II Summer

Summer greets them faster than the fleeting spring.

Sol's initial duties have long-since ended, however, he has decided to remain by Yohan's side at the royal manor to aid Elizabeth in the King's treatment.

For the faster His Majesty heals, the quicker Yohan will be relieved of his duties.

In the middle of the cottage, beneath the early morning light, Yohan embraces Sol. The knight's arms shield him from the world. Though Sol finds himself missing life at Featherlaine sometimes, and he hopes Androcles fares well, he has gotten used to this: spending the days and the nights by Yohan's side.

Yet, still, sometimes there are moments in which he remains unaccustomed to their proximity. Whenever Sol does not hear Yohan coming into a room he still finds himself jolting as he tenses, his heart a wardrum in his ribcage.

Days ago, when Yohan had just returned from his duties, Sol should have heard him entering as he'd wrung open the door—Yohan was far from quiet—but Sol was engrossed in a book that night. And when his beloved came to gently hold his hand as he so often tended to do, at Sol's request, even… the knight surprised Sol without meaning to, the mere act of suddenly being touched without warning found Sol screaming, then in tears.

They agreed then, that Yohan would always announce himself from now on. But it was a hard lesson to learn, that even when his mind knows it is fine, that he is safe , his body remembers the ways in which Sol was betrayed—it will not let him forget with ease. If it weren't for Yohan's gentle reassurance on the worst of days, Sol would have continued to believe part of him was broken—however his beloved always finds a way to show him he is more than his past.

And lately, Sol has started to believe that.

Because no matter how many storms they brace together, in the end, there is always light.

There is always love.

And, today, is a good day. Sol had a dream where he and Yohan returned home. It had been a few months, and the teahouse was open, and they were thriving.

He awakens. The room is pale blue and violet when he blinks then rolls over to find Yohan laying there, rousing from his slumber as he smiles at Sol. "Sleep well?" he asks.

And Sol reaches for his hand that he brings to his lips; Yohan's grin is contagious. "Always, when I'm beside you."

Yohan's thumb finds his lower lip that he traces softly with a hum. He leans forward to kiss Sol's forehead. "It is the same for me."

The low, rumble in his voice stirs a certain warmth inside Sol, who shuffles closer to his beloved, the weight of his palm now rested against Yohan's waist. "Sol, my love,"

Yohan pulls him in closer; it is such a comfortable, peaceful morning. The air is still, all except for the knight's breaths which fall, heavy and hot against Sol's neck. "What do you want to do?"

"I want to be close to you,"

Sol mumbles as he buries his face in the crook of Yohan's shoulder, the knight chuckles.

"How close?"

A relaxed groan leaves Sol's lips. He chuckles, then guides Yohan's big, warm hand to his stomach, until the knight's fingers slip beneath his own tunic.

" Oh. "

Yohan runs his fingers up Sol's spine, and Sol can hear him smiling. "I see."

Sol's breaths quicken then grow heavy at the touch, his knees tremble with desire. And Yohan kisses his temple. He deepens their embrace, still. "Are you certain, my heart?"

" Yes. "

Sol's skin burns with desire. As he holds onto Yohan, he clutches at the chemise covering his knight's back, then whispers, "I want to be touched."

A chuckle leaves his beloved's lips, "Then I shall touch you, darling."

Yohan briefly pushes up against his own elbow to close the gingham curtains above their heads, only but a streak of rising golden light remains, splitting the room in a bright line of warmth.

When Sol's eyes catch onto Yohan's hip that peeks out from beneath his night clothes, Sol presses his lips there, he runs his teeth across pale skin, grazing the knight's hipbone with a chuckle. He knows they could stay under the covers to do this, but the air is already hot as the sun begins to settle in the sky, and considering what they are about to do… Sol holds no doubt the temperature is about to rise again.

He shuffles closer to the bed's edgeside, and sits. Yohan raises a brow at him for a moment, though, he soon follows suit—the knight kneels between Sol's legs, he tips his head, until his cheek rests against Sol's thigh. "Yohan,"

Sol echoes again as he observes the knight through lidded eyes, he runs his fingers through Yohan's hair. "Can I keep my tunic on?"

Yohan nods. "Of course, my love."

He shows Sol a gentle smile. "Sol, I love you."

Sol peers down at him, his eyelashes fluttering, he rests a hand against his knight's shoulder then leans down to kiss him. "Love you, too…"

As Yohan rests a hand against Sol's cheek and cradles it gently, he asks Sol through heavy breaths, "Can I sit behind you, sweetheart?"

