Chapter 14

Chapter Fourteen

“ I t is not fair.”

Lillian’s petulant whisper went unnoticed, but that was nothing out of the ordinary. She was used to not being heard, and many times, she felt invisible. She utterly despised that feeling, and she hoped that it would soon come to an end. If she were to marry Lord Bertram, she would finally have the freedom to go where she pleased and spend time with whomever she wished. She was most certainly not a child, although her mother constantly treated her as such.

Despite not wanting to marry Lord Bertram, she would finally be acknowledged and would be left alone as well, without her mother there to hound her every day. Marriage now did not seem that terrible, although Lord Bertram was not the man she would have chosen as husband, if she had been permitted to make that decision herself.

She brushed her hair back from her temple as she sat in front of her chamber’s window, staring at the quiet and dark street below. She had not left her chambers the entire day, as her mother had scolded her at breakfast that morning. Not only had she been humiliated in front of her father and brother, but she was very upset that she was not to be permitted in the Duke’s presence or anywhere near him. Her mother had claimed to have had enough of her insolent behavior and had sent Lillian to the confines of her room. Lillian had not objected to that part in any manner, as she did not wish to be in her mother’s presence either.

A hint of a smile briefly appeared on her lips as she recalled the lovely dance that she and the Duke had shared at Lady Montague’s ball. Lillian had not enjoyed herself as much as she had that night in a very long while. Balls were no longer her favorite social events, and when she was forced to attend such an event, she would usually hide in a secluded corner until her mother dragged her away to meet another eligible bachelor who would not be impressed by her once she spoke.

It was not that Lillian was not well-spoken – instead, it was that she was too well-spoken at times, and her love for books and reading appeared to intimidate many suitors. It seemed that being a well-read woman was not desirable to men.

In an utterly frustrating turn of events, the only gentleman who was intrigued by her collection of books was the Duke, and Lillian was not allowed anywhere near him, as per her mother’s orders.

Lillian sighed wearily as she gazed at the dark street. Not a carriage passed by, and it felt to her that all of the people in London had disappeared, and she was the only person left. She had never felt more isolated and alone than she did in that moment, and it saddened her immensely.

Certainly, other young ladies did not feel the same way as she did. Most young ladies she noticed at balls and social events were excited by the prospect of marriage and were delighted when any suitor showed interest. Why did she not feel that way? Was there something wrong with her? Or was she destined to be alone? She did not wish to end up being left to look after her mother in her old age. She had neither the patience nor the stomach for that.

She shuddered at the thought and shook her head. The marriage mart was a terrifying place to her, and her stomach turned at the thought of marrying a man she did not love – yet that was exactly what she was considering, just to escape her current situation.

Love matches were very rare, according to her mother, although she had experienced it. Her mother enjoyed speaking, or rather boasting, of her love match. One would think that Lady Welsford would allow Lillian to find her own love match, but as Lillian approached her third year in the marriage mart, Lady Welsford’s patience had run out. Lady Welsford had found her match when she was eight-and-ten years old, and Lillian had now surpassed that age. Hence her mother’s urgency to have her marry.

Lillian’s thoughts were interrupted by a shadowy figure that crossed the street and walked straight to Welsford House’s front door. Her back straightened, and she squinted to see better. She could not, however, see the person’s face. All she was able to make out was that it was a man. She watched as the man approached the footman outside, and they exchanged words. Of course, there was no way of knowing what they spoke of. The cloaked man handed something to the footman and rushed across the street, disappearing into the shadows he had come from.

Secretly hoping that it was the Duke, Lillian rose from the window seat and quietly left her chambers. Her hand slid on the smooth wooden banister as she descended the stairwell.

She reached the bottom of the stairs, and as she approached the door, the butler came into view. Her heart jumped with fear, for she was convinced that her mother had instructed him not to allow her to move freely around the house, but he did not say anything to indicate that. He smiled politely at her, his eyes soft as they usually were.

“This came for you, Lady Lillian.”

Lillian’s brow furrowed as the butler handed her a sealed letter, and she took it hesitantly from him.

“Who is it from?” she whispered.

“I am not certain, Miss. The footman outside informed me of its delivery.”

Lillian bit her bottom lip and nodded.

“Thank you. And would it be too much to ask, for you not to mention this to my mother?”

The butler smiled reassuringly and nodded.

“You have my utmost discretion, my Lady.”

Lillian flashed him a grateful smile and quietly went back up the stairs.

