29. Dex

29

DEX

On the way to class this morning, I'm feeling on edge because I haven't spoken to Austin in twenty-four hours. I can only assume the date went well. Otherwise, I would've gotten some sarcastic or overdramatic text by now.

Maybe there was even a kiss, or hell, who knows, a handjob. I try not to picture how that might've all gone down, or my stomach is liable to implode. Instead, I should focus my energy on why this is affecting me so much. I suppose I liked the idea of Austin and me only experimenting with each other, though we didn't set any parameters or restrictions around our dates. How could we? It was all in an effort to lead to exactly where it did—a date with a hot guy.

Christ, I need to calm my ass down.

The group project is a good distraction, and when class ends, my thoughts are still revolving around our upcoming presentation. Until I see Austin reading on the bench near the coffee cart.

My heart skips a beat, and for a split second, I consider heading in the opposite direction. But I force my feet forward so I can show Austin what an encouraging friend I can be.

He smiles when I sit beside him. "Hey, you."

"Hey." I wait for him to say something more, but when he doesn't volunteer any info, I ask, "You good?"

"Uh-huh," he replies absently, his eyes still on the page. "Why wouldn't I be?"

Because you had a date last night and I haven't heard from you.

"No reason. Just making sure." I glance toward the coffee cart and notice a newer employee, a girl with blue hair and a nose ring. Not that I know everyone who works at Bean Necessities. "Do you have a shift?"

"Just finished half of one, and there's a lull in customers, so I'm taking a break." He motions toward the girl. "Was training Chelsea, but my replacement is on his way because my manager knows I have plans."

"Plans?"

"I'm meeting my parents for lunch on the pier." His forehead wrinkles. "I thought I told you about it."

"You probably did and I forgot." I puff out a breath. "Tell them hello for me."

"I will." He smiles. "If you didn't have a student government meeting, I'd invite you along."

I blink. "Holy shit, I can't believe I forgot about it."

His smirk is heartening. "I guess it's good we ran into each other."

"Jesus." I lift my wrist to check my watch. "Can you be my future campaign manager?"

"Hell no." He closes his book app. "But I'll certainly organize your TV appearances and print out all your flyers."

I playfully elbow him. "Deal."

I sit there awkwardly, wondering how to bring up the topic of his date. I've never had an issue asking him pointed questions before.

"So…" He bites his lip. "Aren't you gonna ask me how it went?"

Well, there it is.

"How did it go?" I squeak out, but if he thinks my voice sounds strange, he doesn't mention it.

He hitches a shoulder like it's no big thing. "Not well."

Guilt tightens my stomach when I feel relieved. "So…?"

"There was no chemistry." He sniffs self-confidently, and I note how flippant he sounds over a disaster of a date. This is definitely an improvement. "And besides, I apparently talked about you a bit too much."

"Uh-oh." I wince. My pulse is throbbing as I ask, "What made you do that?"

He bites his lip. "It's comfortable talking about my best friend."

My neck prickles. "Still, he probably got the wrong idea."

He frowns. "He did, but I set him straight."

Christ, why do I feel relief and regret all at once?

"And…what happened?"

He sighs dramatically. "We decided to be friends."

"Suppose it could've been worse." I nudge his shoulder. "You could always use more friends."

He rolls his eyes and grows silent. From the way he's fidgeting, I can tell there's something else he wants to say. I wait him out.

"Thing is…" Austin twiddles his thumbs. "I'm pretty sure I need a fourth date. Maybe even a fifth."

I inhale sharply. "Are you serious?" My heart is thumping hard as I try to make sense of why I feel so pleased.

"Well, yeah…look how much I messed up on that date."

"But look how far you've come. You realized there was no chemistry instead of beating yourself up about not being someone's type. You're finally seeing that it's not only one-sided. People have to actually connect, and it needs to be mutual."

"Suppose you're right." Austin glances toward the ocean and stands. Suddenly I want to take back every levelheaded, mature thing I just said and hash it through with him again.

"Gotta head to the Italian place." He averts his eyes. "And it's okay if you don't want to?—"

"I do," I blurt. "I only wanted to point out some of the positive changes I've seen in you."