Sol thinks for a moment. Eventually, he says, "Only if I can see you,"

his voice is soft and lowered, spreading thin amid sounds of the early morning, that slip in through the room from the outside world.

Yohan turns his head to glimpse at the tall, oval mirror held up by an aging, wooden frame posed right where the mattress ends. "Would that work?"

he asks Sol.

Outside the cottage, the sun rises higher in the sky, glowing amber slashes split the room in two as the daylight glows brighter. Sol purses his lips together—never in his lifetime would he have thought himself the type to consider such an offer. Yet, here he is, filled with a newfound confidence that makes him want to sink into sweet decadence with his beloved. Sol's mouth shapes into the word, "Okay."

And then, he dips his weight forward, until he is hugging Yohan's back, holding him close. "But I want you someplace different,"

Sol whispers into the knight's ear, and Yohan's finger twitches against his thigh. "I want, to be taken by you from behind…"

Sol can feel the knight's breathing quickening against his chest. "Sol,"

Sol's name is but a gasp on Yohan's lips as his curve into a smile.

"Yes, Yohan?"

Yohan leans in to hold him, then hugs him back. "I'm merely…worried about hurting you. And we ran out of oil last month…"

"Oh. I…"

A pink, bashful burn slips into Sol's cheeks. "I have…"

He nuzzles his nose into Yohan's shoulder, his words melting into a mumbled mess. "I have everything we need."

Becoming an apothecary has its surprising perks in times like these—knowing they wouldn't return to the city anytime soon, Sol took it upon himself to craft his own oils for the occasion, in case they'd ever have need for them again.

Though… he didn't think that need would come so quickly.

There is another moment of silence between them, in which Sol hears Yohan swallow, hard. "I see."

Sol can practically hear the tension in the knight's jaw. "Then, let us try."

Sol points Yohan toward his bedside drawer, where the oils remain in the same place he left them, when he first tried them alone amid a solitary crepuscule; Yohan was not home for the week, and the scent of him in Sol's bed had become too much for Sol to bear without his beloved around. He'd pleasured himself inside their unwashed sheets, wished it had been the knight's fingers circling the perk of his manhood, instead of his own. "Don't worry,"

Sol tells Yohan as the knight eyes the small vial with a certain wariness in his eyes. "It's only coconut oil mixed with… a few other things that might help."

"And you've tried it before, yes?"

the knight asks as he smears a bit on the tips of his fingers and gives it a whiff.

"Yohan, I—"

Sol sighs as he stares at his lover again and groans. "I made it myself…"

Yohan's lower lip twitches. "Ah."

He pauses, before he adds, "That's very resourceful of you, my love."

"T-Thanks…"

Sol clears his throat as he averts his gaze. "Do you need any help?"

Help with what? Sol thinks as he curses himself for blurting the words just to fill the silence between them. Yohan clearly knows how lubricant works.

"Thank you, but"—Yohan rubs his fingers together, then stares down at them as he tests the oil, he smiles at Sol—"I think I will be all right."

Cordial as always , Sol thinks, whilst he internally thanks Yohan for not making this more awkward than it needed to be.

Soon, Yohan returns to kneel between Sol's legs. Sol loves the sight of him like this— attentive, subservient, his.

"May I?"

Yohan asks, before he gently tugs on the waistband of Sol's breeches.

And Sol lets him. " Please. "

His breaths shake when Yohan dips his head forward, until his lips have disappeared between Sol's thighs. Yohan suckles on his cock. He makes Sol whimper and beg and thread his fingers through his hair. "Yohan."

Yohan kisses up then down Sol's wet heat, he drags his tongue, softly, across Sol's pussy. And Sol lifts his knees then wraps his legs around Yohan's shoulders. He is soaked, wet and aching as Yohan sucks on him again. " Yohan. "

Sol can feel that he is close to the sun, to deliverance, and Yohan grunts, his voice low and wild as he sucks Sol to completion.

" A-Ah! "

Sol comes with his thighs trembling around Yohan's head—even in his climax, the knight wraps his arms around Sol's waist and holds him as close as they can be.

When it is over, and Yohan pulls away, Sol looks to him—dazed—when Yohan rises to take a seat behind Sol's back again. Sol is breathless. Still, he arches into him, his spine aligning with the knight's chest that rises and falls with arousal, too. Their body heat and desires melt together into warmth. Sol reaches behind himself to grasp Yohan's hand that he squeezes, softly.

Yohan kisses the back of his neck. "I'll be gentle,"

he whispers. And Sol believes him. Always.

