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16. Chapter 16

Chapter 16

Wayden

" S cent marking is an integral part of pack life. The alpha's scent brings comfort and a sense of belonging to his pack members. This practice seems to unite the pack and…"

Wayden's fingers hovered over the keys as his gaze was dragged to the bedroom door. Again. He should be working, but he couldn't fucking stop thinking about what Blaine had said and how it had made Wayden feel. If it weren't for the damn consequences of fucking Blaine without protection, Wayden would have been in there, giving Blaine what he wanted. Wayden's fucking wolf was urging him to go back in there and take the omega. Blaine was fucking offering himself to him. He should go in there and claim him as his own… fuck the consequence.

They could figure it out if something happened. They could fall in love… Wayden frowned at that thought.

Why the fuck was he thinking about love?

He couldn't gamble with his heart again… never again. He couldn't go through that torment of loving someone, only to have them break his heart. To put it simply, he didn't trust Blaine, not where his heart was concerned. But he couldn't sit there in the cold until his research was over.

They had to find a solution.

Go fuck him. That was the fucking solution.

Wayden shook his head. He took a deep breath and tried to focus on his research. He worked for a couple more hours and then dragged himself to bed when it got too cold to bear. He slid into bed and resisted the urge to pull Blaine into his arms. That would only lead to him wanting to fuck him. Wayden was already on edge. Touching Blaine would only make it worse.

Wayden turned away, his back to Blaine's back and courted sleep, which never came. Wayden was out of that bed by first light. He quickly got cleaned up and he was out of the shuttle in minutes. He walked to the main house. The snow had lessened a bit, and it was easy to move around. A lot of the pack members were out and about. They waved to him as he walked past. Wayden entered the main hut and was surprised to find Escala sitting in front of the fire pit… alone. It was rare to see him alone.

Escala was always surrounded by his pack, so Wayden had never noticed how lonely the alpha looked. Wayden wondered why Escala wasn't bonded. He needed someone to help him carry the load.

Wayden moved towards him. Escala looked up as he got closer.

"Morning," Wayden said.

"Morning. You don't look like you slept."

"I could say the same about you. Why do you look weird today?" Wayden asked as he sat down. "I've never seen you look like this."

Escala shrugged. "Days are not the same. Today I woke up with all my yearnings on the surface. I guess you could say I'm working through them."

"You're sad," Wayden said.

"I'm not sad. I'm just evaluating my life."

"Is there an omega somewhere in that evaluation? Why are you not bonded?" Wayden asked.

"I'm waiting for my true mate," Escala said.

Wayden laughed, then stopped when he realised that Escala was serious. "True mates are a thing of the past. They haven't existed in…"

"A hundred years. I know. But that doesn't mean mine is not out there. I just have to wait. He or she will come my way."

"Here?" Wayden asked.

Escala groaned. "Maybe I am a little sad."

Wayden laughed again. "Just choose an omega you're compatible with. It's not that deep. I'm sure there are a few in your pack who'd want to get bonded to their alpha. Choose one."

"They are plenty," Escala commented with a sigh.

"And?"

"I'm an aggressive alpha. It doesn't work that way for us."

"Don't tell me that shit is true." Wayden stared at the alpha stunned. "I thought my brother was lying. He's been spewing that nonsense for a long time."

"Your brother?" Escala looked up at him. "Your brother is an aggressive alpha."

"Yes, and he's been single for as long as I can remember. I thought he was lying, that he just wanted to be alone because aggressive alphas just have to be extra. They rule the damn planet so what else can't they do."

"You sound a little bitter over there. Is there something you want to talk about?" Escala asked softly, even though his scent was thickening. Wayden rolled his eyes. He had a damn aggressive alpha for a brother. No other alpha's scent was going to faze him.

"Relax. My brother and I have a weird relationship. And before you ask: I don't want to talk about it." Wayden rubbed the back of his neck. "You're saying the true mate shit is true? He can't be with any omega besides his true mate?"

"He can. He probably chooses not to, because he knows it's not going to satisfy him. Most omegas can't handle an aggressive alpha. Aggressive alphas demand too much from an omega. We can only have a successful relationship with our true mates. The rest just feels like a chore. And it's not fair to string an omega along when you know the truth."

