Epilogue

Titus

Noel swayed from side to side as she cooked dinner. I noticed that she'd been doing it for a while—since I'd gotten home from work that afternoon—and I couldn't figure it out. So, I was watching her.

I'd been watching her for days, since her due date had come and gone.

Her overnight bag was packed. We'd found a car seat for the new baby that was cool as fuck and turned into a goddamn stroller and that was buckled into the car already. My mom had been hanging with the girls more and more, getting them ready in case Noel had to stay overnight at the hospital. If we had to leave in the middle of the night, Bas and Cian were ready to take over Ariel and Diana duty, but any other time, my mom would head straight over to stay with them.

Everything was set, so now we waited.

It was fucking torture.

I was so filled with anxiety every second of every day that I was afraid I was going to have a heart attack or something. I'd actually had to sit down that morning at work because my heart was racing so fast that I got light-headed. Uncle Casper had seen me and laughed his ass off.

"You good, sugar?" I called, pulling a dress off Diana's doll before handing it back to her.

"I'm good," she replied.

She didn't turn to face me and there was something in her voice that I couldn't pinpoint.

Slowly rising from my chair, I wandered into the kitchen and wrapped my arms around her, resting my chin on her shoulder.

"How you doin', baby?" I asked softly, automatically falling into the same rhythm as her hips moved from side to side.

"Just tired," she replied, dropping her head back against my shoulder for a moment before going back to what she was doing.

She was lying.

"Noel," I growled.

Her stomach shifted beneath my hands and I jolted, my fingers pressing. Every inch I touched was hard as a rock. Then it relaxed again, back to the normal firm I'd grown used to.

"The fuck was that?" I asked in surprise.

"Just a contraction," she replied lightly. "Easy one."

"If it's an easy one, why are you so out of breath?" I asked apprehensively.

She didn't reply.

"Goddamn it," I muttered, pulling her away from the counter.

"Titus, I'm not done," she protested.

"You're done." I led her over to my seat at the table and crouched down. "How long you been havin' 'em?"

She just looked at me.

"How long?"

"Since this morning," she confessed quickly. "But they haven't been that strong and they've been pretty far apart since the last hour. I'm sure we still have plenty of time. I'll just finish dinner and then we can put the girls in bed and—"

"Fuck," I breathed, dropping my head.

As delivery day had gotten closer, I wasn't the only one whose anxiety had ratcheted up. I'd been keeping an eye on Noel as she grew more and more worried about having to go to the birth center. Ariel was going to freak out and Noel didn't like any kind of hospital settings—I'd seen her at her last appointment. All she'd had to do was pee in a cup and get her belly measured and she'd still been strung tight as a guitar string the entire time we'd been in the building. She was terrified, but I'd figured that she'd eventually just realize it had to be done and prepare herself.

She hadn't.

Her hands were trembling as she reached out and cupped my cheek in her palm. "We've got time," she whispered, giving me a tight smile.

"How far apart are we talkin'?" I asked wearily.

"Five—" She paused, her eyes on me. "Three or four minutes."

She was trying to wait until the last possible second to leave, and while I understood it, I was suddenly terrified that she was going to have the baby in the front seat of her car.

I rose to my feet. "Stay put," I ordered, kissing her head.

I found Bas and Cian in the garage.

"It's time," I called, making both of them freeze.

"Yeah?" Bas asked, his expression morphing into a huge smile.

"Oh, yeah," I muttered, rubbing a hand down my face. Fuck.

Fuck.

"I'm gonna call the midwife."

"Fuck yeah," Cian muttered, his eyes bright.

"Bas, you know that thing you ordered?" He nodded. "Better get it."

"Oh, motherfuck," Cian hissed, his smile falling as worry took over.

The girls were oblivious as I called my mom and the midwife, and Noel called Esther. When that was done, Noel pushed to her feet.

"I'm going to take a shower," she announced.

"You think that's smart?" I asked dubiously, looking down at her hips.

"He or she is not going to fall out," she snapped. Her eyes got wide and filled with tears. "I'm sorry."

I wanted to laugh at the epic mood swing, but I didn't.

