Chapter 27

CHAPTER 27

I guess it’s true what they say about living in a small town. A person sneezes on one side and someone across the way says, “Bless you.”

We collected Pearl from Lori and headed up to the Lair. It was dinnertime when we got there. Smells of comfort cooking filled the air.

Betsey met us at the door. No questions. No disapproving stares. No condemnations. She just opened her arms and took me in, and for once, she only had four words to say.

“You’re gonna be okay.”

This was a statement made as if it was a factual law.

That was it. That was all it took. I clutched at her shoulders and let loose like I was dying. I’d seen a mother’s love in Mama J and the DRMC old ladies, but I’d never had it for myself. Betsey might be the grandma to the world, but right now, she was the maternal figure I needed. One I hadn’t realized how much I’d missed until now. “I don’t know how to thank you for… all of this.”

“Pshhhht, this is part of being a family. We hold each other up, and if one of us falls, we’re the net that will catch you. I want you to stay here tonight, and you’re welcome to stay longer if you want. I always got room. Period. Now, let me feed that baby of yours, and you take a little ‘me’ time. Deal with life when you’re ready.”

I wasn’t hungry, but the tangy scent of pork barbecue enticed me to eat a little. Betsey cooed and played with Pearl as my child smeared mashed potatoes all over her face rather than use the curved toddler spoon clutched in her hand. Bryce stayed by my side at all times, as if shielding me. My shelter in the storm.

“Mute and Dodge went over to check your place. Kimmie cleared out already, and we don’t know where she went. They can’t tell if she took any of your stuff, but she did turn all the faucets on full blast and propped the refrigerator and freezer doors open. They took care of it, so you don’t have to worry. If anything is missing, we’ll replace it.”

I wasn’t surprised at Kimmie’s pettiness. It bothered me, as I’d been paying all the rent and utilities for the past couple of months, and that act was nothing more than spiteful vengeance, but she was so far into herself that she probably didn’t recognize how far she’d fallen. I hoped wherever she went, she would find her way back.

This was a typical night at the Lair. Some members came in for a quick visit before heading home. A few of the single members played a game of pool while the giant TV showed a football sports show. The deer head above the fireplace wore a Carolina Panthers ball cap, showing where the Dragon Runners’ allegiance lined up.

Betsey walked around in her heeled boots with Pearl firmly on her hip. When my girl squirmed to get down, Betsey let her do that and kept an eye on her steps.

No one asked me about the details of today’s event. No one pointed at me and whispered behind cupped hands. No one bothered me at all. It was refreshing to just be in the moment and not have any obligations or responsibilities.

But time doesn’t stand still for anyone. Night had already fallen, and Pearl started her demands to be held. She toddled first to me to pick her up, then reached for Bryce. He lifted her and let her settle on his shoulder as we sat on the sofa side by side.

“I called Mom, and Emma is going to stay with her tonight. I don’t want to leave you alone right now.”

Does that mean he wants us to sleep together or just be under the same roof? I was acutely aware that we hadn’t gotten physical as in sex. Yeah, we’d made out like a couple of teenagers, but nothing else. Bryce had never pushed that boundary. Did he want to touch me now, or did hearing about my past make him cringe away from that intimacy? “I’m… um… sure I’ll be fine.”

“I know you will be. I’m still staying.” He leaned over and kissed my temple. “What’s on your mind?”

“Where…?” I started. “I’m not sure where I’m supposed to be.”

“Betsey has a full guest suite upstairs if you want to use it, but if you’re okay with it, I’d much rather you stay with me. My room isn’t the biggest one here, but it’s private.”

“What about Pearl?”

He glanced down at my little girl, whose eyes were drifting closed, but it was Betsey who answered. She walked up to us and deftly transferred Pearl into her arms. “Now, don’t you worry ’bout this baby. I got everythin’ she’s gonna need upstairs with me. You okay leavin’ her with me for the night? I promise I’ll come get you if she won’t settle, but I think she’s on her way to a good sleep. I think Mama needs one too. You come on upstairs if you want, and you can bring your man with you or not. You need some time alone? I’ll run his ass off and give you that. If you feel better ’bout stayin’ with him in his room? You do whatever it is that makes you comfortable. Ain’t no one here gonna say nothin’.”

More tears built up behind my eyes. “Why are you so good to me? I’m nobody.”

Betsey’s voice became tight. “That’s where you’re wrong, darlin’. I heard what you did for Hilda Burns. You might have changed that girl’s life, and that right there is something special.”

“It was just a haircut.”

“To you, it was just a haircut. To Hilda, it was an openin’ to a whole new world.”

