Chapter 16

Chapter Sixteen

W hat is this that I am feeling? Frowning to himself as he entered the ballroom, James considered the present emotions swirling through his chest. There was not the anticipation of finding some beautiful young lady who he might pull into his arms, nor was there the hope of drinking the finest brandy and earning himself a nice pile of winnings. And yet, all the same, he felt… happy. Indeed, there was a joy within his heart that he could not quite explain, and he found himself at a loss as to why he could feel so much delight when he was going to indulge in none of what would otherwise have been his favorite pastimes.

His eyes flickered around the room as he walked, finding himself unwilling to stop and talk to anyone, though many greeted him. Yes, he nodded and smiled but he did not stop to talk, trying to understand this new state of both mind and heart. Was it simply because of Lady Prudence? Could his happiness really come from the connection between them which, through one simple yet honest conversation, had blossomed into something he had never experienced before?

A smile caught the edge of his lips, and he held his head a little higher, feeling himself thrilled at this new realization. At the same time, another thought came into his mind and his shoulders immediately dropped. He was, after all, still a rogue with a dreadful reputation, and why, then, should someone like him deserve a beautiful creature such as Lady Prudence? Surely there should be consequences for a fellow like him, the consequences being that he would never find someone who truly cared for him.

Though she has not admitted to such a thing as yet, James reminded himself, still frowning. However, I was certain that I saw something in her eyes and heard something in her voice which hinted at the same sort of feeling within my own heart.

That made him smile again, his heart quickening at the thought of seeing Lady Prudence again. He would not say anything to anyone as regards his intention to court her, not as yet, for there was still a conversation to have with Lord Kingshill. That, however, could be done tonight and, as he had said to Lady Prudence, he did not think there would be any difficulty there. Lord Kingshill could easily find another young lady to marry and produce the required heir though, this time, James was determined to have nothing to do with it. He had been dishonest once and he was not about to be so again. Not when he realized the injury that could be caused by it.

Besides which, he mused, his hands behind his back now as he walked, I am sure that Lord Kingshill will be able to find someone who is more than suitable for him and, mayhap, someone who is just like him in character. Someone who has no interest in sharing their life with him, someone who would rather keep him at arm's length. Yes, there certainly must be some young lady like that!

"Childers, good evening."

James turned as a heavy hand settled on his shoulder.

"Kingshill!" he exclaimed, a broad smile on his face. "I was just thinking of you."

His friend lifted an eyebrow.

"All good, I promise."

"That is good." Lord Kingshill lifted his half-filled brandy glass. "This is exceptional brandy, I must say."

James rolled his eyes.

"The ball has not even properly begun, and you are half in your cups already!"

"But it is such fine brandy!"

With a laugh, James slapped his friend hard on the back, then tilted his head.

"There is something I should like to discuss with you, however, before you become too inebriated. Might you be able to spare me a few minutes?"

Lord Kingshill frowned.

"If you are going to give me another lecture on how I ought to be doing this or that before I make my announcement, then I have no time nor inclination to listen to it."

James grinned.

"It is not that, I assure you. Rather, it is something of the opposite, though not entirely."

His friend's eyebrows lifted.

"Well, now I am intrigued!" He threw back the rest of his brandy and, smacking his lips, looked at James. "What is it?"

"Well, I should like to talk to you about Lady Prudence." A knot tied itself in his stomach as he spoke, but he kept his gaze steady. "Something has happened, and I should like to… well, I do not think that you should proceed with your betrothal."

The grin on his friend's face began to fade.

"Whatever do you mean by that? Is there something wrong with the lady? Have you discovered something about her which will not suit?"

James shook his head.

"No, no, nothing like that. However, I have considered that, while the match may be suitable for you, it is certainly not suitable for her. Think about this, my dear friend. She wants nothing more than to have by her side a gentleman who cares for her, who will give her the attention and the affection that she so craves. Do you really believe that you can provide that?"

Lord Kingshill scoffed at once.

"Of course not! But then again, I should not even think to do such things as that."

"So you can see, then, that you are not well matched."

This brought a heavy line to his friend's forehead.

"But Lady Prudence will simply have to accept that from me. She will have to understand that there can be no connection between us in the way that she desires, that is all."

The way his friend spoke, so carelessly and without the least bit of consideration for Lady Prudence, made James' heart fill with anger, though he forced it to remain in the very depths of him so that it did not express itself either in word or in his expression.

"I do not think that she wishes for that sort of connection, Kingshill. Thus, the attachment cannot continue as anticipated."

Lord Kingshill blinked, his frown lifting.

"You mean to say that she will not proceed with this betrothal?"

James shook his head.

"No, she will not."

"But why? It is not as though she is going to be given any other gentleman's hand, is it? She is a wallflower, has been for some time, and as yet, has not garnered even the least bit of attention from anyone! Why then would she be so bold as to do this?"

The knot in James' stomach tightened but he did not hold himself back.

"Because she has received a better offer, my friend. An offer from a gentleman who has promised to be considerate, caring, and affectionate, which is just as she deserves."

Lord Kingshill snorted.

"Then she has received an offer from a pauper, I am sure. No gentleman of good standing would consider a wallflower, no matter how highly she is titled."

