Chapter 23

CHAPTERTWENTY-THREE

Inside,the house is simpler than I’d expected. Or perhaps I’m used to Mother’s flair for showy aesthetics and luxury.

Dark hardwood floors contrast with white pillars and high, carved ceilings. I can see through the open space and out the windows to the water beyond. A single set of stairs curls up to a loft-style walkway adorned with iron railings.

It’s surprisingly cozy for how grand it is. Then again, everything in Nevaris seems welcoming.

Piano notes waft through the air, accompanied by a rich, deep voice. The music slams into me, eliciting goosebumps.

“Whoa,” I murmur. I’m overwhelmed with familiarity, as if I’ve dreamt about this place before. I’ve never been here though; I’d remember a place like this.

Callan chuckles at me before striding toward an open doorway on the left side of the room. I follow him, and the piano notes grow louder. We enter a gorgeous formal sitting area with creamy accents. The far side of the room boasts a grand piano, which is set in the center of a raised platform beneath a circular wall of windows.

My breath catches as I take in the elegant man whose slender fingers dance across the ivories with ease. His eyes are shut as he plays a passionate yet haunting tune. Whatever he’s singing about doesn’t matter; I can’t pay attention to the words with how transfixed I am.

“He’s decent. I know.” Callan grins, nudging me with his elbow.

At the sound of our arrival, Lex’s eyes flash open, and he cuts his song short. His piercing eyes lock onto me. Butterflies flutter in my stomach, but I manage to school my expression.

“What brings you here?” Lex asks in that appealing accent of his. “Have I not provided you with everything you need?”

“I—yes. Thank you.” I’m unsure of what to say. Why am I here? Suddenly I can’t explain why I thought it was a good idea to show up here. I’m at a loss for words, distracted by Lex in his sharp suit and styled hair. The mansion seems emptier without the music filtering through it, and I mourn the loss of his beautiful song.

“I offered her a tour in exchange for some of Fara’s strudel,” Callan says, gesturing toward my basket. I grip it tightly in front of me like a shield. “She has more if you’d like one.”

“No thank you,” Lex says without taking his eyes off me.

As he rises from the bench, his shirt strains against his toned chest. The top few buttons are undone, and I catch a glimpse of his crossed-sword tattoo. Despite his lax approach to buttoning, he’s much more refined than the man I met in the pit. His hair is immaculately styled into a low bun. A five-o’clock shadow clings artfully to his jaw.

He adjusts his cuffs as he prowls toward me, his eyes devouring me. “Glad to see you in something more appropriate,” he says with approval.

“Who do you think you are, my father?” I scoff. How dare he criticize my outfit choices? Is that why he brought me new clothes? Was a little bit of midriff and arm too much skin for him? “Not that it’s anything to you, but I love my Hakranian clothes.”

“I meant appropriate for the weather,” he says, arching a brow in amusement. “Your previous ensemble wasn’t suitable for a mountain.”

“Oh” is all I can say as my cheeks flush with embarrassment.

“Enjoy the tour, luv,” he calls as he strides past me, exiting the room.

I stand there, wondering if I should go after him to ask about the power sharing bond, but I can’t force my feet to move. Lex’s presence has rendered me motionless.

“So, this is the piano room,” Callan says, spreading his arms dramatically as he breaks the awkward silence Lex’s abrupt departure left us in.

“I figured as much,” I mutter, glancing around. “What’s with all the flowers?” Floral arrangements in all shapes and sizes fill every surface in the room. Some appear to have been professionally arranged, while some are a mishap of colors and styles.

“The villagers picked flowers for Lex, to showcase their delight. It’s a Nevaris tradition to gift flowers or foods.”

Fara did say something about Lex that stuck with me: Lex’s visitors normally come in chains or…without a head. It seems Lex is potentially violent and unhinged, yet the villagers care for him enough to showcase their pleasure and admiration. It’s a paradox.

I lean in to smell a bouquet of yellow roses, and chatter reaches my ears—a soft, feminine lilt and a deeper, hushed tone. The voices grow louder, until a tall woman with white-blonde hair and porcelain skin enters the room, followed by a muscular man with dark, upturned eyes and hair so black it’s almost blue. They wear casual clothes, with daggers strapped to their sides like Callan.

When they spot me, they abruptly stop talking.

“Callan, you didn’t tell us you were bringing a friend ’round today,” the woman says. A sad look flickers across her features before she composes herself and greets me. “Hello.” It’s curt but not unfriendly.

“I’m not his friend. I’m Astrid.” The words are bitter as they leave my mouth, but to my relief, Callan snorts a laugh before I can feel guilty about being rude. Perhaps Lex was right about my attitude problem.

“I know.” The woman smiles, and it lights up her face. “I’m Loisia—Lo for short. This is Sora. He’s not much of a talker.” She juts a thumb in his direction, and he grunts in acknowledgement. “Sorry to interrupt your little powwow, but the three of us need to go.” She shoots Callan a serious look, and he nods grimly.

“Feel free to give yourself that tour,” he says, flashing me an apologetic smile. “Thanks for the strudel!”

