3. Skye

"Good grief." Jenna rolled her eyes at Skye from where she was sitting next to Nick on the other side of the table. They were at Jake's and River and Anna had just gone up to the bar to get the group some more drinks. Anna had her hand on the small of River's back and he leaned over and whispered something in her ear, making her laugh. He looked genuinely happy.

Skye wanted to punch something.

"You're hopeless." Jenna took a sip of her soda and Skye glared at her.

Nick laughed. He was a big guy, six foot three, and all muscle, with short dark hair and hazel eyes. Very handsome. Despite his intimidating appearance though, he was a total teddy bear, reserved and quiet, like River, even more so, really, and wouldn't hurt a fly.

Jenna, on the other hand, was about as sassy and feisty as they came, and super outgoing. The four of them had met in college at one of the events for the Gay-Straight Alliance. Jenna was bi, Nick was straight. Skye loved them both to death but they drove him insane.

"Just what is that supposed to mean?" he said. They both laughed and Skye glared harder.

"You have been staring at him all night," Jenna said, leaning over the table and talking in a hushed voice, her cleavage showing under the v of her blouse. Heat radiated up Skye's neck and across his face.

"I have not." He totally had. And he was thinking that asking River and Anna to join them had been an incredibly stupid idea, because the more he had to watch them flirt and touch and be all…them, the more tense he got and the more his stomach knotted. What the fuck was that about? Since when had he been so fixated on River? And why couldn't he let him and Anna be without getting so…so…

"Jealous," Jenna said, and Skye flinched. Had he said that out loud?

"What?"

"You're jealous. Admit it."

"I am not. Why would I be jealous? It's River. He's my best friend."

Jenna exchanged a glance with Nick. Her dark hair was cut short and her green eyes sparkled. She had large hoop earrings in her ears that swayed when she turned her head. Or really, if she moved at all. Skye was pretty sure they were as big as her face. He was also pretty sure she was trying not to laugh again.

"You're totally jealous, bro," Nick said. "Just tell him how you feel and get it over with. Watching you is painful."

"There is nothing to tell," Skye hissed, as River and Anna made their way back to the table.

There wasn't. He swore to God there wasn't. River was his friend. That was all.

"Okay guys, time's up, pass your papers forward," Skye said on Monday morning, as he stood in front of the students' desks and motioned with his hands.

There were a few groans and some last minute scribbles before the papers started coming forward, and he collected them.

"Are we going to have a pop quiz every week?" Amanda, a girl with short dark hair asked in dismay.

"If I tell you that it kind of defeats the purpose, don't you think?" Skye grinned at her but she just rolled her eyes.

Another girl raised her hand. She had short blonde hair, freckles and braces, and was one of the most hard working students in the class.

"Yes, Gwen?" he asked.

"Did you grade our papers yet?"

"I did. You'll get them back at the end of the period. Which reminds me, there are some of you who need to remember to write your names on your homework. I'm gonna start deducting points for it if it keeps being a problem. It takes me long enough to grade them without having to go through them all and figure out who they belong to. Got it?"

There were some nods and a few groans.

"Okay, open your books—" Skye was cut off by his phone buzzing in his pants pocket.

"Mr. Mckenzie, your ass is calling," Gwen said with a chuckle, and the students laughed as he reached for it and silenced it without bothering to check who it was. He didn't get calls during the day unless they were spam, because everyone knew he was at work. And if it was an emergency they would call back or call the front office.

Only seconds later his phone was buzzing again.

"Maybe you should answer it," another student, Kevin, said from the back row.

Skye held up a finger and checked the caller ID. When he saw that it was the same unknown number both times he started to worry.

"I'm gonna step into the hall for a second," he said. "You guys behave."

When he got out to the hall he swiped the phone to answer it, his heart racing as he put it to his ear. "Hello?" His voice was not nearly as sturdy as he was trying to make it.

"Hello, is this Skyelar Mckenzie?" the female asked, and his heart rate picked up even more.

"Yes," he managed. "Who's this?"

"I'm calling from South Memorial Hospital. We have a River Dawson here and you are his emergency contact."

"Oh, God." His stomach roiled and his chest squeezed painfully. "What happened? Is he okay?" His hands were shaking and he felt like his knees were about to give out on him.

"I'm afraid there's been an accident. He's stable, and conscious. Are you able to come?" Skye's breath left him in a relieved puff of air and he ran his fingers through his hair. Fuck. Breathe, he told himself. Breathe. He's okay. He has to be okay.

"Yes, yes, of course," he said, trying to stop shaking. God, he didn't think he'd ever been more scared in his life.

"Good. Just ask for him when you get there."

"Okay." He hung up the phone and called the front office to explain the situation and see if someone could watch his classes for the rest of the day, and then he went back into his room with his best ‘everything's fine' face on for his students and told them he would be taking the rest of the day off for personal reasons.