Once in her chambers, she closed the door and stared at the letter. Was it from the Duke? Did he wish to express himself in a letter, as it was the only manner in which he was able to speak to her? Although even a letter was rather scandalous, from a man to an unmarried lady he was not even courting! Certainly, he realized that her mother did not want them to be anywhere near one another, and perhaps could not imagine any other way that they might communicate.

Her heart pounded in her chest as she held the letter in her hands and thought of what a romantic gesture that could be. Falling onto her bed, she broke the seal and unfolded the page with a smile. As soon as she read the words on the page, that smile faded, and her eyes widened. She sat upright on her bed and stared at the letter.

It was not a letter filled with flowery words and amorous wishes. It was threatening and terrifying, and Lillian dropped it onto the bed in front of her. She was not certain how she ought to react to this. Her heart pounded, but not in the way that it had before. She drew in a few deep breaths, attempting to work out whether she should take the words on the paper to heart, or ignore the letter. The words had a most ominous tone to them – they were, quite simply, an outright threat to ruin her reputation if she continued to assist the Duke in his attempts to unmask the author of the article.

Quivering with fear, she climbed off her bed and paced the room until she felt dizzy and rather worried. She did not intend to show this to her parents, as her mother would overreact in her usual way and might even put Lillian in a carriage and send her to live with her Aunt Claudia in the Welsh countryside. It had been quite late in the day when the letter was delivered, and now, she realized as she looked towards the window, it was completely dark outside. She must have been pacing for hours.

Lillian stopped pacing and dropped down to sit on her bed again, staring at the letter where it lay on the coverlet. She considered it carefully. She simply could not provide her mother with another excuse to direct her life. But equally, she could not deal with this alone – and as she also could not leave the house alone, she would need to either trust someone else in the house or wait until someone she trusted came to call. But she felt that, with this, time was of the essence. After careful contemplation, she decided to show the letter to the only person she trusted.

That would have to wait until the household was mostly asleep, so she took a deep breath to steady herself, carefully folded the letter, and slipped it into the small jewelry box that sat on her dressing table.

Not long after, a maid brought her a dinner tray, and as she settled to eat alone in her room, she was grateful for her mother’s harsh requirements – with that letter weighing on her mind, she could barely force herself to eat, and to have done so in the dining room with everyone else would have been impossible. Once she had eaten, she rang for the tray to be removed, and not long after that, she called for her maid to help her prepare for bed.

Then, once her maid had gone to her own bed, the minutes ticked by as Lillian waited, acutely aware of the quiet settling over the house as everyone went to bed. Only once she was sure that almost everyone would be asleep did she move. She folded her warm wrap around her, tucked the letter into its pockets, and left her chambers. Following the dark hallway, she was careful not to walk too loudly. Her mother was a light sleeper, and she certainly did not wish to wake her.

Lillian stopped in front of her brother’s door and softly knocked. Much to her relief, the door opened, and her brother stood in the doorway with a furrowed brow.

“Lillian, why are you still awake?”

“I must speak with you. It is of great importance.”

“It is past midnight. Can this not wait until morning?”

Lillian shook her head, and Timothy sighed. He stepped aside and allowed Lillian to enter.

“I do apologize if I woke you, Timothy,” she uttered, but as she entered, she noticed a candle burning on his writing desk and Timothy’s notebook lying open beside it. “But I now realize that you were awake.”

“I was making notes.”

“Of what?” Lillian inquired as she approached the desk.

“Nothing. It is not for your eyes,” Timothy answered and swiftly moved in front of the desk, preventing Lillian from seeing what he had written.

“That is not fair.”

“What is not fair is that you are knocking on my chamber door when it is past midnight,” he pointed out.

Lillian sighed and stepped away from him.

“I did apologize, but this cannot wait.”

She retrieved the letter from her pocket and handed it to Timothy.

“It is addressed to me.”

“I can see that.” Timothy pursed his lips and took the letter from her. He opened it, and immediately, his eyes widened as he read the threatening words. “What is this?”

“It is rather self-explanatory, brother.”

“Where did you get this, Lillian?”

“Please, try to keep your voice down,” Lillian hushed him. “It was delivered to our home late this afternoon.”

“By whom?”

“I am not certain. I only saw him fleetingly, from my window. I did not see his face, but I can assure you it was a man.”

Timothy stared incredulously at Lillian and shook his head.

“You do not think that this is the man who wrote those lies about Yarmouth, do you?”

“I do believe it is, and somehow, he is under the impression that I am assisting the Duke in revealing his identity.”

Timothy stared at Lillian with wide eyes.

“But how on Earth would he know this? No one knows that you offered your assistance to Yarmouth.”

