23. Scott

23

SCOTT

I rounded the corner between the study and the foyer. Hannah stood at the hall closet, one hand on her stomach, her entire body poised for flight. It seemed like the slightest movement might send her running. I’d seen that look often enough to understand it at a glance. It was fear and uncertainty with a heavy dose of guilt.

“Hannah?” I made sure my tone conveyed my concern but kept it low and unassuming. She was clearly upset and distracted, and she jumped at the sound of my voice.

“Scott.” She pushed off from the door, a smile popping out and sending my heart into overdrive. “Did Liddy find you?”

“She did.” I approached with a steady step, keeping an eye on Hannah’s reactions to every move. If she wanted me to stay away, she didn’t show any sign of it. If anything, she invited me closer with her outstretched hand. “She asked about spending the night again.”

Hannah raised both eyebrows. “Did she, or did you bring it up first?”

“You know, I can’t remember,” I said as I pretended to look up at the ceiling. Holding her hand, I spun her around in a pirouette and kissed the tip of her nose when she slammed into my chest. “Either way, I told her I’d talk to you.”

“Oh, sure.” She pretended to scowl. “Make me the bad guy.”

“No way. I’ll tell her she has to go home if that’s what you want.” I splayed a hand over my heart. “Cross my heart.”

She slapped a palm over my mouth. “Don’t finish that saying. Please.”

I covered her hand with mine and kissed it. “Sorry. Old habit.” I continued when she lowered her hand. “I’d love for you and Liddy to stay again tonight.” We’d offered to let her move back in, but that step was too much for Hannah to accept right now.

“I’ll think about it.” A groove appeared between her eyes.

“What’s that about?” I traced the line with my thumb. “You’re worried.”

“It’s nothing.”

“Hannah.” I waited for her to look at me. “You can talk to us. You don’t have to deal with everything on your own anymore.”

The sudden curl of her shoulders made me glad I’d pushed. This was an unusual situation for me. I’d spent years sleeping with women once and then letting them go. Asking about their problems and listening to their concerns went against years of my life, but I did it for Hannah because I never wanted to be the reason she walked away. Ever since Arthur apologized and she started coming back around, the desperate sense of barely holding on to our rekindled relationship kept me on edge.

Liddy’s laughter mingled with Ryland and Arthur’s voices. She’d tore into the study with her new giraffe, laughing and talking so fast I lost half the conversation. Ryland understood her better, but I’d had a sense that Hannah needed me. She was always one step behind Liddy, so when I didn’t see her after a few seconds, I’d gone looking.

“I ran into Liddy’s father.” Hannah eyed me from the side.

I kept my face carefully expressionless. “And?”

The brightness in the house dimmed at the knowledge we might be on borrowed time. Hannah always said she hated Chad, but he’d had a hold on her once. Someone her own age might be able to tempt her back. Was I strong enough to let her go if that was what she wanted?

She crossed the foyer and entered the study on the opposite side from the room where Liddy played. “He wants to get to know Liddy.”

The white-hot surge of jealousy that ran through my veins surprised me. I’d never felt it this strong before. I’d never loved anyone this way, either. I tamped down the curses battling for dominance and tempered every part of my body that craved giving into the violence in my blood. Chad lost his parental rights the day he walked away. End of story. It wasn’t my place to say that or to admit to my feelings. “Are you thinking about it?” The pain made its way to my voice, deepening the already gruff growl to a deep thrumming that vibrated in my throat.

“I am.”

Ryland and Arthur walked over. “Are what?” Ryland asked.

“Dinner is ready.” Deena popped into the room like she’d been waiting for the perfect moment. “Liddy, would you like to have dinner with me?” She cupped a hand around her mouth and whispered, “I made us a special fairy table.”

“Yes.” Liddy bolted toward Deena. “Will all the fairies come?”

I caught Deena’s eye, mouthing the words thank you. She ducked her head and ushered Liddy from the room. I swear that Deena has a sixth sense about when we need to have an adult conversation without Liddy’s little ears overhearing.

Once we were alone, Hannah walked between Ryland and Arthur into the dining room. Her silence and quick steps warned me to wait before pursuing the conversation.

After we were all seated around the table, Arthur spread his napkin in his lap and pointed at me. “What are we discussing?”

“It’s not a discussion.” Hannah forked a handful of green beans onto her plate.

I shot both Arthur and Ryland warning looks. If we fought too hard against this, we risked pushing Hannah away. I hoped I could hold onto my own emotions long enough to let her talk it through.

Poking at the food, Hannah wrinkled her nose. “Has the chicken gone bad?”

I sniffed my plate. “Smells fine to me.”

She shook her head and pushed her plate aside. “I ran into Chad while on my way here. He wants to spend time with Liddy. Said he wants to get to know her.”

My two best friends froze in place. Nothing moved. Even the air took a break, feeling thick and tense.

