56. Tessa

56

Tessa

C hloe is napping, Cin and Madden are using the gym down in the basement, and Kade went out a while back. The apartment feels way too big and empty without Harry running around or shouting at the TV.

I don't know what to do with myself now he's at school. For the last four years, my primary role has been 'mother'. Sure, I worked, but that was only so I could provide for my children.

With Harry at school, I feel redundant, and even though Chloe is still a baby, I'm experiencing major empty nest syndrome.

Do all mothers feel like this when their kids start school? I don't remember Stella saying she did, but then she's usually too busy writing her smutty books. Chances are she threw a party when Juno and Callum started school.

I put some laundry on and then tidy the kitchen, which is already spotless. Buttons mopes around after me, looking very sorry for herself. She, too, doesn't know what to do without Harry.

When I stand at the kitchen island, drinking a coffee, she stares up at me with big brown eyes.

"You missing him too?" I ask her. She flops down and rests her nose on her paws.

I rinse my coffee mug and then sit down on the floor with her. She crawls onto my lap and whines pathetically, acting like Harry's been gone for a week, not a couple of hours.

When the door alarm blips to say someone's entered the apartment, I don't bother getting up. It's probably the guys. This apartment is as safe as the White House. Nobody's going to get past the beefy guards in the main entrance, not unless they're armed with automatic weapons.

"Hey, you OK?"

When I look up, Kade is staring down at me.

"Yeah." Buttons licks my hand as I stroke her silky body. Even I can tell from my depressed tone I'm not OK.

"Here, I got you something." He holds out a box from my favorite Italian bakery. "Thought you might enjoy some baked goods."

His unexpected kindness is my undoing and, much to my embarrassment, I burst into tears. Kade throws the box onto the counter and drops to the floor beside me. From his horrified expression, he has no clue how to handle an emotional woman.

Candy probably doesn't cry over baked goods.

"I'm sorry," I sob, "I'm being stupid."

"No, you're not. It's OK to feel out of sorts. This is a big day for Harry."

"It is. He's growing up so fast, and it's scary." I always believed Enzo and I would wave Harry off on his first day at kindergarten, like proud parents. How wrong I was.

Kade takes my hand and squeezes it. "I bet he's having a wonderful time."

I know he's right. Harry is a sociable little boy, and he was so excited about starting school. He's probably made loads of friends already.

"He will be."

My tears dry up and we sit next to each other in silence while Buttons snoozes. Kade doesn't let go of my hand, and I'm surprised at how good it feels. But eventually, my bottom goes numb.

"Ready for some cannoli?" Kade asks with a faint smile when I pull my hand away and stand.

"Always." I seriously regret crying now. My face is probably all splotchy and gross. Oh well. It's not like Kade cares what I look like. "Kade..."

"Hm?" He grabs a couple of plates and places a cannoli on each, one for him and one for me.

"Thank you. For the baked goods. I appreciate it."

His head snaps up in surprise.

"No need to thank me. I like cannoli, too." I can tell he's trying to downplay his sweet gesture, but from the way his gaze drops to my mouth, I suddenly get the impression he wants to kiss me, and god help me, I want him to. "Tessa, I--" he starts, but the moment shatters when the front door opens and Cin bursts in all sweaty and full of smiles when he sees fresh cannoli.

"Baked goods? Wow, brother, you must have read my mind!"

Kade jumps back like someone has electrocuted him, and I'm hit with a pang of disappointment.

"Not for you, asshole. Buy your own pastries."

"I'm wounded! How mean." Cin gives me his puppy-dog eyes and flutters his lashes. "Can I have some of your creamy goodness, sweetness?" From the lewd wink, he's more than aware of the double-entendre.

I can't help but giggle at his antics, but Kade is not amused. He rolls his eyes and stalks away, leaving his cannoli behind. My smile slips a little, but it's impossible to be miserable with Cin around. He's too full of himself.

"Oh goody, one for me!" Cin snatches the cannoli Kade was going to eat and gobbles it down in a few mouthfuls.

"You're such a dick," I tell him, not really meaning it. But he just grins and licks his lips.

"My dick is all yours, baby."