Chapter 13

Chapter Thirteen

A loud sigh escaped Samuel’s throat, and his brow furrowed, creating deep lines on his forehead.

His study was quiet and peaceful, precisely how he preferred it. Unfortunately, his mind was not peaceful. The turmoil inside him was alarmingly loud, and he could not shake the feeling of dread. Not only had he not been able to find the writer of the article which had shamed him for being a gambler who was in financial ruin, but he had also realized that he might be beginning to develop feelings for Lady Lillian.

At Lady Montague’s ball last evening, he had found comfort in her presence. They had shared a few moments of amusement; he had made her laugh, and he had very much enjoyed their spirited dance. Lady Lillian was a lovely young lady whose smile was radiant, and her presence made Samuel feel safe. That was a rather odd thing for him to feel. Usually, he would be the one who would help someone feel safe, but as he was shunned more and more by the members of the ton , she was the only one, apart from her brother, who did not turn her back on him.

Last evening, he had managed to find Lord Timothy amongst the guests after Lady Welsford had dragged Lady Lillian away, but he did not say much. They did not speak of the scene that Lady Welsford had made, despite her feeble attempts to go unnoticed. The guests, by contrast, had noticed it, and they were eager to gossip about it, pointing the finger undoubtedly at Samuel as somehow responsible for everything.

Samuel grumbled to himself as he reached for a pencil, which he often sketched with. A sheet of paper lay bare on his desk, and he began to draw.

As his mind began to wander back to Lady Lillian, his brow furrowed. Thinking of Lady Lillian was not ideal, since it seemed that she was practically betrothed to Lord Bertram. But Lady Lillian had been rather hesitant last evening, whenever Lord Bertram’s name was mentioned. It was as though she was not certain of the match, and Samuel found that realization filled him with relief. He was not certain why, but he did not wish Lady Lillian to marry Lord Bertram. He was not properly acquainted with Lord Bertram, although he did remember him from university. The man had not been quite as sturdy back then as he was now - the years had been kind to him, physically, and in the fact that he had inherited his father’s fortune and was doing well for himself.

Samuel certainly did not have a problem with him, but he could not help but feel envious of him. As he had come to know Lady Lillian, he had realized that, despite his vow to himself not to marry, at least not in anything like the near future, he was unable to stop himself from thinking of Lady Lillian.

As a matter of fact, he had to admit to himself that he had begun developing feelings for the lovely and lively golden-haired woman who lifted his spirits and offered her assistance to restore his reputation.

As he lowered his gaze, he was surprised by the sketch on the page in front of him. He had been so deep in thought that he had not paid any attention to what he was sketching. Yet, a perfect sketch of Lady Lillian’s beautiful face graced the page in front of him. It was easy to sketch her from memory, as every line and every tiny feature of her face was etched in his mind. An unforgettable vision of beauty that called out to him, and that he was unable to ignore.

Samuel stared at the sketch, feeling rather unsettled that Lady Lillian’s face was the first thing he had sketched in a very long while. She must have made a much bigger impact on him than he had initially thought. After all, she had willingly spent time with him at the ball, even if it was at the risk of ruining her family and her reputation. Not only was she painfully beautiful, but she was also selfless in that regard.

Samuel reached for the silver bell on his desk and rang it, its shrill sound piercing through the silence.

Within a short while, his butler entered the study and quietly approached the desk.

“Your Grace.”

“Have you ever been in love, Billings?”

“I cannot say that I have, Your Grace. Love is a fickle thing.”

“Indeed,” Samuel agreed and leaned back in his leather-bound chair. “Count yourself lucky that you have not. It is a type of pain which I do not recommend to anyone.”

“Is Your Grace well?” Billings’s brow furrowed, and Samuel shook his head.

“Oh, do not mind me. I am merely thinking aloud. Call for my carriage. I wish to visit Lord Timothy Colborne at Welsford House.”