"What about your heat? Don't tell me you spend your heat alone." Wayden knew it was possible. He'd done it many times. But wasn't it difficult for aggressive alphas? He'd heard some couldn't spend a single day of their heats alone.

"I have sex. Spending my heats alone is out of the question."

"And you're not bonded by mistake and don't have little Escalas running around?" Wayden had barely stopped himself from knotting Blaine every time they'd had sex during Blaine's heat. It was the hardest thing he'd ever had to do.

How did Escala do it? Was there a trick Wayden didn't know about?

Fuck. He needed something… a trick… whatever method Escala used. Wayden didn't think he could spend another night in that damn shuttle without losing his mind.

"No. I'm careful and we have herbs to prevent any unwanted pregnancies."

What?

"You do?"

"Why do you sound so surprised? We have everything we need here. There's nothing the land doesn't provide."

"I thought…" Wayden shook his head. Fuck what he'd thought. He needed the damn herb. "Can you give me some? I need it." Wayden more than needed it. At this point he would die if he slept in the same bed with Blaine and didn't touch him.

Escala laughed at him this time. "I guess you really didn't sleep last night."

"You can say that again."

Escala laughed harder. He got to his feet and dropped firewood into the fire pit. The fire crackled, the sound soothing. Escala returned to his chair with a sigh. "I'm guessing you're not ready to claim him if you're asking for the herb. He's a gorgeous omega. What's holding you back? Any alpha would have claimed him by now."

"I know. I just…" Wayden went silent, trying to think of the right words. "We have a complicated relationship."

"Complicated? That sounds like an excuse."

"You don't know Blaine. He makes everything complicated. I've never met an omega like him. I never know what he's going to say or do. Every day with him is like… living here. You never know what the wilderness might bring. It's a constant struggle for survival."

"It's beautiful though, isn't it?" Escala smiled.

Wayden found himself smiling too. "Yes, it is. It's breathtaking."

"You sound like you're in love with him," Escala said. Though his words sounded more like a question than a statement. Wayden didn't know how to answer that. Rationally, he knew how he felt about Blaine. He felt it every time he was with the omega, but he ignored his feelings because he wasn't going down that road again. His heart was going to stay right where it was – locked up in his chest, not in someone else's hands, no matter how much he wanted them. And he did want Blaine. Wayden didn't know how it had happened. He was fucking falling.

"It's not that simple," Wayden said.

Escala laughed. "There you go again with your excuses. You need to trust how you feel. Something that beautiful can't be bad."

That was the problem, wasn't it? He didn't trust Blaine. No matter how hard he tried to, he just couldn't.

"If you want him, you'll have to fight to make it work." Escala slapped Wayden on his shoulder and got to his feet. "I'll get you the herb. Maybe start small, right?"

"Yeah," Wayden said. He touched his chest to quell the erratic beat of his heart. Was he really going to do this?

He must be stupid to think that he could trust the little devil. Even so… Wayden knew he couldn't keep his hands off the omega. He wanted him.

Start small, Wayden told himself as he got to his feet and went in search of food in the cooking station.

Escala returned a few minutes later to give him a small pouch. "It takes forty-eight hours to be effective. Good luck," Escala mumbled, just as the door opened again and the pack members came in, Blaine in tow.

Their eyes collided, and Wayden felt something warm and tingly in his chest. Fuck. Blaine quickly looked away, following his omega friends. They went to the table and sat down. Wayden didn't know what to make of his behaviour.

Was Blaine still angry with him? Wayden asked himself as he found a spot at the table. Their conversation last night hadn't ended well. The whole thing was a mess. Maybe he could have handled it better last night, instead of being offended by Blaine shoving him off him.

Escala looked from him to Blaine, a knowing smile on his lips.

Wayden silently groaned.

More pack members came in and breakfast was quickly served. Everyone ate with gusto, the celebrations from last night continuing. And it sounded like he and Blaine had missed some very interesting stuff because they had their own weird shit going on. Wayden shook his head, not wanting to think about that. He already had so much to think about. The damn pouch burned a hole in his pocket, scaring the shit out of him.

Start small, he thought, trying to convince himself. But he knew there was nothing small about this. He was putting his heart on the line again.

Wayden sighed.

