Chapter Two 554

Chapter Two

When we push through the front door, I’m hit by the familiar and un- comforting smell of home. Stale beer and cigarettes smoke cling to this place like the fucking herps. We’ve grown up in a damn wonderland.

“Daddy?” I sing, swinging the door closed behind us. “We’re delinquents!”

“For fuck's sake, Alara,” Calder hisses behind me. “Why do you always have to get him riled up? Would it have killed you to lock down your inner chaos pixie for one afternoon? I was really hoping we could spend it alone. We really need to talk –”

“I don’t want to talk, Cal.” I grin, watching my father stumble into the room. “Unlike everyone else, I like you feral.”

“My baby.” My father throws open his arms, and I fall into them, letting him wrap me in a warm hug. He’s a drunk for sure, but he’s not as crazy as the town makes him out to be.

“Your mind's not totally broken, is it, Daddy? It’s just a little bent.” He’s been as good of a father as he could be, given the circumstances. Because, unlike his mind, his heart is completely shattered. Has been for as long as I can remember. But he’s still here with us, and that’s something no one else has ever done for us.

“Your mama’s coming back, kiddo. I can feel it right here.” He taps his finger over his heart. This softer version of my father is the one Calder resembles the most. At least, when he’s not trying to rip someone’s head off.

“I know, Daddy.” I step back and cup his cheek in my palm. “Have you eaten today? Can you check his pills?” I motion to his medication sorter on the counter.

Calder sighs, dumping the palm full of meds into his hand. “You know you have to take these every morning. Every. Single. Day. Seven days a week. Always.”

“I don’t need those damn things!” Dad sneers.

“Mama will be pissed as fuck if you don’t take them.” I bite my lip, hiding the lie for the good of my father.

“Alara,” Calder warns, hating when I manipulate him like this, but I’m not in the mood for this kind of fight, and he has to take the pills, regardless. Another mental break and they will lock him up. I can’t lose another parent to that place. I won’t.

“Gimme.” He practically snatches them out of Calder’s hand and swallows them down with his beer. “I miss them so much.” He walks over to the recliner and flops down, lifting a photo of the six of us from the table. His eyes shimmer with unshed tears, studying the faces staring back at him from behind the glass. “So beautiful that the Lord saw it fit to bless this rock with three. They were identical, right down to the freckles that peppered their noses. And I was lucky enough to love the set and be loved in return. You look so much like them, Alara. My beautiful little miracle.”

Now I feel bad about it. Shit. I lift a blanket from the back of the couch and drape it over his lap as his eyes get too heavy to hold open.

“Don’t let him ruin you,” Dad mutters when I take Calder's hand and tug him down the hallway to our room. “You’re too beautiful for this place, baby. You have to get out before he ruins you.”

***

When we get to our room, I flop down on the bed and roll my eyes. “What’s with all the dramatics today?”

“Dramatics?” Calder looks at me like I’ve lost my mind. “Alara, your father is mentally unstable, and you have a fucking stalker. It’s only dramatic if the problems at hand aren’t actually problems. And they are. ”

“Daddy will be fine, and what stalker?” I press my lips together, knowing full well what he’s talking about.

“You know what? Forget it.” Calder flings open the window and kicks out a leg, ready to take off. “I can’t do this with you anymore today.”

“Fucking fine.” I grab the back of his shirt and pull him down with me. “What do you want me to say, Cal? You want me to tell you that Aaron isn’t a problem? He is. I think. He’s a big fucking problem. Maybe. Honestly, I don’t know. We’ve never actually sat down and asked him, have we? We don’t know what his motivation is. Maybe he wants to fuck; maybe he wants to have tea. We just don’t know, do we? But right now I’m living rent-free in his head and I would like to know why so that we can move out. I don’t want to live in his head, Cal… I want nothing more than to go back to being invisible. But for whatever reason, I can’t seem to go unnoticed anywhere anymore.”

“Whatever reason?” He rolls onto his side, greeting me with a lopsided grin. “Come on, Alara. You know the reason.”

“It doesn’t make it okay, Cal.” I turn, facing him, mirroring the way he’s lying beside me. He lifts a finger, running it along my jaw, down my neck, and gently traces the curve of my collarbone .

“These people treat us like things, not people, simply because of where we came from, not who we are.” A tear escapes from the corner of my eye in my moment of vulnerability, and I allow it to tickle its way down my cheek, uninterrupted. “They don’t even ask us what we want. They just push.”

“And what do you want, Alara?” he asks.

“You, Calder. I want everyone else to fuck the hell off, for Daddy to get better, and I need to spend the rest of my life loving you.” I squeeze my eyes shut, wishing for a world I know will never exist, waiting for… something … when his mouth crashes into mine. The force of his kiss steals my breath and rips past my reservations. He doesn’t give in to me often, but right now, I can feel that feral man from the cafeteria clawing his way to the surface, desperate to remind me who I really belong to.

“You’re safe.” He gasps between kisses, pulling back just enough to drag my shirt over my head.

“I love you.” His long, lean fingers, push my skirt up my thighs, bunching it around my waist, and I yank at his waistband, using my toes to pull down his pants and boxers, and I whimper when he settles between my legs, the head of his cock pushing against my entrance .

“I’m sorry,” he rasps as his dick slides inside my cunt, stretching and filling me in a way I could never allow anyone else to do.

His thrusts are carefully measured, bordering on making love but still desperate. He slams into me just to slowly back off, each thrust bringing me closer to the brink, only to be brought crashing back down.

