5. Jude

My heavy eyelids slowly open, sleep threatening to take me but I'm just not ready to give in. All of this is too new, too fragile, and I'm afraid to let go even if it is just to dream of them. Lena's finally asleep and the little one is squirming. I don't want him to wake her. She's been fussing over him and trying to get him to latch on to feed for hours before she finally dozed off. The little witch has left. Everyone is content that both Lena and the pup are healthy and well. Lena herself is already healing although a touch slower than wolves do. She needs to eat and to sleep, witch's orders.

Grace and Lizzie left first, shooed out by the witch hours ago. Lena thanked them all, although she hasn't said much to me. A whispered "thank you" when I readjust her pillow. A gentle "no thank you" when I've asked if there's anything I can do.

I don't know my place, other than beside her, waiting and ready for whatever is to come. I've watched the color return to her cheeks, her wounds heal, and sleep slowly restores her strength. And I keep waiting, hoping, that she'll feel the pull. I keep imagining the spark that will come to her eyes when I look down at her. But all it is at this point is a dream that keeps me from being able to rest.

With Lena soundly sleeping and the little one wriggling, I pick up her little boy with both hands, although I could probably carry him steadily with just one. He's so tiny. He opens his mouth to squeal, but I slip the tip of my pointer down his nose and across his upper lip and he latches right on. Just like he did with Lena. A small smile curls my lips up as I set him down on the makeshift cushion on my dresser.

Just yesterday morning, life was completely different. I never could have imagined this would be my life so soon.

I keep my left hand on his squirmy little body and grab the tiny-ass diaper and wipes with my right. Someone's bound to drop this squirmy little guy, but I'll be damned if it's going to be me. I chuckle to myself as I wipe his bottom, put the clean diaper on, and bundle him up like the little witch showed me. It doesn't look right, but he'll be fine. I sit with him in the rocker that Grace brought in earlier and stare down at the little guy; he's wriggling a bit as I try to rock him to sleep. I'll have to wake Lena if he gets any fussier since he might be hungry.

The very thought of doing that makes me nervous. She needs her rest and I don't want to wake her. I don't want to fail her at such a delicate time.

I've already done that tonight based on her little cries and short-lived sobs. I had to ask her what was wrong and in return she merely shook her head and refused to look at me. She's not well and I can't even hear her, I can't soothe her as a mate should.

I don't understand how Lizzie bonded with her before I did. How could she hear my mate when I hear nothing?

The thought eats at me in the night. As I stare down at her child though, our child, I'm reminded of how grateful I am that he waited to make an appearance until I got them here safely. My heart drops and my eyes travel along his face. I keep remembering that he's not mine. And it fucking kills me each time the thought comes to me. I look between Lena and her son. Her eyes are almond shaped with dark thick lashes, her lips are thin, but the bottom lip is lush. Her cheeks high and jaw narrow. He looks nothing like her. He looks just like Shadow. My jaw ticks and my fists clench. I fucking hate it. I have no right to claim this child as my own, but I'm damn well going to do it.

Shadow's a dead man. That's all he is. He's no father. He had no right to claim my mate. This child is mine. Just like Lena is mine. A low growl grows in my throat but stops as I see Lena's body hunch forward in her sleep. I gently trail my fingers down her jaw and down farther to her neck. She's so beautiful. My eyes linger on the silver scar on her skin as I settle the baby and put him down. I'm going to fucking destroy that scar. I can't wait to ruin it with my own bite. At least three bites. And then I get the other side of her neck all to myself. The scars will be faint, but I want my bite to be clear and obvious to everyone. I don't want it mixed with his wrongful claim to her.

Sighing heavily, I run my hands through my buzzed hair and down my face. Shock and disbelief from all that happened has deprived me of sleep. Just last week I was mateless and without a care in the world. A smile widens across my face. Now I have a family. How the fuck did I get so damn lucky? My smile dims as I watch Lena turn in her sleep. She doesn't even know she's my mate. I'll tell her. It fucking hurts that I have to tell her because she feels nothing between us.

None of this should have happened this way. I don't know how she came to be Shadow's, but I'll slowly torture him if his claim has broken my mate's ability to feel our bond.

I always imagined my mate would feel this spark and pull, and I still have hope that in the morning she may feel the pull. With one last look at her beautiful form, her chest rising and falling with easy breaths, I quietly make my way to the door. The floorboard barely creaks and I pause, looking back and holding my breath before moving forward once again.

