Chapter 12

Chapter Twelve

Sophie

Even though the “lesson” had pretty much ended, Reid was still here. I wondered if I should ask her if she wanted something to eat or watch something, but I didn’t want to make her feel like she had to.

Before I could figure out what I should do, she stepped away from my bookshelves. I’d brought her over here to tell her about the books I liked and see if she could give me some specific recommendations, but I’d gotten completely sidetracked. As usual. My plans always went awry.

“I should probably get going. I need to have an actual dinner and not more cupcakes.” She still snagged another cupcake and the empty glasses she’d brought over that I’d rinsed out in the sink.

“Thanks for agreeing to do this. Maybe next time you could help me with like, dressing? Maybe? Or like, giving the signal.”

“The signal?” she asked, licking the cupcake in her hand. At the appearance of her tongue, I completely forgot what I’d just asked her and had to backtrack.

“Yeah, the signal you give when you’re in public to let people know you’re sapphic and that you know they’re sapphic too.”

“Ohhh, that signal. I got you. Well, it’s kind of look and kind of an upnod sometimes? It’s also kind of a vibe. You really should just come to Sapph some night and observe.” That sounded like a good idea but thinking about it made me start to sweat.

“Maybe,” I said.

“You’re gonna have to dive in the deep end sometime, Soph,” she said, and my ears caught on the nickname. She hadn’t called me that before.

“I know. But I think I need to go a little bit slower, if that’s okay?” I hoped she didn’t think I was being a baby. I knew I was, but that was the thing with anxiety. It made mountains out of mole hills every day. Made monsters appear under your bed.

Reid studied me for a second and then nodded once. “Okay. We’ll have another session here, young padawan. It’s really too bad that these lessons don’t involve lightsabers because that would give me an excuse to spend money on one and I haven’t been able to justify it.”

I giggled. “You don’t need my permission to buy a lightsaber, Reid. Go ahead and buy a lightsaber if you want.”

She smiled and it made her face light up. “Maybe I will. I’ll find some way to write it off on my taxes.”

Both of us laughed again as she lingered by the door.

“Seriously, though, thank you. I didn’t have anyone else to ask for help and you’ve already done me a huge favor.”

“Don’t worry about it. It’s my responsibility to teach the younger sapphics about our cultural practices.” She was ridiculous sometimes, but I liked it. Reid was different than I expected, but in good ways.

“I’m so glad I have you to lead me, oh wise one.”

She snorted. “Have a good night, Sophie.”

“You too, Reid.”

I was at work in the school library the next day reading a book when Reid sent me a message. I knew she worked Wednesday nights, but I didn’t think she went in until five or six.

I meant to ask you more about fanfic last night, so I don’t know if you’ve seen these yet, but here are some of my favorites that are super sapphic. There was a list of ten links, and I wasted no time in looking through them. Two I had already read, three I had flagged to read later, and most of the others were new to me. A few were from fandoms that I didn’t follow, so I’d have to do a little bit of homework first to get into them. That meant I had three new shows I needed to watch immediately, which would take up a good amount of time. Thank you, Reid.

That’s quite a list and now I know what I’m doing for the next few weeks. These are my absolute favorites that changed my life and made me cry and ripped my heart out of my chest. You’ve been warned. I almost told her to make sure she looked up the tags, but Reid knew what she was doing. This woman wasn’t new to fanfic, I could tell.

Ohhh, thanks. These look great. I’ve read two of them and agree that I was emotionally destroyed for at least a week. I decided to send you some of the fluffier ones but once I know you better I’ll send you the really twisted stuff.

I burst out laughing and a few people stared at me as I wished I could crawl under the desk and disappear.

It wasn’t a shocker that Reid would be willing to read some of the wilder fanfic. She and I both had some unusual books on our shelves in common. I had no shame about what I read and enjoyed, which didn’t square with my anxiety, but if no one else knew what I was reading, then why did I care? No one could judge me if they didn’t know. There was a reason that Larison had promised to delete my fanfic account if anything ever happened to me. My parents couldn’t know about my favorite tags and tropes.

I would bet that Reid had a similar deal with her friends too.

Someone came up to the desk to check out a book and I scanned it and went back to sending messages with Reid.

She really opened up once you got her talking about fanfic, I discovered, and she had strong opinions.

I wished we were talking in person, but she had to head off to work before my shift ended and I headed home, so we were going to miss each other.

If you start reading, send me updates and reactions She sent.

Don’t worry, I will I responded.

Talking with Reid was so nice . Since Larison was gone, I hadn’t really made any new friends, but I guess I could count Reid as a friend now? Maybe? She was a neighbor at the very least.

I got home from work and made myself a quick dinner before opening one of the fanfics that Reid had sent me on my ereader. It was a fluffier slice-of-life kind of story, which was perfect for my mood. Some of the others she’d sent were a little bit sexier, but I’d get to those ones later.

An hour later, I got up to get some water and a cupcake, not wanting to set my ereader down and having some issues with not wanting to stop reading.

This fanfic was so cute I wanted to cry. The author had also commissioned some fanart that was in between the chapters that was so gorgeous I thought about seeing if I could buy prints or something from the artist. I only stopped to go find them online and follow their social accounts so I could go back later.

Before I knew it, I was barely keeping my eyes open and if I didn’t get off the couch, I was not going to make it to my bed.

I unclenched my hand from my tablet and set it down, stretching out my fingers. I really needed to get one of those pillow holders or a stand or something so I wasn’t stuck holding it for hours on end.

Rubbing my gritty eyes, I stumbled to the bathroom to wash my face and brush my teeth and put my pajamas on before I fell into bed and let myself read a little bit more. I added a pillow holder for my ereader to my cart before I completely passed out.