Chapter 11

Chapter Eleven

P rudence sat quietly on the bench and looked out across the grounds. Lord Kingshill sat beside her, but though they had sat together for some minutes – and with her mother a short distance away – not a single word had been spoken between them.

"I – I know that this is all a little unusual," Prudence said, her stomach twisting as Lord Kingshill let out a long sigh. "We have not yet begun a proper courtship but–"

"You did speak to your father, did you not?" Lord Kingshill looked at her sharply, his eyes a little narrowed. "I do hope there is to be no difficulty there."

Prudence blinked, her fingers twisting together as she looked at Lord Kingshill, seeing how his jaw had tightened.

"There is no difficulty there, no, I assure you. My father is not particularly pleased, given your reputation, but the courtship can begin whenever you wish it."

She had spoken with her father and mother the previous evening, only a short time after she had witnessed Lord Childers attempting to pull a young lady into his arms. The pain that had shot through her upon witnessing such a thing had been so great that she had not been able to breathe for some moments. He had twisted about and walked away without a word, and she had also hurried across the room and as far from Lord Childers as she could, all the while berating herself for her foolish emotions.

Her decision had been made for her, she realized. Any sort of feelings she had for Lord Childers were worth nothing, for he did not care for her in the least. Charming and considerate he had appeared to be, but Prudence had let herself be captured by him, albeit just a little. Thus, in her embarrassment and shame, she had spoken to her parents and made it plain that yes, she did want to accept Lord Kingshill's offer of courtship. There had been much discussion but, in the end, Prudence had been given permission by her father to do as she had asked. He had expressed his discontent that Lord Kingshill had not come to speak to him personally, and Prudence had acknowledged that it had not been done properly.

That was all she had been able to say.

"I will tell the ton that we are courting this evening, I think." Lord Kingshill sniffed and then threw a glance at her. "There is no requirement for us to be seen together, however, not at balls and soirees or any other evening activity. I will call on you at times, however, to take tea and the like. And mayhap we should go out in the carriage so we can be seen, or a walk in the park as we have done today. But aside from that, I do not see any reason for us to be often in company."

Prudence's mouth went dry, and her heart began to pound. The gentleman had not asked her what she thought about such a thing but had, instead, simply told her that this was what was required and what she was expected to agree to.

"You do not want to spend time with me?" she asked, her voice a little hoarse. "I thought that, since we are looking to betrothal and marriage, you might be eager to do so."

Lord Kingshill chuckled, though the sound was not a pleasant one, making Prudence wince.

"My dear Lady Prudence, I do not think that there is any real reason for us to be very well acquainted, do you?"

"We… we are to be husband and wife," Prudence stammered, rather stunned by his response. "Do you not think that a good reason?"

With a shrug, Lord Kingshill let out a huff of breath.

"I do not think that is reason enough, no. From my point of view, a husband and his wife need not often be in company together and, besides which, you will soon have a son or daughter to care for." He looked at her properly then, a small smile on his face as though this was just what she ought to have expected from him. "I am sure that you are looking forward to being mistress of Kingshill Manor? You will have the entire house to manage, as well as your own quarters."

"My own quarters," Prudence repeated, a little breathlessly.

This, she realized, was Lord Kingshill's hope and expectation: that she would live with him but not be at all present beside him. Instead, they would live two very separate lives while sharing the same house and gardens. It was not at all the sort of life she expected and, were she to be honest with him, she would say that she was both disappointed and horrified to hear it.

"Well, I think I shall take my leave. Good afternoon, Lady Prudence."

Prudence's mouth fell open, her shock so great that she could not even find the words to respond. She stared at the retreating figure of Lord Kingshill, finding her heart aching terribly. The gentleman had not even the smallest consideration for her! He had not asked her if she had anything to speak of, had not asked her for her opinion on anything that he had said, and had made it quite clear that he had no interest in her company – and would not have any interest in the future either! Was that the life that she wanted? Was that the future she was destined for? To marry a gentleman who would not even look at her? Whose only interactions with her would be to visit her bedchamber in the hope of producing an heir?