If I'm useful to her, surely she'll accept me even if she doesn't feel it. Nervousness creeps down the back of my neck along with the fear that is very real: she could deny me. After what she's been through, I could very well see that happening, and it didn't escape me when my pack brought up the possibility among themselves while I drove home in silence with her. Nothing like this has ever happened and I don't know what to expect.

Swallowing thickly, I make my way to the kitchen, ignoring every thought in the back of my mind. I'll grab her something to eat before I wake her. She's got to be hungry. She had a quick shower while I changed the sheets, but other than that she hasn't done anything but hold her son.

My bare feet smack on the tiled floor as I enter the kitchen with hollow hope. I shouldn't be surprised that I'm not the only one here. Lizzie and Grace pop their heads up from their bowls of cereal and smile brightly at me. Still in their pajamas, they've had little sleep if the bags under their eyes are anything to go by. A low chuckle escapes me.

"Morning."

"How are they doing?" I hear Lizzie's question as I open the door to the fridge. It soothes nearly every worry knowing how welcomed my mate is. They love her already and I fucking love them even more for it.

I grab the bottle of orange juice, not bothering with a glass, and take a few gulps before setting it on the counter to take it to Lena before answering, "They're doing good. They're both sleeping," I turn to peek at them. "So that's good right?" They both stand and gather around the island with dreamy eyes.

Grace nods her head. "Sleep is good." She glances at Lizzie before adding, "We have so much to do."

"We're going to throw Lena a baby shower!" Lizzie squeals.

"I know it's late, but she still deserves one. And then of course we have to set up the nursery. Unless she plans on keeping him in her room for a while. Well I guess either way we'll have to set it up." Grace continues rambling while I dig through the fridge for some fresh fruit and grab two cups of yogurt for her niece and nephew. I pause after closing the door. My niece and nephew.

Without hesitation I turn to them to ask, "Are the kids awake yet?"

"Not yet." It's odd the relief I feel knowing the two of them are keeping an eye on the little ones. "They need a shower bad. We have their rooms to set up, too."

Lizzie lets a hand fall to her tummy and my eyes follow the movement. I take in her scent without intention and raise my brows in surprise. I can already smell her pregnancy. More shock hits me. It's very early on, but the scent is strong. I don't think she even knows.

I wonder which one of her mates got her pregnant. Suppressing a laugh, I keep the next thought to myself: I don't want to be around when they find out. I scent the air again, but Grace isn't scenting any differently. It's early yet, so I just leave it be.

Clearing my throat, I go back to my task and listen to Grace rattle on. "Whatever you two think," I tell them and make it obvious that I am not staying to chat. I don't think I have much to offer in terms of décor and showers.

"You think we could make the living room into a playroom?" Grace spins on her heels as they continue to talk about adding onto the house and redecorating. I watch them walk out of the kitchen waving their hands in the air as they debate the merits of the color yellow for the playroom since it's a "happy" color.

Taking in the quick breakfast I nod, somewhat satisfied. I've got a couple hard-boiled eggs, an apple, yogurt, and orange juice. I don't know if she'll like any of it, but at least it's something. Before I can leave though, I find myself with company again. This time it's Devin.

I know it's him without having to look up. His footsteps are heavy and even. "We have to leave soon. We need to take care of Shadow's pack before they come for us or, more likely, before they run." His voice is low; he speaks with his eyes watching the doorway, making sure the women are out of hearing range.

I tap the bottle against the countertop. He's already dressed in black jeans and a black, long sleeved Henley. He's ready to act. Knowing my Alpha, he's been on edge and waiting since the moment I first told him.

He murmurs the question quietly and with caution, "Does she know?"

"No." I'm sure she's figured out that I'm going to kill Shadow and his pack. I don't think she'll object, but I'm not going to give her the chance. I don't like the thought of making her upset, but this is a done deal. He will never touch her again and the only way to ensure that is put him six feet in the ground.

"We need to speak to Alec first." My eyes widen in shock as they lock with his.

"You want their permission?" My tone is incredulous, and I know better than to speak to my Alpha like that, but he can't be serious. We don't ask for permission from the Authority. We never have and there's no need to now. This has nothing to do with interspecies relations. No one's going to miss these fuckers when we take them out.

"Not permission. No." Devin sits on the barstool, leans back, and crosses his arms. "Do you remember when we confronted Shadow's pack before?"

I nod. "Of course." Shadow's pack used to have claim to Shadow Falls, until Devin came back to fight for the territory. It should've been his all along.

"And you said there were women there? Just like last time. Unwell." As I nod, I realize what he's getting at, and I attempt to remedy his concern.

