Chapter 18

First to the finish line

"I can't believe we're going to miss your birthday," Rosalie says with a frown, holding onto her boyfriend's arm.

"I know," Gabi replies with a sigh. "But my sister decided to outshine me and get married on my birth week," she adds, shrugging. "There's nothing I can do about it."

"Which is why we're celebrating today. Now, can we please go?" Madi asks impatiently.

"A summer without Gabi," Aiden muses, adjusting the cap on his head. "I wonder what that will be like."

"Quiet," Grayson retorts with a dry look.

Aiden chuckles, but Gabi shoots him a playful glare. "I heard that," she says. "And lucky for you, it won't be the whole summer. We're only going to be gone for a week or so."

Grayson lets out a scoff. "Still the longest I've gone without hearing your voice."

His girlfriend beside him giggles, covering her mouth with her hand. Gabi, however, just smiles. "Don't worry. I'll be sure to call you guys every day so you don't forget it."

"And you're going with her, I presume?" Aiden asks me.

I nod, sensing everyone's attention on me. "Yeah. It's kind of the whole reason I came here," I say with a nervous laugh, though that's not entirely true. I just came to see the girl standing beside me.

Aiden smirks, knowing that's bullshit, but he doesn't say anything.

"The cab's here," Madeline says, ushering us into the cab. "Everyone get in. We're going to be late."

"Calm down, princesa," her boyfriend says with a laugh, holding onto her arm. "We still have time."

She huffs out a breath. "Well, if someone hadn't taken their sweet ass time getting ready," she says, with a pointed glance at Gabi with narrowed eyes. "Then we would be there already."

Gabi scoffs, flicking her long brown hair behind her shoulder. "You can't rush perfection."

My face breaks out into a grin as I stare at her. She really is perfect. Her black baggy pants hanging low on her hips, and the white crop shows off her tanned stomach, blinging with the belly button piercing she got on her sixteenth birthday.

Madi pulls back the seats. "You two want to go to the back?" she asks, smirking at us. "It's more private there."

"What the hell are you playing at?" Gabi murmurs, furrowing her brows.

Madi glances at me for a second, before turning her attention back to Gabi. "Just trying to make room," she says with a smirk. "Is that a problem?"

Gabi turns to face me and I shrug in response. "That's fine."

"Great," Madi says, stepping aside so we can climb into the back.

Once we're all seated, she shuts the door, and the car drives off.

"Have any of you gone go-karting before?" Grayson asks.

"Yeah. A couple of times," Gabi replies.

"I've gone a few times with Leila. I had so much fun beating her," he says, swinging an arm around her shoulder.

Leila scoffs. "Until today. I'm going to win."

"We'll see about that," he replies before leaning down to kiss her.

"I've gone once, with James. It was fun though," Lucas says. "Kinda wish he was here."

"Too bad he'd rather bang his boyfriend all day long," Gabi jokes.

Lucas shakes his head, laughing along.

"I actually haven't gone before," Madi says.

"Me neither," Rosie adds.

Grayson grins down at his girlfriend. "Another first to check off."

"Oh great," Gabi murmurs, glancing at me. "We've got a front row seat to their love making." She fake gags, and I let out a laugh.

"Do you really hate seeing them in love?" I ask her, genuinely curious.

She sighs, shaking her head slightly. "No," she admits. "I love to tease them and kid around, but I'm actually really happy for them. I like seeing them happy."

"But?" I prompt, knowing that's not all.

She sighs again, meeting my eyes just for a second before turning away, gazing out the window as the landscape breezes past us. "But I wish I could have that," she admits quietly. My chest tightens as she continues. "Sometimes I think that I'm completely unlovable." Her voice wavers, and she lets out a soft laugh to cover it. "I think people like versions of myself I constructed for them. They like the jokes and the loud, funny Gabi. But if anyone ever really knew me…" She laughs bitterly. "They'd run the other way."

