Chapter One

Abigail

S eattle, Now

I know I'm dreaming. I always do when the nightmares and the visions come. But I drown in them anyway, tossed like a buoy from one violent scene to the next with nothing to anchor me. This one might be the worst.

A scream rips from my throat as one of the Forsaken—a soulless monster with pale skin and a misshapen mouth—reaches out, grasping the young Valkyrie in front of him around the throat. Her dark hair whips around her face, her dark eyes widening with terror as he lifts her from the floor. Her feet scrabble for purchase on the old church floor, her nails digging into the pale flesh of his arm as she struggles to breathe, fighting to free herself.

But it's useless.

With a vicious snarl, the Forsaken flings her across the room. Her body sails through the air before striking the wall with a sickening crunch.

I feel the life draining out of her as she crumples to the floor, pale and still.

I cry out in terror, desperately trying to reach her. But I have no body here. There's nothing I can do. I'm simply a watcher, forced to witness these atrocities, unable to act to stop them.

This is my hell.

The scene flickers like the shutter of a camera as it changes. Forsaken spread throughout a church, polluting it with their corrupt magic. The Valkyrie lies crumpled on the floor. The Fae race through the dark streets of Seattle.

My mind spins wildly as one tiny glimmer after another flows through me, brought by some seier magic—seer magic—no one, not even the Fae, understands.

I see thousands of snapshots in these moments, paths we might take, things that might come to pass. Not all are certain. What we do moment to moment dictates how the Norns weave the tapestry.

But the strongest visions? Those are all but guaranteed. They will happen. Unless we force them to change.

Another flicker and a vision solidifies. This one is certain, then.

Eitr is overrun, the Forsaken and varulv flooding the streets. Their dark magic and evil pollute everything.

I get pulled into a cabin in the heart of Eitr.

My heart clenches when I see Tori tied to a chair. Her vibrant energy slowly fades as she struggles weakly against her bonds, tears mixing with the red stains on her cheeks until it looks almost as if she cries blood.

Reaper lies on the floor at her feet, a gaping hole in his chest. Even in death, he reaches for her, one hand extended as if, in his final moments, he sought to comfort her.

Outside, screams grow louder—the screams of the Fae. They're dying.

Damrion. Adriel.

No. Gods, no.

Horror and defiance well up inside me, screaming in fury. But it's too late to save them. I feel them slipping away—the biggest parts of my soul being torn from me as they fade.

I scream in agony. In torment.

The scene flickers again, changing.

I stare down at myself this time. A Forsaken in jeans and a hoodie looms over me in the kitchen at the safehouse in Washington—the same one where my sleeping body lies right now. Injured warriors litter the ground. Others are held back by dark flows of magic. The Forsaken is speaking to me, though I can't make out the words. He points at a rippling black shadow in the corner.

A portal, corrupted by their evil magic.

"If I let you take me in their place, you'll let Tori and the other Valkyrie live? You won't harm the Fae?"

The Forsaken nods.

Tears run down my cheeks as I nod and stumble toward the portal. I don't fight him. I don't try to get away. To my horror, I go willingly, letting him guide me into the corrupt portal.

No! I want to scream at myself. No, Abigail. You can't do this!

But I have no choice. I feel the certainty of that truth ringing in my soul. If I don't go, they'll kill Tori and the other Valkyrie, and then Reaper. Damrion and Adriel—the two warriors I'd give up my soul to protect—will die. And then the rest of the Fae and Rissa.

All will be lost.

The vision flickers and changes again.

Below, my body is chained to a stone slab. Agony lances through me as I'm struck by whips of dark magic, the corrupted power searing me. I scream until my voice gives out, thrashing against the brutal onslaught.

Even in the vision, I feel the pain ripping me apart. It hurts. Gods. It hurts.

Another whip slams into me.

I scream again, my body convulsing on the slab.

Suddenly, Light pours into me—not my body on the slab, but me—hot and sustaining. The vision smokes and curls at the edges, burning away.

All that's left is dark and pain. It engulfs me, leaving me drifting in a sea of agony.

Until Adriel's voice sounds in the void, shaking with emotion. "We're here. We're right here, Abigail."

