Chapter 28

CHAPTER 28

“Glenda Mark’s golden retriever, Sadie, just had another litter of puppies. Cute as buttons!”

“School board meetin’ got canceled.”

“I found another long black hair growing out under my chin this morning. I swear them damn things just erupt overnight, ’cause I didn’t see it yesterday.”

The salon resumed its daily offerings as if nothing had happened. No one mentioned Kimmie and her outburst, or me, or anything. I was greeted at the door with the usual chorus of “Heys” I’d come to expect. I thought for sure that I’d be treated with disdain and cold glares as Donna had been, but none of that happened. I didn’t know what the difference was between us other than I had left that life while she was still in it.

Tambre came from the break room with a cup of coffee in her hand. “I’m so glad you came in today. Bex called in with a sick kid and has to stay home. I’ve called her clients to reschedule, but if you can help with some of them, that would be great. There’s an event at the high school tonight, and it seems everyone else in the county wants a fresh color job and decided to book an appointment this week.”

“You bet.” I walked to my station to set up for the day. I already had a full schedule of color touch-ups and several high school girls, including Hilda. Her grandmother had grumbled about it but allowed her to have her hair done professionally now. I’d worked a deal with Hilda to keep Pearl a few times in trade so she could keep her money. She would come here later today for her appointment. I’d asked her about the Melford boy when she called for a time, and I could hear the happy sigh through the phone line. Apparently, they were together now, and it was a good match.

It was midmorning when the second shoe dropped. The bell announced that someone had just entered the salon, and the room hushed quickly. I turned to see Robert in the waiting room. He was watching me with a deep frown on his normally serene face.

I had to face him sometime, and I was between clients, so now was as good a time as any. There was no reason for me to look anywhere else in the salon, as I was sure every eye was glued on the both of us.

“Can we speak outside for a minute?” His tone was tight and dry, coming from thinned lips.

He turned, and I followed him to the parking lot. If his aim was privacy, I doubted that would happen. The front windows were big and wide with no curtains. I had the absurd thought that they resembled a TV screen at the moment. All the salon ladies needed was some microwave popcorn, and they were set.

“Something funny?” he asked.

“Not really,” I answered on a sigh. “I can already guess why you’re here. It’s about yesterday.”

He nodded. “Is what that woman said true?”

I thought about Kimmie and our shared past.

I thought about Betsey and her long hug of welcome last night at the Lair.

I thought about Mute, one of the scariest men I’d ever seen, and the reverent look of love on his face as he held his newborn.

I thought about Tambre and the calm support she always gave me.

I thought about Bryce, my confession to him, and how even after I’d bared myself and every dirty secret I had, he didn’t walk away.

I thought about the incredible night I spent with a man who, even though he hadn’t said it yet, loved me and my daughter. He was committed to me and I to him in a way few souls ever found.

These were my people now. My family. I was good with that.

“Yes, it’s true. I was a club whore and a drug addict. I’ve left that life and been clean for almost three years, and I plan to stay that way.”

He flinched, his mouth thinning even more, and it wasn’t hard to see that his entire demeanor toward me had changed. It seemed the only words he paid attention to were “whore” and “addict.” If he heard “clean” and “stay that way,” he didn’t catch them very well.

He took off his glasses and cleaned them much like he had when he saw Kimmie at the Halloween festival. “I’m not sure I can be with you anymore. It bothers me to think you’ve had… sex… with other men.”

His words sent a shock through me, and it was on the tip of my tongue to remind him that’s how babies were made. “I’m not proud of my past, but I won’t let it dictate my future.”

He put the frames back on his nose and pushed them up. “That’s very admirable of you, but that doesn’t change what you’ve done. How many?”

“What?”

“How many men have you… slept with?”

“I don’t know.”

He glanced at a point above my head. “You don’t know. Must be a lot.”

At one time, his interrogation would humiliate me. Right now, it made me angry.

And I liked it.

My spine clicked into place as I stood tall and raised my chin. “What do you want me to say, Robert? I can’t change what I’ve done, but I can change what I do now. If it’s something that bugs you that much, honestly, I don’t think I want to be with you either. I don’t want to be around someone who constantly judges me for circumstances I had no control over. I was a kid who had no one but myself to rely on, and I did the best I could. Yes, I made some bad choices, but I’ve also learned from them.”

He fiddled with his glasses again. Did this habit of his irritate me because of his attitude toward me now? “I’m happy you’ve given up that life and moved on to something more.”

His tone didn’t match his words. It was easy to see that he would forever look down on me in spite of how far I’d come or what I did from now on. It didn’t matter how hard I worked or how successful I might be, he would always regard me as a woman who was beneath him.

“You preach about love, forgiveness, acceptance, understanding, compassion, and other stuff like that. I guess it’s easier to talk about it than to live it. I am sorry that you’re bothered by me now, but if what you say is true and God loves everyone, that includes us sinners as well.”

He sniffed and awkwardly changed his stance. “You’re right. God does love everyone, and I preach about a lot. I don’t want to fall into that judgmental trap ’cause it’s the opposite of what I’m supposed to think and feel, but there’s a part of me that can’t help it. I like you, Opal. I like you a lot, but now, when I want to kiss you, I can’t help but think about how many other men have done that and more. I’m angry at myself for feeling this way, and that’s something I have to face and figure out.”

My anger dissipated some at his confession. “I think you’re just being human.”

His green eyes were wet when they rose to meet mine. “I’m sorry, and I hope you’ll forgive me.”

“Don’t beat yourself up, Robert. I can forgive you and move on, but I think you should find someone else to cut your hair.”

I turned and walked back into the salon, growing lighter and lighter with each step.

Tambre met me at the door. “You okay?”

I smiled. “Yes. Yes, I am.”