"Is everything okay?" Gwen asked, and he heard the genuine concern in her voice.

"It will be," he said, giving her a small smile. "I have a friend who was in an accident and I need to go see him. But yes, he's okay."

He saw lots of concerned looks on their faces but didn"t take the time to explain anything more. Another staff member showed up shortly and Skye grabbed his jacket, keys and messenger bag, and headed out the door.

His hands were shaking as he drove to the hospital, and his heart pounded. God, River, please be okay, he pleaded.

Skye was relieved to find that River was sitting up in his bed, reclined, sipping on water when he arrived. There were no doctors or nurses in the room at the time. He looked peaked, and a little shaken, a bandage on the side of his head and some mild cuts and bruises, but he seemed okay. Skye, however, was a different story. When he thought he might have lost River in the brief second on the phone before the nurse told him he was conscious, Skye couldn't breathe. He honestly didn't know what he would do if something happened to his best friend.

Seeing him now, Skye just wanted to rush over and take River in his arms, but he didn"t. He knocked on the open door and River's head shot up, his Adam"s apple bobbing as he swallowed his water. He pushed his glasses up on his nose with one finger. Skye was kind of surprised the glasses had made it through the accident unscathed.

"Skye," River said, his voice filled with surprise. "What are you doing here?"

Skye's eyebrows furrowed. "Are you fucking kidding me?" He walked over and set his things down on one of the chairs in the room. "You're in the hospital. They called me. They said you had an accident."

"Yeah, but I'm okay. You didn't have to come. You should be at work." He slowly reached over to set the cup of water on the tray next to his hospital bed, wincing as his face screwed up, and he rested a hand on his left side.

"Yeah, aces, I can tell," Skye said. "How are you really? And don't shit with me."

River sighed. "I'm pretty sure I have some broken ribs. Or at least cracked. It hurts just to breathe. And bending or twisting is even worse. I have the mother of all headaches and my ankle is throbbing."

"That's all?" Skye said. "Jesus, you don't even need to be here." River smirked at him.

"What happened? That phone call scared the hell out of me." For a brief moment he'd even wondered if River had tried to hurt himself, but looking at him now he was certain that wasn't the case. The woman on the phone had just said "accident", though. That could have meant anything, and River had been down lately. In all the time Skye had known River, his friend had never tried to hurt himself, so he knew it was unlikely, but still, not impossible, given his history. The thought had shaken him and he was still trying to calm his racing heart, and his nerves. River was here. He was safe.

River's eyes met his. "I'm fine." Skye's face must have been radiating concern because River reached over and squeezed his arm. "It was scary, but it could have been a lot worse. Someone tried to change lanes and didn't see me, so I got hit and ran into someone else, and we both swerved off the side of the road. I was unconscious when they found me, which was pretty scary because I don't remember hitting my head or anything, but they got me to wake up pretty quickly. I think my car looks worse than I do."

Fuck, that's scary. Skye could have lost him. River…he… fuck. Skye managed a small smile. He didn't want to panic and freak his friend out. He was okay. He was fine. A few cracked ribs was nothing compared to what it could have been. Jesus, why wouldn't his heart stop racing? "You sure you're okay?" he managed to ask, giving himself credit for how not freaked out he sounded. "I would be pretty shaken after something like that."

"I am shaken," River admitted. "Not sure I want to be behind the wheel of a car again any time soon."

"Have they done imaging and all that yet? Did they check for a concussion?"

"Yeah, I'm waiting on the results. I wouldn't be surprised if I have a concussion, and I'm pretty sure I have a broken ankle, too, with how much it's hurting."

"Right, I'll shut up. Just rest. But I'm staying until I talk to a doctor and find out what's going on with you and how long you'll be here," Skye insisted.

River nodded, lowering his head to the pillow and closing his eyes.

Skye sat in the remaining chair and pulled out the pop quizzes to grade, realizing as he did, that he never did give his students their papers back as he'd promised. Oh well. This was more important. River was always more important than anything else in his life, it seemed.

This gorgeous man with his sapphire eyes that make even the deepest blues of the ocean pale in comparison. Those thick, full lips, the light dusting of stubble along his face that hadn't been there when they met all those years ago, but made him even more handsome now, Skye thought. His long, dark eyelashes that fell just above his cheekbones now that his eyes were closed. The dark, almost raven hair. God, he was beautiful. River Dawson was the most breathtakingly beautiful man in the world, inside and out.

As Skye watched him, asleep in the hospital bed, River's chest rising and falling with every beautiful, perfect breath, he couldn't deny it any longer. Jenna and Nick were right. He was more than just attracted to River. He was falling in love with River. The realization hit him so hard it knocked the breath from his lungs. His chest ached and tears stung his eyes.

