Chapter Four

I stood in a damp room shrouded in darkness. I could feel the floor beneath me and sense the walls boxing me in, but I saw nothing. An eerie silence sent a shiver down my spine. Immediately, panic swelled within me, though I wasn't sure where it had come from. It didn't feel like my own.

I cast a witch light, and I found myself standing in a long hall with a concrete floor and stone walls. Several doorways stood in front of me, and I wasn't sure which to investigate first. I didn't know what it all meant.

As I took a step to the closest doorway, I heard a whimpered cry come from down the hall. It was almost indiscernible, but it was hard to miss in the silence. My gaze locked on the door at the end of the hall, where I thought the sound had come from.

Slowly, I tiptoed toward the door. My heart beat wildly in my chest, and my hand shook as I reached out for the doorknob. I hesitated before my fingers connected with the handle.

I eyed the door, then slowly pressed my ear to the wood. My heart leapt into my throat as a shrill cry tore through the darkness.

Then everything disappeared.

* * *

I startled awake,and Isa mewed as I nearly kicked her off the bed. Lucas stirred beside me, and the details of the dream began to slip away as my heart rate slowed. I tried to grasp on to the fading memory, but the dream eluded me more and more each moment.

It wasn't unusual for any of us to face bad dreams these days. Weeks had passed since we'd visited Hok'evale, and Hattie was still working out details with her contact in Malovia. Things were quiet here, and life had been peaceful the last six weeks. But far into the depths of my subconscious, I knew our time here was temporary, and I feared what we might face to obtain the Oaken Wands. My dreams merely reflected that unsettling worry I couldn't quite shake.

Lucas groaned as he reached for me, and I rolled over to snuggle into his arms. His lips brushed the skin beneath my ear. "Everything all right?"

I sank deeper into the mattress. "Everything's perfect."

It wasn't a lie, but it wasn't exactly the truth, either. We knew where to find the Mortana and Mentalist Wands, but we were no closer to finding a way into the Abyss, not until Hattie got a message through the Malovian borders. The fae were more cautious than ever, and Hattie's messenger had died before she was able to get her last message through. Her letter was intercepted, so we had to keep trying. There was nothing any of the rest of us could do to speed the process along, so we'd busied ourselves with wedding planning as a way to distract ourselves.

Our wedding was only two weeks away now. I prayed that we could hold on to these perfect moments for just a few weeks longer, at least until the wedding was over. I wasn't going to let the priestesses—or anyone else for that matter—ruin our special day.

Lucas placed a tender kiss on my lips, and my heart fluttered. That's what was perfect about all this. It was these little moments that nobody could take away from us. The priestesses could show up tomorrow and slaughter us on our own front steps, but they couldn't take away this moment in time when I woke in the arms of the man I loved.

I ran my fingers down the side of his face, taking in every detail of his features. "I wish I could freeze this moment, so we never had to leave this bed."

Lucas smirked. "If we were frozen, how would I ever do this?"

He rolled me over, then climbed on top of me to trail kisses down my neck. I could feel the hardness of his erection through the thin layers of fabric between us, and my thighs grew hot in wanting.

I snickered, and my hands slid down his body. "Keep kissing me, and you're going to get lucky."

He pressed a passionate kiss to my lips, then drew away with a smile. "I'm counting on it."

Just then, we heard footsteps outside the room, and Lucas and I both held our breath to listen. Grammy had walked in on us one too many times over the last few months that we were extra cautious about it. Our room had a lock, but still…

The footsteps faded down the hall, but the moment between us had already ended. I wanted to curse whoever had been out there.

Lucas sighed as he crawled off of me. "If we start now, your grandma's bound to interrupt. I can smell bacon. Whatever your grandma's up to, she wants us down for breakfast."

He wasn't wrong. The scents wafting up from the kitchen smelled delicious.

"She's just trying to put people in good spirits," I said. Hope was a good thing, because spirits hadn't been high around here lately. It's why we were still having the wedding despite being driven out of town. We needed hope, and there was no better way to foster it than bringing our friends together.

I dressed in a purple maxi dress with a warm black cardigan, then secured the old key Grammy had given me around my neck. I'd gifted it to Lucas, but he'd tried to give it back, and we'd resolved to share it.