"Goodness, did something happen?"

Prudence looked up as her mother approached, a little embarrassed at how swiftly Lord Kingshill had taken his leave.

"No, Mama."

"Then why did Lord Kingshill walk away so quickly?"

Not certain what to say – for she did not want to tell her mother the truth, given the shame that would then soon burn through her, Prudence offered a small smile.

"He had some business matters to attend to which were very urgent. This evening, he intends to announce to the ton that we have begun a courtship."

"I see." Lady Lymington did not appear to believe this excuse, given the way her eyebrows dropped and her lips flattened. "And what say you, my dear? Are you going to be content with that? Are you going to be glad when he begins to tell the gentlemen and ladies of the ton that you are now courting?"

Prudence tried to say yes, tried to tell her mother that this was what she wanted, but the ache in her throat grew and knotted until all she could do was force a smile. It was not one that her mother believed, however, for she sat down and immediately put one arm around Prudence's shoulders.

"My dear girl, you do not have to do this."

Closing her eyes, Prudence fought tears.

"I must," she whispered, unable to trust her voice. "I have no other choice."

"We may yet find someone else. We may find–"

"No, we will not." Prudence shook her head, dropping it forward. "Mama, if I want a family, even with a less than pleasing husband, then this is the only way. You know that there are no other gentlemen eager to pursue me. You can tell that there is no hope of me securing another match." The memory of seeing Lord Childers pursuing the young lady, showing himself to be the rogue that he had proclaimed himself to be, struck her hard and a fresh rush of upset filled her. Upset at herself, for having allowed any sort of feeling to build for Lord Childers and frustration at her foolishness. A tear fell to her cheek but, drawing in a deep breath, Prudence set her shoulders, refusing to let another one fall. "I will accept Lord Kingshill's courtship, knowing that the future will, I pray, bring me a home and children. That is a blessing that I will not gain any other way." She tried not to think about how such a thing would come about and all that she would have to endure, her chin wobbling as she forced a smile. "I am determined."

"Good evening."

Prudence turned, starting in surprise as Lord Childers bowed to her.

"Lord Childers." She put one hand to her heart instinctively, feeling it jumping wildly within her. "I – good evening."

She curtsied quickly, trying not to look into his face as she rose. Not knowing what else to say, Prudence kept her gaze on his shoulder, wondering what it was that he wished to say to her.

"Lady Prudence." Lord Childers hesitated, then cleared his throat gruffly. "Lady Prudence, I know that there was a little awkwardness before but–"

"Let us not speak of such things," Prudence interrupted quickly, still keeping her gaze on his shoulder. "There is no need to explain yourself. I am well aware of your reputation."

Lord Childers coughed this time, rubbing one hand over his hair.

"I – I am not certain that… well, if you do not wish to speak of it, then I shall respect that. Though I should like to beg your forgiveness for any embarrassment."

"There was none." Turning her head away, Prudence let herself look out at the ballroom, her hands clasping together in front of her, her fingers twisting just a little. "Pray excuse me, Lord Childers. This evening is rather significant, and I want to be prepared when Lord Kingshill comes to find me."

She felt rather than saw him step closer, his nearness to her sending a slight tremor up her spine. Berating herself for the feelings which then rushed back towards her heart, she steeled herself inwardly, trying to bring to mind what she had seen of him in pursuit of another young lady.

"You expect Lord Kingshill to announce your courtship this evening?"

Nodding, Prudence kept silent.

"Might I ask if you are a little anxious about it?"

She glanced at him, rather surprised at the question.

"A little."

She did not feel the need to tell him anymore, letting his gaze catch hers for just a moment before she looked away again.