I pondered this. I’d seen Hilda since her winter dance transformation. In fact, I’d gotten more teenage clients coming in and asking for my services. The thought had never occurred to me about what influence I had on these young girls. I had firsthand experience of how a kind word of encouragement, plus a little makeup and hair color, could boost someone’s outlook on life. Betsey loved her bright red hair and heels and wore them with pride. Molly loved her colorful nails. Tambre had her thriving salon. Katrina, Eva, Psalm, Lori, Fauna—all of them had their talents.

Me? I helped all of them look and feel pretty.

“I think I’ll stay with Bryce, if you’re sure you can handle Pearl?”

Betsey smiled warmly. “Darlin’, I’ve been a mama and a gramma to a lot of kids. That’s my gift. Now, you go get yourself some sleep. Tomorrow is early enough to handle anything else.”

Bryce guided me down a hall that led to his room. It was pretty far in the back of this rabbit warren, and he didn’t lie when he said it was small. The double bed was only full-size, not queen, and took up most of the space. A small beat-up dresser and nightstand took the rest. It had its own bathroom, but only a shower stall big enough for one, a pedestal sink, and toilet. The room was very basic, but it was clean and neat. I’d stayed in worse places.

What made it great was the man standing behind me. He put his arms around my shoulders and pulled me back into his body. It must be one of his favorite ways to hug, as I’d been in this same position before. I remembered the picture Betsey showed me of him hugging his mom from behind.

This is one way he shows people he loves them.

Where that random thought came from, I had no clue, but it made sense. We made sense.

My belly quivered and my heart sped up as I took a breath, and my voice trembled a little as I spoke. “If I asked you to make love to me now, would you do it?”

“Yes.” He pressed his lips against my temple, and I felt the word burn my skin as he said it.

His kiss answered my question, and there was no doubt that after tonight, a single path would lie in front of me. One that I would walk for eternity, and Bryce would be right beside me.

“Are you sure someone like you wants to be with someone like me?” I had to say the words in a whisper.

“Babe, stop thinking so much. If I didn’t want to be here, right now, with you, I wouldn’t.”

“What if?—”

“Stop. We can ‘what if’ all night and still not figure anything out. For the record? Your past does not bother me. It’s your future that I’m interested in, and I plan to be a big part of it. If you’re not ready for this, that’s fine. We’ll wait. But please recognize this fact: I’m here, and I’m not going anywhere.”

I kissed him. Me. I moved first. It was me who made it happen.

I turned in his arms and pulled his head to mine, opening my mouth and taking his. He didn’t pull back or close himself off to me; rather, he let me set the pace. Something inside my chest released, like turning a valve and letting out a pressure I hadn’t known I carried. No more tension, and no more questions. This was where I should be. Where I belonged.

Here with Bryce Turner.

I pulled his cut and the shirt over his head, and he raised his arms to accommodate the action. He resumed kissing me as soon as it was off and didn’t care when I dropped both articles to the floor.

“I should be taking care of you, babe.”

“Please, Bryce, let me do this my way.”

“Okay, sweetheart. You let me know what you need. Got it?”

I reached to undo his jeans, then pushed them down. “Got it.”

He let me touch him and kiss him wherever I wanted. I ran my hands over his chest and traced the swimmer’s muscles with my fingers. His nipples were flat brown circles that I discovered were sensitive. I teased him with my tongue before sucking one in my mouth and heard him groan in response. Reaching lower, I cupped him through his dark gray boxer briefs.

“Fuck, Opal!” he gasped as I stroked his hard length through the cloth. His erection grew as I followed its outline, and a bead of moisture made a spot.

In my past life, I’d have been pushed to my knees by now. Bryce didn’t do anything more than stand in front of me trembling as I caressed and teased him. Now and then, he would take a sharp breath and grit his teeth. It was intoxicating to find that I had a choice and more control than I’d ever had before.

It turned me on. Big-time.

I led him to the bed and pushed him down to lie on his back. There was no headboard, so he placed his hands flat on the wall.

I hadn’t dressed for seduction or pleasure but for work: jeans, a black ribbed Henley shirt, plain beige bra, and panties. I quickly added my clothes to his on the floor. He didn’t move or protest as I mounted him, sliding my core along his thick shaft. It felt good, so I did it again and again.

He writhed under me as if in pain. “Baby, I’m gonna finish before you get started if you keep that up.”

I lifted off him, and he breathed a sigh of relief.

“Were you that close to coming?”

His eyes met mine, but he kept his hands where they were. “Yes, I was. I’ve been wanting this for a long time, and I hope I don’t mess it up.”

“You’re not going to mess up.”

“I will if I come first. I really want to make this good for you, babe.”

“Do you have condoms?” was my throaty answer.

He flicked a finger to the nightstand drawer. “Should be some in there, but they’ve been in there a while. Not a bad idea to check the expiration date.”