Adriel. Oh, Adriel. He's the strongest Fae I've ever met. So fierce. So broken. I love him in ways I didn't know existed.

"Wake up, ást-meer . You have to wake up now."

Damrion. He never begs for anything, but the leader of the Fae pleads now—for me. My heart aches with love for him, vast and powerful.

And for a moment, I consider staying right where I am. At least when I'm here, for just a moment, the two Fae I love forget that they hate one another. While the visions tear me apart, for the first time in millennia, they're in perfect accord. They aren't snarling at one another. They aren't fighting over me.

They simply stand side by side, united.

I want that when I'm awake—so badly I can taste it. They are my world and every day is a fresh hell, one we can't escape because the Norns tied our souls together. But they didn't ask what we want—and Adriel and Damrion have spent 2500 years at war with one another, loving one another so intensely that somewhere along the way, it turned to hate. Not even my Light is bright enough to thaw the ice.

I've tried. Gods, how I've tried. All I've managed to do is make everything worse. Now, they fight over me, too.

I hate every second of it.

The Valkyrie.

I jerk awake with a choked cry, bolting upright in the bed. Damrion and Adriel stand over me, so different and yet both so alike in this moment.

Damrion blazes with the golden Light of the Fae, vital and warm, every inch a ruler. Adriel is as pale as fresh snow, years of torment and torture in the dark having leached away his Light—at least physically. The scar across his face and his one black eye should make him sinister, but it only makes him more beautiful to me. He's survived so much pain and so much grief, but he still clings to the Light. It blazes within him, vast and bright.

Their faces are etched with worry, their brows furrowed with identical lines as they stare down at me.

They take a step back, their hands falling from my body as relief washes through their expressions.

I grab Damrion's arm, fear pumping through me with every beat of my heart as the vision presses down on me. "The Valkyrie. You have to find the Valkyrie now!"

"Shh, ást-meer ," he murmurs, his gold eyes soft. "It's okay. Everything is okay."

"No!" I snap, refusing to be soothed. This is too important. "The Forsaken are going to kill a Valkyrie. You have to find them!"

A horrified cry breaks from Tori's lips as a murmur goes up. Only then do I realize that all of the Fae have gathered outside my door, pulled here by my screams.

"Please," I plead, staring up at Damrion. I don't say anything else, but he knows what I need. He and Adriel always know.

"Everyone out," Adriel snarls right on cue, spinning to glower at everyone crowding the doorway. "Now."

"You heard him," Damrion snaps, his eyes never leaving my face. "Out."

No one argues with them. They don't dare. Damrion is their ruler. Even if he weren't, when it comes to me, he and Adriel always have the final say. Even if they can't accept what's happening between the three of us, the Fae do. They don't question it.

As far as the Fae are concerned, Adriel and Damrion are my mates. The Fae accept this without hesitation. It's Adriel and Damrion who fight it.

As everyone files out, images from tonight's vision replay in my mind—the way the Forsaken threw the Valkyrie across the room, Tori barely clinging to life, Reaper dead at her feet...Adriel and Damrion dying.

I shudder, bile rising in my throat.

Please , I beg silently, breathing hard. Please let me be wrong this time. Let it just be a nightmare, not a vision of what's to come.

But deep down, I know the truth. This was no mere nightmare...and my visions are never wrong.

Adriel closes the door behind Tori and Rissa before turning back to me, that one black eye locked on my face. "What did you see, little seer? Tell us."

"You were screaming as if you were dying," Damrion adds, his golden eyes fixed on my face. Pain radiates in his voice, as if even now the sound haunts him.

I shake my head, damp tendrils of my red hair clinging to my face. "I already told you," I insist, my voice cracking. "I saw a Valkyrie in danger. The Forsaken..." I choke back a sob, the image of her broken body seared into my mind.

Adriel steps closer, as if he intends to shield me from my memories with his presence. "You're lying to us. You were in pain. We felt it."

"No, I..." I close my eyes, unable to finish the lie as his words register. They felt my pain.

Gods.

I've spent weeks trying to mask our bond from them, to hide it so they didn't know. The moment I felt the bond blaze to life when I found my Light, I buried it as deep as I could. They'll never accept it. Why torture them with the pain of the visions when it'll go nowhere?

