4. ‘Wildcat’

FOUR

‘WILDCAT'

FRANKIE

Lying in my bed, I'm afraid to get out of it. Yesterday's shitshow left me feeling raw and way too vulnerable, which are two emotions I try hard to avoid. Then to top it off, after just about every Devil's Handmaidens sister managed to spoon or cuddle with me, except the two ready to burst, the questions started getting deep and I was truly starting to panic; Taz faked going into labor. I was shocked because she actually seemed to be experiencing the beginning stages of labor. Then one of the prospects called Enforcer—and shit—our calm, crystal-loving sister became like her namesake: Tasmanian Devil. That colored hair of hers was flying all over. Poor Kitty didn't know what she did wrong until Taz got in her face and instead of explaining she immediately broke out sobbing.

The only good thing is it took the spotlight off me. When Enforcer and Teddy burst through the door, one look and the man looked at the boy-child and said… "Teddy, Momma's playing around again. Come on, let's get back to the dogs." Then they both turned around and left as fast as they got there. Everyone watched Taz, who was staring right at me. When I studied her face, she kinda giggled then winked at me. Motherfucker, she was faking to get them off my back. I rushed toward Taz, grabbing and pulling her into me as much as I could with her pregnant belly in the way. It was one of the nicest things anyone has ever done for me and I whispered it in her ear. She leaned over and whispered back to me.

"You haven't seen anything yet, Wildcat. Prepare—the wild winds are shifting, be strong, and lean on those around you, stay focused on the prize at the end, and never give up on your dreams."

The way she said it had the hair on the back of my neck standing up. I know Taz truly believes in her crystals, cards, incense, sage and everything else that is natural and earthy, but it isn't something I've ever gotten into. When she grabbed my hand and placed something heavy in it, I look down then I close my fingers and felt two stones.

"Black tourmaline is for protection, inner power, and confidence. Clear quartz for grounding, inner energy, and concentration. Always keep these on you. I've cleansed them but you can put them in that selenite bowl I gave you to be sure no negative energy from me passes down to you. I love you, Wildcat. We all do. Now, I got to go make peace with my man and man-child. Why did I pick such an astute male to be in my life when I already had Teddy? Though not complaining too much. Call me if you need anything."

She raised her hand and caressed my cheek then turned and walked out while our other sisters watched her. I remember vividly that Taz is not one for drama or large displays of anything. She is usually balanced and calm, so guess it's true what they say about the hormones of pregnancy.

One by one my club sisters make their way to leaving, giving me a hug, squeeze, or knuckle bump, trying to let me know I'm not alone. That's the thing about the Devil's Handmaidens club, it's about sisterhood, first and foremost, with our club sisters but then it extends to any woman who needs guidance or assistance. When it's only Tink, Glory, and Shadow, I gulp. Guess it's time to explain in-depth what freaked me out. Glory walks to the door, closing and locking it. Damn, our VP does pay attention, just hearing the locks makes me feel better, even with these women in the room. Doubt anyone would get past Shadow, but the deadliest one is probably Glory with Tink not far behind.

We all take a seat either on the huge extra-long couch or in a wingback chair. My hands are twisting together, well, that's until Tink grabs them, holding on tightly.

"Sister, there isn't anything that can destroy you unless you let it into your head to fester. Now, take some breaths. Zoey, get her some water. When you're ready, Wildcat, tell us what freaked you out and what might be heading our way. Hey, no judgment, sister. We can deal with anything if we know what it is. I know some of it, but let's start at the beginning."

So after a couple of minutes that's exactly what I do. I try my damnedest to leave nothing out, no matter how painful or soul wrecking it is. I must give Tink, Glory, and Shadow kudos because no one, not even our enforcer, interrupts me at any time. They just sit close to me, always making sure one or the other has a hand on mine or bumping my shoulder or when Shadow sits on the floor, pulla my legs around her, and hugs me at a particular hard moment in my story. I feel Tink's eyes on me every time I speak Malcolm's name. It is kind of eerie because those green eyes seem to be looking into my soul.

