Chapter Fifty-Five Ivy

CHAPTER FIFTY-FIVE

Ivy

I go through the motions as I make my way back to town to meet Ginger at Annalise's Nail Bar for our girl date. A girl date I don't know if I can handle right now. I'm too emotional, until the moment I walk in the door and Ginger squeals and pulls me into the most comforting hug ever. Now I'm thinking maybe these next couple hours are exactly what I need before I face Wade. Before I change everything between us.

"I was wondering if you were going to stand me up, babe. I've already had almost one glass of champagne without you." Ginger smiles at me with her perfect smile

"I'm guessing people don't stand Ginger Danforth up often," I tell her, taking my place next to her.

"How is your mama?" she asks. "Champagne?"

I shake my head. "No thanks, just orange juice, I have a lot of work to do this afternoon when I get back." And I'm pregnant … It repeats in my mind every other second as if I could ever forget. "And my mama is … okay. Off to her new facility. I'm hoping it helps her," I finish.

Ginger squeezes my hand. "Timing is everything, babe. You can think you know what you want, you can think you have control, but you don't, maybe it wasn't your mama's time before. Maybe this is it."

"I hope so. I just have to get through Florida and then I can spend some time with her, let the training hands take a little more on with Angel for the next month or so. This is important."

"Speaking of which, you're wearing my boots on Thursday—they're the good luck boots."

"Deal." I smile as we both get a sudsy foot bath.

I spend the next twenty minutes listening to Ginger tell me all about the drama Cole is going through with Gemma, how he's worried she might try to get more time with Mabel now that she's showing signs of actually trying to be a mother. Hearing her talk about him tells me she's a lot more involved with CeCe's brother than even CeCe may know. If I wasn't such a wreck right now, I would be more curious as to what the actual story is with them, but I'm realizing my heart is elsewhere during this visit.

"Oh fuck," Ginger says as she takes a big gulp of her champagne. "You might want to reconsider one of these." She holds up her glass.

I'm about to ask why when I follow her gaze to hear the bell for the door chime and find two pretty—and loud—blondes walking into the nail salon. The loudest one is talking, like she's letting everyone know she's arrived. She's tall and leggy; she almost looks like a more weathered version of Margot Robbie.

Ginger leans in. "That's Janelle, Wade's ex-wife, and she's a goddamn treat," she whispers as the taller blonde's eyes lock with mine across the room. They narrow as if she's asking herself how she's never seen me before. As if she knows everyone in town and I'm clearly the outsider.

"Well, well, well, look what the cat dragged in, literally," Ginger says as Janelle and her friend cop a seat right beside us.

"Long time no see, Ginger. Time to find new friends now that CeCe is hooking up with her brother from another mother?"

"Time to make yourself look prettier on the outside because there's so much to make up for on the inside?" Ginger smiles so sweetly at her I almost giggle.

"Janelle Ashby," the woman says, extending a hand to me. "You must be new in town; I haven't seen you before."

"Ivy Spencer," I say, wishing I could just teleport back to the ranch away from the last encounter I could ever need today.

"Spencer. Are you the new horse trainer on my husband's ranch?"

"Ex-husband," Ginger corrects.

Janelle ignores Ginger's comment and eyes me up and down, really looks at me, and something in me makes me want to smack her. Maybe it's the mama in me rising up.

"I am the new horse trainer," I say. "It's nice to meet you, can't say I've heard much about you from Wade."

Ginger snorts beside me and raises her hand for another glass of champagne.

"Ivy is helping Wade train a derby horse. She has a real gift, something fresh and totally new for Wade, which is just what he needs in my opinion … in the training department, that is. Wouldn't be surprised if he decides to keep her on the ranch for a long time," Ginger says, a fuck you glimmer in her eyes.

Janelle looks me up and down. I see it on her face as it registers with her, the moment she realizes Wade might just be more than my boss.

"Well, those Ashby men sure have a lot of women hanging off them, don't they? Speaking of, how's Cole, Ginger? Has he finally managed to get through every woman in Kentucky so he can give you that pity fuck you've been begging him for, for years?"

Ginger smiles at her.

"Oh honey, wouldn't you like to know. But I'll never kiss and tell—I'm a lady, unlike some of the trash just hanging around town these days."

Janelle just laughs an evil little laugh at Ginger and leans her head back, closing her eyes before she speaks. "You know, I noticed how good Wade's looking these days, told him as much the other day," she says as she lifts her feet into her own sudsy bath.

Before I can stop it, my blood instantly boils as I ask myself when she saw Wade. He never mentioned it. Then I scold myself for being jealous.

"Well, that ship has sailed—so sad for you. Too bad you didn't notice that when you were still his wife," Ginger quips, not missing a beat.

Janelle opens her eyes and looks at both of us. "Wade's understanding, that man is loyal to a fault. Been really thinking a lot about him lately, you know. We were talking about giving things another go when we were at Woody's the other day for ax throwing."

Wade's day out with Nash and Cole comes to mind, and I wonder just what was said between them. I know Wade was there; I did not know Janelle was.

Ginger laughs this time, a clear laugh.

"Janelle, that would never happen. Wade may be loyal but he isn't stupid. He would never give you another chance."

Janelle leans back in her chair and closes her eyes again, as I ask myself if anything she's saying is true. She sure seems confident when she smiles and singsongs, "Never say never, Gingy."

After Ginger and I leave the nail bar and the world's most awkward pedicure with Wade's dreadful ex-wife, Ginger proceeds to tell me a million times as we eat our lunch at the local hot spot that Janelle is a compulsive liar and a drama queen, and I shouldn't give one word she says a second thought.

The funny thing is, I know that. I know how Wade feels, and if I know one other thing about him it's that he's honest. I know he would never be interested in his ex-wife, but part of me, the part that is the self-preserving side and feels I can only rely on myself, tells me that maybe she can offer him something I can't. Then again, maybe that's just my insecurity talking considering the way I'm going to have to make this fun little relationship we've got going very real, very quickly. Too many thoughts run through my head to comprehend.

So now, I've just been sitting here for the past hour staring at www.baby.com on my phone, in the Sage and Salt parking lot, reading that mine and Wade's baby is about the size of a kidney bean and trying to figure out how to face him. I know I have to go back to the ranch. We're getting Rowan and Angel ready for Florida today, but for some reason every time I go to start the truck, I freeze.

I try to talk myself up, thinking of the advice my dad would give me in this scenario. As I dry my tears and try to straighten myself out, I remember. This man is different from any man I've ever known. This man isn't Brad. If this baby isn't meant to be, I'll make it through this. The question is, do I do it on my own and weather things as they come? Or do I make Wade suffer with me? Or do I just wait a few weeks and see what happens, what my ultrasound says?

One thing I know is certain—I've always only been able to count on one person, myself. To rely on someone else seems terrifying and my head is such a mess right now.

I reach down and run a hand over my still-flat stomach. To the naked eye, nothing is different, but in my heart, I know I'll never be the same.

Let's go, little bean. It's you and me. Let's go home.