But in one single moment, I've ruined it. Now, they know what I've known all along. I'm not tied to one Fae. I'm tied to two. Our souls are bound by some ancient magic even they don't understand. And they'd rather kill each other than spend an eternity with me.

Damrion and Adriel exchange a look, something unspoken passing between them. Despite everything, my heart thrills at their connection. It's so powerful. In unguarded moments, when they forget that they hate one another, it blazes as bright as the sun. But they refuse to see it, refuse to even acknowledge it.

My throat threatens to close up at the thought that I may never get to see that day. That we might not survive long enough.

"Please," I beg, desperate to focus on anything other than my own misery. "You have to hurry. If you don't..."

I can't bring myself to finish the sentence. The weight of grief presses down on me, threatening to crush me. I've seen so much death, so much pain. But this is different. More immediate. More devastating.

I can't lose them. I won't survive it.

"You've been masking the bond," Damrion says, refusing to drop the subject.

" Faen ," Adriel swears. "How long?"

"I..."

"How long have you known your soul is tied to ours, Abigail?" Adriel demands, his tone short and clipped. He's angry. Really angry. "How long have you been hiding the bond from us?"

"I was trying to protect you."

Adriel growls wordlessly, his expression fierce as he stalks toward me.

"Protect us? Nei , Valkyrie," Damrion growls, anger snapping in his eyes as he advances on the bed. "We are Fae. It is our right to protect you."

Adriel's fist clenches at his side, frustration radiating off him in waves. "Damn it, Abigail," he snarls. "How are we supposed to protect you if you won't let us?"

"This isn't about protecting me!" I snap back, my own frustration boiling over as I jump to my feet. "It's about saving a life!"

"And we're supposed to forget that your life is at risk, too?" Adriel growls, his hand slashing through the air. "Nei." He steps up in front of me, grasping me by the shoulders. "I'll let this world fall before I let harm come to you, bittesm? ljós ."

"Adriel."

" Nei , Abigail." He touches my cheek, his rough hand gentle. He's killed thousands, but he touches me as if I'm priceless. Something fierce burns in the depth of his eye, searing his expression. "You must survive. If you fall, we fall."

A tear slips down my cheek. He catches it, wiping it away.

"Don't cry, bittesm? ljós ."

But I can't help it. I'm living half a life, my soul torn into pieces because theirs are in pieces—shattered long before I was even born. And I don't know how to fix it.

"You should have told us," Damrion says from behind us, weariness and pain in his voice.

Damrion.

I pull away from Adriel, guilt crashing over me like a tidal wave.

"Damrion, I..." I spin to face him, my heart aching.

He refuses to meet my gaze, and I want to cry all over again. Without even meaning to do it, I've hurt him. Always, I'm hurting one or the other of them.

"We'll talk when we return," he says, striding toward the door, "All of us. This...situation between us cannot continue."

My heart clenches at his words and the resignation in his tone. I want to reach out, to beg him to fight for us, but the words stick in my throat. I'm too afraid of what he'll say.

Deep down, I know he loves Adriel just as intensely as he loves me. Their souls are bound to one another just like they're bound to mine. And yet…he won't fight for us. He won't fight for himself.

I don't understand.

I don't want Adriel—at least, I don't want only Adriel. My heart beats for both of them. My soul cries out for both of them. The same way I know his cries out for me and Adriel—the same way Adriel's cries out for me and him. But he's so wracked by self-loathing that he refuses to let himself feel it.

The first few months I was in Eitr, he was so reserved and distant. His golden eyes would meet mine across the courtyard, but there was always a wall there, impenetrable as the layers of ice capping the mountain.

It thawed in increments, so slowly I didn't even realize it was happening at first. But little by little, it did. He softened, started coming to visit me, and then spending hours with me every day.

And Adriel... Gods, Adriel. His one dark eye would follow us, filled with anger I didn't understand. I'd catch snippets of their arguments sometimes, my name a point of contention between them.

"She doesn't belong here," Adriel snarled one night, not realizing I was close enough to overhear.

