Chapter 12

My stomach is in knots as I wait for him to come back. I have absolutely no idea what he"s planning, but there"s a part of me ready for it all. The conversation we just had was the best one to date, because I"ve finally been able to let what I want out of this free. Since he hasn"t been here, we haven"t had discussions, we haven"t had time to. But this is the beginning, and we all have to start somewhere. When he comes back in, he"s got something behind his back. The question is asked by the screwing together of my eyebrows instead of words.

"I bought you something today," he explains. "I saw you looking at them, and the happiness across your face mesmerized me. You do so much for everyone else, and I wanted to do something for you. So, here's you a bouquet that doesn"t die, no matter how much you try to kill it." He brings a dozen of the crocheted flowers out from behind his back.

I don"t know what to say. "Oh my gosh, Shane. I didn"t tell you I liked them so you"d buy it for me."

"I realize that about you, realized it the first damn day. You don"t do shit just so I feel obligated. I like that about you."

Not able to help myself, I reach up on tiptoes and plant my lips on his. His mouth immediately takes control of the kiss, opening my lips against his. His tongue invades and captures, loots, and plunders like a pirate at sea. I give it all over to him. I"ve always wanted a man who can show me everything I"ve been missing at the same time, give me the confidence to take what I need. Throwing my arms around his neck, I stand on tiptoe and give myself over to him. He wraps his strong grip around my waist, pulling me into his toned body.

Wrenching his mouth from mine, he directs me to tilt my head back, and noses up to my chin, before kissing at my pulse point. Holding on tightly, I give myself over to him, letting him do it all. Allowing him to show me everything I"ve wanted, and never had.

Reaching down, he cups my ass with his palms, before pulling me up into his arms. Wrapping my legs around his waist, I hold on, digging my fingernails into the nape of his neck. My heart is pounding and we"re quickly getting out of hand. He walks us over to the couch, laying me down, and propping his body up over mine. "Teach me all your ways." I give him a wink, opening my arms to him.

"I"d fucking love to."

When he dips his chin, Rachel"s loud cries ring out, pulling us out of the heated passion haze we"re in. Sitting up, I wipe off my mouth, exhaling deeply. "I"ll go, while you take care of that." I point toward where the evidence of his desire is prominent.

"Yeah," he winces. "I"m gonna need just a few minutes."

Walking quickly to Rachel"s room, I run a hand through my hair. "Hey sweetie, I"m here..."

-----

"He bought you a bouquet of crocheted flowers?" Hayley asks as we sit in the library, waiting for story time to start.

"Yes. Do you think I"m looking too deeply into it? He was probably doing it to be nice, right?" I wrinkle my nose up in question.

"I wouldn"t immediately go there. I think he did it because he wanted to, not because he felt like he had to. Hell, I wish my husband cared enough to buy me a bouquet of crocheted flowers." She laughs. "I"m about to ask a personal question, and you can tell me to fuck off if you want. Have you and Shane consummated your marriage yet? He"s a hottie."

"He is definitely a hottie. No, we haven"t. Not yet, and we got seriously close the other night."

"Are you waiting for any reason, or has it just not happened?" She asks, leaning in close.

"We haven"t been waiting for a reason. He was very clear when we got married that he wanted to have a physical relationship, but he worked so much the few weeks I was here, we didn"t have a chance. Now that they"re off overtime, we can spend time together, and get to know one another." I"m excited at the possibility.

"So, are you open to having a physical relationship with him while you build the emotional?" Leave it to Hayley to get to the heart of the matter.

"Yes, yes I am, because Shane is fucking hot. He"s my husband, and I have every right to enjoy the body he has underneath that uniform."

She giggles. "Damn right. They"re all pretty hot under those uniforms."

Truer words have never been spoken.

------

I pick Rachel up and hold her over my head, before blowing raspberries on her stomach. I put her on the changing table, and then do it again. She"s started really responding to a lot of stimuli now, especially when me and Shane are the ones playing with her.

"Where y"all at?" Speaking of Shane.

"In Rachel"s room. I"m changing her."

When he comes in, that quickening of my heart happens like it has been lately. He"s dressed all in black, having gone out to perform a raid with the SWAT team. "It"s been a rough night." He sighs heavily. "One of the guys had to be taken to the hospital."

Oh my God. "You"re okay though, right?"

"Yeah, I came home in one piece, and I"ll live to see another day." He says, but there"s no emotion in his voice, and that scares me more than anything. "I"m going to go take a shower."

"Okay. Take as long as you need."

I hurry through the rest of Rachel"s nighttime routine, knowing that with clean clothes, a fresh diaper, and a full belly, she should be out for the count.