Her words break me. Does she really think she's unlovable? God, I just want to grab her and look her in the eyes and tell her I'm right here. I'm right here, and I love her so fucking much. I didn't even have a choice. It just is . Like the fabric of time itself.

I was destined to love this girl.

"That's not true," I say instead, stuffing all of the words I really want to say deep inside. "I'm right here, Gabi." And I love you . "And I'm not running away."

She turns her head, meeting my eyes. "You did once."

My stomach caves in. "Gabi—"

"And you will again," she says as if it's what I want to do. I didn't want to leave her when I ran. And I don't want to leave her next month.

I reach out, clutching her face in my hands. "I didn't leave because of you," I tell her, needing her to understand that she was the only reason I stayed as long as I did. "And I'm not running from you." Our eyes lock together, and I try to tell her everything I'm feeling with my eyes. "I'm here to stay for as long as you want me." My heart picks up pace, and I brush my thumb over her cheek. "I've seen every part of you, and…" I pause, closing my eyes. I still love you. "And we spoke almost every day for the last four years," I continue, snapping my eyes open. "That won't change just because I go to school somewhere else."

"Not every day."

I frown. "What?"

"You said we spoke almost every day whilst you were gone," she clarifies, shaking her head. "But after you left, you didn't speak to me for almost two weeks."

My jaw clenches, and I drop my hand. "That won't happen this time," I promise her.

She swallows. "How do I know that?" she asks. "I don't think I can handle it if I lose you."

Does she not understand that she's attached to every fiber of my being? It doesn't matter how much distance is between us. She's a part of me. Always has been. "You won't lose me," I assure her. "Ever. And the reason I didn't reach out had nothing to do with you. It was all my messed up issues."

Her brows dip. "You really expect me to believe that?"

I search her eyes, hoping to find a flicker of recognition, that she remembers what happened that night, but her gaze remains blank. My shoulders slump with disappointment.

"Of course," I say, trying to keep my voice steady. "It's the truth."

"We're here," Madeline says, breaking the moment as I lift my head to see the indoor go-karting arena through the window.

I glance back at Gabi, breathing out a sigh of relief when she gets out of the car. Following suit, I step out, hoping she believes me.

What happened that night had nothing to do with her. Sure, I was messed up over what went down between us, but I didn't leave because of it.

It was everything that happened after that was the problem.

"Woah," Rosie says, looking around the arena when we walk in.

It's huge, dark, and filled with blue lights all around. My eyes drift to Gabi when she looks behind her shoulder at me. "You want to race me?"

I let out a laugh, loving her competitive side. "I thought that's what we were doing."

She shakes her head. "Only between us," she says. "These guys will probably slow us down anyway."

Grayson twists his head. "Did you forget I basically breathe cars? I've been driving longer than any of you."

Gabi waves him off, turning her attention back to me. "So? What do you say?"

I grin. "You're on."

As we approach the go-karts, Grayson whistles in admiration. "Are you sure you want to do this, angel?" he asks Rosalie, securing a helmet on her head.

She beams, looking up at him. "Absolutely."

"Can she even drive?" Aiden asks.

Grayson places his own helmet on, glancing at his best friend. "I've given her a few lessons in my car," he replies with a shrug. "She's not bad."

Aiden's eyebrows shoot up. "Damn. You must really love her. You don't even let me look at your car for too long."

He smiles, his eyes softening as he glances at Rosie. "Yeah. I really do."

Once we're given the rundown and set up in the go-karts, I glance over at Gabi. "First to the finish line when the time runs out…"

"Wins," she finishes for me, her grin widening. "I can't wait to beat you, in real life this time."

I let out a laugh, pulling the front of my helmet down, and turn my attention to the track.

The buzzer goes off, and my foot presses down on the gas, the go-kart behind me zooming past. My eyes lock on the black leather jacket, noticing Grayson is right in front of me. I speed up, tapping the back of his go-kart, making him slow down enough for me to move past him.