We left our bedroom but stopped in the doorway when we saw a small package sitting outside our door. The box was a deep purple to match our wedding colors, and it was held closed by a teal ribbon. A note in Onyx's handwriting said, Open Me!

I exchanged a curious glance with Lucas. "What's this?"

"No idea, but I guess we're about to find out." He opened the package, and inside sat a piece of paper that had been rolled up like a scroll. I reached inside and unfurled it, then began reading.

You'll have plenty of time for just you two,

but you haven't yet said I do.

You're ours until that special day.

Your friends are just a few clues away.

One goes left, and one goes right.

You'll meet back up late tonight.

For the bride taking the groom's last name,

Don't peek outside or you've lost the game.

I smiled. "It's a scavenger hunt!"

"They're stealing you from me!" Lucas protested playfully.

"You'll get me back tonight," I teased.

"They better bring you back in one piece," he joked.

I sucked a breath. "I don't know. We're walking into danger here."

Lucas tapped his chin. "I guess we're just going to have to take a risk."

"I'm the one with rules," I said, waving the paper at him. "The only question is, which one of us goes where?"

Isa and Oliver pushed past us, and Isa turned the hall to the right. She started meowing, while Oliver went for the stairs.

"I guess that answers that question," Lucas said. "Have fun." He placed a kiss on my lips, and we went our separate ways.

I followed Isa and found another box sitting at the end of the hall. I opened the box and jumped when a spell like fireworks erupted out of the box. White sparkling lights exploded above my head and rained down on me. A magical tune of celebration sang from somewhere inside the box. I laughed as I pulled the scroll out and began to read it.

Congratulations, Nadine. You found your first clue.

The second one may be a challenge for you.

Downstairs and through a door is another clue,

If you want to have your cake and eat it, too!

I thought about it for a few moments, but I wasn't sure what door Onyx was talking about. I figured the cake had to mean something, so I went downstairs to the kitchen. I noticed all the windows in the house were covered by curtains. They were really serious about me not peeking outside.

In the kitchen, I started opening the cabinet doors, but I didn't find any clue box. I checked the pantry, but still nothing.

I read over the clue again, tapping my foot. "Mm, Isa. You'd think the cake would be a clue to the kitchen, right? Or maybe the dining room…"

I trailed off as my eyes landed on the oven. "I've got it!"

I opened the oven door, and victory surged through me when I found a cupcake sitting inside. It was decorated in purple frosting with teal sprinkles. I withdrew it from the oven and turned it around, looking for clues, but I didn't find any writing on it. I peeled back the cupcake liner, thinking I'd find a clue inside, but there was nothing there, either. It was obvious what I had to do.

I bit into the cupcake, and the most glorious spell overtook my whole body. Joy filled my chest, and a tingling sensation made me feel as if I was floating several inches off the ground. The euphoria made me giddy. I closed my eyes to take it in.

The spell lasted only a few seconds, before I felt my feet against the solid ground again. I opened my eyes to see a piece of paper sticking out of the cupcake. I pulled it out and cleaned it off, then unfurled the paper.

We knew you could do it.

You're so very clever.

The third clue is hidden

Where you'd feel better.

I had to think about this one for a minute, until I realized it could only mean the medicine cabinet in the bathroom. I went to the bathroom, where I found a cauldron sitting on the counter. A shimmering purple liquid swirled inside the pot, and a teal vial sat beside it.

I clicked my tongue. "Oh, Onyx, you're making this too easy."

I poured the teal liquid into the purple potion, and a message in a small bottle floated to the top, bobbing along the surface. I pulled the bottle from the cauldron and tipped the scroll into my hands.

You're getting so close!

Just one clue more.

You'll find it on blades?—

not one, but four."

I furrowed my brow. "Four blades. That's oddly specific."

I went back into the kitchen and looked around the knife block, but there were no clues hidden anywhere near it. I checked the silverware drawer, but still nothing.

"Blades…" I said thoughtfully. "It must be talking about knives, right, Isa?"

I looked down at my cat, but she looked as clueless as I was. "Except there are twelve knives in the knife block, and more than four in the drawer. Where else do we keep knives…? Unless it isn't about knives at all. It says on blades, rather than near them. What else has blades? A wand, maybe…"

Then it hit me. I went into the den, where a fan with four blades hung from the ceiling. I flipped the switch on the wall, and the fan started to spin. To my surprise, feathers exploded out of the ceiling, as if from out of nowhere, raining down on me. I laughed as the feathers tickled my skin. I looked upward, and my eyes caught sight of a piece of paper fluttering downward with the feathers. I reached out to grab it and caught the clue in my fingertips.