"Thanks." He toes the grass. "But like I said, I could use more practice."

When our eyes meet, I ask, "What are we doing, Austin?"

"I just told you I need more?—"

"No." I lightly grip his wrist. "I mean, what are we really doing?"

His eyes grow wide and searching. "I don't know, but I don't wanna stop."

The molecules in the air start popping and zinging between us like we're standing on the precipice of a giant cliff and neither of us is willing to take the first plunge. Either out of fear or worry.

Somehow, pretending is easier. And a whole lot more fun.

"I don't wanna stop either. Until one of us decides it's time." Austin's breathing is labored as he listens. "Promise me we'll fight to maintain our friendship because I swear to God, if I fuck it up?—"

"I promise."

When I see Austin's parents walking toward us, I lift my hand in a wave.

"I thought I was meeting you on the pier," Austin says before hugging his parents.

"We decided to take a stroll around campus," Mr. Reid replies. "And just happened upon the two of you."

"I hope this means you're joining us," Mrs. Reid says to me. "We'd love to hear about your school year too."

God, they're great, and right then, I want nothing more than to hang out with them for a couple of hours. "You know what? I will."

"What about your meeting?"

"I'll just show up late." It isn't for another hour, and I've never missed one before. "I can always say that my second set of parents are in town. They'll get it."

"Perfect. We love spending time with our other son."

Mrs. Reid throws her arm around my shoulder, and Austin grins as we follow behind him and his stepdad to the restaurant. This doesn't surpass Austin asking for another date, but spending time with the Reid family fills me with a quiet comfort I didn't realize I was missing.

Once our food arrives, I'm having too much fun to leave for the meeting. I just want to be in this bubble with them and have a good meal. So I scroll to Ian's name in my phone and fire off a quick text, letting him know I can't make it. It's so unlike me, but Austin would be proud since he thinks I burn the candle at both ends.

"How's your mom doing?" Mrs. Reid asks, and I briefly stiffen because it's a loaded question.

"Same old, same old," I say, and Austin shoots me a sympathetic look.

"Is Jodi still enjoying her job?" she asks, and I nod.

"That's important," Mr. Reid adds as he digs into his salad.

"It is." I try not to think about the whole ruined-date-comforting-Mom session, but it's never far from my thoughts.

"It's tough out there," Mrs. Reid says as if reading my thoughts. "Dating isn't all it's cracked up to be—at any age."

"Tell me about it," Austin mutters, and it's the perfect segue from that topic.

"Austin had a date last night." Austin shoots me a scathing look for bringing it up, and I grin even though the whole thing still makes me feel nauseous.

"I almost forgot," Mrs. Reid replies, turning her attention to Austin. "Tell us all about it."

I feel jealous of their relationship—not that Mom isn't supportive of everything I do. But it seems like most of our time is spent talking about her love-life woes, leaving little time to focus on much else.

"It was uneventful," Austin says, avoiding my gaze. "There was no chemistry between us."

Mrs. Reid pats his hand. "Like I said, it's tough out there."

"Dex doesn't seem to have any problems." Austin smirks. "Though he's not really interested in dating."

"Nothing wrong with that." Mr. Reid winks. "Maybe that's the trick. To seem unruffled."

"Have you even met me?" Austin lobs back. "I get all tongue-tied around guys."

"It's actually pretty cute," I say, and his mom smiles. "But yeah, doesn't help you get much traction if you're blushing and stumbling over your words."

"I used to be the same," Mr. Reid says to my utter amazement. He's always seemed so self-assured but in a quieter way. "Then I met your mother, and it all clicked into place."

They share an endearing smile, and Austin rolls his eyes. "Okay, cringe. I can't take all the googly eyes between you two."

I huff out a laugh. "I thought you love romance."

"Not when it's between your parents," he retorts. "I'd rather not imagine what they're up to when I'm not around."

We all laugh. Mrs. Reid blushes, then leans toward me. "Maybe you could give Austin some pointers."

"Yeah, maybe." And suddenly, the bread and butter in the center of the table look mighty interesting to Austin and me.