“Right away, Your Grace,” Billings nodded and swiftly left the study.

Within fifteen minutes, his carriage was ready, and, as he settled into the seat, he patted his coat pocket, where the sketch of Lady Lillian was folded and tucked away, his heart pounding in his chest. Perhaps he could gift it to her, as he was certain that she would appreciate it much more than an expensive brooch.

Once the carriage came to a stop in front of Welsford House, Samuel stepped down and approached the door. He knocked, and he was met by the family’s butler a few moments later.

“Good morning. I am here to see Lord Timothy.”

“Certainly, Your Grace.”

The butler allowed Samuel entry and escorted him to the parlor, where he was to wait for Lord Timothy to be informed of his presence. He paced around the parlor and hoped very much to see Lady Lillian, for he could not call directly on her – not without revealing his interest to all – and he wasn’t sure that he wished to do that....

“Yarmouth, what a pleasant surprise.”

Samuel turned on his heel and smiled as his friend entered the room.

“Colborne,” he nodded. “My sincerest apologies if I am keeping you from something.”

“Nonsense. I was enjoying the peace and quiet this morning. My mother and sister are visiting a friend of my mother’s. The unfortunate woman is rather ill.”

“I am sorry to hear that.”

Samuel was disappointed that Lady Lillian was not at home, but considered it to be, perhaps, a good thing since Lady Welsford was not there either. It had seemed as though Lady Welsford was keeping a close eye on Lady Lillian so as not to risk sullying the Colborne name – and that meant that Lady Welsford was unlikely to have allowed him to see Lady Lillian anyway, had she been present.

“Come, sit. Can I offer you a drink?”

“No, thank you. I am fine.”

“Very well,” Lord Timothy nodded as the two gentlemen sat on the chairs beside the fireplace. “To what do I owe the pleasure of this visit?”

“I wished to speak to you after last night. I felt that the atmosphere was rather tense after your mother took your sister out of the room to speak privately. What was said I cannot know, but it would not be difficult to guess.”

“It was quite a shock for my mother to see you and Lillian engaged in such a spirited dance. And the fact that Lillian was enjoying herself immensely was also what angered my mother,” Lord Timothy stated.

“Does your mother not wish for your sister to enjoy herself?”

Lord Timothy shook his head.

“It was not that she enjoyed herself, Yarmouth, but rather who she enjoyed herself with.”

“I see. Your mother truly despises me, it seems.”

“Can you blame her? Your name has been sullied to such a degree that no one would speak to you nor even look in your general direction. It was as though you were a leper,” Lord Timothy pointed out.

“It is not a very comforting thing to hear, Colborne, but I do understand where you are coming from,” Samuel sighed. “Is your sister well after your mother confronted her?”

“She was rather quiet at breakfast, which is understandable. She did not speak much, nor did she eat anything substantial.”

Samuel lowered his gaze and was filled with guilt.

“I did not mean to cause her any trouble, believe me.”

“There is no need for that, Yarmouth. My sister knew what was right, and she knew how my mother felt about her being in your presence. She brought it on herself.”

“How can you be so cruel, Colborne? She is your sister. Are you not meant to protect her?” Samuel asked.

Lord Timothy narrowed his eyes at Samuel, staring at him suspiciously.

“Your furtive glances are not necessary,” Samuel pointed out.

“Your concern for my sister grows each time we speak, Yarmouth. Why is that?”

Samuel shifted in his seat and cleared his throat.

“Perhaps I shall accept the offer of that drink after all.”

Lord Timothy chuckled and rose to his feet. He poured two glasses of brandy from the decanter and handed one to Samuel as he sat again.

Samuel had much on his mind and quite a few things to further discuss with Lord Timothy. One of those matters was Lord Bertram, but Samuel was not certain how to approach the matter. He did not want to appear too direct, at the risk of seeming too interested in the man. Despite the unsettling feelings he had whenever Lord Bertram’s name was brought up, Samuel had yet to make up his own mind about him.