"Damn, Onyx," I said with a smirk. "That was a good one."

You figured it out!

Just one step more.

The final surprise

is through the glass door.

"Come on, Isa." I cocked my head. There was only one glass door the clue could be referring to, and now it made sense why all the windows were covered by curtains. Isa followed me to the patio door, and we stepped outside.

"Surprise!" a chorus of female voices shouted.

The girls all sat around the patio table, where a full breakfast had been laid out for us. It was a warm autumn morning, and the trees surrounding us were all shades of oranges, reds, and yellows. Purple and teal streamers hung from the furniture and danced in the breeze.

Talia checked her phone. "Three minutes and fifty-two seconds," she announced. "Who was closest without going over?"

Grammy raised her hand. "I bet three forty-five."

"That makes Helena the first prize-winner of the day," Talia said. She conjured a gift bag and gave it to Grammy. Grammy pulled out a small bottle of maple syrup.

I placed my hands on my hips. "What's going on here?"

"Your bridal shower, of course." Chloe rolled her eyes, but she wore a playful smile.

"Did you guys place bets on how fast I could find the clues?" I asked.

"Yes, and I underestimated you," Talia admitted. "I said four-fifteen."

"I wasn't sure how long it'd take you on that last one," Onyx added.

"It was a good one," I told her as I took the empty seat at the head of the table. "You did a great job setting it up."

"We have a whole day of fun planned," Chloe raved. "But first, I'm starving."

Grammy had prepared a feast. I started with two pancakes and passed them around the table. Talia kept shoving more and more plates of food at me until my own plate was so full I couldn't find room for any more. Along with the pancakes, Grammy had prepared French toast, bacon, three types of eggs, hash browns, sausage, fruit salad, and muffins. It was like every breakfast food imaginable had been placed on this table.

"Wow, Grammy," I said. "You really went all-out."

"I wanted to give you options," she replied. "When you were a kid, you were a very picky eater. I remember Christmas Eve when you were seven years old, and you wouldn't eat anything except for peppermint candy canes."

I laughed. "That can't be true."

"It is!" Grammy cried. "Your mom begged me to pull off some culinary alchemy magic. I turned those mashed potatoes into peppermint candy canes—all the taste of candy but the nutrition of vegetables. You wouldn't believe how fast you ate those up."

"You did not!" I chuckled.

"I swear it," Grammy promised.

"It's true," Verla added. "I remember your mother telling me about it."

Grammy kept telling stories about my childhood, and everyone was laughing. They all seemed to be having a really good time, and I couldn't remember the last time I laughed this much.

Even the cats seemed to be in good spirits. They ate, then started chasing each other around the patio.

I was stuffed by the time Grammy finally stood and said, "Well, these plates aren't going to clean themselves."

"I don't know about you, but mine has no problems," Chloe joked as her plate rose into the air. She used her telekinesis to open the patio door and float her plate inside.

"Then you can help me wash the dishes," Grammy suggested.

Everyone helped clean up, and within a few minutes, the dishes were clean and the table was washed down. We gathered in the living room, where a warm fire flickered in the fireplace.

Chloe stood in front of everyone with a stack of papers in her hands. "Helena has given us the run-down of Nadine's childhood, but this wouldn't be a bridal shower if we left the groom out of it. So we're going to play some games?—"

Kaboom!

I startled, and Isa jumped into my lap. "What the hell was that!?"

Verla waved her hand. "The boys. Jonathan warned us it might get a little loud."

"Professor Warren is blowing stuff up?" I demanded.

Verla shrugged, like she expected this from him. "He calls it target practice."

"We're not going to let some boys ruin our relaxing day." Chloe stomped over to the patio door and leaned out to shout, "HEY! WOULD YOU KEEP IT DOWN OUT THERE!?"

"Sorry!" I heard Miles shout in the distance, before another explosion went off.

Chloe rolled her eyes, then proceeded to pass out cards. It was a game that asked questions about the bride and groom, and the guests were supposed to guess the answers. I filled out my sheet with the real answers so that Chloe had an answer key.

