Chapter 5

Polly

S eptember is one of the least humid months in Sydney… normally. But an early spring storm left rain pelting against my window, and my soft cotton sheets clinging to my body as I yawned and stretched my legs.

I wonder if it’s like this at home.

Home.

Imagining what those self-righteous assholes would think of last night’s shenanigans brought a sly smile to my face.

Slut. Whore. Skank. Hoochie. Slapper. Jezebel. Bimbo. Town bike. You name it. My once-stellar reputation as the daughter of successful local businessman Murray Hart was ruined. The fault lying directly at the feet of my former best friend. The blonde-haired, blue-eyed angel of Byron Bay, Evie Austen. And her equally nauseating husband, Nate. And for what?

A measly case of seduction, manipulation, and slight cyber-bullying?

Woopty-fucking-do.

In truth, the Austen-Myers scandal was the first notch in my bedpost. After harmless attempts to destroy my nemesis’s happiness resulted in marriage, a perfect little life, and perfect babies, I cut loose, dining out on a smorgasbord of hot, not-so-hot, and even a few average guys and girls. And what happened to me? I was slut-shamed, marked with the Scarlet Letter, and run out of town.

The double standard was blinding for two reasons.

One: Pre Evie—Nate Myers was the biggest manwhore Byron had ever seen. But were his escapades admonished? No. He may have been a bit of a joke, but overall, Nate was treated as a hero, labeled a real man’s man. Exonerated with the go-to claptrap of “boys will be boys,” “he’s just sowing his wild oats before settling down,” and all that other male privilege bullshit.

Two: Nothing was done to Evie that hadn’t been done to me.

In high school, she straight-up stole the then-love of my life, Luke Bailey.

Not only did she take him. She broke him. He then broke me. So, I broke her. At least, I tried to.

Ughh. I hate them. Not wanting to spend another second thinking of them , I used years of compartmentalizing to redirect my thoughts to something more enjoyable. More... rideable. “I can’t believe I didn’t get his name.” Releasing a squeal borne of equal parts frustration and thrill, I groaned, flopped onto my belly, and planted my face into my pillow. Some toddler-like flailing may have occurred, too, but all that stopped when Luna tapped me on the shoulder. Turning to face her, I waited for her to pop on her cochlear before offering her a calm-ish, “Good morning, sunshine!”

“Did I hear a girly squeal?”

“You sure did.”

Rumpled from sleep, she rubbed her eyes and stared. “Since when do you girly squeal?”

“Since I had my first taste of cowboy juice. Giddy up, babe.”

Luna sat against the headboard, naked as the day she was born and giving zero fucks about it, an evil smirk teasing her lips. “I’m pretty sure I—I mean, Katie—was the one tasting his juice, and yeah, we both agree it was pretty squeal-worthy. As was your grand finale. I can’t believe you took a photo of your snatch and left it on this phone.” Our laughter filled the air, but what Luna didn’t know was that I’d also left my number, something I hadn’t done with a guy since Nate the Mistake.

Shaking with giggles, I collapsed back onto Luna, resting on her thigh as I stared up at the ceiling, not wondering or hoping whether he’d call. “Hey, that mouth and those eyes deserved a lasting memory. I swear, Loon. I’ve never come so hard.”

Luna gasped and slapped my shoulder, “Never? Not even with me… or Katie?”

“Sorry, babe. Cowboy and his talented tongue have stolen prime position. Now stop bitching and get up. We got shit to do.”

A lot of it, too. The day’s to-do list included my daily workout, a gynecologist appointment at twelve, and an ASL refresher session at the advocacy group where Luna and I volunteered. Friends were a rarity for me, but Luna had attached herself to my hip during my first day there, and there was no getting rid of her, especially after we discovered our kindred kinks. She even got me a job at her family’s snooty restaurant. She was exactly what I needed when I first arrived in Sydney. For what was to come that day, too.

“Why the fuck can’t they make these things easier to put on?” Blinding light was the first thing I saw when my head popped through the neck hole of the fetching paper gown.