"No worries," I assured her, holding her hand as she slowly walked across the kitchen and up the stairs.

"Where you going?" Ariel called, watching us.

"Mama's gonna take a shower," I replied. "Stay there. I'll be back in a minute."

"Okay," she said, turning back to what she was doing.

Her things were in my shower, thank God, because I was pretty sure I would've had a stroke if I had to help her over the edge of the tub in the girls' bathroom. She said the contractions were three minutes apart, and I believed her, but they sure seemed like they were happening faster than that and lasting a fuck of a long time.

"Don't know why you need a shower," I grumbled as I helped her undress. "You had one this mornin'."

"And I had you after that," she informed me breathlessly. "I'm showering."

I frowned at her. She raised her eyebrows.

I helped her into the shower and stood right outside the glass door, keeping an eye in case she needed me.

Her clothes had been moved into my room and when she pulled a dress out of a drawer a few minutes later, something inside my chest clenched.

She hadn't worn a dress in weeks.

"It's loose," she explained, pulling on a little bra with no clasp. Her tits had gotten huge and none of the other ones fit. I fucking loved it. She sat down to put on her panties and I kneeled, helping guide her feet into them. I pulled them up as she rose and reached for the dress. "I don't want anything tight on me," she gritted out, pausing for a moment.

"Baby," I chastised, helping her with the dress. "You waited too fuckin' long to tell me."

"I know." She grimaced, her fingers digging into my arm. "I'm sorry."

The girls squealed downstairs, and I figured my mom or Esther had arrived.

"You know how much I love you?" I asked as she walked back into the bathroom.

I kept close but let her do her thing as she put on deodorant, moisturizer, and pulled her hair into one thick braid.

"I know," she said softly, her eyes meeting mine in the mirror.

"We're gonna have three babies soon," I whispered, kissing the side of her neck as I ran my hand over her belly. It was disconcerting how hard it was. "Can't wait."

"Me either," she replied. Taking my hand, she glanced around the bathroom and then shut off the light. I let her lead me out of the room and back down the hallway, stopping a couple of times so she could lean against the wall, panting.

Jesus Christ.

At the stairs, my stomach churned. I moved in front of her, just in case she became unsteady, and helped her down, one by one. When we got to the bottom, she smiled at me, her eyes already looking tired.

Then she looked over, and those tired eyes widened in shock.

"What in the world?" she breathed.

A couple weeks before, when I'd realized that Noel didn't seem to be growing any easier with the idea of having the baby at the birth center, I'd gone to Bas and Cian and laid it all out. I hoped that she'd be ready when the time came. Shit, I'd even prayed for it. But if she wasn't, and the baby was coming, I wasn't going to force her to go.

Noel knew she could have the baby at home. There was no doubt in her mind. We'd discussed it. At length. But because she'd known that the idea of her having the baby at our house freaked me the fuck out—she hadn't even asked to. I could not force her to go to the birth center.

For so much of her life, Noel had been completely powerless. She'd been forced to leave everything she knew behind, forced to get married long before she was ready, forced to quit school and have babies. I would never force her or even try to coerce her to do anything she didn't want to do.

"Your birthing tub," Bas announced, throwing his arms out. He'd already blown the thing up and hooked it to the kitchen faucet and the downstairs bathroom faucets with two long hoses. When I'd gone to him with my worry a couple weeks before, Bas had immediately gone into research mode. He'd found some shit about water births during a late-night web search and let me know about the tub after he'd already ordered the thing.

"My what?" Noel asked, turning her bewildered eyes to mine.

"Hello," a familiar voice called, and we both looked toward the front door as she poked her head inside. Andrea grinned at Noel and stepped inside carrying a large box. "I didn't want to interrupt anything and Titus said I could let myself in," she said, moving toward us.

"What?" Noel looked at me just as realization dawned. "You didn't."

"Welcome to your new birthing center," I replied dryly.

Noel's eyes filled with tears. "Thank you."

Then, as if knowing she didn't have to try and beat them back anymore, Noel bent at the waist and groaned, her hand latching on to my arm like a vise.

"Ah," Andrea said kindly as she reached us. "Looks like things are moving right along."

"You could say that," I muttered.