Apparently, Chloe had filmed Lucas giving his answers beforehand, and she put the video up on the TV for us all to watch.

"Who said I love you first?" Chloe asked in the video.

"I did," Lucas answered.

"Wait, no!" I protested. "That's not true. I said I love you first."

Chloe paused the video. "Now I have to hear this story."

"It was the night of my Evoking Ceremony, after Lucas saved me from that reaper. He's like, Why'd you do that? And I'm like, Don't you get it, you fool? I love you."

"That's not the story he told me," Chloe said. "Look."

She played the video again, and Lucas kept talking. "It was the night of her Evoking Ceremony, after I saved her from a reaper. Right before I put her soul back in her body, I told her I loved her."

"That doesn't count," I insisted with a laugh. "I wasn't conscious."

We all had a good laugh, and I recounted other stories about our relationship as we went through the questions. It was a lot of fun.

Talia had brought a wedding-themed tarot deck, and we all took turns giving each other readings. Talia drew for my future with Lucas, and it was no surprise that she pulled The Lovers card, which depicted a bride and groom at the altar. The Lovers was a card of harmony and meaningful relationships. It was certainly a good sign for our relationship.

Finally, Chloe wheeled out a cart full of liquor and fruit juices, and we broke into teams to compete on who could brew the best wedding cocktail. Verla and I teamed up, and since I didn't drink alcohol, we used a shot of Grant's Fizzy Bubbly he brewed last week. It was a potion he'd come up with designed to keep his blood sugar from spiking. It was alcohol-free, but whatever spell he'd put on it still made a person tipsy. Verla and I won by mixing it with cranberry and orange juice.

We lounged on the couches in the living room, sipping our cocktails and laughing.

"If you'll all turn your attention to our cats, I believe they have prepared some entertainment," Chloe announced.

Verla stood, and when she cleared her throat, the cats came running. "Places everyone."

Verla pressed a button on the TV remote, and a slow wedding song came over the speakers. The cats began to spin around each other in a coordinated motion, like they were ballroom dancing. Then the beat changed, becoming more upbeat. The cats joined in a center circle, then jumped outward in sync. They spun around like they were chasing their tails, then rolled over on their bellies. It was beautifully in sync and fun to watch. We all applauded when they finished.

"Good kitties!" Verla praised as she tossed them all treats.

"I think it's time for presents!" Onyx exclaimed.

All around the room, people conjured their gifts. I was overwhelmed by how many packages there were.

"Open mine first!" Chloe said, shoving a package in my direction.

I sat straighter on the couch and set my drink on the end table. I tore open the wrapping paper and found a white candle inside. Mine and Lucas's name were etched on the candle, along with our wedding date.

"It's a wedding candle for relationship rituals," Chloe said. "You and Lucas can use it in your spellwork. Miles and I made it at a shop in Hok'evale."

"That's really thoughtful," I told her. "Thank you, Chloe."

I unwrapped Onyx's present next and found a box full of all kinds of amethyst crystals. Some of them were raw stone, while others were cut to points. I could feel the alchemy magic pulsing off of them.

I laughed. "You know me too well."

Onyx chucked. "I figured you could have fun brewing potions."

Onyx knew I'd been using Alchemy crystals in class when I was pretending to be an Alchemist. She charged up the crystals with her magic so I could use them to brew potions.

"I love it, Onyx." I set the crystals aside and started opening her next present. I stilled when I saw the next gift she'd given me. It was a leather-bound book, and when I opened it, I found handwritten instructions for love potions. It was incredible. It came in a box with a few herbs to accompany some of the potions.

"These are the best potions I could find for relationships," Onyx said. "The first one is an aphrodisiac brew for your wedding night."

"Ooh, I'm making that for sure. Is it safe for my body?" I asked.

"It's totally safe for everyone," she confirmed. "It's even approved for pregnant women."

"Thank you, Onyx." I leaned over to give her a hug.

Verla went next, and she handed me a small box wrapped in blue foil. Inside sat a beautiful hairpin with blue stones in it.

"It's your something old, something borrowed, and something blue—symbols of good luck for a bride on her wedding day," Verla told me. "It was my grandmother's. I lent it to your mother when she got married."

I went speechless. "My mom wore this to her wedding?"

Verla nodded. "Yes. And I think she'd want you to wear it, too."

