30. Skye

"Skye is that you?" It was late afternoon and Skye had just returned home from work. He slipped off his tie and untucked his shirt, starting to unbutton it.

"Yeah, babe, I'm home," he said. He was exhausted, like always, but he was glad to hear River's voice, and happy to be home. "You okay?" he called into the bathroom.

"Yeah, I'm fine," his husband called back. "I'll be out in a minute."

Skye finished unbuttoning his shirt and slid it off, before slipping into sweatpants and a T-shirt, then propping up some pillows and positioning himself on the bed. He rested his head back and closed his eyes. A second later he heard the door to the bathroom open, but his eyes stayed closed.

"Hey," he heard his husband say, in a tone he hadn't heard in a very long time. And that got his attention. His eyes opened and his jaw dropped at the same time that his cock began to twitch, and instantly harden. There was River, leaning against the doorframe, one knee bent and an arm above his head, in nothing but the skimpiest, tightest, bright orange silk bikini underwear he'd ever seen in his life. Skye's mouth was watering and his heart was racing. Goddamn this was the hottest thing he'd ever seen.

Their sex life had been almost non existent the last several months. River had been so sick and in so much pain he rarely felt up for doing anything, and Skye never pushed him. He'd gotten used to pleasuring himself when the need got too severe, but it was, of course, not the same as indulging in his husband. Having River's hand on his cock, River's lips on his bare skin, their naked bodies pressed together. Burying himself inside his husband and hearing the sounds he made. Feeling River tight and warm and wonderful around him. God his cock was getting harder just thinking about it.

He knew River missed him too, wanted him, but pain had a way of dulling all the other senses and River was dealing with so many things that made it difficult for him to want sex, to enjoy sex. It was yet another thing that his chronic illnesses had robbed them of. And it sucked.

"Please don't tease me, because this is not funny," Skye said, his gaze roaming over River's body, his cock throbbing now, already leaking precum. And from the looks of it, River's was doing the same. "God, you're beautiful."

River laughed. "I'm not teasing you," he said walking closer to his husband slowly, his gloriously hard cock barely contained in his skimpy underwear. He climbed onto Skye and straddled him. "Like what you see?" he asked when he noticed Skye staring not at his eyes, but at his crotch.

"Jesus, yes," Skye said, and River laughed again.

"Kiss me," he said, and Skye did. He let River pull his shirt up and off, and they kissed again. Skye slid his hands under River's silken underwear, feeling the warm, firm, soft skin beneath the material, and God it was heaven. They both moaned, and River pressed further into him, their cocks grinding against each other's, both seeking friction.

"I want you naked," River whispered, his voice low and husky. He rolled off his husband and onto the bed, sliding his underwear off and waiting for Skye to undress, and then he was back on top of him.

Skye took River into his arms and kissed him tenderly, rolling River over slowly onto his back and drawing their bodies close, feeling his husband's hard on pressing against his, and moaning once more into his mouth, shaking as their naked bodies melded.

"Oh, River," Skye whispered. And he was almost in tears. "I've missed you so much."

"Me, too, Skye," his husband replied, as they continued to kiss.

It wasn't long, though, before River had to pull away, out of breath. "Sorry," he said. "It doesn't take much for me to get worn out."

"It's okay," Skye said, stroking his arm, and pressing their foreheads together, keeping their bodies pressed close, their dicks still touching, their legs wrapped around each other. "We can slow down."

River smiled. "I'm sorry it's been so long, Skye," he said softly, catching his breath.

"What? No, it hasn't been that long," Skye said, waving him off.

"Skye, I know you haven't been asking because you know I feel like crap," River said. "And I do feel like crap. But I also know it's been almost three weeks. And I am sorry."

"It's okay, Riv," Skye said sincerely. "I know you love me."

"I do," River said. Then he took both of their cocks into his hand and began to stroke them in tandem as he kissed Skye again and again.

River

River's heart soared as he heard his husband whimper and moan over and over and press against him, saying his name and sliding his tongue into his mouth. And God, it felt so. Damn. Good. River hadn't been this turned on in a long time, and he missed his husband so much.

But it was over in an instant as his heart started racing, and he gasped, pulling away from Skye and closing his eyes, trying to take deep breaths in and out to calm it.

"Your heart?" Skye asked.

He nodded, took a few more breaths in and out, and waited.

And waited.

And waited.

Finally, after what seemed like forever, and feeling like his heart was going to leap out of his chest, it stopped.

"It's over," he said, opening his eyes.

"God, that scares me every time," Skye said, leaning in to kiss him. "Do we need to be done?"

"I don't want to be," River said, gazing into his husband's eyes, earnestly. He was so over this. So over not being able to have sex with his husband as often as they wanted to. As often as they needed to. They needed each other. They needed this time to connect, to be intimate, and River hated that his illness was taking it away from them. That he had to deny Skye what he needed yet again. What they both needed and wanted. And this time it didn't have anything to do with his sexual trauma.

"I don't want to hurt you," Skye said, stroking his cheek.

"The sex isn't what caused it, Skye, it happens randomly. I could be sitting here, and it wouldn't matter."

"But it wears you out. How are you feeling?"

"Like I want to keep trying."