With every fiber of his being, he was falling in love with his best friend. With his compassion and kindness, with his humor, his gentleness and his strength, with his courage and resilience. He was falling in love with River's beautiful smile and his infectious laughter. If he had the balls to admit it to himself, he'd been falling in love with River for years, but trying so very hard not to, for two very good reasons.

First of all, River was religious. He believed in all that God and Jesus and praying stuff, doing Bible studies and going to church on Sunday mornings, and Skye didn't. He loved and respected River for his faith, and the fact that he was a Christian who loved God but also loved the LGBTQ community made Skye respect him even more, even if he didn't agree with his beliefs. He knew River accepted him for who he was and he had never asked Skye to change, but having a best friend who didn't share your faith was one thing. Having that person be your life partner was different, right? Surely someone who shared River's faith would be a better fit for him. And neither of them should have to compromise who they were for the sake of a relationship. If River ever developed feelings for Skye, could they make it work without giving up a part of themselves? He wanted to believe they could. But did it matter? Because the second reason, and the most blatantly obvious one, was the fact the River was straight.

But regardless of both of those things, Skye felt his resolve crumbling. That giant wall of ice he'd built in his head to protect himself from falling for River wasn't as strong as it had been ten years ago, or five years ago, or three. It was melting now, and he didn't know what to do to stop it.

I'm not falling in love with him.I'm not. I'm not. I…I can't.

Falling in love with River would only lead to heartache.

Skye was awoken by a knock on the door. He didn't even remember falling asleep, but the sound startled him and he jumped as a very undignified snort left him, all of his papers falling from his lap and onto the floor. He grabbed his neck, which was sore from sleeping in the chair, and groaned.

River was slower to regain consciousness, his eyes fluttering open. He looked a little dazed and pretty exhausted still. Looking at the clock on the wall, Skye realized it'd been a couple of hours since he arrived.

"Hi, I'm Dr. Rosemary," a woman in a white coat said, reaching her hand out to Skye.

"Skye," he told her, shaking her hand, then proceeded to pick up the scattered papers.

"How are you feeling, Mr. Dawson?" Dr. Rosemary asked, turning to River, clipboard in hand.

"I've been better," River replied, groggily.

"Yeah, that's not surprising," Dr. Rosemary said. "Are you okay with Skye staying while I discuss your results?" River nodded and she continued.

"You have three cracked ribs, and a mild concussion, and your ankle is broken. Nothing too severe, so no surgery required, but still, lots of rest in your future. What do you do for work?"

"I'm a physical therapist," River said.

Dr. Rosemary grinned at him. "Well then, I guess I don't really need to tell you what to do to take care of yourself. But I will. Ice, rest, more ice, and more rest. Okay? We'll send you home with some breathing exercises to do for your ribs, every couple of hours. If it's painful you can put a pillow against your ribs to help. But it's important that you do them to reduce the risk of pneumonia or other complications. Don't push yourself. Start working on your ankle once it's ready, and not before. In the meantime we'll put it in a cast and give you some crutches to get around on for a while. Using the crutches with cracked ribs will be uncomfortable at best, so only move around if you need to. Do you have stairs in your house?"

"No, thankfully," River said.

"I can prescribe you some pain relievers," Dr. Rosemary said. "And of course, no driving until your ankle and ribs are better. I assume you"re in good hands at home." She nodded at Skye.

"Oh, yeah, he'll be fine," Skye promised with a small smile. "How long before he can get back to work?"

"We'll be monitoring the ankle injury every few weeks or so to make sure it's healing properly, but the process itself could take up to 6 weeks before he's able to put any kind of weight back on it. In the meantime he can use crutches if he needs to, but it's best to keep the ankle elevated and be icing it as much as possible. Once he's able to put weight on it again he can move from crutches to a boot. It could take several months before he's fully functional again and he'll have to keep up with his PT at home, but he'll get there. I would recommend taking as much time off as possible to rest and heal. Talk to your employer and human resources where you work and see what their policies are and how much they are willing to work with you. But in your line of work and with the injuries you've sustained, I'd say four weeks minimum off work to recover. And of course I'll give you a note." She looked to River again and he nodded solemnly.

Skye knew this wouldn't be easy for River, being practically bed bound for weeks, not being able to work or go places with friends. Not being able to go to church or his weekly Bible study. Why did it seem like every shitty thing in the world happened to his best friend? And yet he had to remind himself that it could be worse. River could be dead right now, instead of sitting in the hospital bed next to him, looking forlorn.

"There was one other thing we saw on the x-rays we took," Dr. Rosemary continued. "We don't know if this is from the accident or from an earlier injury. Have you had any falls recently, Mr. Dawson?"

"Um, no, not recently," River said, the surprise evident in his voice. He pushed his glasses up his nose again even though they hadn"t moved. He shifted slightly in his bed and then winced, grabbing his injured side. "I had a fall in college, about seven years ago," he grunted out.

