28. Ella

CHAPTER TWENTY-EIGHT

ELLA

" S tudio two-bedroom. Fitness center, pool, washer dryer. Thirty-five hundred." I cringe. "That's a little rich for my blood." Scrolling through a few rental properties in the Anaheim area has been eye opening. I have no idea how much August pays for this place but it has to be upwards of ten to twelve thousand per month given where we are and the amenities included. By all means this isn't what I wanted to be doing today but I have yet to hear from August and something in my gut is telling me if he hasn't been in touch yet, there probably isn't much hope that he'll come around.

This entire day so far has been spent cuddled in my bed covered in fluffy blankets. I've only left my room to go to the kitchen for a drink and a snack and then it's right back to bed. I've taken two naps in between calls with Paige. After chatting with her, I decided maybe I do need to at least look around for a new place to live. So here I am scrolling through my iPad and noting any rentals that seem clean, inexpensive, and are in a safe part of town.

"One bedroom townhouse…no, that's not a great area."

Scroll on.

"Three beds, three baths with a balcony. Ugh, not for sixty-eight hundred a month. Do I even make sixty-eight hundred per month?"

Scroll on.

"One bedroom, two floors with pool and balcony for two thousand." I cock my head reading all the rental details and then click the option to save the listing as a favorite. "Maybe? I don't know."

Scroll on.

"One bedroom with walk-in closets…"

I hear the front door open and wonder if it could actually be August.

Do I say hello?

Do I just walk out there?

Should I stay here in my room?

What if it's August and he doesn't want to see me?

Do I want to see him though?

Am I ready for him to be home?

What will he say to me?

Will he be mad that I'm still here?

Will he be expecting me not to be here?

Does he expect me to move out as soon as today?

Maybe not bothering him is best.

He did say he didn't want to look at me ever again

I go back to scrolling through rentals, reminding myself that I do have a few possibilities saved so that if August yells at me to move out I can at least tell him I'm looking. I click on the next listing for a studio apartment with an open floor plan as there's movement outside my bedroom door.

My heart races and my mouth goes dry as the doorknob turns and the door opens just a bit. Nobody speaks and I can't take it anymore so I nervously say, "Hello?"

August doesn't push the door open, nor does he walk through the doorway. But what does come through makes me gasp, smile, and want to jump from my bed. First it's a little green ball with a bell inside that rings as the ball rolls across my floor. That ball is quickly followed by an eagerly playful orange and white kitten who pounces on the ball projecting it farther across the floor.

"Oh, my God! Look at you!" I squeal quietly to the tiny kitten who runs after the ball with reckless abandon. I climb slowly from the bed, watching its every move even though my heart is pounding, so I don't scare the poor thing. Then I crouch down and pick up my new four-legged furry friend, snuggling him in my arms and petting his tiny little body.

"Aren't you the cutest little thing I've ever seen? And just where did you come from?" I ask, knowing this little thing isn't going to answer me back.

My door opens a little more though, and August stands there on the other side with a few cat toys and a small blanket in his hand.

"Hey," he says.

"Hey."

He swallows hard and then adds, "I'm uh…I'm really bad at apologies so I thought maybe this little guy could help me. They were just giving them away at the humane society."

"Giving them away, huh?"

August bobs his head. "Well, turns out when you make a sizeable donation and promise to volunteer in the near future, they're willing to help you find what you're looking for."

"Mmm." Nuzzling the new fuzzy kitten between my chin and my chest, I walk him back to my bed and set him down. He proceeds to jump around my duvet and then nestles in my lap.

"Can I come in?" August asks, still standing in the doorway.

"It's your apartment, Auggieeeest…August." Fuck. I forgot he doesn't want me to call him Auggie anymore.

"It's your apartment too, you know," he says quietly as he steps inside and over to my bed.

Is it?

When I don't answer, his glance falls to my iPad and the listing I have on the screen. "Ella?"

"Yeah."

He hesitates to answer, so I pull my eyes from the kitten long enough to glance his way and when I do, my heart drops and there's an ache in my throat at the sight of him. His eyes are wide, his chin is trembling, and he bites his bottom lip trying to hold back tears but they slip down his cheek anyway.

"Please don't leave me."

For once I don't know what to say.

I want to tell him everything is going to be okay, but I can't even answer that for myself, so I simply hold out my hand to him in hopes he'll accept the small gesture of comfort.

"How can I help you, August?"

He takes my hand and winds our fingers together before sitting on the edge of the bed next to me. "You can help me by saying you won't leave."

"Are you sure you want me to stay? Because last night you?—"

"Please don't say it," he begs, grimacing at the thought. "I know what I said. My own fucking voice has been playing on repeat in my head all day and it's the worst hell you could imagine."

"I can definitely imagine," I tell him honestly.

"Ella." He shakes his head but keeps eye contact with me as tears stream down his face. "I'm so sorry. I was a dick. I don't have a valid excuse for my actions or my words, especially my words to you. I feel like I was having some sort of out of body experience and I'm so, so, so, fucking sorry I hurt you."

I break his eye contact momentarily to check on our kitten friend who made himself comfortable right up against my other pillow and fell fast asleep. Then I squeeze August's hand and say, "I'm sorry too August."

His brows furrow and he shakes his head. "For what? You have nothing to be sorry for."

"Yes I do," I tell him. "You were right. I should have told you. I should have told you about Furbling all those years ago when it happened." I shake my head this time. "I had forgotten all about it until you said something last night, but I need you to know, to really know, that what you think happened, didn't happen."