I couldn't help it when I started tearing up. I didn't have a lot left of my mom. Most of my mementos had been destroyed in the fire at Grammy's house. I still had a small box I'd rescued from my dorm room that I kept in my stash, but that was it. I knew technically this hair pin didn't belong to my mom, but she had a connection to it, and that made it really special. I couldn't believe I'd get to wear the same hair pin on my wedding day as my mother did.

"Thank you so much," I told Verla, before crossing the room to pull her into a hug. I choked up and couldn't find the words to tell her just how much this meant to me. My own mother wasn't here, but Verla had brought a piece of her to this party, and I couldn't be more grateful. I knew my parents were gone, and they weren't coming back in the same way they'd been here before. I'd said goodbye to them long ago, but I still wished they could've made it to this wedding. I didn't think Verla realized it, but she was the family I needed when my own wasn't here.

I pulled away and sniffled, then bent to show Isa. "Hear that, Isa? It's the hairpin you wore in your last life."

Isa sniffed it, then rubbed her head against my hand. She wouldn't remember, because even though she was my mother reincarnated, she didn't keep her memories from her past life.

I returned to my spot on the couch, and Grammy handed me her present. Inside the box was a crocheted blanket made of purple and teal yarn. I pulled it out and held it up. "Grammy, this is gorgeous! Hold on, this looks familiar… You said you were making this for the nursing home!"

"Well, I made some blankets for the nursing home, but you seemed to like this one so well," Grammy said. "Did you know that in the Miriamic Coven, purple symbolizes spiritual connection and teal symbolizes peace?"

"I knew about purple, but not about the teal. I love the colors together." I pulled the blanket close and inhaled the scent. It smelled just like Grammy. "This is perfect. I love it."

Talia was last, and she had two large packages for me. I opened the first one, and it was filled with all kinds of spa treatments—Epsom salts, face masks, lotion, teas, and more.

"This is for the morning of the wedding," Talia said. "We're treating you to a whole spa day before you walk down the aisle."

"That's so thoughtful," I told her.

"And this one is for after the ceremony," she said, handing me the next box.

I furrowed my brow, because I wasn't quite sure what she meant. When I opened the box, I slammed it shut immediately.

"Holy fuck, Talia!" I cried. "My grandmother is here!"

Talia snickered. "Hey, I didn't pull this off alone. Helena made a few suggestions."

"We all pitched in," Chloe added, practically bouncing in her seat.

"What is it?" Verla asked curiously. Verla clearly hadn't been in on the joke, because she genuinely had no idea.

I blushed and sheepishly opened the box again. I pulled out a vibrator, still in the package, and held it up for everyone to see. "Sex toys. A lot of them."

"Oh…" Verla's eyebrows shot up, and she took a long sip of her cocktail.

I pulled toys out of the box and set them aside. There were so many—nipple clamps, a butt plug, and a feather on the end of a stick. Talia had even included a white lace one-piece with a slit in the crotch for easy access.

There was something that looked like a large flashlight. I didn't realize what it was at first, until I accidentally pressed a button on the side and it started vibrating.

"You guys!" I cried.

"What's the problem?" Talia asked. "Toys are really fun!"

"Lucas doesn't not need one of these," I said. "That's what I'm here for."

Chloe just about died laughing.

That wasn't all of it, either. There were all kinds of massage oils and lubricants for different parts of the body. I didn't want to know how much they spent on all this.

I set the box aside. "You guys really went all out on the gag gift."

"Someone had to!" Talia nearly died laughing. "It was totally worth it to see the look on your face."

"I have no shame," I told her, but it was a little weird with Grammy and Verla in the room. Neither of them showed any indication of what they thought of this, but my cheeks still flamed.

"Now that presents are over, it's time for our final game…" Talia conjured a basket and handed it to me. "We wrote down some memories we have with you and put them into the basket. You read them out loud, and we'll guess who wrote them!"

"This is a neat idea. Let's see…" I picked out one of the sheets of paper and began reading. "I remember the first day I met Nadine. Helena must've shoved a hundred condoms into her hands and told her to stay safe in college."

I burst into laughter.

"That one is Talia's!" Grammy cried, pointing to my best friend.

"Hey, you're the one who tainted her first impression," Talia laughed.

"I just wanted her to be safe!" Grammy defended.