"We'll leave them there. Someone else can deal with them." My words are hard and I don't have any sympathy for them. Not after watching them do nothing for those pups, for my niece and nephew. Devin nods his head, taking me by surprise.

"We will. And the Authority will be prepared to deal with it."

The hint of a smile from Devin meant to ease my worries works. A slow smirk pulls my lip up.

"Got it. So a quick stop at the Authority and then we can get this over with." A numbing cold shoots through me. As hungry as I am for revenge, I want this to be over with. I've hardly had any time with my mate. And she still has no idea what she means to me.

"Good. We leave now."

"But Lena?—"

"She will be taken care of."

My lips part in protest but Devin adds, "It is probably best she has time to heal, and possibly that will help with … your bonding."

I stop short, uncertain. "We're ready to go now, Jude," Devin tells me. "Grace already knows. She'll care for Lena and when we're home, after what must be done, the two of you will have a better chance."

I swallow the lump in my throat and pray that he's right.

I like Alec enough,he's all right, but I don't fucking trust him.

I don't really trust anyone for that matter, except my pack. And I don't know Alec enough to trust him or his word. He's had Devin's back on more than one occasion, so that gives him an edge over most people, but I still find myself uncomfortable in his office. I readjust in the seat, and it squeaks under my weight.

The practically ancient office sits upstairs in the Authority's estate and there's only one door. Which means only one way out. Clearing my throat, I stand from the leather upholstered seat to look out of the antique paned windows overlooking the grounds as we wait for Alec. Our estate is beautiful and refined. It's modern, built with every upgrade Devin could get, simply because he could. The Authority's property is ours on steroids with an antique touch.

There are a handful of witches testing their powers in the gardens below us. Hydrangea and rose bushes, I think, and maybe some other kind of flower, are lined perfectly in rows outlining a simple, rectangular fountain that's at least twenty feet long. A young witch keeps sputtering a blue light from her hands and hurling it into the still water. My hand grips a bit tighter on the edge of the sill. It does nothing; her shoulders sag with disappointment. I can't imagine what she's trying to do. I tilt my head as I continue to watch two witches talk animatedly even as I hear the door open.

Alec.

The knowledge of his presence makes me uneasy. Simply because the only exit is the one closest to him. He may be a member of the Authority, but he is not a member of our pack. I glance down to the ground from the window, we're stories up, but I could manage the drop if I had to. I trust Devin, but I still don't know Alec. Shit, even when you know people, they can turn their backs on you.

"I'm sorry to keep you waiting Devin," Alec starts before seeing me. "Ah. Jude. My apologies to you as well." I only nod in acknowledgment and stay by the window. Alec unbuttons his blazer and takes a heavy seat at the head of his desk. He runs a hand down his face in exasperation and I'm taken aback. I've never seen the sorcerer anything but calm and put together.

He's professional and if I'm honest, I've always thought of him to be stiff and lacking emotion. This is nothing like that.

Devin sits easily in one of the two seats across from him and is completely relaxed. I watch my Alpha carefully, but there are no signs of danger. He's at ease and I wish I could say the same. With my Alpha unguarded, my wolf raises his hackles. He's constantly on guard and untrusting. I take a seat on the edge of the chair and lean forward with my elbows on my knees. I just want to get this over with. I have a mate and a pup to return to. They were still sleeping when I left, and I didn't dare to wake them. Grace and Lizzie are listening for them. Thank God for those two. Veronica and Vince should be back to the estate soon and then Dom, Caleb and Lev will join us for the attack. My fists clench and I crack my knuckles.

"Long day?" Devin questions.

"You have no idea. Please tell me I don't need to torture or kill any other members of the Authority."

Devin chuckles and I find myself smirking along with him. "Not that I know of. We just wanted to give you a little heads up."

Alec's brow cocks as he sighs. "What are you going to do this time Devin?" This time I chuckle along with Devin.

"We have to retaliate. We're going today to take down Shadow's pack."

"Take down?" Alec finally straightens in his seat.

Devin cracks his neck before answering. "We're going to kill Shadow, that's long overdue. Anyone who surrenders we plan to leave behind."

Alec nods his head slowly while resting his elbows on the desk, clasps his hands, and his thumbs rub back and forth against one another before his eyes find Devin's. "How many do you think?" Devin doesn't answer, he simply looks at me expectantly.

"There were four women, including Shadow's mate. I doubt they'll fight." Alec nods his head again. "They were not in their right minds, high from the looks of it, the entire time I was there."

