him. Refused Him.

Eleanor lowered her head. Was her rejection of Him unchangeable? Was it too late to alter her course?

She didn’t even hear the rest of the sermon. She couldn’t pull her thoughts out of the abyss into which they’d settled. If it was too late, then she truly was hopeless.

After the services concluded, Eleanor felt no better than when she’d started out that morning. Was this the way it would always be?

“Marvella. Ellie.”

Eleanor looked up and found Sarah Brunswick. She smiled, but it was Marvella who responded.

“Why, Sarah, how good to see you.”

“It’s good to see you too, Marvella. I wanted to come and extend an invitation to you and the Judge, as well as Ellie, to come to the farm for lunch today.”

Just then Carter came to join his mother. Eleanor couldn’t even look him in the eye. Instead, she toyed with the cuff of her blouse.

“Oh, my dear, we can’t come. The Judge and I are committed elsewhere after lunch. Plans for the Fourth of July, don’t you know. But I’m sure Ellie would love to join you. She was impressed with the farm, weren’t you, my dear?”

She had no choice but to glance up and smile. “I was. Your farm is very peaceful.”

“See there, I knew she would be happy to go.”

“We came in our two-seat buggy.” Sarah glanced around. “But Carter is joining us, and I’m sure he’d be happy to rent a conveyance to bring Ellie out. Especially since he’ll be returning to town later after lunch.”

Eleanor swallowed the lump that had formed in her throat. She wasn’t sure she could bear a carriage ride alone ... with Carter.

To her surprise, red rushed into Carter’s face! Was he actually ... embarrassed? She hadn’t known that was possible.

“Mother, that would hardly be appropriate. I wouldn’t want to risk Ellie’s reputation.”

Eleanor stiffened. He didn’t want her to come to the farm. She lowered her head.

“You are good to think of such things, Carter.” Marvella bestowed a gleaming smile on him. “I tell you what. Come to our house and use our surrey and take Nora with you two. She’s one of our new maids. I won’t need her this afternoon. She’s older and can act as chaperone. If that will be all right with you, Sarah.”

“Of course. She’s welcome to join us. Carter, does that meet with your approval?”

His shoulders relaxed, and he shoved his hands in his pockets. “Absolutely. It solves all our problems.”

If only Carter was right. But for her, the problems were just beginning.

“Wonderful, we’ll see you at home.” Mrs. Brunswick smiled, and Mr. Brunswick tipped his hat before slapping the reins and moving their wagon out of the church yard.

“Ellie, you might want to change your dress.”

“Yes, dear, you should.” As usual, Marvella made it more of an edict than a suggestion. “We’ll head home, then. Carter, did you walk to church?”

“I did.”

Marvella nodded. “Then come with us. We have plenty of room. And it’s the very surrey you’ll be using.”

Eleanor shifted in her seat to look at her hostess. “Won’t you need it to go to your meetings?” There had to be a way out of the ordeal without coming right out and asking to be excused.

“No, my dear. Our meetings are close to home. We had planned to walk. Now come. Let’s get you home so you can change clothes.”

Eleanor sat with Marvella in the second seat of the surrey. The Judge liked to drive the carriage himself and so sat in the front seat. However, later, when Carter took the reins, Eleanor knew she’d be expected to sit with him up front while Nora would sit behind them.

“I hope you have an enjoyable afternoon, Ellie. This will be a wonderful time for you and Carter to get to know each other better.” The older woman smoothed out the skirt of her dress. “I’m so glad to know you won’t have to spend the day alone.”

Eleanor could hardly think, let alone figure out what to say. She gave Marvella a slight smile and nod. She was almost desperate enough to try and pray her way out of the situation. ...

“Hello, Mrs. Ashbury, Miss Briggs.”

The soft voice of Mrs. Andrews floated up into the surrey. Eleanor whipped around and found the dark-haired beauty and her husband approaching their conveyance.

“Well, hello, Mr. and Mrs. Andrews,” Marvella chirped. “You are both looking quite dapper this fine Sunday morning.”

Mrs. Andrews blushed prettily. “You’re kind, Marvella.” Her gaze shifted to Eleanor. “It’s a pleasure to see you again, Miss Briggs. I was wondering if you were free for lunch this afternoon. Mark and I would like to host you in our home if you’re agreeable.”

