Chapter 21

Louisastared at Killik for a jangling, frozen moment, her hand clutched over her wildly pounding heart.

Killikwas here. He'd seen that. And he was even smiling, rigid and cold, as his eyes snapped and blazed with fury.

"Killik," Ulfarr croaked, and his eyes squeezed shut, his hand rubbing at his nose. "Did not — scent you."

"Ach, I saw," Killik said, and his voice might have almost been pleasant, if not for the rage still glittering in his eyes. "If you had scented me, what should you instead have done? Leapt apart before I saw you? Play-acted as though you should never do this, whilst your scents betrayed your falsehood?"

Hisvoice scraped up Louisa's spine, cold and bitter, while Ulfarr flinched, his hand rubbing at his face. "I should not have — done it thus — without you, at all," he said, hoarse, "had I known it would — vex you, thus."

Louisa'sstomach twisted, not just at Ulfarr's words, his clearly stated regret at kissing her like that — but also at the horrible, palpable misery in his eyes, sagging down his shoulders. Looking hurt, sad, wounded, and curse Killik, he was lurching closer to Ulfarr, staring him in the eyes, as his dagger viciously whirled in his fingers.

"Ach, would you?" he drawled. "Just the same as you would have told me you were fetching this woman today? Bringing her here? Without even granting me a warning of this?"

Ulfarr'seyes closed, the pain spasming on his mouth, and Killik laughed, his dagger spinning even faster in his hand. "Ach, it so pleases me when my dearest brother speaks false to me," he crooned, and he even raised his hand to Ulfarr's face, stroking sweetly down his cheek. "It brings me such joy when he takes my help, and my gifts, and my pleasure — and then turns about and offers me secrets and sneaking and lies!"

Hewas almost shouting by the end, spitting in Ulfarr's face, even as he kept caressing his cheek. WhileUlfarr betrayed a jerky, visceral flinch, as sharp as if Killik had slapped him across the face.

Andgods damn Killik, it was like he was kicking a cowering dog — and before she'd even caught it, Louisa lurched forward, and knocked Killik's stroking hand away from Ulfarr's face.

"Leave him the hell alone, you prick," she snarled. "He's an adult, and he's damned well allowed to decide how he wants to spend a day, and who he wants to spend it with! Especially when" — she hauled in a deep breath — "he did come to you first this morning! And he found you busy in bed fucking someone else!"

Hervoice echoed through the stone-walled room, and for an instant, Killik's taut body stilled, his eyes angling narrow toward Ulfarr's face. But then he spun toward Louisa, his teeth bared, his eyes shimmering with something like glee, or mockery, or… or hatred.

"Ach, and have you yet told him why he found me thus, woman?" he purred, his eyes glinting dangerously on hers. "Have you told him whose rule this was? Whose selfish demand this was? Who will no longer allow me to even touch him, let alone share his bed, so I must now seek relief elsewhere?"

No. No. Damn it, damn Killik, he hadn't just thrown that out between them, not now, not like this. But yes, yes, he had, his eyes blazing with triumph, with that same seething hatred.

Andeven as Louisa recoiled, the misery plummeting in her belly, her gaze snapped back to — to Ulfarr. To where he again looked as though he'd been struck, his eyes wide and disbelieving on Louisa's face.

"You… demanded this?" he asked her, the bewilderment scraping through his voice. "You did not wish Killik to touch me? But only today, you said — you told me you did not mind this. You said you knew Killik was my — we had a —"

Hisdismayed eyes darted toward Killik, whose mouth was now pressed into a thin, spiteful smile. "Ach, but she is a human," Killik spat. "And we ken how humans hoard their secrets, do we not? How they speak their falsehoods so smoothly, whilst seeking to gain our trust, and bend us to their will!"

What? Louisa's mouth fell open, her head rapidly shaking, her hand clutching for Ulfarr's cold, sweaty fingers — but no, no, he yanked his hand away, he was backing away from her, from Killik, slightly stumbling over a fur rug behind him. And he looked so pale, so horrified, his eyes almost fearful on Louisa's face, no, no, no —

"No, sweetheart," she gulped, on a lurching, staggering step forward. "I wasn't — I didn't mean to — I just didn't want to —"

Buther thoughts were scattering, scrambling, and her helpless eyes darted toward — Killik. Who just kept smiling at her like that, cruel and malicious, as if he would gladly use that dagger, and slit her throat wide open, and laugh.

