Chapter 5

Rebecca glanced at Cassidy,who sat in the passenger seat. "You're staring at me. Why?"

"You're beautiful," Cass answered simply.

Rebecca shook her head. "You've been quiet since the playroom, Cassidy. Did I do something you didn't like?"

Cass barked out a laugh. "Are you kidding me? I don't think I've ever come that hard in my life! And with you, that's saying something!"

Rebecca hid a satisfied — prideful — grin. "So, you're too tired to speak?" Again, Rebecca took her eyes off the road for a second to look at Cassidy. "And you're still staring. I know how you look at me, Cassidy. This look here," she said, waving a hand in Cassidy's direction. "Is questioning."

Cass shook her head. She opened her mouth to answer just as Rebecca pulled into the Vales' driveway. She took off her seatbelt, ready to get out to run around and open Rebecca's door.

"Stay, Cassidy."

Cass's hand froze on the door handle. "They're expecting us, babe."

"They'll wait. What's going on?"

Cass sighed. She fully admitted she was preoccupied while they cleaned up and got ready for their night with Ellie and Hunter. She had been contemplating how to ask Rebecca the questions swirling around in her head. Fuck, did Rebecca really think she didn't enjoy her time with Mistress?

"Y-you've never done that before," Cass said finally, nervous as hell. She didn't want to ruin the experience with questions that may upset Rebecca. Cass didn't even know why she couldn't just be grateful and move on.

Rebecca tilted her head, studying Cassidy's apprehension. "I've never done what?"

Great. She's going to make me spell it out. "You know, what happened in the playroom," Cass stammered. Oh, sure. Every other time, she was plagued with a mouth with no filter. Now she couldn't form a coherent sentence.

"Me going down on you?" Rebecca guessed. She frowned. That wasn't true, was it? "I've tasted you before, Cassidy."

Cass groaned. "You saying things like that does things to my body, babe." She cleared her throat, squirming in her seat. "You've, um, tasted me from your fingers, but never like that. I-I always assumed it was something… like some kind of punishment. Before. And that's why you didn't…"

Rebecca used her extensive knowledge of Cassidy to decipher everything Cassidy was trying to say. It wasn't like her wife to be so… shy with her words. That meant she was afraid of hurting Rebecca.

"Punishment? From Samantha?" Rebecca guessed. Cassidy nodded. "N-no." Her eyebrows furrowed as she thought about her past. And there was the headache that came along with it. "I never… did that to her. Samantha was the true definition of a sadist when it came to me. Her pleasure came from my pain. I haven't done that to anyone except you…." She looked at Cassidy. "I've really never done that for you before?" Cassidy shook her head. "I'm sorry."

Cass took Rebecca's hand and kissed her palm. "No, babe, I don't want you to be sorry. Like I said, I always assumed you had a reason not to."

"No. I honestly didn't realize… I know your taste, Cassidy. I love tasting you. And I know I'm not exactly an expert, but if you enjoyed it, I definitely want to make that a habit."

"If?! Fuck, babe, it…I… Yes, I enjoyed it immensely. But, um…"

"But?"

"Do you have to be Mistress to do it? Does it take that kind of mindset, or…?"

Rebecca smiled. Cassidy wanted to share this new sensation in the bedroom with her wife. Not only in the playroom with her Domme. "I don't have to be Mistress to fuck you with my tongue, baby."

Cass threw her head back and groaned again. "Why, babe? Why do you have to work me up like that when we won't be home for like another hour?"

"Hour?" Rebecca laughed. "That's how long yoga is. Then we have to eat. And, of course, catch up. That's at least three and a half, four hours."

Cass growled. "It's not nice to tease me, babe."

Rebecca pulled Cassidy to her, their lips close. "But it's oh so fun," she whispered before crushing her mouth to Cassidy's. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the porch light of Hunter and Ellie's house blink, and she couldn't help but laugh.

