5. TATE

5

TATE

"You look conflicted."

I'd just barely had a moment to register the feel of my brother's hand on my shoulder before he leaned in and pointed out my predicament.

"Is it that obvious?"

After what happened last week when my brothers and I went to the lake house with Wyatt, I'd stopped being surprised by Liam's ability to observe what was going on around him.

Whether other people might have known what was going through my head or not, I didn't doubt Liam knew what was weighing on my mind. I wasn't doing anything to hide what had captured my interest from the start of the wedding festivities.

Liam removed his hand from my shoulder, stood beside me, and countered, "What's the dilemma? From where I'm standing, it appears you're terrified she might disappear if you look away."

He wasn't entirely wrong about that.

Wyatt and Rhea had chosen to have the wedding ceremony on Rhea's family farm. Or, technically, I guess they'd gotten married on the Westwood campus.

As it turned out, they'd decided to say their vows to one another on the piece of land that brought them together. It had started as part of her family's farm, and in a deal brokered between her father and ours, it wound up being Westwood's in the end.

And from the moment I stood up with Cooper and Liam beside Wyatt on the most important day of his life, I'd been stealing glances at Ava. She had been sitting in the same row as my parents, sandwiched between my mom and Skye.

Our eyes had locked on one another several times throughout the ceremony, and while I knew what was going through my mind, I couldn't quite get a read on Ava. She wasn't the same as she used to be—something for which I had only myself to blame.

The Ava I used to know would have been sending flirty looks my way the entire time. The Ava I saw this afternoon matched the one from the rehearsal dinner last night. She was unsure, unglued, and uncomfortable around me.

I wanted to kick myself for doing this to her. So much of her spirit was still intact whenever she was interacting with others, but when it came to me, it was gone.

I'd done that.

I'd destroyed the relationship we used to have.

And it had been killing me ever since.

Now that we were at The Westwood Hotel, where Wyatt and Rhea had held the reception, I was no longer stealing glances at Ava. The truth was that I hadn't taken my eyes off her.

Her light brown hair with its heavy blonde highlights that typically fell just an inch or two past her collarbone was pulled up in an elegant twist, leaving her slender neck and delicate jaw fully visible. Her features—everything from her eyes and her lips to her nose and her cheeks—could all be described as soft and attractive. Pretty. She was so pretty. And her body? It was currently covered by a full-length gown, but the bodice of the dress fit her snug and showed off her fit form. I already knew the legs and ass beneath the skirt of the dress were sexy and toned, the result of years of dance.

I continued to keep my focus on her as I inhaled deeply with my hands shoved in the pocket of my pants. "I thought I knew how much I missed her."

Liam huffed. If anyone could understand that predicament, it was him. "And yet, you're still standing here."

Nodding slowly, I confessed, "It's hitting me hard, man. I thought I knew, and I'm realizing I didn't have a clue how much not having her in my life, not even her texts or calls, for more than a year impacted me. There's so much tension between the two of us, and somehow, I feel like I can breathe easier just knowing she's this close again."

Liam's voice was slightly downtrodden when he returned, "I can only imagine how that must feel." A beat later, he asked, "Have you spoken to her? I noticed there wasn't much conversation between the two of you last night."

I probably should have directed my attention to my brother, but I was transfixed by Ava. She was on the dance floor, and she looked like she was having the time of her life. Then again, any time Ava was dancing, she was in another element. It was like something else took over her as she got lost in the music and movements of her body.

"We spoke briefly," I admitted. "I walked her to her car."

"And?"

"And we agreed to put our differences aside today for the sake of Wyatt and Rhea."

There was a long pause. I could feel Liam's eyes on me, but I couldn't bring myself to look at him. "How exactly would you say you're doing with accomplishing that? Because I've got to tell you, it seems like you haven't put aside your differences at all. It looks like the two of you have avoided each other altogether."

"I'm working on that."

"By standing here with your hands in your pockets?" he questioned me. Liam turned fully to face me, clapped his hand on my shoulder again, and said, "Don't screw this up, Tate. You'll regret it for the rest of your life."

My brother squeezed my shoulder and walked off, his own misery enough for him to contend with on a day like today.

I remained in the same spot, continuing to watch Ava and not caring who saw.

Last night, I'd convinced myself I'd done something good by talking to her before she left. I'd led myself to believe it'd all be fine today, that everything would be back to normal. I had hoped to ease us back to some place good, but I hadn't taken any action to get us back to being a version of the people we used to be toward one another.

It wasn't even close to being that.

Liam was right. Ava and I hadn't exactly put our differences aside; we were just avoiding each other.

I needed to do something about it. I needed to make a statement to her that told her it was going to be okay between us. Maybe we wouldn't fix everything before she went back to finish up the final week of the tour, but at least she could be reassured it'd be better once she returned.

Avoidance was no longer an option. As the song began to wind down, I decided this was the moment. The upbeat vibe of the fast-paced song that had been playing was dwindling as a slow song flowed in to take its place.

If what I'd seen every other time that had happened throughout the evening was going to happen again, it would mean Ava would head to the bar and grab a drink.

Ava didn't normally drink. I'd spent years learning everything I could about her. She mostly avoided alcohol.

But tonight was different, and I didn't have to pretend not to know why.

She'd had three drinks already, and for someone her size, it had to be affecting her.

Before she could get too far, I moved. Ava hadn't made it even halfway across the dance floor before I reached for her wrist and stopped her.

Surprise washed over her expression, her body tensing. "Tate."