"What, woman?" Killik drawled at her. "Why can you not speak this to him? It could not be that you do not wish him to hear it?"

Oh, fuck this lying vicious snake, and Louisa half-laughed, half-roared as she whirled back toward him. "Fuck — you," she spat. "Fuck you, you absolute scum. If you felt so damned distressed about this, you could have damn well told him yourself! Rather than letting him think you didn't even want him, and then leaving him alone last night, and running off and fucking someone else! And when you got caught, blaming all your guilt on me!"

Hervoice was fully shouting, now, ringing out between them, but she couldn't stop, she couldn't. "And you should feel guilty," she snarled. "If you really care about him so much, maybe you could keep your cock in your trousers for a week or two! We only have seven more nights, for fuck's sakes!"

ButKillik only laughed, and growled, and spun that dagger toward her, pointing its sharp, gleaming tip at her chest. "Six," he hissed. "You now only have six nights, woman, for you have come here and near ploughed my wolf today, without my leave. And if you test me further, mayhap I shall grant you no more nights at all!"

Louisa'sbreath froze in her chest, her eyes caught on that gleaming dagger-tip pointing toward her. But he wouldn't, surely he wouldn't, what about her property, her staff, her home —

Andcurse it, Ulfarr. Ulfarr, who was still staring at them like that, backing away from them, shaking his head. And in a sudden, jerky movement, he wrenched around, and strode for the door. His head down, his shoulders hunched, his big hands in tight fists at his sides.

Damnit. Damn it. Louisa choked an unintelligible noise, reached a shaky hand after him — but foolish, he was gone, already gone. And beside Louisa, Killik was staring after him too, his own hand outstretched, his dagger shivering in midair — but then he dropped the hand and frowned darkly at Louisa, cursing under his breath.

Louisacursed too, and dragged both hands against her sweaty hair. Should she follow Ulfarr? Try to apologize? Tell him she hadn't meant to lie to him, she hadn't meant any of this, it was Killik, always fucking Killik —

"Are you happy now?" she belatedly demanded, spinning around to glare at him. "Was that just as satisfying as you've been dreaming it would be?"

Killikgave a low hiss, baring his teeth toward her, but Louisa hissed straight back. "You did not say I couldn't ever touch Ulfarr without you," she growled. "I thought you wanted this for him. And of course he thought so too! Especially since you left him last night, and then he walked in on you fucking someone else this morning! What the fuck else did you expect?!"

Shewas shouting again, flailing her arm between them, and Killik's sharp growl vibrated in her chest, deep in her belly. "I expected you to know better, woman!" he shot back. "Our pledge was for ten nights. It was for pleasure. It was to teach him to find joy with a woman again, and this is all. It was not for you to spend a whole day larking about with him, here at our camp, whilst I was away working, with no knowledge of this! It was not for him to bring you here alone to our home, to meet all our kin, with his scent — and only his scent — reeking all over you, so they shall now see you as his mate!"

What? Louisa gaped at him, as a sudden, striking comprehension flashed through the sheer sweeping rage. Ulfarr bringing her here had been… a statement, to all these people? Or… or even an announcement of their relationship, somehow? And had Ulfarr… known that? HadUlfarrwanted to make that statement? He didn't like Louisa enough to want her as a mate… right? Because — wasn't a mate more like… a wife?

Louisablinked, swallowed, gave a bracing shake of her head. "There's no way that's what he was trying to do," she said, though her voice wavered. "He was lonely, and hurt, and wanted company! And he even brought Halthorr along as a chaperone, probably because" — the awareness belatedly jolted through her brain — "he didn't want to upset you! And besides, he told me he doesn't even live here, this isn't his home, and that's probably because of you, too!"

Killikstared back at her, his eyes glittering with furious disbelief. "That has naught to do with me," he snarled back. "That is a sentence from our kin upon him, to keep him trapped in that curst mountain, where he shall never again find joy! ButI swear upon Skai-kesh" — another sharp jab of his dagger toward her — "he longs for this camp as his home! And now he has marched you straight into it! He would have ploughed you here today, and flooded this room with his claim upon you, had I not walked in, and broken this!"

Louisa'sthoughts were spinning, her heartbeat pounding in her ears, her head whipping back and forth. Killik was so wrong, he was so enraging, and he was just jealous, and he really thought… he thought…

"Gods damn it, Killik," Louisa managed, tight in her throat. "I'm not trying to — to take Ulfarr from you. Tosteal him from you."