I smiled at the Trojan Magnum box. Yes, they were old but still good. I tore one open and rolled it over his erection, noticing he had a slight curve. He bit his lip as the latex stretched down his length. He was still rock hard in my hand.

“I want to be on top for this first time. Are you okay with me doing that?”

“Yeah, baby. I’m good.”

I straddled him once more, planting my knees at his hips and settling over him. He reached for my hips to help me balance as I took his length in my hand and brought it to my opening.

“You sure about this, baby? Once we do this, there’s no going back.”

“I’m surer about this than I’ve ever been about anything.”

I lowered myself onto him, slowly taking him inside and stretching around him. It had been a long time for me, and he was not a small man. It took me a while to work down on him, lifting and sliding, but he didn’t lunge or force me to go faster. I watched as his jaw clenched and unclenched as he fought to control himself. When he was fully seated inside me, I stopped moving and rested. He pushed himself into a sitting position so we faced each other, touching almost shoulder to shoulder.

His eyes were on mine, and the intensity in them kept me locked in that gaze. Every sense was open. I heard our breaths come together in sync. His hardness flexed inside me, and I gripped him back. My hand came to his chest to feel his heartbeat, and he did the same, placing his palm just over my breast. Our pulses aligned themselves together as they combined into one.

This connection between us was more than physical. There was a depth to this intimacy that opened up to more—so much more that I couldn’t fathom how far it could go.

He flexed again, and I responded, this time with a whimper in my throat. There was no need for frantic pounding, thrusting, or pumping until one of us came. It was building slow and sure and steady.

Another flex.

Another squeeze.

Another heartbeat.

Another breath.

Another flex.

When the orgasm came, it didn’t flash like lightning but rather rolled through me like thunder, booming and deep. I let out a small cry, as it was more than I could contain. Our eye contact never wavered, and his palm pressed harder into my chest as he reached his own climax. We were linked with a strong, powerful force that neither of us could control on our own, but together we could hold the world. There was a bond here that had no limits and simply would not be broken. Some would call it love, but that tiny word sounded insignificant to all I’d experienced tonight. I felt him shoot inside me, filling the condom that I admit I resented, as it was the only barrier between us.

He reached up to brush under my eyes, and only then did I realize there were tears flowing from them.

“You okay, baby?”

“Yes.” I had no other words. Nothing else came to my mind to say.

He leaned in to kiss me. “I get it.”

As much as I wanted to stay like this forever, we had to move sometime. My legs tingled as I shifted off him, and he stood us both up. I smoothed over the muscled planes of his chest and abs, marveling that this was mine.

“You need the bathroom while I deal with the condom? There’s a toothbrush I haven’t opened in the medicine cabinet. Help yourself.”

Once we were both back in the bed, he wrapped us up in a dark blue comforter covered in stars. I recognized some of the constellations he showed me from our night at the Lair. It had been a long, stress-filled day, but it had ended with hope for a better place.

Sleepy words gurgled from my mouth as he took up the spot behind me and spooned into my naked body. “Will it always be like this?”

“I’ll do my best to make it that way, babe.”

I don’t know how long I slept, but I woke up to a heavy darkness. Not scary or pressing, but more like the blanket I used to hide under when I was a kid. Bryce still lay behind me, fitted exactly to my body. His breath tickled across my neck as he slept on.

Then another awareness came to me. Something almost tangible with a gentleness I’d recognize from only one source.

“Camo?” I whispered lightly, barely forming the word.

“I said before, sweetness, he’s a good man. I trust him to take care of you and Pearl, and he will for this lifetime. I’m good to go, ’cause I’m leaving you in good hands.”

A tiny prick pierced my heart. “Do you really have to leave?”

“Yes, my love, it’s time.”

Tears formed in the corners of my eyes. “You’re not mad?”

“Oh, darling, I’d never be mad at you. Life always moves forward, and you have many changes ahead of you. Pearl will grow up and move on. You’ll keep adding to your career, touching people’s lives and changing them for the better. You may even have more children, as you have so much love to give them, and you’ll do it with a strong man by your side. He’s your support. A solid anchor who’s not there to hold you back but to let you soar as you were meant to.”

“I’m going to miss you.”

“I’ll always have a place in your heart, a special one that’s just for me. Now, go do great things, sweetness. Never hide the love you have inside you.”

A soft, cool puff of air brushed over my forehead, as if a small kiss had been placed there.

Then he was gone.

I expected a tearing grief to hit me as it had when I heard the news of Camo’s death. Instead, I was filled with an almost joy that he’d found his place at last.

And I’d found mine.

Bryce shifted behind me, and his arm around my middle pressed inward. “You okay, honey?” his sleep-sated voice rumbled in my ear.

“I’m very okay.”