"Okay," Skye said. And he kissed River again. His lips, his jaw, leaving marks on his neck, his collarbone, and making his way down his body, licking and sucking on his nipples, River moaned as his husband worshiped his body.

"Oh God." His hips jerked as Skye traced his fingers along his pelvis and then took River's rock hard cock into his mouth. "Oh, Skye," he moaned, breathlessly as Skye sucked and licked, taking him deeper, moving his hand down to stroke his balls gently and then even further, down to his hole. River gasped and trembled as Skye traced the outside of his hole while he continued to bob up and down on his cock. He came off for a brief second, just long enough to squirt some lube on his hand, and then went back down on his husband, and River watched as Skye locked gazes with him, and slid a finger into his hole. He shook and gasped, arching his head back and groaning as he felt Skye's tongue in the slit of his cock and then his husband's warm, slick mouth covering him once more as Skye took him deep once again, and then River was thrusting, fucking his husband's mouth while Skye finger fucked him, and God it was glorious.

"Skye…oh, baby, I…you keep that up, I'm gonna…"

"Yeah?" Skye asked, coming off of his cock, but adding a second finger to River's hole. River's thighs trembled and his mouth fell open as he felt Skye's fingers pegging his prostate over and over, sweat beading his skin, his cock throbbing, precum sliding down his shaft.

River brought his hand down to his cock and began to stroke himself as Skye worked yet another finger into his hole and he gasped, shaking even more, his body trembling as his orgasm built. He was hovering on the edge now. So very close to coming.

"That's it, sweetheart," Skye said, smiling. "Touch yourself. God, you're so beautiful." He nudged River's prostate again. "I want you to come for me, baby."

River couldn't hold it back any more. He came. And he came hard. Shouting. His neck and back arching, the veins bulging, his cum shooting out in spurts over his stomach and chest. His body shook as his hole tightened, and then spasmed on Skye's fingers as he trembled. Then he was tugging at Skye's arms and pulling him up, kissing him, and breathing heavily.

He was exhausted but so damn happy. "I…I'm fairly certain, that might be the death of me," he breathed out, and then smiled.

"Not such a bad way to go," Skye said. "God, Riv, you were beautiful. I miss seeing you come."

River smiled and blushed, still in a daze, coming down off the high of his orgasm. "You're sweet," he said.

"You gonna be okay?" Skye asked, using a tissue to wipe the cum off of River's torso. "Or did I wear you out too much?"

"I'll be fine," River said, smiling again. "Give me a minute and I'll repay the favor."

"You sure?"

"Absolutely."

Skye

A few minutes later, Skye was under his husband, his cock in River's mouth, and Skye was moaning, and thrusting, and so very very close to coming, when suddenly River grunted and stopped moving, and his gaze caught Skye's and eyes were filled with pain.

"Riv?" Skye said, in earnest. "What's wrong?"

But River wasn't talking, just slowly, very slowly trying to come off of him, and it looked like he couldn't open his mouth any further, and he was clearly in a lot of pain. Skye winced slightly as River's teeth scraped against his dick.

When he finally did get all the way off he had a hand on his jaw and his eyes were filled with something other than pain. Fear. And he still wasn't talking.

"Riv, what happened?" he asked.

River just shook his head and pointed to his jaw. He looked close to tears.

Oh God.

Skye scrambled out of the bed and grabbed a sock from the dresser drawer and ran into the kitchen. He filled it with rice and tied it at the top and then threw it in the microwave for a minute and brought it back to River and handed it to him. "Try this," he said. "It should help relax your jaw."

River

River took the makeshift heating pad and rested it against his jaw, closing his eyes, trying to breathe. He was trying not to freak out. It hurt so bad. He'd never had his jaw lock on him before. And of all times for it to happen, it just had to be while he was giving his husband a blow job.

Goddamnit. He felt like he couldn't do anything right. And the tears started falling once again, which just made his jaw hurt more.

"Riv," Skye said next to him. "It's gonna be okay." He rested a hand on River's shoulder but River jerked away, his tears coming harder now.

Skye sighed. "Should I leave you alone?" he asked.

River didn't know what he wanted. He didn't want Skye's pity. He just wanted to be a fucking husband and give the man he loved pleasure and he couldn't fucking do that because his fucking body wouldn't fucking work! And he was so fucking angry and done with all of it, but there was nothing he could do. What he wanted was to be better, to be whole. But Skye couldn't give him that. So what was he supposed to do?

He nodded.

Skye got dressed and left.

And River cried.

When Skye came back to the bedroom half an hour later and climbed into bed, River was still awake.

"Hey," Skye said softly. "Your jaw doing better?"

"Yeah," River replied, facing away from his husband. He was depressed and angry and didn't know what to do with his emotions. All the good memories from the sex they'd had earlier were mired by the fact that he felt like he'd let Skye down. He still hadn't been able to give his husband an orgasm. Skye had probably rubbed one out in the living room while River had been in the bedroom feeling sorry for himself.

"Do you want to talk about it?"

River shook his head.

"K," Skye said. And River could tell he was disappointed. "I love you," he said. "Goodnight, Riv."

A few minutes later he heard Skye snoring, and he closed his eyes as more tears slid down his cheeks.