Eleanor’s heart pounded. Had God actually heard her feeble prayer? She swallowed. It was unlikely. Yet she felt a keen sense of gratitude.

“Oh, you’re too kind, Rebecca. But Miss Briggs was—oof!” Marvella squeaked and looked at her husband. “Now just what was that about, my dear?”

Eleanor looked at the Judge, who dropped a wink her way. “I think Miss Briggs is capable of answering for her own schedule.”

She could have given the man a hug. She glanced over at Carter, who was observing the whole fiasco with a bemused smile. Eleanor tipped her head toward the Andrewses, hoping he would understand her nonverbal question.

He nodded and gave her a little wave.

Relief rolled through her. “I would be delighted to join you for lunch, Mrs. Andrews.”

“Wonderful!” Mrs. Andrews smiled. “Our house is just a few blocks from here. It’s a lovely day for a walk.”

Eleanor turned to her hosts. Marvella’s mouth was clamped shut, but her eyes still sparkled. The Judge’s smile was wide and easy. “Go have fun with your friends, Eleanor.”

“Thank you.” She whispered and turned to get out of the surrey. Carter was there, his hand extended. She slipped her fingers into his grasp, tingles racing up her arm. Once she was on the ground, she snatched her hand back. “I apologize I won’t be able to join your family for lunch today.”

Carter grinned. “It’s quite all right, Ellie. Mom and Dad will miss your company, but I think time with Mark and Rebecca will be enjoyable for you. They’re two of my favorite people in Kalispell.”

“I’m glad to hear it.” Mark’s voice cut into their conversation. He shook Carter’s hand with a grin. “If you don’t mind, friend, we need to steal Miss Briggs.”

Eleanor bit her lips together as Carter held up his hands and stepped back as Mark Andrews offered his arm to her. “Are you ready?”

She nodded and rested her hand lightly on his arm. His wife leaned forward and grinned. “I’m so pleased this worked out.”

“I am too.” Excitement bubbled up into her voice. Maybe God had heard her prayer today. If so, it was the best one He’d answered in a long time.

The Andrewses’s house was cozy and warm. Rebecca and Mark—they had insisted on being called by their first names—made Eleanor feel welcome. Over their delicious lunch, they asked Eleanor questions about growing up on the East Coast. Rebecca even shared a few stories about growing up in Chicago. And Mark had them laughing with incidents out at his dad’s ranch when he was little.

Eleanor couldn’t remember a time when she felt so full, both physically and emotionally. She actually felt like she could become good friends with the Andrewses. And she hadn’t had good friends in a very long time. After the meal, Mark waved off Eleanor’s offer to do the dishes. “I do them on Sundays, and I know Rebecca has been itching to have time with you.”

His wife let out a laugh. “You’re making me sound obsessed.”

Eleanor laughed along with the couple. “I will confess, I’ve been longing to get to know you better too.”

“See?” Rebecca patted Mark on the hand. “She wants to be my friend.”

Mark plunged his hands into the soapy water and let out a chuckle. “Go have fun, you two. But if my wife starts grilling you, just say the word. She can get a bit intense.”

Rebecca stood. “Don’t listen to him, Eleanor. We are going to have a lovely time. Would you like to sit out back with me? It’s a small yard, but it is comfortable for an afternoon chat.”

“I would love that.” Eleanor followed her hostess out to their small yard, pleased to find a small swing close on the small back porch.

The two women sat and Rebecca ran her hand along the smooth wood of the swing. “Mark surprised me with this when we moved in.” She smiled. “Living in the city, I’d never had one. But there is something so soothing about being able to sit and swing. Almost like I’m a little girl again.”

Eleanor relaxed into the back of the swing. “I agree. The Brunswicks have a big one on their home porch. I think Mrs. Brunswick and I sat out there for hours, just enjoying the scenery.”

“Speaking of the Brunswicks”—Rebecca glanced at Eleanor—“I felt a little like we were walking into the middle of something at the end of service.”

Eleanor’s cheeks burned. “Well ...” She sighed. “Marvella got it in her head that I needed to have lunch with the Brunswicks this afternoon. She was just being Marvella, but I felt forced on them and couldn’t find a way out of the situation.”

Rebecca released a peal of laughter. “That sounds just like our friend. She means well. But I know it can be overwhelming from time to time.”