"You know the school supplied those for free, right?" Verla told her.

"What if the health services center ran out?" Grammy asked.

"Believe me, Grammy, I did not run out," I said, before picking up another piece of paper. "I remember finding a box of condoms in Nadine's room—you guys! Is this all you think about?"

"Apparently," Talia snickered. "That one has to be Chloe. She broke into our room Freshman year."

Chloe cringed. "Sorry about that. But it makes for a good story, right?"

"Yeah, because you're my excuse when I say I didn't run out, because my condom box was sabotaged!" I joked. "You're forgiven, Chloe."

I kept pulling memories from the basket. A lot of them were funny, but most of them were really sweet. My heart felt full the more I read.

"I remember Nadine decorated an ice cream cake for my birthday. She accidentally left it next to the stove, and it melted." I read the last paper aloud, smiling lightly.

"That's got to be Talia's," Onyx guessed.

"It wasn't me," Talia said. "I'm guessing Helena."

Grammy smiled proudly. "Yep. It was my sixtieth birthday, and she was only ten years old. I don't blame her for leaving the cake out. She gets points for effort."

I stood. "I think I might be able to make it up to you, Grammy. Hold on."

I'd had this planned for a while. I knew it was my special day, but Grammy was turning seventy tomorrow. She insisted she didn't want a party when we'd celebrated Grant's birthday last weekend, but I wanted to do something special for her regardless.

I opened the freezer and pulled out an ice cream cake, then grabbed two candles I'd stashed in the back of a cupboard. I found a box of matches and lit them, then returned to the living room.

"Happy birthday!" I exclaimed.

The room burst into song, and Grammy threw her hands over her mouth. "Oh, Nadine! You didn't have to."

"No, I didn't, but I wanted to," I said. Lucas and I made a run to Hok'evale a few days ago to refill my prescriptions, and we'd picked up the cake while we were gone.

I set the cake on the coffee table in front of Grammy. She grabbed my hand and squeezed it. "That's so sweet of you. Thank you."

Grammy blew out her candles, and we all cheered.

I had the best time laughing and chatting with my friends. We spent the rest of the day playing games, doing puzzles, and snacking on leftovers from breakfast. It was the most fun I'd had in a long time.

I joined Grammy in the kitchen that night to help her wash dishes. The other women were still chatting in the living room, and the guys hadn't come in from outside yet. I listened to my friends' laughter as I scrubbed cocktail glasses in the sink.

"Is everything all right, Nadine?" Grammy asked. "You're awfully quiet."

I wasn't quite aware of the thoughts going through my head until Grammy brought attention to them. I noticed the rocks settling in my gut. I wasn't ready for this day to end.

I set a glass on the drying rack and sighed. "I had the best day with you, but I feel like I'm waiting for the other shoe to drop. It seems that any time something good happens, something bad has to come along to even out the scales."

"I don't believe in that nonsense," Grammy said as she dried the dishes.

"I don't want to believe it, but it feels true," I admitted. "Lucas and I won our trial, but Everly died. This kind of stuff happens to us all the time."

"That doesn't mean the events are tied together by cosmic forces," Grammy stated. "Perhaps good and bad things just happen, and one doesn't depend on the other. It's okay for good things to exist independently."

Verla's laughter rang from the other room, and I looked over to see her clutching her stomach.

Grammy noticed me watching her. "Clarice has changed since your mother died. There's a light that has left her eyes, but she's still able to find the good in things. Trauma changes people, but we can still find joy after the fact."

I nodded along, but I didn't say anything as I thought about what she said.

"The last thing I want is for you to get hurt, but I can't go back and change the past," Grammy said. "I wish I could have protected you, but all we can do is look toward the future."

"You tried," I told her as I reached for the key around my neck. "You gave me this key to protect us, but I don't think it has. We've all been through so much. What is this key, really?"

She shook her head. "I don't really know, to be honest. Your grandfather gave it to me before he died, and he said it was very important. Perhaps it was never meant for me or you."

"Then who's it for?" I wondered.

"I'm not sure, but we best hold on to it for now," Grammy said. "In the meantime, enjoy what you have. You are surrounded by friends and family who love you very much, and we will always be there for you."

I set the last glass in the drying rack. "Thank you, Grammy."