He nods. "I know. Scarlett and Oliver got to me. I should have listened to you, Ella. I should have believed you."

"Yeah." I nod quietly. "That did sting a little."

"It was all so fucking much, El. The minute I saw that picture of you I wanted to vomit everywhere. I was so angry at him. Angry for you but then he made me second guess everything. It was too much, and I just…"

"Snapped."

He dips his head slightly and he lets out a sigh. "Yeah."

Lowering my head to meet his gaze, I murmur to him, "Well I feel pretty certain Jeff Furbling won't be seen or heard from for quite some time if that makes you feel any better."

"I don't give a shit about any of it," he says to me. "All I care about is you."

My lips part as I suck in a breath, warmth spreading through my body in tiny waves.

"I love you so damn much, Ella. And I don't want to lose you." He lifts our joined hands to his lips and kisses the back of my hand. "Please tell me there's a scenario where we don't end up apart from each other because I don't want to live without you. I need you. All of you. And I want to be the guy who makes you happy."

"What if I'm not enough for you?" My own question brings tears to my eyes and apprehension to my psyche.

"You're all I've ever wanted, Ella. You're all I'll ever want for the rest of my life. I fucked up, I know. I said some hateful things that I can't take back and I know they hurt you and I'm not sure at this point there's anything I can say to erase that hurt except I'm so incredibly and sincerely sorry." More tears trickle from his eyes and it tugs at my heart.

"August…"

"It's Auggie," he tells me. "I've always been Auggie to you."

I reach up to his face with my other hand and palm his cheek, my thumb wiping away a few of his tears. "I love you too, Auggie. I accept your apology…and I love the furry gift. There's nothing we can't get through together. We're a team, okay? You and me."

"You and me." He nods and then pulls me from where I'm sitting on my bed until I'm in his arms, my legs wrapped around his waist and my arms around his neck.

"I love you, Ella."

"I love you too, Auggie."

TWO WEEKS LATER.

It's been two weeks since the night Jeff Furbling showed up at our game and tipped August's world upside down. Since then, he was benched for the last four games, fined several thousands of dollars by the league, and required to do some community service which, as apparently promised, he chose to complete at the Anaheim Humane Society. Consequently, our new kitten friend, who I aptly named Sunflower—Sunny for short because he's a boy—has a new friend. A white kitten with orange ears and a gray tuft on its tail that I let Auggie name Leo. They're quickly becoming best friends and are ornery as ever, but we enjoy every moment having them in our home.

I watch under the brim of my hat as August steps into the room filled with press members following tonight's game. Watching his body move across the floor to his seat does things to my body. My cheeks heat and my chest flutters as his muscles flex in his arms. Phew! We might not make it to the bar tonight without having to spend a few minutes in my dressing room first.

Or his car…

"August, how did you feel about your first game back after your four-game suspension?"

"Uh, I felt good." He nods. "I spent time in the training room and practiced with the team for tonight's game during the last two weeks so hopefully that showed in my performance tonight."

Totally showed, babe. You looked hot out there!

"August," another press member raises his hand. "Can you tell us any more about your past relationship with Jeff Furbling and have you heard from him at all over these past two weeks?"

Fuck off on the Furbling. He's not talking about it.

"No comment," he tells the man before he sits.

That's right, babe. You tell 'em.

I raise my hand while keeping my eyes glued to my notepad so he doesn't know it's me sitting here.

"Yeah. In the blue hat."

I clear my throat before I begin and then say, "Um, Auggie…can I call you Auggie? Seems like a cute name for you, doesn't it?" I raise my head so he can see who I am and then stand from my seat. The other members of the press stare at me with furrowed brows. Clearly they don't recognize me outside my mascot costume.

He smiles back at me. "Uh, yeah sure. I'll allow Auggie." He winks. "But only for you."

"Alright." I beam, pulling off my hat, my long brown hair falling around my shoulders. "I was actually wondering if maybe you might be interested in marrying me."

The crowd chuckles, assuming I'm making some sort of joke. Even August blinks several times and sits back in his chair watching me, a huge smile widening across his face. "I'm sorry, can you repeat that?"

"Of course. Marry me," I say again. "Because I love you and because somehow I was able to sneak into this press conference with all these professionals and nobody pushed me out so this is me, your unmasked team mascot standing in front of all these press members asking you to marry me."

Cocking his head, he narrows his eyes and shakes his head. "Do you know what you're doing Ms. Montgomery?"

I laugh among a now murmuring crowd with microphones pointed at me. "Well, I'm pretty sure I'm just a girl standing in front of a hot hockey player, asking him to marry her. That was the goal anyway. Am I coming across some other way because this feels pretty cut and dry here."

In the back of the room, the rest of the team comes barging in and somehow I know they just got word that I was in here proposing to August and didn't want to miss out.

Auggie sits up straighter in his chair and clears his throat. "I just wanted you to be sure because I don't want you to ask me to marry you if you're not sure this is what you want. What if I told you I don't want you if I can't have you forever?"

"So that includes for better or worse? Richer or poorer? Sickness and health and all that other stuff?"

"All that other stuff and so much more," he answers with a smirk.

"Sold," I tell him. "Let's get hitched."

August shakes his head with a laugh. "I love you Ella Montgomery. I'll marry you any day, anytime, anywhere."

"I love you too, August Blackstone. How does Vegas sound?"

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