"What?" Cass pouted after being forced out of a passionate kiss. Rebecca nodded toward the house, and Cass glanced behind her. Sure enough, the porch light kept turning on and off. "Pussy-blocker," Cass muttered as Rebecca continued to laugh. Cass climbed out of Rebecca's Mercedes and trotted to the other side to open the door for her wife. "Laugh it up."

"I'd rather be lapping it up."

"Come on!" Cass whined. Great, she was going to be wet and uncomfortable all night. Maybe tonight was a good night to switch roles in the playroom, she thought as she placed her palm on the small of Rebecca's back and guided her up to the house. A little punishment was surely warranted after all the teasing. First, they had to get through socializing with their mean best friends. "Open up, Dad. We know you're in there flickering the damn porch light!"

The front door opened to a smirking Dr. Hunter Vale and her beautiful wife, Ellie. It was hard staying mad at such joyful faces. Especially since they were two of the nicest people Cass had ever known in her life.

"I apologize for my wife," Ellie chuckled. "She thought letting you know we could see you making out in the driveway would be funny." She kissed Cass on the cheek and gave Rebecca a fierce hug.

"Ha!" Hunter tsked at her wife as she welcomed their guests. "She wanted to turn the hose on the two of you! Hey, Becca," she said, kissing the top of the shorter woman's head. "Cass." She slung her arm around Cass's shoulders. "Want to sit out on the deck and kick back with a beer?"

"I'd love a beer. But you know they'll be bending over a lot in those yoga pants, don't you? Does the view on your deck beat that?" Cass glanced over her shoulder and winked at Rebecca.

"Not even close," Hunter laughed and then lowered her voice conspiratorially. "But if I ever want to see my wife out of those pants again, we're not allowed to bother them while they're finding their zen."

"Leave your shoes at the door,"Ellie instructed, her voice calm and inviting. "Then come and sit in front of me on your mat."

Rebecca wondered if she could get Ellie to record a meditation audio that she could listen to every night. Ellie's voice was so soothing. She slipped her shoes off and followed Ellie to a mat in the middle of the room.

"Your studio is incredible, Ellie. I always feel so serene when I'm in here." Rebecca sat and crossed her legs, mimicking Ellie's pose. But she couldn't help looking around. She wasn't lying about the tranquility of this room. Rebecca remembered when Ellie was designing it. Ellie had wanted a place where she could relax and work on her recovery after her devastating car accident.

What Ellie produced was a yoga studio with white walls that reflected the sun shining through floor-to-ceiling windows—the ocean view from those windows aided in quieting any chaos of anyone who walked in there. Ellie had chosen a holistic design, using earth-toned hues and textures that gave Rebecca a sense of freedom and mindfulness.

"I'm glad," Ellie responded with a gentle smile. "Are you ready?"

Rebecca nodded and took a deep, cleansing breath.

Ellie waited, observing Rebecca. There was a disturbance beneath the calm. But knowing Rebecca, Ellie would have to gently coax the clutter from Rebecca's busy — brilliant — mind.

"Let's begin with our grounding. Since we're already in Sukhasana, we'll stay here. Now let's do a gentle twist."

Rebecca placed one hand behind her with the other on her opposite knee, then twisted her torso.

"Straighten your spine, Rebecca. Sit tall." Ellie switched sides, knowing Rebecca would follow along. They went through four more stretches in their grounding before moving on. A gentle warm-up followed to prepare their bodies for more vigorous poses.

"How's your hip?" Rebecca asked as she performed cat/cow. If Cassidy could see me now, she mused with a small smile.

"It only hurts when it rains," Ellie joked. "Seriously, though, most days are good. It gets tired quicker than it used to, so I've shortened my days in the kitchen at the diner to appease Hunter's concerns." She stood up, gesturing for Rebecca to do so as well. "Ready for sun salutations?"

"Ready."