As Yohan slips his palms underneath the curve of Sol's backside, he pours oil onto his fingers. The knight massages wet, hot circles into Sol's ass. " Sol, "

he kisses Sol's ear with a throaty growl, "I can't wait to have you, my love."

Sol's mind sinks into endless pleasure as Yohan's fingers sink into him. "Oh, Gods , that's good. "

Sol whimpers, then tilts his head on instinct, catches a brief glimpse of himself and the knight in the mirror—Sol's lips quiver, his face is flushed deep rose tones that match the color of his swollen cunt. Yohan is opening him up, fucking him like he has always want to be fucked, and Sol relishes in every second of it.

This love.

The divine.

Yohan's mouth finds its way beside Sol's ear, and Sol feels the warmth of a low chuckle brush his skin. "My darling, you are so tense, here ."

And Sol bites into his lower lip. "Relax."

He does his best to relax around the spread of his beloved's fingers, sliding into his heat. "My love,"

Yohan leaves kisses down Sol's neck. He runs his lips across Sol's shoulder. " Breathe. " And Sol breathes. He throws his head back, against Yohan's shoulder as he grips at the knight's arms. He relinquishes control. All of it for a single, brief second. And, Gods, how silent it is in his mind for once.

How good it feels to trust.

" O-Oh— "

It is embarrassing to hear himself moan like this, but Sol cannot hold the sound back. The way Yohan takes him, teases his entrance before fucking into him again, Sol wants to be touched, he wants Yohan to circle around his cock again, he wants Yohan. Yohan. Yohan.

"Yohan,"

he whines, "take me—put it in, please. "

Upon hearing Sol's mumbled request, Yohan hums. His tone is playful. "Ah?"

Yohan presses his lips to the back of Sol's head again. With his free hand, he unbuckles his own belt, and lets his cock spring free between Sol's ass. "But will I fit?"

Sol stares downward before he gulps at the sight of Yohan's cock. His beloved is… big, and his size is even more evident when Yohan is pressed to Sol's pussy. Yohan twitches against him, and Sol finds himself grinding down softly against the tip of his beloved's cock. "F-Fuck—"

Sol bites his lip, his eyes roll to the back of his head. "Want you—"

he gasps as the warmth of Yohan's come spreading across his pussy grants him sweet, temporary relief. "I want you, Yohan."

"Patience, Sol."

Yohan's gaze is gentle, mellow in the mirror's reflection as he stares right into Sol's eyes. "You can hold on for me, right, sweetheart?"

Yohan whispers before he pushes a third digit into Sol's ass—he nibbles on Sol's ear, and Sol thrusts his hips forward on instinct as he shuts his eyes. "Just a little longer,"

Yohan hushes him. "I want to be gentle with you." And Sol whines and clenches around his fingers, when the knight runs his free hand past Sol's chemise then up Sol's back, Sol shivers.

He hiccups a moan. "O-Okay, I'll t-try—"

And he feels Yohan smile against him.

"That's my man,"

the knight chuckles, he peppers kisses down Sol's neck. "You're doing so well, Sol. "

Yohan scissors his fingers inside him. "Can you feel how loose you're becoming around me, my love?"

He sucks on Sol's skin. "I'm certain you'll feel divine."

Tears of pleasure blur Sol's vision. "Y-You're talkative today…"

he mumbles, as he bites down on a hiss once Yohan continues to move. "Oh, Gods…"

"Am I?"

Yohan chuckles. "Well,"

he sighs into Sol's skin, "I thought it may be helpful."

"H-Helpful?"

Sol's eyes flutter open, when Yohan's fingers leave him.

"Yes,"

Yohan urges Sol to look at him from over his shoulder, he kisses Sol, long, lovely and slow. "You wanted to see me…I assumed hearing it is me could be of some reassurance."

Yohan brushes the hair out of Sol's gaze with his free hand. "My heart,"

he asks, "was I wrong to assume?"

"No, I—"

Sol's breaths hitch when he accidentally shifts against Yohan's cock. "I…like it, hearing your voice."

His words find Yohan grinning. The knight's lips brush against Sol's cheek in a soft peck. "In that case, I won't ever stop talking,"

Yohan jests as he laughs then kisses Sol's lips now. And never will Sol get enough of the way his beloved's mouth moves against his, it so good, so holy, so right.

"My heart?"

Yohan presses a soft kiss to Sol's eyelid before he pauses. "Shall I fuck you now?"

he asks, and Sol doesn't know how his beloved can sound so level-headed whilst speaking such words, but the offer goes straight to his cunt as Sol clenches around the air, he groans with impatience, excitement.