Before I can reply, the three of them turn and walk off briskly, their boots clacking in harmony. Sora turns at the last second before rounding the corner. Wordlessly, he glides over to me, slipping his hand into my basket and snagging a strudel.

My brows lift at his forwardness and lack of manners, but he doesn’t acknowledge me as he strides after his friends.

“Sure,” I say to his retreating back. “Help yourself to my strudel.”

Sighing, I plop the basket of pastries down on a side table that isn’t completely crowded with flower bouquets.

I should really find Lex and see how long it’ll take to break the bond.

As oddly charming and quaint as this town is, I don’t belong here. Hakran needs me to step into the role of queen, so the sooner I can win my people over, the better. Plus, I don’t want to leave Ilona and Dash without answers for any longer than I need to.

It’s only been half a day, and I’m already on edge from missing them. As soon as I can guarantee I won’t rage out and murder anyone else, I’m gone.

With that thought, I mosey around, exploring the house as I search for Lex. All is silent on the first floor, so I head upstairs, tracing the iron railing with a finger and admiring its intricate details.

My thoughts wander back to Lex at the piano, and I wonder how long he’s played. What else he’s good at with those slender fingers. My stomach twists itself into knots as my thoughts take an unexpected turn and an image of Lex shirtless, on top of me, flashes into my mind. I inwardly curse myself, shaking the image away before it goes any further.

I’m oddly drawn to Lex. I can’t help but wonder if our energies call to one another because we are vygoras? I don’t feel drawn to Cedrik though, not even a little bit, and he’s a vygora too.

Then there’s the mystery of how my magic flowed into Lex so easily during our transference.

Is it because of how powerful Lex is? Perhaps that’s why I’m drawn to him. But it seems like more than that.

At the top of the stairs, in the loft, I pass through an informal sitting area. The aesthetic is softer than downstairs, with beige carpet and low ceilings that make the space feel more intimate. I follow the only hallway until I come upon an open door.

Cautiously, I peek my head into the room. It’s a large bedroom with plush carpet, a stone accented fireplace, an oversized bed, and a small sitting area. Arching beams overhead give it an airy feel.

Across the room, glass doors reveal a patio overlooking the lake. Lex stands with his back to me, leaning on the iron railing as he sips from a glass.

“Lex?” I call, trying not to sneak up on him. Slowly he turns to me, his green eyes dark and stormy.

“You shouldn’t be here,” he says, chugging his beverage before entering the room. Crossing to the small table beside the fireplace, he grabs a decanter filled with the same dark liquid, refilling his glass and slamming it back.

“Drink?” he asks without looking at me.

“Sure,” I say hesitantly.

I step closer to him, and our fingers brush as I accept a freshly filled glass of amber liquid. My body tingles at his touch, and he pauses, letting his hand linger like he feels it too.

He releases the glass and jerks away, tugging at the collar of his silk shirt with a sigh. It almost appears as if he’s rattled by my presence.

Why would he invite me to have a drink with him if he’s uncomfortable around me?

I sip the beverage, and wince. The liquid burns as it slides down my throat.

Whiskey.

I’ve tasted it before, but I’m not partial to it. Lex watches as I work to hide my disgust.

“I should’ve known you wouldn’t like that,” he murmurs.

“That would’ve been presumptuous of you. And it’s just fine, thank you.”

“Lies,” he says, trying to hide his smirk behind his glass. When he finishes swallowing, he slowly licks the last drops off his lips. I track the movement a little too eagerly. “Stop looking at me like that, luv.”

“Like what?” I ask, but it comes out breathlessly. Suddenly, it’s too hot in the room—too intimate. Even though there’s a good foot of distance between us, his presence is electrifying.

This man is totally different than the one I met in the pit. His musky pine scent is heady.

An ache builds between my legs, and I squirm in response.

Shit.

I’m attracted to Lex.

I try to hide the realization behind another gulp of whiskey.My cheeks heat with a mixture of lust and embarrassment. I’m not normally shy, nor do I have any problem going after what I want. But this desire is entirely unwelcome. It’s confusing, especially while I’m trying to build something real for the first time ever—with Dash.

Dash and I haven’t labeled our relationship. Never declared monogamy. Yet I still feel guilty about my attraction to Lex.

My head buzzes with whiskey as I stare at Lex’s sharp features. His demeanor is so cold and off-putting, yet his actions are kind. The contradiction turns me on. It unravels me.

“We can’t do this, Lex,” I say, stepping backward to put some distance between us.

He laughs. It’s the first time such a positive expression has crossed his face. When he’s done laughing, he swipes his thumb across his bottom lip, staring at me like I’m the most amusing creature he’s ever seen.

“We are not doing anything,” he says, his voice tinted with humor. “Lust is nothing to be ashamed of.”

I don’t know if I’m more horrified that he noticed what I was feeling or that he called me out on it directly.

“Lust?” I ask incredulously. “You’re wrong.” I shake my head.

“Astrid,” he says. “I don’t need to use my power to see the way you’re writhing like a cat in heat.” His eyes spark with need as they slowly trail down my body. I’m frozen in place, feeling vulnerable beneath his gaze.