ButKillik's laugh had a strange, brittle edge to it, far too loud in the silence. "Ach, no," he drawled. "You will not. For we both know you shall never do what you must to be a true orc's mate. Shall you?"

Louisa'smouth opened and closed, her brow furrowing — and Killik laughed again, gave a wild whirl of his dagger. "Shall you abandon your home, and your lands?" he asked. "Shall you come to live at OrcMountain, and stand tall with the shamed Wolf of the Skai? Shall you learn of all his grief and his sins, and yet wish for his touch and his scent and his name? Ach, shall you flaunt your form for him, walk bare for him, allow him to rut you — to plough you, again and again — before all our kin?"

Oh. Louisa swallowed hard, as more shock and disbelief swirled through her chest, choked at her throat. Because if that was what was expected of a true orc's mate, then — no. She couldn't. She couldn't leave her lands. She couldn't abandon her staff and the children. And gods, she'd barely been able to handle being naked with Killik and Ulfarr in an otherwise empty hayloft, let alone in front of other people, and…

Killiklaughed again, so sharp and bitter, and he brought up his gleaming dagger, and gently tapped it at Louisa's cheek. "No," he said, cold. "No, you shall not. And thus" — another bitter laugh, another tap of the dagger to her cheek — "as I told you from the start, this is only ten nights. This is only pleasure. This is not you coming to Wolf's home, and play-acting as his mate, and then leaving him! This is not you bringing the shamed Wolf of the Skai yet more pain, and more grief, before all his kin! Before his son!"

Godsdamn it. Louisa rubbed hard at her eyes, shaking her head, but Killik's words kept ringing, swinging into a distant, miserable kind of sense. He didn't want to hurt Ulfarr. He didn't want to add to Ulfarr's pain and grief. So he'd created these boundaries, set this time limit, to protect not only Ulfarr's heart, but his name. His reputation. Maybe even his relationship with their son.

"So why did you even bother?" Louisa demanded, her voice a rasp. "If this was so damned risky for you — that a day's visit to the camp on my own fucking land ruins all your grand plans — why did you even come to me with your deal! Why even start this mess in the first place!"

Killik'sgrowl bellowed through her chest, thudded through her aching skull. "I told you this again and again, woman!" he hissed. "Because he longs for this! Because this helps him! Because it seems he is now himself enough to fetch you alone, and show you our camp, and seek to plough you in our common-room! And ach, I wish to help him learn this, I wish to grant him pleasure and strength and peace! I wish to see him happy, and alive!"

Hewas gasping by the end of it, his eyes frenzied, his breath hot and sweet in Louisa's face. And his dagger had somehow slid down to her throat, and when had that happened, and why hadn't she even noticed. Why was she still looking at him, raising her chin, daring him to do it…

"And you really think this made him happy, just now?" she bit out. "With you yelling at him, and mocking him, and threatening him like this? Threateningme like this?"

Hervoice hitched, her throat convulsing against the cold steel of that dagger. And there was a moment's frozen, halting stillness, Killik's eyes flashing again, his lip curling, as if…

"Gods, Killik, you obviously adore him," she said. "So why can't you just show him? Why can't you just be honest with him? Why do you need to play these games, and fuck around on him and hurt him like this? It seems to me" — she swallowed, drew in more breath — "like maybe you don't want to stand tall with the shamed Wolf of the Skai. Maybeyou aren't willing to make that kind of sacrifice for him, either."

Killikhad gone still by the end of it, his eyes boring into hers, and she drew up straighter, drew in a deep breath. "And until you sort out your mess, and your ghastly temper," she hissed, "I'm staying the hell out of this. I'm staying the hell away from you."

Anddid she mean it, gods, yes, she meant it, the certainty sharp in her voice, striking strong and deep through her body. "Please tell UlfarrI'm sorry," she said. "And that I had a lovely time today. And if you can ever stop threatening to murder the people you invited into his bed, I'll be very happy to see him again!"

Killikbetrayed a faint flinch, his eyes flicking down to the dagger he was still holding at Louisa's throat — and he abruptly lowered it, curling it into his fist. But it was too late, too late, and Louisa even laughed as she shook her head, and spat on the floor at his feet.

"But we both know you won't change either, you prick," she snarled. "So goodbye. For good."