A soft, small laugh slips past his lips. Sol leans back against the knight and tilts his head until it rests against his shoulder. He lowers his voice to a whisper. He grins. "Fuck me, Yohan."

There is an audible weight to Yohan's breaths as Sol's words fall amid the silence. Yohan reaches around to cup the underside of Sol's knees— and Sol cannot help but notice, how careful the knight is being to avoid his thighs, his heart is grateful for his consideration.

Yohan lifts Sol slightly, and Sol leans back, against the knight's chest. He gulps, then takes a deep breath. Soon, Yohan is rocking his hips forward, softly burying himself inside Sol's warmth.

The heat of his beloved's cock spreading slowly inside him has Sol whimpering—there is a burn, but no pain. The feel of having him here is an overwhelming tightness, like nothing Sol has ever felt before. And even after all the time the knight spent preparing him, Sol is barely able to take most of his cock. He understands now, why Yohan urged him to wait a little longer. "Oh—"

Sol's pupils widen as his tears line his eyes, he stares up to the ceiling, his lips agape. " Oh, f-fuck—"

Sol almost chokes on the word. "So big—"

Yohan brushes the sweat-soaked hair back from Sol's forehead."

What are you talking about, darling?"

he mouths the words beside Sol's temple and kisses him there with a chuckle. "I haven't changed at all since last time."

"It feels different though,"

Sol's words are slightly slurred as he averts his gaze and buries his face into the crook of Yohan's arm. "Go slow,"

he mumbles against the knight's skin. "Please…"

"Of course, my heart,"

the low, rumble of Yohan's voice reverberates against Sol's neck. The knight eases himself into him gently, slowly, until he is fully sheathed inside Sol's heat.

And Sol's eyes roll to the back of his head. "Oh, Gods ."

He bites into his lower lip then moans, rocking back on instinct against Yohan's cock. They have barely begun, and yet, he is already seeing stars. "Yohan. Yohan. Yohan, I— "

Yohan's breaths are hot as they fall atop his skin. "My love, is it too much?"

Sol shakes his head. He wants to talk, but right now, this is all he can muster—he is too busy sinking into the feeling of Yohan's cock, Yohan's chest arched around his spine like a large shield, his arms wrapped around Sol's—

"Ah."

Yohan's grin seeps into a soft, gentle hum. "Then, does it feel good for you, dearest?"

he lowers his voice, and then, his hand hikes up the back of Sol's tunic once more. "Would you like me to move? Tell me,"

Yohan kisses Sol's cheek, "my handsome, darling man."

Sol's face is hot at the compliment; though they are not facing each other, he feels the need to avert his gaze. "I love you,"

he tells Yohan in a mumble, and then, "Y-You can move, n-no need to wait…"

The knight hums as he tucks Sol's hair behind his ear, then kisses the crown of his head. "All right, my sweet,"

he whispers, "I love you, too."

He thrusts, once—and Sol's breaths catch in his throat. The hot drag of Yohan's cock inside him finds Sol whimpering. Sol's mouth parts, a trickle of saliva slips down his lip. " F-Fuck— "

"My love,"

Yohan's heated breaths caress Sol's nape. "Breathe."

As Sol hiccups another whimper, he grabs hold of Yohan's hands then hisses the words, "More. Please. "

And Yohan can only oblige. He buries himself, deeper in Sol's warmth. He cups the underside of Sol's chin and guides Sol's attention towards the mirror again— towards them.

"Do you want to look, Sol?"

Yohan mutters and Sol's gaze returns to the mirror, he watches the knight's cock slipping inside his ass, easy and slow. "Look at how gorgeous you are, my heart,"

he speaks the words hushed like a prayer. "You deserve everything, too."

Oh, Sol thinks while his chest warms with a gentle heat—echoes of the words he'd whispered when he'd made love to Yohan flitter through his mind, Yohan remembered.

As he finds the courage to look properly, he cannot take his eyes off the mirror. Off himself—because for once, he does not loathe his body, it is a vessel for love and loving. And, Gods, how he wants to cling to the feeling.

Yohan's warm palm comes to rest beneath Sol's neck, atop his heart. In this moment, Sol is overwhelmed with an undeniable truth, a feeling that perhaps, he and Yohan do deserve this.

Perhaps, it is okay for them to want again.

Perhaps, they can be more than their past.

"S-So hot…"

Sol mumbles, to Yohan, and to himself.