"Can I have this dance, Ava?"

Confusion marred her features. "But you… You don't dance."

"Sure, I do."

"Since when?"

"Today?"

Ava licked her beautiful lips as she assessed me, my eyes dropping to them and my fingers tightening slightly around her wrist. "There's a room full of other women for you to dance with."

"But I want to dance with you."

"Why?"

"A couple of reasons, the first being that you and I came to an agreement last night that we were going to put aside our differences today for the sake of Wyatt and Rhea."

"Yes, but I don't feel like I've been doing anything to indicate I have a problem with you," she reasoned.

"Not accepting a dance with me might say the opposite."

Recognizing she couldn't turn me down now if she intended to stay true to her word, Ava yanked slightly on her wrist and turned her body fully to face mine.

I smiled, stepped forward, and slid my arm around her waist. We moved our bodies to the music for several moments, and I relished the feel of having her so close to me again. I savored the feminine scent of her, appreciated the closeness of our bodies, and took immense pleasure in having her hands on me again, one resting on my outer shoulder the other being held firmly against my own. "See? I told you I could dance."

"And yet you've never done it with me before now. What were your other reasons?"

Ignoring the edge of bitterness in her tone about me never dancing with her before now, I asked, "My other reasons?"

"For wanting to dance with me. You said you had a couple of reasons. What are they?"

For the first time since I'd entered the ballroom and caught sight of Ava, I felt confident enough I could look away and she wouldn't go anywhere. I looked around the room, focused my attention on her again, and revealed, "I'm reasonably confident you're the best dancer at this wedding. As you already noted, I don't dance very often?—"

"You don't dance ever ," she corrected me.

I chuckled. "Fine. But that's all the more reason for me to want to dance with you. If I'm going to do it, I might as well do it with someone who knows what they're doing."

"This is slow dancing, Tate. It's not difficult."

My arm tightened around her waist, tugging her closer. I could have done this with her years ago. I'd avoided it, because I wouldn't have been able to resist her. No doubt she would have done her best to seduce me. I was a fool to have thought that was a wise move. "We've got to start somewhere, don't we?"

As the song faded and blended into the next, she sighed. "I guess."

Ava spent the next few seconds dancing in my arms but doing it while avoiding looking at me. It was like she was terrified of what might happen if we made eye contact while being this close to one another.

"Do you want to know the biggest reason I wanted to dance with you?"

In an instant, her eyes were back on mine. "Why?"

The silence stretched between us as I studied her, appreciating the curiosity in her breathtaking stare. "I missed you."

Everything changed in that instant. Her fingers twitched in my hand as her lips parted. But it was the look in her eyes that said it all. She was experiencing conflicting emotions. It was as though part of her was yearning for what I was saying to be the truth while the other part of her was heartbroken to hear it.

"Forgive me, Tate, because I'm a bit confused. I was away for a long time, and I missed Wyatt, Cooper, and Liam, but I don't want to dance with men who are like brothers to me."

My brows drew together. "I'm not suggesting that you do."

"So, I guess I don't understand why you would want to dance with a woman who's like a sister to you."

Confusion turned to horror. Did Ava think I looked at her like a sister? "What?"

She swallowed hard, her emotions getting the best of her. "I didn't get it. All these years, I couldn't understand why you wanted nothing to do with me, but you made it clear last night."

"What did I do last night?"

"You told me I was part of this family."

My body had stopped moving. I continued to hold Ava in my arms, but I couldn't believe what I was hearing. "Ava, I do not look at you like a sister."

She nodded. "You said it. You said I was part of this family."

"I consider Rhea and Skye to be part of this family, too. Do you think that means Wyatt sees Rhea as his sister? Do you think Skye isn't any different to Cooper than Ivy or Jules?"

"Obviously, they don't view them that way. That's why we're here today, Tate. Wyatt is married now, and Cooper got engaged. They both made it clear they felt differently. So, I guess, if what you're telling me is the case and you don't see me that way, then it's me." Her voice sounded so small and broken. Devastation was dripping from every word. "You're just not interested in me like that, and I read into everything far more than I should have."

What had I done to this woman?

"That's not true, either."

Ava's gaze became unfocused, like she had just been slapped across the face and was seeing stars. "I don't understand. You've made it painfully obvious you have no intention of pursuing me, and the moment I think I figure it out, you're telling me that what I think is the case isn't true. I'm sorry, but this makes no sense. You've repeatedly turned me down. What else am I supposed to believe?"

"That I'm not perfect. That I've made mistakes. That I have reasons for turning you down, but I can promise you they have nothing to do with me not being wildly attracted to you."

There was a glimmer of hope. It was small, barely there, but I saw it. Ava remained silent, clearly attempting to process all that I'd just shared. I started dancing with her again.

A few beats later, she asked, "What are your reasons?"

I shook my head. "This isn't the place to talk about it."

She returned a nod of understanding as a wave of determination became apparent in her features. Her eyes drifted to my neck as she tugged her hand out of mine. She flattened her palm against my chest, allowed both hands to drift up over my shoulders and toward either side of my throat. Ava stayed like that for a few moments before she began fidgeting with my collar. She leaned in closer and put her mouth at my ear and continued to adjust my collar around my tie. "If only you had someone to do this for you. Every morning before you go to work. Imagine how nice it would be to have someone fix your tie for you."

Relief swept through me. I wanted to throw my fist in the air and celebrate. I had her back.

Now, I needed to make sure I didn't do anything to screw it up.