“Because then your bestie wouldn’t be able to take photos like this.”

“Bitch, you could have helped me, you know.”

“Yes, but then I wouldn’t have gotten the photo, duh.” She turned her phone to show me her handy work.

“Good lord.” Fighting laughter, I tried to snatch her phone but failed. “Delete it now. I look like a bear coming out of hibernation.”

“Kind of, yeah. But a cute bear all the same.” She snapped one more pic, this time of my ass hanging out the gap at the back. “You know what? I’ve never noticed how short your arms are. You’re more of a T-Rex than a bear.”

“I am not!” I was. This was not the first time someone had pointed out my stubby limbs.

“You so are. That’s why you couldn’t reach around to tie the bow on this thing.” Giving me her best dino impersonation, she dug her elbows into her side, held her hands in front of her boobs, and flapped them at the wrist. Long-held insecurities demanded I take offense, but she looked so damn ridiculous I had to laugh.

“You’re a dick.”

A disgruntled tut came from the other side of the curtain that appeared to be made of the same blue crap I was wearing. “And you’re also late. Are you almost ready, Miss Hart?”

“Sorry, yes, I am.” I slid the curtain across to reveal a very unimpressed, yet beautiful doctor. “I couldn’t do up the gown.”

Luna poked my elbow. “Tiny arms. It’s a tragedy.”

Doctor, whatever her name was, scowled at me but smiled at Luna. “Yes, well, if you and your girlfriend would like to follow me, we can get the scan underway.”

“I’m not her girlfriend.” Luna flushed red and pushed me aside. “I’m here for moral support ‘cause she has no one else. She is a bit of a loser. No offense, Pol.”

“No. Of course. None taken.” As payback, I held her hand, pressed a kiss to her knuckles, and refused to release it as we followed the doctor into her office. The harsh, clinical lighting and the sterile scent were a chilling prelude to the question I dreaded—the one I loathed most.

Dr Maloney sat, nodding to the two empty chairs opposite the pristine desk. “You may be aware that Dr. Singh is on parental leave. I will be looking after all her patients until she returns. Now, Miss Hart, can you tell me why you’re here today?”

“You’re kidding me?” I snapped, almost slipping from the seat. “Why, after umpteen visits where I’ve repeated myself with every word being documented, do I need to repeat it all? I’m sure it’s buried inside your fancy MacBook Pro, waiting to be discovered.”

Not a flitter of emotion crossed her face. “Thank you. I’m aware of how medical records work, but since this is the first time I am seeing you and am likely to continue doing so should you proceed, I would like to hear everything from your perspective.”

This bitch. I rolled my eyes and grumbled. “Fine. Here we go and pay attention. I’m doing this once and don’t expect me to know all the medical lingo. I’ve blocked it all out.” I swallowed the lump of noxious memories lodged in my throat, and took a breath, filling my lungs with air so I could get it all out in one go. “Around three years ago, I was a passenger in a car driven by my sister. I’d taken my seatbelt off to lean into the back for my jacket, and as I did, she drifted off to sleep and slammed us into a tree.” My body curled in on itself, something happened every time some prick in a lab coat or scrubs forced me to relive that morning. Hence my reluctance to do so. “The impact forced my body into the side of the steering wheel, causing severe abdominal trauma, plus spontaneous uterine rupture. Along with my uterus, I lost one kidney, one fallopian tube, and one ovary. My existing endometriosis further complicated the mess they left behind.”

Revealing my innermost pain, or what would have been had I had a heart, earned me a curt nod and another question. “Thank you for that, Miss Hart. And to confirm, you are here today because you’re hoping to harvest and freeze any retrievable eggs from your remaining ovary. Is that right?”

“That and to steal more of these gowns.” I crinkled the paper between my fingers. “They’re very fetching.” The crack I was hoping to produce in Dr. Maloney’s glacial fa?ade did not appear. She remained focused, but when I followed her line of sight, I realized it was not me she was focusing on. She wasn’t looking at me at all. Doc only had eyes and a sultry smile for Luna.