"He is not a pauper." James swallowed tightly, then lifted his chin. "My friend, I am the gentleman who has offered such a thing." His friend blinked furiously, his face paling as James swallowed the nervousness tightening his throat. "I may be just as much of a rogue as you, but I am determined to reform," he continued, before his friend could speak. "It may be the most astonishing thing you have heard, but I confess that I cannot help but care for the lady. I do not know what it is that has drawn me to her but, the more time that I have spent in her company, the more time I have wanted to spend there. She is a beautiful creature, her character remarkable, and her nature nothing but sweetness." Putting one hand to his heart, James inclined his head. "I am sorry to have stepped in where I ought not to have done, but as I have said, I could not help it. I had to be the one who came to stand by her side."

Lord Kingshill said nothing for some moments and then, much to James' astonishment, he began to laugh. The sound was cruel and hard as though he were mocking James for some reason, berating him for what he had chosen to do.

"You?" he asked, as James folded his arms over his chest, feeling a little irritated at his friend's response. " You , the scoundrel, the rake, the rogue… you are to marry Lady Prudence in my place… and she has accepted you?" He laughed again, though there was a darkness to his tone. "I cannot believe that."

"It is true," James insisted, firmly. "I cannot bear the thought of you taking the lady as your wife and then treating her as though she has no bearing upon your life, showing her no respect or consideration. My conscience will not permit it." Taking a deep breath, he dropped his hands. "And though I said I would assist you in finding a young lady to marry and provide you with the heir that you require, I am afraid that I cannot do so now."

"No?" Lord Kingshill's lips twisted. "No doubt your newfound conscience will not permit you to do such a thing?"

"Precisely." James drew himself up so he stood as tall as he could. "You may not believe me, you may mock and tease me, but I am determined to reform myself for her sake."

"And what if I refuse?"

James blinked.

"Refuse what?"

"Refuse to step away. Refuse to step back ."

Shrugging, James turned his face away.

"It does not matter," he answered, quietly. "The lady will not marry you, Kingshill. Her father and mother have been informed of the change and they have consented." He was not certain of this last statement as yet, but he spoke it with confidence regardless. He did not want to let Lord Kingshill have even the smallest amount of belief that Lady Prudence would be to him as he had previously anticipated. "That is all there is to it."

Lord Kingshill scowled, his eyes growing dark, his jaw jutting forward.

"You devil! First you promise to find me what I require, swearing to me that you will be of the greatest assistance, only to then turn your back on me and steal what I have for yourself!"

"It was not deliberately done," James answered, though Lord Kingshill's voice grew louder, his anger becoming more evident by the minute.

"Now you expect me to turn away from Lady Prudence, simply because you have decided that you want her more than I? And then, rather than attempt to make amends, you refuse to assist me any further! How dare you treat me in such a way?"

Seeing a few people around them begin to glance towards them, their eyes lit with curiosity, James began to back away, refusing to let any gossip come from this.

"I am sorry, my friend. Do excuse me."

"Sorry? Is that all you can say?"

"Gentlemen!"

James held both hands up as Lord Henstridge, the gentleman hosting the ball, came towards them.

"Forgive my friend, Lord Henstridge. He is a little in his cups and–"

"I am sober enough to tell you all, " Lord Kingshill interrupted, his voice growing even louder, "that I am courting Lady Prudence!"

Fear clutched at James' heart.

"You are mistaken!" he exclaimed, as a few of the other guests now gasped in shock at what was playing out before them. "I am betrothed to Lady Prudence and soon intend to marry her!" This brought yet more exclamations from the crowd who all either looked to each other or looked to James, Lord Kingshill or Lord Henstridge himself. James lifted his chin, silently challenging his friend but Lord Kingshill only sneered. " I am betrothed to Lady Prudence," James said again, only for Lord Kingshill to slice the air with his hand.

"No, I am the one betrothed to her!"

The crowd around them made so much noise at this remark that James was sure even the orchestra had stopped playing to listen to the conversation.

"There is only one way for us to sort this matter out, I believe," Lord Henstridge said, slowly, looking just as confused as the other guests around him. "We must find Lady Prudence and speak with her, and then, we will know the truth."

"Lady Prudence?" One of the ladies near him touched James' arm and, glancing at her, he nodded. The lady then exchanged a glance with her friend, her eyes wide with obvious surprise. "Goodness, I did not think that anyone would ever pursue that particular young lady after what she did!"

Fire tied itself around James' heart as questions began to fill his mind about what such a thing could be, only to then remind himself of all the many things he had done that had burned his reputation into nothing but ashes and smoke.

"Her reputation is far better than mine, I assure you," he said, turning and speaking directly to the lady, making her blush with embarrassment. "I care deeply for the lady and will be very glad when the wedding day is set."

"When my wedding day is set, you mean!" Lord Kingshill cried, catching everyone's attention. "You need not try to steal my betrothed from me, just as you have stolen coin and the like before! I am to marry the lady and you–"

"Let us go and find the lady," James interrupted, silently praying that Lady Prudence would forgive the interruption and, thereafter, answer in the affirmative that yes, she would marry him rather than Lord Kingshill. "That way, this matter can be settled for good."

Without waiting, he turned on his heel and began to stride across the room, his eyes searching desperately for the one lady he most wished to find. A glance over his shoulder told him that not only were Lord Kingshill and Lord Henstridge following, but so also was almost half the room! Chewing on the edge of his lip, James' heart began to beat a little more furiously as he searched for Lady Prudence. They had not discussed betrothal, only courtship, but there was no time for such things now. Would she accept him? Would she be willing to marry him? And, most of all, would she truly believe every single word of devotion and promise that he made?