Eleanor let out a breath, thankful she hadn’t overstepped with her comment about Marvella. She didn’t want to be a gossip. “It’s true. And while I enjoy time with them, it’s still been a bit ... awkward between Carter and me since the dinner.”

Rebecca pushed the swing forward with her toe and the gentle sway caused Eleanor to relax even further. “I know we barely know each other, but I want to be your friend.” She smiled. “And if you want to talk about what happened, I’m here.”

I want to be your friend. Those were the same words Carter had said to her a few days ago. She’d told him it was impossible. But was it? Even if she didn’t believe in God like he did or like Rebecca did ... could they be friends? “I could use a friend. And please ...” She swallowed the lump in her throat. “Call me Ellie.”

“I’d be glad to, Ellie.” The other woman smiled.

“And thank you for your offer to discuss what happened at dinner. I’d rather not rehash all that. Carter has apologized and I’ve accepted. But ...” Eleanor rubbed her hands on her skirts. Why were her hands suddenly clammy? “I did have some questions about this morning’s sermon.”

Rebecca’s eyes lit up. “Oh, yes. Wasn’t it just marvelous?”

Eleanor bit her lip. “It was ... something.”

“That sounds like a serious kind of something.” Rebecca chuckled. “Did you have a question about Pastor Watkins’s message?”

Well, there was no time like the present to see if the woman before her really wanted to be her friend. “What makes you so certain that God exists and that He is who the Bible says He is?”

Rebecca paused, then let out a laugh. “Oh, Eleanor, you sound just like I did only a few months ago. I had so many complicated questions about the Lord.”

“I’m glad I’m not alone in that. And just so you know, Marvella has sung your praises. She thinks your conversion to Christianity was the most important thing I needed to know about you.”

“It is, in a way.” Rebecca slowed the swing and stood. “I’m going to go get my Bible. Is that all right with you?”

Eleanor nodded and her hostess disappeared inside. A few minutes later, she reappeared with a black leather book under her arm and a tray in her hands.

“Oh, let me help you.” Eleanor jumped up and took the tray from her hands. She was surprised to see a small plate of delicious-looking cookies and two glasses of lemonade.

“I thought we might need a treat with our conversation.” Rebecca sat back down on the swing.

Eleanor took a cookie and bit into it, sugary sweetness swirling on her tongue. “These are delicious, thank you.”

“Of course. Now. You asked how I’m so certain that God exists, right?”

Eleanor nodded. “And how you know that He is who the Bible says He is.”

Rebecca flipped through the thin pages of the Bible for a moment, then settled on a page. “At first, I was certain about God and the Bible because the people I loved and trusted promised me it was true. And in my unbelief, I figured that was enough. Like I could tag on to their faith.” She shook her head, tendrils of black hair framing her face. “But then I started reading the Word myself. I started seeing places in my life where God made Himself too real to ignore. As my faith grew stronger, the proof grew stronger too.”

Yes, she could believe that, even though it had been years since she’d read the Bible. “So you really believe that nothing happens by chance? That God ordered everything in place.”

“I do. I know some might think that unlikely, but for me it rings true. And again, I take it by faith. I believe the Bible is God’s Word. I have no doubt that He instructed His people who wrote it and they put down exactly what God wanted on the pages.” Rebecca pointed at the open Bible. “This verse especially struck me the first time I read it. ‘All scripture is given by inspiration of God, and is profitable for doctrine, for reproof, for correction, for instruction in righteousness: that the man of God may be perfect, thoroughly furnished unto all good works.’”

Eleanor leaned closer to Rebecca, reading the words again for herself. She chewed over the words for a few minutes then sat back, a frown on her face. “I suppose that makes sense. I will say, of late, when verses have been shared, they seem to speak to me.”

The smile that graced Rebecca’s face was gentle. She reached over and took Eleanor’s hand. “That’s because the Bible is God’s Word, and He says it’s living and true. He’s using it to assure you that He’s real ... that He exists.” She squeezed Eleanor’s hand tightly. “But do you want to know the best thing about the Word of God?”

Eleanor’s breath caught in her throat. All of a sudden, she desperately wanted to know what Rebecca was going to say. She nodded, unable to speak.

Her new friend’s grip tightened just a bit more. “It’s that Jesus wants you to know Him, Ellie. And better still, that He loves you.”

The words cracked into Eleanor’s heart and tears flooded her eyes. After everything she’d done and said ... could what Rebecca said be true?

Could Jesus still love her?