Not sure for how long I talk, but when I finish a steaming cup of tea is placed in front of me. When I look up, Glory gives me a soft smile. I know the stories of these women but to have both Tink and Glory running this club, there are no two women who fit together better. Shadow kneels in front of me, squeezing my knees before standing up. Tink is on the move too, walking to the small kitchen, opening the fridge, and grabbing some waters. Then she heads directly to the table.

Everyone follows our prez's lead and heads over to the small dinette. The silence is relaxing and for some reason I feel lighter. Maybe from getting all that shit out by telling my story, knowing whatever Tink has to say it's not just for the good of our club. The Devil's Handmaidens is a one-percent motorcycle club. But our mission is to rescue those being victimized or abused. Funny how each and every one of us in the club has a past that includes being a victim of some kind of abuse. Who better to understand the effects than a prior victim? Though we are also survivors since we as a group can work together to help other victims become survivors.

"Wildcat, we all know how hard that was. Thank you for sharing with us. Not sure why we continue to attract trouble when all we ever want to do is live a good life while helping others. Saying that, this is what I think our next steps should be. First, we get Raven to start going over some of the cameras in town. I know you don't have names and stuff like that, so maybe our technology specialist will be able to give us an idea about who we are dealing with. This is the hard part, Wildcat, for you. I think it's in everyone's best interest if you reach out to your family. Give them a warning. Also maybe give Malcolm a heads-up. Now, hold on, sister. Before you lose your shit, think about it if the roles were reversed. Would Malcolm leave you hanging when trouble was knocking at his door? From what you've told us about him, I'm going to guess he's one of the ‘nice guys.' Try to look past whatever is holding you back from him. He is not the enemy sister. That's all I'm saying."

I know she's right, that's what's pissing me off though. Not saying it's going to happen, but with me telling my story and putting the truth out there, just maybe I'll be able to move forward. Though my club helps victims out, I want to do even more. It's a secret dream of mine but, and I hate to even think it, just maybe something will come of my application and I can become a deputy for Timber-Ghost. That is, if Sheriff George thinks I'm the right candidate for the job.

"Now that's the Wildcat we love to see. That grin on your face with the fire in your eyes. Whatcha thinking about there, sister?"

My head jerks as I realize I went off into a daydream with my eyes wide open. I lean back, shifting my eyes to Shadow, who's smirking my way. Yeah, our enforcer has come a long way, but sometimes she's still like a kid trying to mess with others. I know she's trying to take my mind off all this unexpected bullshit that's landed in my lap, and for that I so love her.

"Shadow, feel the same about you every time I see you and Panther together or notice that special dreamy look you get in your eyes when you think about him. But more than that, I see how far you've come and that's what I want in my life, though that can't happen until all this bullshit is over and done. You hear me?"

Well, it wasn't bad enough I had to relive that time with my club sisters, but then I reached out to my family to have them freaking the ever-loving hell out. I could hear it in my parents' voices, though they tried to hide it. So I finally broke down, after all this time, to tell them where I was and what I was doing with my life. They told me somehow, someway, they would be out here so we can figure this out together. Guess Malcolm had told my parents one of the assholes from that day ended up in the emergency room from taking a beating in the prison where he was serving time. That news didn't bother me as much as me not knowing my parents still had some kind of relationship and contact with Malcolm. I'm not mad though, I'm more sad than anything. This whole situation is messed up and seems to be on a downward spiral. Only time will tell. Told my parents to let Malcolm know whenever they either see or speak to him what was going on in Montana, though I asked—no, begged—them not to give him any specifics. Can't undo that broken road, that's for sure. He made his choice .

That's the last thought I have before I fall into a restless sleep, not knowing tomorrow will be bringing my past to meet my present. And what a meeting it will turn out to be.