“You’re wrong.”

He shrugs in response, not taking his eyes off me. I huff at him, hating myself for being so obvious and hating him for being so observant.

So attractive.

This has to stop. I don’t even know anything about him.

“You live like a king. You’re worshiped by the villagers like one. But you’re not.” I gesture around the lavish room, trying to ignore my incredibly inconvenient attraction to him. “So who exactly are you, Lex?”

He moves until he’s directly in front of me, and I’m forced to tilt my head up. This close, I can see the various shades of green and grey swirling around his irises. Our chests rise and fall in sync.

“There are other beings far more powerful than your measly kings and queens,” he says. He reaches out, leisurely tracing my jaw with his finger. It’s innocent enough, but my body shudders at his touch. I squeeze my thighs together, trying to ignore the heat building there.

I have a sudden urge to strip my clothes off and press my body against his.

To let his slender fingers dance across my body like they did the piano keys.

To press my lips to his and see if they’re as soft as they appear.

Instead, I say, “Your inflated sense of self-importance is sickening,” and roll my eyes dramatically. Normally arrogance is a turn-off, but Lex wears it well. It only adds to his appeal.

“It would be an inflated sense of self-importance if my words were false.” He’s so close that his warm breath tickles my face, carrying the bitter stench of alcohol.

“Are you drunk?” I ask, slamming my own empty glass down on the table beside us and breaking the spell between us.

“Barely.”

“Don’t lie to me.”

“I’ve never lied to you,” he growls, locking eyes with me again. “It takes more than a few glasses of whiskey to intoxicate me.”

“Then tell me honestly why my mother threw you in the pit.”

“Because Enira fears me.” His words are low, like a warning to back off from the conversation. I ignore the threat and press on, my head swimming from the alcohol. Perhaps I shouldn’t have chugged such a large quantity of whiskey so quickly. Unlike Lex, my tolerance is quite low.

“If you’re so almighty and terrifying, how did she overpower you?” I ask.

Sighing, he breaks his glare from me, running a hand through his perfectly styled hair and messing it up. It falls free of where it was tied at the nape of his neck, resting around his shoulders in thick waves.

There’s something incredibly satisfying about getting under Lex’s skin, seeing him come undone. There are so many different sides to him: the prisoner, the terrifying vygora, the caring man who gave me the shirt off his back and offered me a safe place to stay.

And I’ve yet to witness the murderous tendencies Fara spoke of. All in all, I’m intrigued. I should step away, but he’s sucking me right in.

Most fascinating of all, he’s always calm and in control, no matter what circumstances I’ve witnessed him in. It’s as if his emotions never truly affect him, which as a vygora, I know is false. We feel things much more acutely than other people.

“She caught me when I was at my weakest,” he says, snapping my attention back to him. There’s danger in his eyes, and I yearn to see him lose control, to let the beast inside of him free. “I was searching for something she took.”

“Something that belongs to you?”

“Yes,” he whispers.

“Did you find it?”

His jaw tenses, and he glances away without answering. He suddenly shifts from dangerous to vulnerable, and it beckons to me. I step forward, and before I know what I’m doing, I reach my arms around him. He surprises me by hugging me back. We fit together perfectly.

Slowly, I tilt my head up to look at him. My tongue darts out to moisten my lips, and his pupils dilate. His hardness strains against his pants, pressing against me, begging for this as much as I am. My heart rate increases, and just when I think he’s going to close the distance between us, he tenses up, pulling away.

“No. Like you said, we can’t do this. I refuse to take advantage of your current state.” He adjusts his pants, hiding the proof of his arousal, and I’m desperate to draw him back to me, to resume whatever was happening between us.

I’m intoxicated.

But not because of the whiskey.

Because of him.

“You don’t have to be decent with me. I’m an adult. I can make my own decisions,” I retort. When he doesn’t reply, I add, “It was just a hug.” I throw in an eye roll for good measure, pretending I’m unaffected by his rejection.

“Then maybe I refuse to do this to your little friend Dale or Dan or—”

“Dash,” I say irritably, hating that he brought him up right now. The spell shatters completely. Guilt and shame claw at my chest.

I’ve been so worried about not being able to trust anyone else that I’ve failed to realize I can’t even trust myself…at least not right now. Not with everything going on. I was so desperate to escape the plaguing emotions that I’m falling for anyone who offers me an escape.

Dash was an escape from Mother’s manipulation and my own mind. Lex is an escape from everything else in my life.

How can I trust my feelings toward either of these men? I’ve gone almost my entire life without finding attraction deeper than skin-level, and now I’m battling with my attraction toward two different men.

One man I know nothing about, and one I can’t fully trust.

I back away toward the door, interrupting whatever Lex is about to say. “I need to go,” I whisper.

Lex calls after me, but he doesn’t follow me as I run down the stairs and out his front door. My borrowed boots slap across the stone bridge as I run. I don’t stop until I make it all the way to the apartment.

I secure the deadbolt and chain lock behind me, then, panting, sink down onto the floor. The tears fall, and I let them, knowing it won’t do me any good to hold them in.

This time, the tears are for me.