“Calder,” I beg, so close to the edge yet still starving for more of us.

“Tell me what you need, Alara.” He looks down at me, his eyes mirroring the hunger in mine.

“I want –” I gasp, “No. I need to cum.”

“Yeah?” He wraps his arms around me, burying his face in my hair, and circles his hips, grinding against my clit. “Then cum for me, beautiful. Cum for me right… now .” His breath hitches as my orgasm rips through my body. There is no foreplay when we’re together, no promises or plans for forever, just raw need and the knowledge that any happiness we find together can only ever be short-lived. We will always hide in the shadows.

“Alara.” He chokes out my name, picking up his pace, slamming into me over and over while the tremors continue to rack my small body. “I’m –” he stutters, and I can feel his cock swell inside me. “I’m going to cum.”

“Fall into me, Cal.” I cling to him, holding him as tightly as possible, wishing we could stay like this. Here. Alone. “You’re safe. I love you.”

He slows and then stills. I can still feel his cock twitching inside of me, his cum warm and running down the crack of my ass and onto the clean sheet beneath us, but I don’t care.

“I’m so fucking sorry,” he whispers into my hair, and I know what’s coming next.

“Don’t.” I turn my face, kissing his neck, feeling him retreating into the role society expects of him, and I hate it.

“Your father is right. I’m fucking ruining you.” He rolls off of me, snatches a towel from the table, and cleans us both up, avoiding my gaze.

“Cal…” I wait patiently for him to make eye contact with me. “My father is touched in the head. And he married a set of triplets. So don’t let him get to you.”

“Go get a shower, and I’ll handle dinner.” He leans over, dropping a kiss on my forehead, trying to change the subject, and I let him, knowing his guilt isn’t letting up today .

“Okay,” I sit up, gathering the sheet around my body, suddenly feeling far too exposed under the weight of his regret. “But only if it’s pizza.”

“I think I can handle that.” He glances back up at me with a big grin and takes my hand. “I love you, Alara. The world around us may be screaming how wrong it is, but my love for you… it drowns all of them out. I would die for you.”

“I know that, Cal.” I lift his hand to my lips, kissing each letter of my name tattooed across his knuckles, and then look up from under my lashes with a bratty grin. “But I’ll never let that happen. I would rather sit atop the ashes, bleeding with you, than bear one second on this rock without you. Now, go make my pizza before I change my mind.”

I stand up, swinging my hips as I saunter from our room to the bathroom, letting the sheet fall away from my body as I go. Intentionally tempting him. Needing to know that he doesn’t regret what we’ve grown into. Not truly. Not where it counts.

“Fuck,” he chokes out behind me, and my heart sings. “You’re killing me, Alara.”

“Oh yeah?” I look back over my shoulder with a wink, and he jumps from the bed, rushes toward me, tosses me over his shoulder, and carries me into the shower. “So no pizza, then?” I tease.

“I’ll still make you dinner, beautiful girl.” He turns on the water, sits me down under the warm stream, and grips my ass, pulling me flush against his hard, wet body. “But first, I’m going to teach your bratty ass a lesson.”

“Oh yeah?” I bite my lower lip, slowly dragging it between my teeth until it pops free. “Well then, Cal, Show me what you’ve got in mind.”

“Fuck.” I moan as I watch him lower to his knees and bury his face between my thighs. “Cal, I-I –” My body trembles, and I struggle to stay standing.

“Don’t you dare cum yet, Alara,” he mutters against the tender flesh. “If you cum again so early, I will take your ass and your pussy before I feed you.” He buries one and then two fingers in my cunt, curling them into my g-spot.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck.” I tremble, trying to fight the urge to fall apart, and he spins me around, pressing my face against the cool tile wall.

“Can I –” He stands and teases my ass with the head of his cock, and I jerkily nod.

“I’m yours, Cal. ”

He snatches the lube from the shower shelf, shaking and squeezing a generous amount into the palm of his hand, spreading it over his cock before sliding two lube-covered fingers into my ass.

“Oh fuck, oh fuck.” I pant, pushing against the burning stretch, knowing his cock is far bigger than two fingers. “Just… just do it,” I beg, a moan ripping from our throats simultaneously as he fully slides into my ass.

“Are you okay, Alara?” He stills, waiting for me to adjust to his size.

“Yeah –” I cough. “I mean, yes.” I take a few deep breaths before pushing back into him.

“God damn, your ass is so fucking tight.” He slowly moves in and out, careful not to start too rough. That was a mistake we made early on, but not now. Now he knows my body better than his own, taking his time to read and memorize every one of my reactions to him. My body is his, and my pleasure is all he needs to find his own. Maybe it’s our shared blood, or maybe it’s just love, but either way, we were made for each other.

“Cal?” I beg, pushing against him to meet every thrust, not allowing him to slow for fear of hurting me, forcing him to find his orgasm faster than he had intended .

“You’re going to pay for that, my beautiful girl.” He growls, pulsing inside me. “I’m going to clean you, feed you, and then fuck all of your holes over and over until the sun rises. Understand?”

“Uh-huh.” I grin, turning so he can wash my hair.

“And here I thought you were my good girl.” He buries his hand in my locks, yanking my head back so he can look into my eyes.

“I can be a good girl.” I drop to my knees in front of him, on the shower floor, and look up at him before asking, “Cal? Did you ever think that I was actually the one ruining you?” before swallowing his cock.