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19

It was time for dinner when Pee Wee and I returned to the group home. Mrs. Grambling, one of the houseparents, had made chili

with jalape?o corn bread since both Mrs. Kennedy and Miss Grant had gone home after the funeral. It looked and smelled delicious,

but I couldn’t get my appetite going. We were all around the table, and Pee Wee was stirring his chili but not eating it.

My soul was aggrieved, as Mama would say. Nothing seemed to soothe me, including food, which was unusual because most of my

life, food had been my balm in Gilead. Finally, Pee Wee asked if he could go take a nap.

“I hate for you to be alone. Why don’t you just stay here with us? You don’t have to eat if you don’t want to.” I was afraid

to let him out of my sight.

I glanced at Darren and Charlie, who were looking sympathetically at Pee Wee. These last few days had been difficult for them too. They were both sensitive boys, and they’d gone out of their way to be nice to Pee Wee, from giving him the last piece of chicken at dinner the night before to Charlie offering Pee Wee his dessert, insisting that he didn’t like banana pudding. These boys in the group home didn’t have much, but what they did have, they were willing to share with each other.

“I’m o-o-okay,” Pee Wee insisted. “Just t-t-tired.”

Jason leaned over and spoke to me in a low voice. “I’ll sit with him until he dozes off and stay close until he wakes up.”

“That might be good,” I whispered back. I turned to Pee Wee. “Pee Wee, Mr. Jason will go with you. I need to get some work

done in my office. If any of you boys need me, just come knock on my door.”

I patted each boy’s head, then went to my office. Almost as soon as I entered, the phone rang. I sighed and answered it.

“Hello,” I said, hoping whoever was on the other end would get to the point quickly so we could hang up and I could catch

my breath.

“Hey, Miss Katia.” It was Chad. He spoke in a low voice, but I recognized it immediately.

“Chad,” I said in a hurried voice. “Chad, where are you?”

“I shouldna called. I gotta go,” he said. My panic set in. I couldn’t let him hang up. This might be my last chance to convince

him to tell me where he was so I could go get him.

“No,” I said. “Don’t hang up. Just talk to me. Tell me where you are. I can come get you. You don’t have to stay there.”

“You can’t fix everybody’s problems, Miss Katia,” he said gruffly. “Some problems is bigger than what you or anybody on the

right side of the law can handle.”

“Chad, you’re not safe there. You know that.”

“How’s Pee Wee?” He changed the subject, but I didn’t give up. If I could continue talking to him, I could find out where he was.

“Pee Wee is as well as can be expected. He misses you, Chad,” I said. I decided not to tell him that Pee Wee’s mama died.

I didn’t want to add to his already huge burden. “Chad, are you hurt? Has anyone hurt you? Please, let me or Mr. Jason come

get you.”

“I can’t come back there,” Chad said. I heard the turmoil in his voice. “Tell Pee Wee I’ll be checking in on him from time

to time.”

“Tell me where you are, Chad, please.”

“I gotta go, Miss Katia.”

“Please don’t hang up,” I begged. “Are you with your mother? Is Cobra there?”

“Naw. They had to run out for something. They told me to stay in the house. Cobra say he can tell if I use the phone, but

I had to take a chance. Had to see how y’all was doing.”

“Chad, if they aren’t there, just run,” I said, feeling my panic rise anew. “Just run or let me come get you, and—”

“He say he’d kill Lena if I left. Said if I even went outside this house without his permission he would kill her. I believe

him, Miss Katia. I don’t think I could live with that. I know she ain’t been the best mama, but I can’t let him kill her.”

“What can I do to get you out of this situation, Chad? We need to get you away from Cobra and Lena.”

“There’s nothing you can do,” he said in a resigned tone.

“Yes, there is. Tell me where you are—let me come get you,” I begged again.

He paused for a long time. I didn’t want to rush him, but I also worried that Cobra would return before I could get to Chad or get help to him.

Once more, he went quiet but then finally spoke in a near whimper. “Okay. I’m not far. I’m at—”

“Give me that phone,” I heard a deep voice order that I immediately recognized as Cobra’s even though I had only heard him

speak a few times.

“Who this?” he snapped at me.

“Cobra, this is Miss Katia from the group home. Please let me come get Chad.” I hated having to ask that awful man for anything,

but I didn’t have a choice.

“Chad ain’t going nowhere and he gone pay for using this phone when I told him not to,” he said in an angry voice. “Busybodies

like you gone get this boy killed. If he calls you again, you best hang up. You dig?” He slammed down the receiver.

