Chapter Twenty-Two

"You don't want to do it, do you?" Landyn came in from the bathroom, towel drying his hair, another towel wrapped around his middle. It was dark, their guests had gone home, and Landyn had said he wanted a bath. Hephaestus knew that was his mate's way of giving him some time to himself.

Hephaestus didn't need to ask his mate what he was referring to. He was sure his sweet ferret could sense his turmoil through their bond. "It seems like all we ever seem to do is talk." He patted the space next to him on the bed. "But if you're referring to banning the cyclops from Earth, yes I have mixed feelings about it, although I understand why Orin suggested it."

Dropping his towels in the hamper, Landyn skipped across the floor, climbing up on the other side of the bed and snuggling in under the covers Hephaestus pulled aside for him. "If you don't want to ban them, banish them, or whatever else it's called, then don't," Landyn said simply, giving Hephaestus that special smile that always warmed his insides. "You don't have to do anything you don't want to. It was just a suggestion."

"I feel bad enough asking Thor to thump them for me." Hephaestus sighed. The dim light of the room made it easier to confess the darker thoughts he had sometimes. "I know they hurt you…"

"They hurt you, too."

His mate always put his feelings first, but this time Hephaestus needed Landyn to listen. "Hear me out, all right?" He suggested softly. "This is not a simple case of who they hurt, or when, or why. My friendship with them goes back a very long time. It's not easy to turn my back on them now."

Landyn looked at him, his lips tightly shut. Chuckling, Hephaestus shook his head. "Yes, sorry. I do want to hear what you've got to say."

"I just wanted to ask what you think your friendship means to them."

"I wouldn't know. Not much, from the looks of things now."

Landyn stayed silent, the twist of his lips suggesting he could say more, but he wanted to hear Hephaestus's thoughts.

"They have always preferred it when it was just the four of us. Well, mostly it was just the three of them and me, because you see there was a very fine, but distinct, line between us. Those three fought with each other countless times, but they never fell out with each other. But if one of them got angry at me for anything at all, then the other two would take their kin's side. Every time." Hephaestus hadn't seen that so clearly before.

Landyn nodded.

"And then, when you think about it, what did they do on Earth?"

That got an eyebrow raise, as if his mate was saying "I don't know, you tell me."

"They ate, they lounged around the house. Yes, they worked with me in the workshop, but nine times out of ten if there was an order to be finished, they were sleeping in because they'd been out on the town the night before."

Frowny looks and shaking head.

"Exactly. I set up my small business taking commission orders. It was more to keep me busy than anything else, and I wanted to be a part of life here on Earth. I bought my house, I bought the warehouse. I set it up so I could have a small forge without causing any damage to businesses around me. It was my part of carving out something for myself so I could feel as though I have a life."

Hephaestus got two thumbs up for that one.

"All they ever wanted here on Earth was to find men and women to sleep with. Night after night after night. If they weren't talking about who they'd been getting their rocks off with the night before, they were talking about going out again. I gave them their human form so they could fit in down here and what have they done with it? Nothing but sleep around and then sleep because they were tired.

"The only reason they were working so much those last two weeks in the warehouse was because they were trying to prove how you couldn't work with the fire, and how helpful they were to my life. When it was their fault we had so much to do!" He looked at Landyn who was just watching him. "Don't you have anything to say to that?"

"You're doing great on your own, my wonderful mate. Just think about it." Landyn snuggled closer. "You came into being with a strike against you already. You spent the bulk of your early life being made to feel like your life didn't have the same value as other gods. You had your club foot, you got thrown off the mountain, your mom didn't want you, your dad was pissed off with you, there was that horrible business with Aphrodite.

"You constantly refer to yourself as ugly, when nothing is further from the truth, but that's how you see yourself. You've always tried to fit in, and you thought you had that with the cyclops, when all they were doing was using you, too."

"Ouch." Hephaestus rubbed his chest.

"You said they were using you yourself, you're just not listening to the words you're telling me."

"So I should banish them?"

"It's not my decision to make. You will do what you think is the right thing for us, the same as you asked Thor to thump them for you."

"You don't think any less of me for doing that, do you?" Hephaestus hadn't considered it from his mate's perspective before. "I'm not a fighter. I would fight for you if I had to…"

"I know, you were fighting a giant in the kitchen on our first morning together." Landyn sighed. "Don't go thinking you have to be like some macho alpha wolf or something like that, fighting everyone who looks at me the wrong way, like Thor does with Orin. I hate fighting of any form."

"Did you see a lot of that at home?" Hephaestus realized they'd never talked about what Landyn had been through, beyond the vampire incident.

Which I didn't solve either. Zeus did that for us. Admittedly, knowing Zeus, he didn't go and fight Michael or any other vampire who'd spent two years scaring Landyn. It was more his style to ruin that person's business through a computer glitch or something similar. Ruining a person's business could often be far more effective than hitting someone around the head, especially among vampires.

"There were always fights in my house growing up," Landyn said sadly. "I told you before that our kind were raised believing we had to work to provide for the mother of our prospective children. My dad did work. He also drank and slept around every time Mom was pregnant, which was often.

"There was never enough food, which caused more fights, because my dad might not have come home very often, but when he did he expected to be fed. My mom was so worried about losing her bond mate, she spent all the money he gave her on clothes and spa treatments, leaving us kids to our own devices."

"Is that why you didn't go to school much?" Hephaestus knew Landyn was intelligent, but there were some very big gaps in his basic education.

"If I wanted to eat, I had to earn my own money for it. I was lucky that where we used to live, a lot of the neighbors knew what was going on. They had jobs for me from when I was about eight years old, I suppose. I would mow lawns, shovel snow, clean cars, get grocery orders and run errands, just so I could eat."

"Damn." Hephaestus pulled his mate into his arms. That certainly explained Landyn's preoccupation with food.

"It was okay." Landyn was patting him again, soothing him, when it was Landyn that deserved the softest cuddles. "I got out of there when I was fifteen and started working. I got my own place. I made friends. It's just, when people fight I seem to cringe up inside. I can't breathe, I can barely think to move fast enough to hide. It really makes me sick to my stomach and I don't understand why people can be so horrible to each other. Orin seemed to think that Thor's fighting was funny. I could never be like that."

"You're just proving more and more why we're perfect for each other." Hephaestus marveled at how amazing his mate's attitude was, given all he'd been through. I could learn a lot from him. "I'm not a fighter. I don't think I could ever be, although I would always protect you – you do know that, don't you?"

"Yes. The same as I'd do my best to protect you." Landyn giggled. "I'm just not very good at it."

"But you're stealthy," Hephaestus teased.

"And fast." Landyn chuckled with him. When he stopped, he said more seriously, "But any kids we have, they have to be safe. That's an absolute hard line for me. I saw what my siblings went through. I was cuddled by the older ones until they started to act the same as my dad and ignored me. I tried to help the younger ones all I could until I left. But there was only so much I could do. Right up until I got taken in by the vampire, I was sending food parcels to my mom's house every chance I could."

"It's amazing to me how wonderful you turned out, a true spark in a shit pool of madness. You're definitely the light in my life," Hephaestus said. Bending his head, he brushed Landyn's lips with his own. "I promise you safety. Safety and food. You have my vow on that. Always."

Landyn's kiss in reply let him know his vow had been heard, and more importantly, was valued. Just like Hephaestus knew he was himself, in his mate's eyes.