Ellie started their following sequence, going easy on Rebecca. She wanted Rebecca to stick with this so Ellie wouldn't scare her away with poses that were too difficult—even with Rebecca's experience taking Ellie's classes, the time away warranted a slow comeback.

As Rebecca positioned herself into the Tree pose, a wave of dizziness washed over her. She brought her leg down just in time to catch herself.

"Whew." Rebecca blinked a few times to try and clear her vision.

Concerned, Ellie went to Rebecca and helped her back down into a comfortable sitting position. "Are you okay?"

"Y-yes. Sorry. It's been a while since I've done this. I just need to find my balance again."

"Haven't you been utilizing your Zen area at home?" Ellie asked, rubbing Rebecca's back gently. She knew about the renovations to Cass's gym because Rebecca had requested Ellie to help her design it. Though not as big as Ellie's home studio, it did give Rebecca a peaceful place to practice.

Rebecca blew out a breath. "I haven't had much time to use it, unfortunately. But I'm going to have more time now. That's why I'm here. You're going to be so sick of me," she chuckled quietly, but even to her ears, it wasn't a mirthful sound.

"I would never," Ellie smiled. She knew now that she was definitely right about a disturbance within Rebecca. "Why will you have more time now? You seem to have more clients than ever these days. Including me, which, if you need to put me on the back-burner, I more than understand."

"No, no. I'm happy to help you — and anyone else in our group — expand. But I think our little group will be my only clients for the foreseeable future. I have decided to…" Rebecca shook her head. "I hate the word retire, but that's it essentially."

Ellie's eyebrows rose. "Retire? You're not old enough."

Rebecca reached over and patted Ellie's hand. "This is why you're my favorite."

She took a deep breath and noticed Ellie doing the same. She felt Ellie's fingertip tap the back of her hand. One, two, three, four, five. Then, a double tap and Rebecca let her air out slowly. One, two, three, four, five. Ellie had told her before that the way to a clear and untroubled mind is to purge the dam that blocked the ability to admit what was bothering you.

"I feel old, Ellie. And tired. I have been trying to top my latest great success since I was ten years old."

"Why? You must know your accomplishments are admired, but they certainly don't define who you are. Especially not to us."

"Oh, I think I know that deep down." Rebecca sighed. "When my parents died, I… spiraled. I thought if I'd just been better, if I hadn't talked back or made them worry, they wouldn't have left me. Their death was my discipline. At their funeral, I promised them I would do better. Be better. I wanted to make them proud. So, I worked my ass off. I graduated a year early from high school, double majored in college, and had CEOs of major companies seeking me out to build them a solid business plan while I was still a student. Then… I met Samantha, and I faltered. Despite my better judgment, I got involved with her and was punished again."

"Rebecca, you did nothing to deserve what Samantha did to you."

Rebecca would silently agree to disagree. She made the choice to be with Samantha and stay. That was something Rebecca had to live with.

"After that," Rebecca continued as though Ellie hadn't said a word. "I had to start over. I worked even harder this time. I needed to make my parents proud again. I turned a drowning club into the most successful members-only club in the city. My consulting business is thriving. And… I'm exhausted."

Ellie empathized with Rebecca. In many ways, they were as alike as they were different. "What I'm hearing is something had to give, and you didn't want that something — or someone — to be Cass."

Rebecca tilted her head, giving Ellie a small smile. "You would have made a great therapist."

Ellie chuckled. "I'll leave that to Aunt Wills. But, you know, being in the service industry for years, you learn how to observe. And being a mother, you learn that being proud of your child isn't contingent on how successful they are. When Jessie told me she wanted to attend medical school, I was so proud of her. Then, when she came to us and said she wanted to drop out because it was too much, I was even prouder of her."

Rebecca raised a brow. "Prouder that she dropped out?"