I wiped away a tear and called the police. They assured me that “someone would get on it”—code for we’ll do nothing . I called Mrs. Gates and told her the same thing I told the police.

She sighed. “I am sad to hear this news. Sounds like Chad is lost to the system for now. Hopefully he’ll turn up before things

get any worse than they already are. Thank you for keeping me in the loop.”

She hung up. Everyone was washing their hands of Chad. I always grieved the loss of a boy, whether it be to the system or

to the streets. I wanted every one of them to be a picture of success on my wall. The idea that Chad might not end up on my

wall, wearing his cap and gown, was almost more than I could handle. I dropped my head into my hands.

“Are you okay?” someone asked me.

I lifted my head and saw Seth standing at the door, a look of concern on his face. I hated having him see me, yet again, in

tears.

“No, I can’t say that I am okay,” I admitted. “But I need to go check on the boys.” I stood, but Seth entered the room and

eased the door shut.

“Tell me what’s wrong, Katia.” He walked over to me and led me to the couch. We sat side by side, and as my eyes met his,

I almost had to turn away because of the amazing amount of kindness shown in them. “What happened? Did the police call with

some news about Chad?”

I shook my head and filled him in on my conversation with Chad, ending my update by sharing what Cobra said.

“That bastard,” he said, his eyes filled with fire. “How could he do a young boy like this? Look, Chad said they aren’t far

from here. Let me ride around and see what I can see.”

“No. Please don’t. No one should go after Chad, because that would mean going after Cobra. I couldn’t bear it if anyone else

I care about gets hurt or worse. For now, we try and believe in the police.”

Seth’s face softened. “You care about me?”

My cheeks grew warm. I didn’t think about what I’d said before I said it. I didn’t want him to think I was having feelings

for him—even though I was.

“I didn’t... I mean... I...”

He moved closer to me and placed his hand on the side of my face. “I care about you, Kat, and I know this is very sudden,

and I know we need to take things slowly, but maybe we could...”

He leaned in. I could almost feel his lips on mine when there was a discreet knock at the door. Thank God the door was closed. We jerked away from each other like guilty teenagers. I stood and went back to my desk.

“Come in,” I called, and Jason entered the room.

“Hello, Mr. Taylor,” he said. One of your men was asking for you.”

“Thank you, Jason. And please—call me Seth. Mr. Taylor is my father,” Seth said as he got up. “I’ll see you later, Kat?”

I just nodded. He looked at me for a few extra seconds but then left my office. I cleared my throat and turned to Jason, who

was looking at me quizzically.

“Everything okay, boss?” he asked.

I told him about the conversation with Chad. Like Seth, he offered to ride around and try to find Chad, but I told him the

same thing I told Seth, which was we should give the police time to look.

“I don’t know that they will have much luck, but let’s at least give them the rest of the day. Cobra is dangerous and I don’t

want to do anything to make the situation worse,” I said, releasing a loud sigh. “How’s Pee Wee?”

“Knocked out,” he said, going over and sitting on the couch. “He barely made it to the room before falling sleep, hard and

fast. I’ll keep an eye on him.”

“Good,” I said. “I haven’t been sharing some of the things going on with the board, but I think it’s time to bring you up

to speed.” As I told him about my conversations with Mr. Arrington and Mrs. Hendricks, his face contorted with anger.

“They can’t get rid of you. You’ve turned this group home into a sanctuary for these boys.”

“If they have the votes, they can get rid of me. So I need you and me to spend the rest of this week preparing you to take

over. I can’t guarantee that they’ll offer you the executive director position, but I want you to be ready in case they do.”

“I wouldn’t take it. Not this way.”

I reached out and placed my hand on his. “This is bigger than me or you. This is about the boys and this group home continuing

to thrive. If they offer you the position, you’ll take it because you’ve earned it and the boys need you. Period.”

“Maybe it won’t come to that,” he said.

I smiled sadly. “We shall see. But for now, grab those files over there on the cabinet. You and I have work to do.”

The idea of leaving the group home and trying something different had crossed my mind over the years. This work was sometimes

thankless and heartbreaking, but most of the time it was the most rewarding job a person could ever do. I looked up at the

wall of honor, filled with photos of young men who’d passed through these doors and exited them to become successful men who

worked hard and had established families of their own. They were the reason I continued to show up every day. I truly prayed

that I’d be able to continue the work I’d started, but if not, I vowed to make sure Jason was ready to take the helm.

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