“In all honesty, why the brooding expression, Yarmouth? I have known you to be a pensive man, but you have brought it to an entirely new level of late,” Lord Timothy uttered, and his voice pulled Samuel back to the present moment.

“I wish to know something.”

“Anything,” Lord Timothy nodded and sipped his drink.

“Lord Bertram.”

Lord Timothy’s jaw clenched, and he averted his gaze.

“Why do you insist on speaking of him? It seems as though his name is the only name I hear. My mother speaks of him constantly, especially the gift which he has given my sister. I am certain that you have noticed the emerald brooch that she has become fond of.”

“I noticed it at Lady Montague’s ball,” Samuel answered wryly. “It is a rather lavish gift. Is your sister betrothed to Lord Bertram?”

Lord Timothy choked on his drink, and his brow furrowed even deeper than before.

“Why on earth would you ask that?”

“Out of sheer curiosity, and… because generally a man only gives such gifts to a woman he is betrothed to.” Samuel stated nonchalantly.

Lord Timothy’s brow furrowed.

“As far as I am aware, nothing is official. But he has called upon her more than once.”

“But they are not courting, are they?”

“Why?” Lord Timothy asked and cocked his head. “Are you interested?”

Samuel hesitated for a moment and looked at Lord Timothy.

“Do not be absurd. Why on earth would I be interested in Lady Lillian?”

“The two of you do get along well. She offered to help you restore your reputation, and you shared a rather lively dance at the ball.”

“That does not mean that I am interested.”

“Others have been interested with less interaction.”

Samuel pursed his lips and hesitated for longer than was needed, further raising Lord Timothy’s suspicions of his interest in Lillian.

“You are interested in my sister,” Lord Timothy stifled a laugh, but, when Samuel did not laugh with him, realized that Samuel was serious.

Samuel sipped his brandy and drew in a deep breath.

“I realize that it may be unacceptable to you since we have been friends for so long, but I enjoy her company, and I know that she enjoys mine.”

“Have you asked her that?” Lord Timothy asked.

Samuel shook his head.

“Contrary to what you might think of me, I do not possess the confidence to charm a young lady with flowery words and a dashing smile.”

“But let us be honest, you have a rather dashing smile. What of all those ladies who swooned as they strolled past us in Oxford?”

“That was more of a fascination.”

“And what you feel for Lillian is, what, love?” Lord Timothy inquired, with widened eyes.

“Nothing of the sort. As I mentioned, I enjoy her company, and I find her fascinating. She approached me at the ball without any regard for her reputation. It did not bother her in the least that guests were whispering when they saw us together.”

“I see.”

“But please do not speak of this. Not to anyone.”

“Are you ashamed of your feelings, Yarmouth?”

“Please, do not mock me. I am merely thinking of your sister. If word of this spread through Town, it would cause irreparable damage to her reputation, and not even Lord Bertram would want to marry her.”

“Which works out well for you. You could then marry her, Yarmouth,” Lord Timothy winked with amusement and sipped his drink.

Samuel shook his head in disapproval and turned his gaze elsewhere. It was an intriguing thought, but he would never consider it. Lady Welsford would never allow that to happen, and if anyone jeopardized her family’s good name, she would certainly unleash her wrath.

“I would never do such a thing. I hold her in very high regard, Colborne. And all of your family, for that matter.”

Lord Timothy leaned back in his chair and studied Samuel for a while.

“What will you do regarding the writer of the rumors?”

“I am not certain, but I must do something. Those rumors are affecting my life, and I must put an end to it.”

Samuel was suddenly reminded of the letter he had received upon his return to his townhouse and wondered where it was – he had put it aside, but he had been so annoyed by it at the time that he could not, now, remember where he had placed it. He recalled the very distinctive penmanship of the letter, but he did not have an inkling as to who had written it.

One thing was for certain: Samuel had to find that letter.