"What the fuck?" I hear him mutter behind me.

I let out a laugh as I race beside Gabi, glancing at her for a second before she zooms past me, and turns the corner.

Another go kart races past me, and I make out the blonde hair under the helmet as Rosie hits the side of Gabi's go-kart. I take that as my advantage and catch up to her.

Her head twists and she lifts the front of her helmet. "Two more minutes," she calls out.

I lift my helmet, flashing her a smile. "And I'm right beside you."

"Not for long." She drops her helmet back, and speeds up, zooming past me once again.

I glance back, spotting the rest of the guys way behind, except for Grayson who's on my tail. I press down on the gas to speed up, tapping the breaks slightly when I need to turn the sharp corners.

"Ten."

I glance up, spotting the timer counting down. Shit. Time's running out.

I glance at the go-kart in front of me as Grayson zooms past me. I'm currently fourth on the leaderboard, but he's not who I'm racing with. I grip the steering wheel, and focus on the track, the pedal to the metal as I try to catch up to Gabi.

"Five."

I'm right behind her, and she glances back, noticing me.

"Four."

I try to speed up, but Gabi spins to the right, blocking me from moving beside her.

I grin, taking that as my opportunity to spin the steering wheel to the left, driving the opposite way until I'm right beside her.

"Three."

Her go-kart revs as she speeds up, moving slightly in front of me.

"Two."

We're neck and neck, only a second away from the finish line. I see Gabi glance at me, and I smile under the helmet. I love how competitive she is. I love how much she wants to win, no matter what.

"One."

Lifting my foot off the gas, I watch as she zooms past me through the finish line, my own go-kart crossing it a second later.

The buzzer goes off as we slow our go-karts down, and come to a stop.

"I won," Rosie says, lifting out of her go-kart, her pink dress swaying as she rips off her helmet and runs toward Grayson. "I actually won."

He catches her like it's nothing and grins, bringing their lips together. "I'm so fucking proud of you, angel." He grabs her face in his hands looking at her like she's everything. I know that feeling well. "Looks like my lessons actually paid off."

I turn my attention to Gabi as she gets off the go-kart, and lifts the front of her helmet, eyes locked on me. "I beat you," she says with a grin.

"You did." I blow out a breath, ripping off my helmet before I approach her. "Congrats."

She blinks up at me, her beautiful face in the helmet. "I actually won. I didn't think I'd win."

I let out a laugh, taking off the helmet from her head, and drop it to the ground. My hands smooth out her hair. "You were talking shit the whole time," I say with a raised brow.

She sighs. "I know. I wanted to win, but I didn't think I would."

I smile, unable to stop myself before I lean in, and press my lips to her forehead. "You should always believe in yourself, pretty girl."

She looks up at me when I pull back, and our eyes lock together like a magnet.

"I can't believe you're leaving tomorrow," I hear Rosie say.

I tear my eyes off Gabi, looking at all of the guys, staring back at us. I meet Aiden's eye, and the guy is smirking.

"Actually, we need to leave right now," Gabi says, glancing up at me. "We still have to pack, and the drive there is quite far."

"You're not packed?" Madi asks, her eyes widened in shock. She shakes her head. "Why am I even asking? Of course you're not."

Gabi rolls her eyes. "There's plenty of time," she says. "Besides, Chris already volunteered to help me."

I blink, looking down at her. "I did?"

"Of course," she says with a sweet smile that melts my insides. "You know I'm hopeless without you." She tugs on my hand, pulling us out toward the exit. "Let's go."

I wave the guys goodbye as Gabi walks on ahead of me, and Aiden nudges me when I approach him. "I saw that," he says.

I furrow my brows. "Saw what?"

He gestures toward Gabi. "You slowed down at the finish line." He breaks out into a grin. "Why did you do that?"

I can't even deny it. I just let out a laugh and look at Gabi seeing her smile at her friends. I knew I could have won back there, but… "Look how happy she is."