"We don't want any backlash from the Authority." Devin's words come out harder than I expect.

"No need to worry. I can't imagine anyone would object. As you said, it's long overdue." Devin nods his head and starts to respond, but a knock at the door stops him.

Just as Alec lifts his head to answer the knock, the door parts and a small blonde human walks in. Curiosity causes me to glance between her and Alec. She holds onto her fingertips and nervously pinches them as she walks with uncertainty toward Alec. Her eyes don't roam the room; she doesn't bother with us at all. Alec clears his throat and looks pointedly at us, as if alerting her of our presence. She stops a foot away from the desk and parts her lips before looking over her shoulder at us. Her mouth closes and her eyes linger on the floor.

"Bella?" At Alec's soft call, her eyes raise to his and glimmer with hope. A small smile makes her cheeks rise, but it holds a hint of sadness.

"I—" She stutters and watches her fingers as she nervously plays with them again. Finally, her shoulders square and she meets Alec's gaze. "I was wondering if you'd like any tea."

"I'm fine. Thank you. Devin? Jude?" Alec doesn't look at us as he asks. Concern is written on his face as he continues to stare at the beautiful woman. There's obviously something there, but it's a delicate matter. I shake my head and keep my nose out of it. That's none of my fucking business.

Devin rests his left elbow on the arm of his chair and leans so he can take his chin in his hand and watch the scene while shaking his head at Alec's offer. "No, thank you."

Bella, as Alec called her, nods slightly before turning to face us for the first time. Her eyes catch sight of me, and she instantly brightens, as though whatever was plaguing her has vanished. "You're Jude!" Goosebumps flow down my arms and I still at her words. Who the hell is she? I scent the air again and confirm that she's human. As I glance at Devin, whose expression indicates he's unaware of who she is as well, she asks me, "How's your mate? She will do great things for your pack."

"What kind of things?" Devin asks as I stare down the cute, little blonde. She has an innocence about her that's undeniable. But she also radiates happiness with her bright brown eyes and wide smile. Her teeth are perfect, and her pale skin only adds to her beauty.

"Not your pack…Jude's pack." The crease on my forehead deepens at her words. She's confused. Or delusional.

"Devin is the Alpha of my pack." I speak clearly and confidently. I have no desire to challenge him, and I don't want there to be any question about that.

"Oh, you haven't seen your brothers yet, have you?" She tilts her head while speaking to me as though she pities me. There's an otherworldly absence to her in this moment. Something that gives me chills. I don't need her pity, but what the fuck does she know about my brothers? My heart beats chaotically, remembering what the seers told my father long ago. The seers envisioned one of us, either myself or my brothers, killing our father. Hearing this little woman talk about his pack as if it's my own, it churns a sickness in my stomach.

But I shut that shit down; seers are liars.

Before I have a chance to ask, she answers my question, "Don't worry, they're fine. Well, they have their hands full with their mate at the moment." She turns toward Alec and smiles.

"Their mate?" I can't help but question. "One mate…for both of them?"

The little blonde practically rolls her eyes. "They're not very good at sharing, but I guess they're trying." The knowledge that my brothers are mated forces a smile from me. Emotions swarm but I remain calm on the exterior. My brothers have a mate. And now so do I. My throat dries a bit too quickly and I clear it once again.

It's been years since I've seen them, but to know they're doing well fills my chest with pride and happiness. Occasionally we speak, but it's been a long time since any of us has reached out to one another.

A huff of a laugh leaves me as I finally lean back in the seat and cross my arms. Fate gave them a mate to share. What a bitch.

"So you haven't seen them yet?"

I only shake my head at her question.

"Well they'll be needing your help soon."

"Why is that?" I don't know who she is, and just like Alec, I don't trust her.

"It seems your father is getting himself into a bit of trouble." Hearing her talk about my father makes my blood run cold. Any semblance of a smile disappears instantly from my face.

"That's enough Bella." Alec's stern scolding wipes the happiness from Bella's face as she nods slightly.

I glance between the two of them before stating calmly, "I have no business with my father and neither do they."

She only offers a small smile that doesn't reach her eyes, nods, and says, "Of course."

"I would know." I attempt to reassure her and stop myself from giving my true opinion about the seers.

In response, Bella merely walks to Alec's side after forcing another small smile for me and gives Alec a kiss on the cheek, taking all of us by surprise. As she opens the door to leave, she turns halfway to face me. "Maybe you should pay your father a visit and see what your pack has become."