"I hope that you will be happy." Without meaning to, without having had any intention of giving any reaction, Prudence found herself snorting in a most unladylike fashion before then covering her face with her hands, her shoulders rounding as heat poured into her face. After a moment or two of silence, she dropped her hands again but said nothing, refusing to look at him. Silently, she begged him to leave, but it seemed that Lord Kingshill did not hear her quiet hopes, instead moving a little closer so that they stood arm to arm. "I am sorry if there is something which has happened to upset you." He hesitated, then moved again so that he was looking at her a little more closely, his eyes searching her face, though Prudence could not seem to bring her gaze to his. "Lord Kingshill told me… well, that is to say that I thought he might be eager to reform himself after a particular conversation we had. Have you received something different from him?"

"I do not think that Lord Kingshill cares about what I think," Prudence found herself saying, uncertain as to why she was telling him this, but continuing regardless. "He has already decided what sort of marriage we shall have, and it is one where we are entirely separate." She shuddered, her eyes closing for a moment. "For the most part, at least." Lord Childers blew out a breath that brushed warmth across Prudence's cheek and when she opened her eyes to look at him, she saw nothing but a dark scowl across his face, as though he was truly frustrated by what she had told him. "This does not concern you, however," she continued, a little dully. "There is no need for you to consider anything I have said. You have made the arrangement for your friend and–"

"I do not want you to be unhappy."

Prudence gazed back at him, no longer struggling to look into his face.

"I do not believe that you have any requirement to be concerned for me, Lord Childers. Do you not have enough here in society to satisfy you? Do you not have enough to keep your mind… and your heart… occupied?"

He flushed then, clearly well aware of what it was that she spoke of.

"That does not mean that I cannot be concerned for you also, Lady Prudence. In fact, I swear to you now that I shall dedicate myself to making certain that all shall go well for you and that your happiness is made complete."

Prudence, a little surprised, kept her gaze steady as she looked at him.

"I do not know what you mean by that."

"I mean it as simply as it sounds," he replied, taking another step closer to her. "This was my suggestion, this was my doing as regards Lord Kingshill, and the arrangement between you. If my friend has now decided that he will not act in the manner that he ought to, then I will make it my sole purpose to ensure that things change in that regard. I will not look to my own entertainments, I will not focus on my own thoughts and determinations. Instead, I will be at Lord Kingshill's side, guiding and berating him if I must!"

A slight flicker of hope grew in Prudence's heart.

"You would berate your friend?"

"I would." Lord Childers offered her the smallest of smiles, though his gaze remained steady. "This was my doing, Lady Prudence, and I am determined that you should not suffer because of it. As I have said, I will give up all of my considerations and entertainments. You may find this difficult to believe, which I well understand given the fact that I am a gentleman with a dreadful reputation, but this is the only thing that I desire to do."

Not quite certain what to say, Prudence took a moment, her mouth going dry at the intensity of his gaze. All that she had felt before began to return to her heart with a swiftness that told her she had never really been free of it. She wanted to cry out in frustration, wanted to exclaim aloud that she was nothing but a fool but instead, she simply nodded.

"I would very much like to believe you, Lord Childers."

"I shall prove myself to you, Lady Prudence." Without warning, Lord Childers reached out and took her hand, bending over it before she had time to react. His breath ran hot on her skin, her whole body suddenly tingling with a strange awareness and a growing desire which she instantly tried to douse. "From this moment on, I am devoted to you."

Was it just her own mind, or did he take a little too long to release her hand? Prudence licked her lips, looking away as she fought to find words, her heart quickening in her chest, her skin burning.

"I – I thank you, Lord Childers."

"And now I shall take my leave of you, and go in search of Lord Kingshill," Lord Childers continued, looking away from her. "I must make certain that this announcement, if it is to be made, will be done properly. Do excuse me."

With a flash of a smile in her direction, Lord Childers hurried away at once, clearly determined to do just as he had said. Prudence watched after him, her heart already betraying her all over again.