As soon as the contraction was over, Bas and Cian brought the girls over to give Noel hugs and kisses before carrying them upstairs.

"We're gonna get our baby?" Ariel asked, excitement making her bounce on Cian's arm.

"We're gettin' our baby," I confirmed. "Now go watch a movie with Uncle Bas and Uncle Cian. I'll come get you when it's here."

"They," she corrected as Cian carried her up the stairs. "Our baby's not it!"

"She's gettin' bossy," I muttered to Noel, making her giggle.

By the time Esther and my mom came in the front door, Noel had already frantically torn off the dress she was wearing and was kneeling on the floor, her hips rocking from side to side as she leaned against the couch.

"You're lucky your mom called me," Esther snapped at me, going straight to her sister. "I was already on my way to the birth center."

"I asked her to call you," I replied distractedly. Andrea had shown me how to push on Noel's lower back and I was trying to do that while also seriously worried that I was going to hurt her.

A little while later, the tub was half full and I helped Noel inside, ignoring her sister and my mother as I stripped down to my boxers and followed her in.

"That's it, Titus," Andrea said in approval.

Right, Andrea was there, too.

It lasted for hours.

Both of us were sweating.

I'd been so afraid she would have the baby in the car, I hadn't even had time to worry that I'd have to watch her in pain for so long.

I started to worry.

"Doing so well, Noel," Andrea praised, sitting at her head outside the tub. "You're doing so well."

Tears were leaking down Noel's face, her teeth clenched in a grimace.

"Not long now, honey," my mom murmured from her spot on the couch. She was leaning forward, her hands clasped tightly between her knees.

"Don't you just want them to all shut the fuck up?" Esther asked her sister conspiratorially, leaning over to push Noel's sweaty hair back from her face.

Noel let out a hoarse chuckle as her hand found mine beneath the water.

We stayed like that for so long. Our fingers and toes were pruned when Noel shot up onto her knees and announced that she wanted out of the water right now.

Andrea smiled knowingly and helped me get Noel out, helping her onto a quilt that my mom had brought from home.

"No, it's going to stain," Noel said to me pleadingly when she saw it. "Baby, get something else."

"It's a family quilt, sugar," I whispered, leaning in close. "Let's have our baby on it."

She let out a sob as she nodded.

Then she was all business.

It was like, all of a sudden, things happened in hyperspeed.

Noel grunted and moaned and the tendons in her neck stuck out so far that they looked like they were about to burst from her skin. She stayed on her knees, her arms around my neck and Andrea on the quilt behind her.

Her face flooded with color.

"Almost there," Andrea called out. "You've got a bald baby."

"You can see them?" I asked, looking down Noel's back.

"I can," Andrea replied, glancing up at me. "You want to look?"

"No." The answer was instantaneous. I wasn't moving from my spot.

Noel panted against my neck, and every muscle in her body tightened.

A cry split the air, and everyone in the room lost their breath.

"You have a beautiful baby girl," Andrea said with a little laugh.

"Another girl?" Noel asked me, her eyes still dazed.

"Another girl," I confirmed, kissing her.

Me and Esther helped Noel onto her side, stuffing a couple of pillows under her to prop her up.

And then there she was. Covered in white shit. Pissed as hell. Flailing.

Andrea laid the baby girl on Noel's chest and my mom tucked a small gray blanket around her.

"Mom's pretty tired," Andrea said softly. "Dad, why don't you put a hand on baby's back, just in case."

Dad.

My throat closed as I nodded, resting my hand on her tiny little back.

My mom's hand settled between my shoulder blades in almost the exact same spot.

"She's so pretty," Noel hiccuped. "Did you see?"

She looked up at me, and I almost started bawling. My eyes were blurry but I nodded anyway. "I saw," I rasped.

"You are beloved and wanted and prayed for," Noel whispered, her voice hitching as she pressed her lips against the baby girl's head. "Welcome to the world, Ruth Hawthorne." Her eyes met mine. "Daddy and I love you so much."

Stay tuned for the next story in the Hawthornes series.

Myla…or maybeLou…or perhapsFrankie.

You'll have to wait and see.

Coming Fall 2024.