"Can you expand on that?"

"It was winter, and I was walking down some icy steps. I slipped and landed pretty hard on my butt. It hurt like crap at the time for a solid thirty minutes or so and kinda knocked the wind out of me. I was sore for a while but I just kinda walked it off, and after that I was fine," River explained.

"Well, if it's not bothering you then it's really not a problem, but your tailbone is dislocated," the doctor said. She showed them the image. Sure enough, River's tailbone was deviated to the left a bit. "It's possible the accident just exacerbated the issue and it wasn't this bad before. Do you have any pain when you sit, either in the low back or coccyx, or any pain during intercourse?"

River flinched and flushed bright red. And when the doctor's eyes shifted to Skye and then back to River, Skye felt his cheeks heating, too.

"No!" Skye said at the same time as his roommate.

"No, he's not, I mean, we're not," River stammered, gesturing between them. He winced again, his face looking drawn and pale.

"We're not together," Skye said more calmly. "Just roommates."

"Oh, I'm so sorry." Dr. Rosemary blushed herself. "My mistake. Well, if it does become painful for whatever reason we've given you the information for an orthopedist with your discharge papers. We'll get those here soon and you should be ready to leave within the next couple of hours. Take care of yourself." She smiled at them and left.

"That was awkward," River said, his face flushed yet again. He didn't make eye contact with Skye as he bit his lip.

"Whatever," Skye shrugged, and River glanced at him. "She thought we were together. It's not a big deal. I didn't know you had that fall back in college, by the way. You never told me that."

River rested back against his pillows again. He spoke softly. "Didn't really seem important. Besides, what was I supposed to say? ‘Hey, Skye, guess what, I fell on my ass today on my way to class. Everyone saw me. It was super embarrassing and my bum hurt like hell the whole way there. By the way, how"s your Philosophy class going?'"

Skye couldn't hold back his chuckle. "Smart ass." River gave him a small smile and his chest constricted. That smile made him weak in the knees and he didn't see it nearly enough.

"I texted everyone while you were asleep," Skye told his friend. "Nick and Jenna said there are easier ways to get out of our weekly game nights."

That made River laugh, but Skye immediately regretted it when his friend winced in pain. Shit.

"Sorry," he grimaced. "They also said to let them know if we need anything. I couldn't text Anna ‘cause I don't have her number, so you probably want to do that."

River nodded and Skye handed him his phone. It took him longer than normal to send the text but he finally did and put his phone aside again, already looking peaked.

"Your Aunt Jodi offered to come too, but I told her she didn't need to make the drive until we knew what was happening."

There was a moment of silence before Skye spoke again. He looked down and fiddled with the pen in his hands. "Did it bother you?" he asked. He felt River's gaze on him and looked up.

"Did what bother me?" River's blue eyes were soft, searching his, those full lips puckered ever so slightly, just begging to be kissed. Stop it. Skye glanced down. Ice wall. Ice wall. Very, very thick ice wall. With a couple of dinosaurs in front of it and a tank and some sumo wrestlers, too.

He knew better than this. He knew better than to ask this question. Why was he stepping down this road? He knew it was dangerous. Still, he found himself saying, "Her, assuming we were together. Did it bother you?" he felt his throat closing tightly. The room suddenly got ten degrees colder. His heart rate spiked as he waited for what seemed like an eternity for River to answer.

"I don't know," River said, honestly, unable to meet Skye's gaze as if he were ashamed. "I don't know," he repeated. "I don't know what was going through my mind when I said ‘no' to her question about intercourse. I don't know if it was because it was directed to you and me and I found it disturbing because we're friends and not lovers, or if I was just afraid of what you would think when she said that because I wanted to make it clear on your behalf we weren't together, because I didn't want to make you feel uncomfortable." He looked Skye in the eyes now. "Honestly, I think that just the mention of me having sex with another man is hard for me, after what happened to me in high school, and maybe that's what I reacted to most of all. Not you. Or us."

Jerk. Skye was a big fat jerk. Here he was, trying to size up their relationship, putting River under a spotlight, after he'd just been in an accident that had left him immobile for the next six weeks, and then he gets bombarded with memories of his past. Skye was such a jerk.

"River, I'm so sorry," he said. "That makes perfect sense, and I shouldn't have asked you that. It doesn't matter."

River tilted his head to the side in a way that Skye found so very endearing. "Of course it does." His voice was so sincere. "If I claim to love and advocate for the queer community I shouldn't be ashamed or disgusted to be counted as a part of it, whether on purpose or by accident. I don't blame you for asking."

Skye gave him a sideways grin. But he almost wished River hadn't said that, because now, one of the sumo wrestlers Skye had put in front of the ice wall was gone.