He stood up and walked out of the hut, having lost his appetite. He might as well get his work done. The sooner he was done with his research, the sooner they could leave. But that meant he wouldn't get to see Blaine again. Wayden wasn't his alpha, so…

Shit.

Wayden heard footsteps behind him. He looked over his shoulder to see Blaine coming up behind him. Wayden stopped and waited for the omega. His breath caught as Blaine came to a stop a few paces from him. Wayden's heart did a funny little dance that made him feel tingly all over.

"What are we doing today?" Blaine asked, staring at his feet. "I thought if we get our work done, we could leave soon. I need to go home."

Wayden gasped, feeling like he'd been sucker punched. Why did Blaine's words fucking hurt? He'd thought the same thing a few minutes ago. He wanted to be done with his research so they could…

What? Go their separate ways.

Wayden's heart ached, just thinking about it. Fuck. What did he fucking want? He was thinking in circles.

"Home? Why do you need to go there?" Wayden asked, ignoring the other stuff. He didn't want to think about them parting ways.

Blaine blushed. He looked away for such a long while that Wayden thought he wouldn't answer him. "I need something to help with the… you know. I need to feel like myself again."

Wayden reached for the pouch in his pocket and handed it to Blaine. "Here. Escala gave me some herbs. They help to prevent any unwanted pregnancies. It's uhhh… you don't have to take it if you don't want to. But I thought… We still have a few months here. I can try to fast track some things, but I can't do more than that."

Blaine stared at the pouch for a few seconds before he reached for it. "Let me know what you have planned for today," Blaine said, walking away from him.

Was that it? No discussion, nothing? Wayden didn't even know if Blaine was going to take the herbs or not.

Fuck, that little shit. He was going to drive him crazy. Wayden shook his head and made his way to the shuttle to get the recording equipment. The day was warmer, so he decided to conduct the interviews outside. He found a clearing a few paces from the lake and set up his equipment. Blaine came and joined him. They didn't talk much as they got everything ready. Blaine seemed less pissed. He talked to him calmly about what they needed to do and asked questions when he didn't understand. Most of all, he did everything Wayden told him to do without any complaint, which was a rare sight.

He must really want to leave, Wayden thought as he watched Blaine. He'd warned him, though. His fieldwork sometimes took months or a year. It was time consuming work. Wayden wondered if Blaine regretted coming here at all. It had been an impulsive move on his part. Wayden doubted Blaine had thought it through. And now… now they were in a fucking mess. And the tension between them… fuck.

Wayden dragged his eyes from Blaine and tried to focus on his work. But that was hard to do when he couldn't stop thinking about Blaine and their situation. By the time they were done with the interview, Wayden barely remembered what he'd asked some of the pack members.

"Are you okay?" Blaine asked while they were packing up.

"I'm fine. I'm just tired," he said.

"Yeah, I know," Blaine said not looking at him. "You didn't sleep well last night."

Shit. Even though that was true, Wayden didn't want Blaine to think that it was because of him.

"I…" Wayden said, but Blaine shook his head.

"You'll have the bed to yourself tonight," Blaine said.

"You can't…"

"I'm not going to sleep in the cold or anything. The omegas are going to spend the night with Green to help him with his cub and give him a break. It's another thing they do. I thought I should join them and observe what they do. It could be good for your research and stuff."

Wayden stared at Blaine, stunned. Blaine was doing it again – going out of his way to help Wayden with his research. Wayden's fingers itched to reach for Blaine and hug him. Wayden couldn't believe how thoughtful the omega was. Wayden could fucking kiss him.

"Yes, that would help my research," Wayden said.

"Okay," Blaine said, walking away.

"Blaine!" Wayden called. Blaine turned and looked at him. "Thank you."

Blaine's cheeks reddened, but he looked away too fast for Wayden to enjoy the moment. "I'm only doing my job."

"I know," Wayden said, a smile spreading his lips.

"Is there anything else?" Blaine asked, turning to look at Wayden again. Wayden shook his head as he stared at him. A sensual tension swirled around them as they continued to stare at each other. And for a second Wayden felt like they were the only two people there. "I'm going to… uhh…" Blaine said awkwardly pointing at the main hut.

"Of course," Wayden said. He watched Blaine leave, his heart beating a thousand times a minute.

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