“The writer of this letter does, and he is determined to ruin my reputation if I do not stop.”

Lillian sighed and sat on the edge of Timothy’s bed.

“You did not see his face?”

“No, I did not.”

Timothy’s brow furrowed, and he appeared perplexed.

“How did you see him?”

“I was in my room, sitting at my window. It was nearly dark outside, the street was quiet, and I was planning my escape,” Lillian joked.

“Now is not the time for humor.”

Lillian rolled her eyes and cleared her throat.

“I noticed a man walk directly to our door. He was dressed in black, and I was not able to see his face. Perhaps he wore a cloak. I am not quite certain. It was difficult to see clearly.”

“What did he do?”

“He spoke to our footman outside, and handed something to him. I decided to go downstairs, as I thought…”

Her voice trailed, and she lowered her gaze.

“You thought what?”

“I thought, or rather, I hoped, that it may have been the Duke who wrote me a letter as it would be the only way we could communicate with one another after the ball,” Lillian answered sheepishly. Timothy pursed his lips to suppress a smile, and much to Lillian’s relief, he did not respond. “The butler handed the letter to me, saying that it was for me, and I rushed upstairs to read it.”

“Thinking that it was from the Duke?”

Lillian stared at Timothy, unimpressed by his amused smile.

“Please, brother. Let us not get sidetracked by unimportant details.”

“It certainly does not seem unimportant to you. Are you fond of Yarmouth?”

Lillian did not appreciate her brother’s question, especially not at a time such as this.

“We have more pressing matters.”

“Avoidance is as clear an answer as any.”

“Please do not read too deeply into this. I was merely curious as to who was at our door.”

“And the footman did not see who it was?” Timothy inquired.

Lillian threw her hands up in the air.

“I did not inquire. I am not allowed outside, or did that detail slip your mind?”

“You are incredibly theatrical. Has anyone ever told you that?” he smirked.

“Timothy, concentrate, please. I have been threatened by the man who is set on ruining the Duke’s reputation, which he seems to have succeeded in doing with just one article. Can you imagine what he could do to my reputation or our family’s?” Lillian pleaded.

“I cannot allow this. We must show this letter to Father.”

“No,” Lillian gasped and rushed towards him. “Please, I beg you.”

Timothy was taken aback by Lillian’s pleas, not quite understanding why she did not wish to involve their father.

“Lillian, this is a serious matter, and it concerns me greatly. I would feel much more comfortable showing this to Father. He will know what to make of it, and take the necessary actions.”

Lillian clasped her hands together.

“Which will result in my imprisonment in this home, a chaperone at all times, as well as not being able to go anywhere without permission.”

“You exaggerate,” Timothy scoffed.

“You do not have any inkling of what this may do to me if Father and Mother know. Mother has already confined me to these walls and forbidden me to be anywhere near the Duke. I cannot bear any more restrictions on my life, Timothy. Please.”

“Mother is only doing her best to care for you. She has your best interests at heart.”

Lillian rolled her eyes and crossed her arms.

“She has her interests at heart, you mean.”

Timothy lowered the letter and gazed at his sister. He did not enjoy seeing his little sister in distress, and he realized that the only way to ease her worries was to comply with her request.

“I wish to make myself perfectly clear, sister. I will not inform Father or Mother of this letter, but if anything were to happen, or should you receive another letter, I must tell them.”

Lillian pursed her lips and clasped her hands together. She nodded and approached her brother.

“Agreed. Thank you, brother.”

Timothy held up the letter and looked at his sister.

“And I will keep this safe and away from Mother’s roaming eyes.”

“Will you inform the Duke of this?”

Timothy shifted his weight and nodded.

“It seems that there is no other way. He must be made aware of how urgent the matter is now.”

“Very well.”

“I will tell him, and together, we will find a solution. I promise you.”

Lillian worked her bottom lip and lowered her gaze. Despite speaking to her brother about her dilemma, she still felt uneasy. The writer of the article, who was intent on ruining the Duke’s reputation, had now set his sights on her. Terror filled her body, and she worried that she would not be able to keep her fear under control.

“I must go,” she said simply and turned away.

She walked to the door and, as she opened it, Timothy said her name.

“Lillian?”

She gazed at him over her shoulder, and he stepped closer.

“Please do not fret. All will be well. I will not allow any harm to come to you, and nor will Yarmouth. He is fond of you.”

Lillian nodded and quietly left her brother’s bedchamber. As she made her way through the hallway to her rooms, she could not entirely contain herself, and a smile appeared on her lips.

The Duke was fond of her, and that was more than enough reason to smile.