"She's Blooded," Damrion replied, his voice tight. "Where would you have her go? Who else would you have protect her if not us?"

I was devastated, thinking Adriel hated me. Even when he started coming to visit me a few days later, I thought he hated me. It took a while for me to realize that it wasn't hate driving him, but fear.

The last time he let himself love, it nearly broke him. And now here I was, making him face it all over again. Making him admit that he never stopped loving Damrion, either.

He fought it hard.

He's still so angry at Damrion for leaving him to die. And Damrion still carries so much guilt for it. It wasn't his fault. He didn't know Adriel was alive and being held captive. But Adriel's pain isn't rational and neither is his grief. Is it ever?

If millennia hasn't healed what's broken between them, I don't know what the Norns expect me to do. Tying our souls together seems cruel, but fate never cares what we want. If it did, I wouldn't have visions.

I thought things were going to change between us the day the Forsaken attacked Eitr. In the chaos and fire, after I burned them out of the village, Damrion and Adriel found me.

"Abigail!" Adriel roars, rushing toward me through the courtyard, smoke a fiery nimbus around him. He looks like an avenging angel, Magn lighting him up like the sun.

Damrion is hot on his heels, blazing with golden Light, his eyes on fire. They race toward me, their steps perfectly in sync.

Somehow, Damrion reaches me first.

"Damrion!" I sob, flinging myself at his chest. He catches me, pulling me into him. But he doesn't hold me alone. Adriel seams himself to my back. I'm caught between them, sandwiched between their strong bodies as I shake in their arms. "I...I burned them out! I killed them all."

"Shh, ljúfr," Adriel breathes, his lips against my throat. "Everything is okay now. We're here. You're safe."

For the first time since the Forsaken attacked, I feel safe, as if nothing can hurt me so long as I'm in their arms. But it isn't enough.

"Please," I whisper, begging for something I don't even understand. "Please."

They know, though. They move as one. Adriel plunges his hand into my hair, craning my head back. Damrion's hand curls around my throat.

Adriel's lips crash into mine, fierce and desperate. He kisses me like a man drowning, like I'm the air he needs to breathe. His tongue delves into my mouth, tangling with mine as he consumes me. I moan into the kiss, my body melting against theirs.

Damrion angles my head, allowing Adriel to deepen the kiss. I surrender completely, letting them take control, letting them possess me. In this moment, I am theirs, body and soul. Nothing else matters except the slide of Adriel's lips on mine, the rasp of Damrion's breath against my throat, and their hard bodies pressed to mine.

When Adriel finally pulls back, we're both panting. His single dark eye blazes with desire. I shiver, caught in his intense gaze, my heart thundering in my chest.

Then Damrion's fingers tighten on my throat, commanding my attention. I turn my head to meet his molten gold eyes, drowning in their heated depths. He lowers his head to mine, slowly, reverently. His lips brush against mine, soft as a whisper.

I whimper, straining closer, silently begging for more. He complies, sealing his mouth over mine in a slow, sensual kiss that turns my bones to liquid. Where Adriel devoured, Damrion savors.

He kisses me deeply, thoroughly, claiming me with each stroke and slide of his tongue against mine.

Behind me, Adriel's hands skim down my sides, his touch searing me. He traces my curves reverently, his calloused fingers igniting flames deep inside me. And for once, with his hands on me and Damrion's lips locked with mine, I know exactly what it means to be complete.

I nearly revealed the bond between our souls right then and there. But as soon as they pulled away, they went right back to fighting.

And now they can barely look at each other. The anger between them has only grown, and I'm at the center of it.

I'm tearing them apart.

A tiny part of me wishes I'd never come into their lives. Maybe then they could find peace with each other. I'd sacrifice my own heart to heal theirs. But I can't. And they've had 2500 years to make peace without me. If that didn't do, I don't know what will.

I love them both. It's as simple and as profound as that. When Adriel smiles, my heart soars. When Damrion laughs, it's like the sun breaking through the clouds. And when they touch me, I feel like I'm flying. They are my heart. My soul. Without them, nothing makes sense.

But now, they'll have to figure it out without me.

There's no other choice.

To save their lives, I'll do what I must.