"That she had the courage to change something in her life that wasn't making her happy. And that she trusted us enough to come to us to talk about it." Ellie reached over and wiggled one of Rebecca's toes. "I think Aunt Wills is an extension of your parents, Sweets. And I don't think she could be any more pleased by the woman you've become. The trauma in your life could have easily been your undoing, yet you fought back. And now you're choosing a different path for your mental health and happiness. As well as Cass's."

Well, when you put it that way, Rebecca thought, her soul feeling a bit lighter than it did when she walked in here.

"With Cassidy's and my schedules, we barely have time for each other. And when we do, it's all about the sex. And that's entirely my fault, not Cassidy's. It's my insecurities that make me feel like I have to give Cassidy sex, or she'll find someone who isn't as used up as I am. Is that residual shit from Samantha? Probably." Rebecca scoffed. "I should be over my past by now. Cassidy makes me happier than I've ever been. And she makes me feel like I can slow down now. I have nothing to prove to Cassidy. She shows me that every day. It's time I show her I believe her."

"Thanks, Hunt."Cass clinked her beer bottle to Hunter's in a silent cheers, then took a long pull from it. The ice-cold bitterness of the pale ale hit the back of her throat, and she hummed with approval. "This is new."

"Yeah. Mo has found a new hobby. I was skeptical at first, but she isn't half bad at it. Of course, this is her fiftieth try at pale ale."

Cass laughed. "Fiftieth time is the charm. Not bad." She took another swig. Yep, she could get used to having a brewer in the group.

"How's it going with you, Cass? We haven't seen you two much lately." Hunter sat back in her glider, propping her feet on the matching ottoman. She'd never thought of herself as a rocking chair kind of woman, but Ellie certainly changed her mind about that.

"Yeah, sorry about that. Ever since the gallery opening, I've had commissions coming out my ass." Cass winced. "Sorry. That was crude. I'm, uh, trying to do better with that."

Hunter raised her bottle in a salute. "It's all good. We're proud of you. Our own renowned artist!"

"Ha! I don't know about renowned, but I sure as hell am busy." Cass frowned. "So is Becca — or was. We've been having trouble finding time to be with each other." Cass set her beer down and leaned her elbows on her knees. "We find time for sex, but I think we both need more, ya know? Sorry if that was TMI."

"Not at all. It's all part of being a best friend," Hunter smiled. "You said Becca was too busy."

Best friend. I like that. The two of them met through Rebecca and had become close. Of course, that was after Cass got over her stupidity of thinking Hunter and Rebecca had been a thing.

"Yeah, Becca has decided she wants to slow down a bit."

"Retire?"

Cass put a finger to her lips. "Shh. Don't let Becca hear you say that word! She hates it. But, yeah. Kinda." She lowered her head, contemplating how much to say that wasn't betraying Rebecca's confidences. "I think Becca deserves to slow down. She's worked hard most of her life, you know?" She looked up at Hunter. "She told me some asswipe said some awful shit to her yesterday during what was supposed to be a consultation. Of course, she put him in his place. That's Rebecca. But she shouldn't have to. And I think it upset her more than she lets on. So, yeah, I'm all for this new chapter."

"As a doctor, I highly recommend that Rebecca does whatever makes her happy," Hunter said after taking a drink of her beer. "But what about you? If Becca has all this time on her hands and you're still busy, how does that help?"

Cass thought about how it helped quite a bit before they had to leave to come here. Then again, that was the sex part. That was one area Rebecca and Cass had no problem with. Hunter was right. How would that sway their relationship if Cass was still busy while Rebecca wasn't? Would Rebecca eventually get tired of waiting for Cass?

"I'm an artist," Cass said finally. "I can work from home or anywhere Becca wants to go."

"But as I understand it, the work you've been doing lately has been for charity. You willing to give that up?"

"Hunt, I would give up everything if it made Becca happy. She's my world." Cass shook her head. Rebecca wouldn't be happy with Cass's decision to scale back with her, but hopefully, they'd find their balance together again.