When Ryland shot a look at me from the corner of his eye, I lowered my gaze, silently telling him I’d lose it if I said anything.

“And you’re willing to let him.” He said it as a statement. “He is her father, after all.”

Relief sounded in her exhale. “He deserves the right to see her. He’s not that bad of a guy.” She stopped and stared past us. Doubt crept into her eyes as she chewed on the inside of her cheek. “He may have hurt me by leaving. But Liddy needs her father.”

“She deserves a father. One who loves her unconditionally.” I almost whispered the words having no idea if she even heard me. Keeping them in hurt too much. The usual brightness in the dining room dimmed. The joy Hannah brought with her, the love that turned our house into a home, had been threatened.

Arthur’s knuckles popped as he curled his hand into a fist beneath the table. If Hannah heard it, she didn’t acknowledge it. Ryland slid his napkin back and forth through his fingers and focused on Hannah’s face. We all waited her out. Her reluctance to continue spoke volumes about her real feelings for Chad. The initial jealousy eased. He’d not won her over. Still, the man had more rights to Liddy than we’d ever want, and time with Liddy included time with Hannah. It took weeks before she left Liddy alone in a room with any of us. She’d trusted us with her daughter. Nothing in the world showed trust stronger than that.

“What do you think?” Hannah asking for our opinion sent a new wave of tension through the room.

I leaned forward, my elbows on the table, my fingers steepled in front of my lips. “You really want to know?”

“Yes.” She sat across the table from me, with Ryland on one side of her and Arthur on the other. The circular table usually felt intimate, but tonight I hated the sliver of space separating us. “Am I making the wrong decision?”

“We can’t answer that for you,” Ryland said at the same time Arthur muttered, “The bloody bloke needs to bugger off.”

I snorted a laugh. My thoughts exactly. This Chad bastard had his chance and he’d ruined it. Arthur almost walked away from Hannah, but he’d come to his senses. Of all of us, I expected him to be the most lenient considering his horrible relationship with his daughter. Having him on my side was an unexpected bonus.

Ryland shoved his shirt sleeves up to his elbows. “Hold on. We can’t condemn him for making a stupid mistake. We don’t know anything about him.”

Hannah shifted to look at Ryland and then Arthur. Arthur turned and faced her. “Did he ever do anything abusive toward you? Anything you feel is a threat to yourself or Liddy?”

Her head shook side to side. “No. He was always nice. He treated me well. That’s why it was a shock when he walked out on me and said he was too young to raise a kid.” Her chin quivered. “I loved him. I was devastated.”

“Fucking bastard.” The curse slipped between my pressed lips. I held up a hand when Ryland started to speak. “I have a right to my opinion. I’m pissed. Deal with it.” I stood and walked around the table, dragging my chair behind me. I plonked it down beside Hannah and sat. Our knees bumped, and the touch settled me more than it had the right to. “He doesn’t deserve a second chance.”

Hannah swallowed hard. “No?”

“No.” I remained firm. “He’s had years to reach out. Where was he going today when you ran into him? Was he planning on looking you up or did he happen to stumble across you and make a decision on the spot?”

“I…I don’t know.”

Her confusion begged me to stop but I’d gone too far to back down now. “Liddy has us. Any one of us would give anything to be her father. Do you have any idea how much we wish the situation was different? Ryland is perfect father material. Arthur has more parental instincts in his pinky finger than this Chad does in his whole body. That’s what Liddy deserves. She deserves someone who puts her first every time, not in a coincidental opportunity that might not even be real.” I’d really gotten going, and even though I knew I should stop, my heart overtook my brain. I took her hands and kissed each wrist. “Why should Chad get to step up and be her father? Because he contributed to her DNA? Fatherhood is more than that. Fatherhood is love and sacrifice. Any of us would give our life for Liddy. For you.”

From behind Hannah, Arthur made a slashing motion across his throat, demanding I stop. Ryland remained behind me but I could heard the disappointment in every sigh.

“I’ve never been a parent. I have nothing to give you but my support and my love. Liddy has always been safe with us. I love her like she’s my own. I’d adopt her, right here and now, if you’d let me.” I’d thought of it often enough over the past few months to place a call to our lawyer. He’d reassured me that it was possible and could be done. All we needed was Hannah’s approval and for Chad to sign off on his parental rights.

Hannah’s stunned expression morphed in a blink. She released my hands and threw both arms around my neck. Her lips crashed into mine, bruising them with the ferocity of her kiss.

Arthur’s jaw fell open. I fought the grin and scooped Hannah from her chair to my lap. I’d meant every word, and my passionate speech obviously touched something in Hannah. She knew we cared about her and Liddy, but maybe she’d needed to hear it. Wasn’t that the complaint Arthur’s ex-wife always made? She’d wanted to know he loved her, to hear it all the time.

Why was it easier to say I’d die for her than to admit I’d fallen in love with her?