Lovely.

The next thirty minutes were spent on my back with an ultrasound probe shoved in my vagina, while my friend and the lady doing the probing flirted relentlessly. Their chemistry was… well, let’s just say Doc was way more interested in Luna’s vagina than mine. For someone who craved attention, it felt weird to admit how welcome not receiving it was. Their nauseating awkwardness proved a welcome distraction.

After finishing the examination and removing the probe, Dr. Maloney motioned for me to sit before she washed her hands and sat behind her desk. Facing the diagrams I had stared at for hours during each appointment, I held my breath and gripped the leather armrest on my chair, my nails scarring it with crescent moons. “Everything looks to have healed well after your surgeries, Miss Hart. There is minimal scar tissue and active endometrioses, and the number of follicles on your remaining ovary and the hormone levels on your blood work show that vitrification should be a viable option.”

“Vitrification?” Luna asked, batting her lashes while twirling a blonde curl around her finger.

“Egg freezing,” I replied. “You know, the reason I am here?” The thing I am doing for Mum.

“Ohh.” Luna chuckled, “You’re so clever, Dr. Maloney.”

And that’s it. “Okay, are we done here?” I snapped, rising to my feet without waiting for a reply. “I feel like I’m standing in the way of what could be a hot date.”

Blinking several times, Dr. Maloney slowly shifted toward me, her patient. The blush coloring her cheeks was annoyingly sweet. “Yes. Of course. My apologies. We’re done. This can be a life-altering decision for any woman. Take your time, and if you decide to move forward with the procedure, just call and make a booking. I presume you have the number?”

“Yes, I have the number. That’s how I booked this appointment. And here.” Biting back my smile, I grabbed some paper and a pen from her desk. “If you decide to book in with my friend, here’s hers.”

After twenty flirtatious goodbyes, all excluding me, I maxed out my credit card and dragged Luna to my car. Perhaps one of the filthy looks I’d shot her during goodbye palooza had been noticed because she slung her arm around my shoulder, forcing me into a cuddle. “This was a big thing for you, and I stole your thunder.” Her tone was laced with remorse. “I just couldn’t help myself. That was one sexy doctor. My face was so on fire I thought my cochlear would melt. I hope she messages me. Do you think she will?”

I wanted to tell Luna I was happy for her, that I could see the snap crackle, and pop between them, but admitting to my joy for my friend while conversely feeling self-misery was too gooey, warm, and selfless. I had an image to uphold. “Sure, I bet she’s penning the proposal as we speak.”

Ping! As if on cue, a phone beeped, but much to Luna’s disgust, it was mine. “Oh, maybe that’s her. Maybe Doc wants to share?” I gave her a flirty wink. “Let’s see, shall we?”

Unknown: You are a naughty little Princess, aren’t you? I think you need to be punished.”

“Oh my god. Speaking of faces on fire… It’s him, isn’t it?” Luna made a dive for my phone, but I snatched it away just in time.

“Who?”

“Don’t who me. You know who. Your cowboy.”

“Pfft. Please. He’s not my anything, Loony. Unlike you, who is Hot Doc’s future wife.” My eyes darted to the screen again, picturing his expression when he found the photo.

“Polly. You’re practically swooning. It is him! Oh my god, let me see.”

“Uh, no way. This is stupid and immature, and ... private. And he will probably never message again, so there’s no point. I’m deleting it.” I had no intention of deleting it.

Ping.

Oh shit.

Unknown: I see you read me. What, no sassy comeback? Has my naughty girl gone shy on me?

My heart not at all fluttering, I glanced up to find Luna’s arms crossed over her chest as she smirked. “Never messaging again, hmm?”

“Smugness doesn’t suit you, Luna. Now fuck off and let me read.”

Me: Not at all. I was just stepping out of the shower. I’m dripping wet.

Unknown-Sounds awesome. Let’s Facetime??!!

Me: In your dreams, Cowboy.