The knight kisses his temple as he continues to fuck into him. "You, too, my my heart,"

he whispers. "I am in love with you, so deeply, I swear. "

He holds Sol closer to his chest, and Sol's head falls back as he hiccups with pleasure; the knight's low voice reverberates against his skin. "With your body, your soul— you are perfection, Sol. "

Sol's eyes falter to himself again. How wonderful it is, he thinks as he smiles, to get to know one's self again in the safety of Yohan's arms. His attention drifts to Yohan, who is looking at him, with adoration in his gaze. He smiles. "I love you, too."

Despite most of his figure remaining unchanged, no traces of Solange remain in the reflection that stares back at him, there is only Sol—a young man rebuilt out of the ashes of a life he'd always felt numb to. Yohan's hand hikes up his tunic and finds Sol's bare heart that beats into his palm, the knight presses his lips to Sol's nape. Tears line Sol's eyes as he trembles and grinds his hips down against his beloved's cock. He wants this—has never wanted so much in his life—to hold on to this odd, flittering hope at happiness that has filled his soul like Yohan's cock fills his body with a soft, loving worship.

Rebirth, Sol thinks as his gaze meets with the ceiling that glows orange with sunlit rays.

That's what this feels like.

"Sol…"

Yohan whispers. "You're shaking, my love."

"I-I merely—"

Sol sniffles, before he quickly wipes the tears that blur his vision away. "This is…"

He takes a deep breath, then places his hand over Yohan's knuckles. "All my life, I felt as though—no matter what I did—I would never be enough,"

Sol peers back into himself, at his reflection being held, being loved by Yohan. He doesn't mean to sound so choked up when he speaks, yet he cannot help it. "But you make me feel like I am enough, Yohan."

Sol squeezes at Yohan's hand, he smiles as another tear of joy streams down his jaw. "Thank you."

I finally feel like I am myself.

Like I am a person, and I'll be okay.

"I'm glad, Sol."

Yohan's grin is warm as he wraps the brave strength of his arms around Sol and kisses the fabric over his shoulder, then brings Sol's knuckles to his lips—their gazes meet in the mirror. "You'll always be enough for me."

The ends of Sol's lip jerk upward as his brows arch. He lifts himself up, all trembling legs and heavy breaths again, as Yohan's cock slips out of him; Sol turns to embrace Yohan, his arms wound tightly around the knight's shoulders, he buries his face into his beloved's shoulder, then asks him, "Can we finish like this?"

Yohan's hand finds his spine once more. " Yes. "

There is a fondness in his tone. " My darling. "

His cock nudges Sol's ass until Sol is pulling him in again, clenching around the slick, wet edge of his manhood.

And, Gods , how Sol yearns to revel in this bliss a little while longer, he feels as though he is floating, how divine would it be to stay here forever, like this; Yohan runs nimble fingers up Sol's skin, he rubs his back before he fucks into Sol's tightening heat, the act draws another moan, a whimper from Sol's lips.

And Sol tenses—his hands grasp at the space above Yohan's deltoids. His eyes widen, he heaves in a breath, then chokes around Yohan's name. " O-Oh— fuck, I—"

The sweet emptiness of rapture, of being undone, eclipses Sol's mind until only Yohan's deep, generous thrusts pushing into his ass is all he knows for a soft, finite moment.

A strip of golden sunlight moves, it touches Sol's dark hair with pumpkin warmth. The air smells of sweat and pine, and the soaps they used last night in the cottage's shower. Yohan does not let go of him—not when he is spilling inside Sol's tight heat with his come, nor when he is grunting his name, as he thrusts and thrusts and thrusts into him—not even does he relinquish their embrace when Sol tells him he loves him again and the knight says it back.

Yohan grinds his hips in a way that quickens his pace, and with every thrust Sol is lost to the pleasure of his climax, to his knight's strength as he whimpers and moans, his eyes lidded, lined with tears. Sol stares up at the ceiling. The heat of the outside world touches him gently. A sole tear streams down to his cheek again. Amid the little cottage, beneath Yohan's strong, brave chest Sol feels connected to the world, the universe and its magic. There is a feeling inside his heart, thumping, that tells him he is safe.

Everything has led him to this , Sol realizes as he blinks; all the pain, the suffering, the long nights spent wondering what this life would ever amount to… They made Sol find himself. And Yohan. And for this, he is grateful.

Sol feels surrounded by an immense love—by every living being that ever came before and will come to pass after him. This feeling, this light, was always inside him—but it took the darkest of nights to wield it. And now, the sun has finally risen again.

Outside, the birds chirp songs of midsummer; Sol holds his beloved closer to his chest. "Thank you, Yohan,"

he whispers.

Thank you, for loving me.