The patio door opened, and the guys' laughter filled the house. I dried my hands and returned to the living room. Lucas was laughing so hard that his eyes crinkled at the corners, and it made me forget what Grammy and I had been talking about. He looked so happy and carefree.

"Looks like you ladies had a blast," Grant said as he stood in front of the pile of presents. "What'd Nadine get?"

He reached for the box of sex toys, and I nearly jumped out of my skin as I raced across the room to slam the top shut. "Nothing!"

"Ooh," Grant sang. "It's that kind of gift."

"Lucas," I said quickly. "Could you help me carry all this up to our room?"

It was funny when the girls made me open the gag gift, but I did not need to be showing off sex toys to Professor Warren. I think I'd die.

"Sure." Lucas approached me nonchalantly. I didn't think he'd realized what was in the box.

Talia nudged me as I passed her. "Have fun."

I shot her a nervous smile. I'd been in the mood this morning, but now my friends' teasing had ruined that for sure. Lucas and I went up to our room, and I locked the door behind us.

"What was all that about?" he asked as he set the box on the bed. "You were acting like—oh."

Lucas opened the box, and his eyebrows shot up. "Oh. Wow, that's uh… a big dildo."

"It wasn't my idea," I said quickly, wringing my hands together.

Lucas eyed me curiously. "You're acting strange. What's going on?"

I shot a glance toward the door, even though everyone else was downstairs. "I know the toys are a gag gift and I'm supposed to laugh at it, but I don't get why they'd spend all this money on this stuff if they didn't expect us to actually use them. But don't toys seem… a bit much? I'm happy with our sex as it is."

Lucas wrapped me in his arms and held me close. "Nad, we don't have to use them if you don't want to—not now or ever. I don't want you to feel like you have to just because they're there."

"It's just… I would never want you to think you aren't enough for me," I told him. "We don't need the toys."

"Fair enough." Lucas drew away, then he closed up the box and slid it under the bed. "It's like they were never here to begin with."

"Thanks," I told him as we curled up together on the bed. Lucas took me in his arms, and though neither of us made a move to take things further, I felt intimately connected with him anyway. All the tension in my body melted away. "This feels really good."

"I'm glad you're happy," Lucas whispered.

"I am. I had a really good day." I rolled onto my side to look at him. "How was your day?"

Lucas roamed his hands over my body, but he was gentle about it, admiring me more than anything. "It was good. Hardly anyone died."

I rolled my eyes. "You say that very nonchalantly."

Lucas shrugged. "I listen to people die every day. Some days are darker than others. Today was better—natural deaths only."

"That's good," I said. "How was your bachelor party?"

"It was fun. We drank beer and blew shit up. Professor Warren used containers from the recycling to make targets in the yard, and we shot them with our magic. Grant helped make some potions that made soda bottles explode like rockets. I think we got one to fly at least a hundred feet in the air."

Lucas's hands traveled over the scars on my legs, and his lips turned down at the corners.

I stiffened. "What's wrong?"

He traced my scars with his finger. They were lighter in color now, but still discernible up close. "We've been through so much. I wish we could be this happy forever."

"We will be," I said, but I think we both felt the hollowness of the promise. We couldn't be sure, not until this conflict was over. I quickly added, "At least for now, we have a wedding to look forward to. I want to make the most of it."

"I do, too," Lucas agreed, before placing a kiss on my forehead. "No matter what's happening in the world around us, you never fail to make me happy. And that, Nad, is exactly why I asked you to marry me."

I could tell his words were honest, but I sensed uncertainty, too. I didn't think he was afraid to marry me, but it was more like something was missing. I'd felt it all day and knew exactly how he felt. We were about to join ourselves in marriage, and that was a commitment great enough to rearrange the cosmos. It was something everyone we loved should be here for, but they wouldn't get the chance. My mother should've been here today to celebrate my bridal shower, and my dad should be preparing to walk me down the aisle, but they were both gone. Lucas's brother and his parents wouldn't be here, either. It was the melancholy side of an otherwise perfect union.

I was prepared to move forward with this wedding no matter what, because I'd been forced to keep going even when my loved ones could no longer walk beside me. I didn't know if Lucas was willing to do the same, but by the goddess, I hoped so.

I wanted to move forward, even if the family I'd once had wouldn't be here beside me to watch me do it. I wasn't sure if Lucas was ready to do the same.