Chapter 13

CHAPTER 13

Trey

"O kay, everyone," I call out, my voice carrying across the arena. "Let's pick up a canter." I critically watch the group of five riders command their horses to enter into the loping gait, noticing a mistake off the bat. "Carrie… you're on the wrong lead. Try again."

The sun beats down, but the weather is too pretty to coop them up in the indoor arena. This is an adult group lesson and my last of the day. They ride in a large circle around me, their faces a mix of concentration and enjoyment.

After they make two full circles, I call out, "Okay… down to a trot." Carrie's on the wrong lead again. "Sit one, Carrie."

She takes an extra bounce in her seat, putting her back on the correct lead. "Great job. Now look down… memorize what it looks like."

Her head bows for a second, studying her horse's shoulder and then back up again with uncertainty. "You'll get it," I assure her as she trots by. "Takes practice."

Carrie nods, her face scrunched up with concentration.

The sound of an approaching car on gravel gets my attention and I turn to see a silver sedan pulling into the small lot between the lesson barn and arena. My pulse skitters as I recognize Holland's rental.

"Everyone drop your stirrups," I say, my eyes cutting back and forth between the riders and the beautiful blond. Fuck she looks good… wearing a pair of riding jods, a new pair of boots she must have picked up at Freedman's and a helmet in her hand.

That's a sign of permanence in my opinion. For a woman who was intent on heading back to Zurich, she just dropped some money to be able to do a little casual riding.

I grin as she waves at me, heading to the arena fence. Luckily, the lesson is almost over so I instruct the riders to pick up their stirrups and two-point. I cross a break in traffic and meet Holland at the fence.

Her easy smile speaks to the way things have changed in a few short days. Yesterday, she accepted my invitation to take a quick Sunday morning trip to the Cincinnati Zoo where we spent a few amazing hours, walking around hand in hand. It was like we were young lovers all over again, sneaking off to a place where we'd have anonymity. Conversation flowed and there was tenuous talk of future plans. That evening, she came over and had Sunday dinner with our family before Abby headed back to Pittsburgh and it felt like old times.

"What are you doing here?" I ask, a grin spreading across my face.

She holds out her arms, showcasing her attire. "I thought I'd ride, if that's okay."

"Of course it's okay," I reply, trying to keep my tone casual as she comes right to the fence and leans an arm on it. "Need a lesson?"

Her smile turns mischievous, her voice dropping to a husky whisper, "Only if you're giving it."

My heart skips a beat and it's a marvel how deeply this creature affects me, but I maintain my composure. "Go get Sampson ready. He's in stall eight. I'll be in shortly."

Holland winks and heads off to the barn. I watch her go, my eyes pinned to her ass.

"Got your eye on someone special?" one of my riders asks as he trots by.

"Mind your own business," I mutter, but I can't help but smile.

I finish the lesson by calling everyone into a line-up. I hand out final tips before they dismount and lead their horses back to the barn. I follow along, heading toward Sampson's stall, which is on the back side.

As I come around the corner, I hear Wade and Holland talking. Wade's voice is light and playful, and Holland's laughter rings out in response. I slow my steps, curiosity getting the better of me.

"So, what's a girl like you doing in a place like this?" Wade teases, leaning against the stall door as Holland adjusts the saddle on her horse.

She chuckles, rolling her eyes. "What, this old place? Just slumming it, you know."

Wade grins. "No girl as pretty as you could be slumming it."

Holland laughs again, shaking her head. "You're quite the charmer, Wade Blackburn."

"Oh, you have no idea," he says in a deepened voice, eyebrows waggling.

"I call bullshit," Holland says, and I make myself known.

"That's because Wade's the king of bullshit," I quip, giving him a light punch on the arm.

"How'd your lesson go?" he asks, both of us stepping back as Holland leads a fully tacked Sampson from his stall.

"No one fell off," I deadpan.

"That's a win." Wade laughs, then nods to Holland. "You going to give this one some pointers?"

"Well, you know," I say, shooting Holland a wink. "She's probably a little rusty."

"I mean… those shiny new boots she has on," Wade plays along, glancing down at her feet. "Total novice."

"Har har har," Holland says dryly.

"Okay, let's get this done." I clap my hands and rub them together with a mock evil laugh.

"I'm getting ready to head out," Wade says, throwing his thumb over his shoulder. "Got a minute, Trey?"

"Yeah, sure," I say, looking back to Holland. "Go ahead into the arena and walk a few turns. Be right out."

When Holland is gone, I turn to Wade and ask, "You all hitched up?"

Wade's heading to West Virginia to pick up a new stud horse Ethan purchased. "Yeah… all good."

"What did you want to talk about?" I ask, feeling a little anxious to get out there with Holland because well, all I want is to be in her presence.

Wade takes his hat off his head, scrubs his fingers through his black hair. "I need to talk to you about Holland."

I blink in surprise and my stomach drops, because his tone sets me on edge. "What about?"

His eyes dart off to the side, then back to me. "Well… um… I'm thinking about asking Holland out on a date." I stare at him slack-jawed, unable to believe I'm hearing this. He looks embarrassed, unsure of himself. "I wanted to know what you thought. You're my best friend, bro, and I implicitly trust your advice."

I feel a surge of panic but try to hide it. "What brought this on?"

"Just happy to have her back, I guess." Wade rubs his neck, his sheepish expression deepening. "We had so much fun Saturday, and she's single. I'm single. Figured it couldn't hurt to ask her out."

It could fucking destroy everything.

I probe gently. "Do you have feelings for her again?"

Wade shrugs, looking uncertain. "I don't know. Maybe. I just can't help but wonder what would have happened if she hadn't left all those years ago. I never even got the chance to tell her how I felt back then, and well… maybe her being back is a sign that I should take a chance."

No, no, no. Her being back is my sign that we're supposed to be together.

I'm perilously close to losing my shit. My mind races, history repeating itself. I can't let this get away from me again.

I keep my voice steady. "Wade, she's been through a lot lately. She's planning to go back to Zurich. Maybe now's not the best time."

"But maybe she won't go back. You heard her." He's referencing our camping trip when, after we were several beers into the night, she hypothesized what it would be like to return to Shelbyville permanently. While it was mostly a buzz talking, I can't deny I didn't latch onto the hope that she was serious.

But I can't let him think that. I can't let him have hope the way I did the last time. I have to protect my interests, so I take a really cheap shot. "If you want my honest take, I don't think it's a good idea. Holland's like a sister to us, and I don't think she'll ever see you as more than a brother."

"Really?" he asks, looking a little crestfallen, but my comments hit the mark, because I can see the doubt settle in and take root.

I nod. "I think the excitement of her coming home might be confusing things, but little bro… I don't see that going anywhere."

He looks thoughtful, then nods. "You're right. Probably a bad idea. I don't know what I was thinking."

Thinking the same thing I'm thinking… that Holland is amazing and so very easy to love.

"Definitely a bad idea. Besides, you're the one who doesn't want to settle down."

"You're right," he says, this time sounding sure of himself. "Stupid idea. Thanks for being my sounding board."

Relief floods through me, but guilt follows closely behind. "Anytime. Have a safe trip, okay?"

Wade claps me on the shoulder. "Always. I'll see you tomorrow afternoon."

I watch him go, my mind spinning. While I have him talked out of any silly aspirations that he could have something with my woman, I'm still a little disturbed over the whole thing. It dredges up all the horrible memories of how I lost Holland the first time because my little brother got all up in his feelings and I didn't want to hurt him. God, I hope this was just a whim for him and he wasn't serious, because I know this time around, I'm not about to step aside.

I head out of the barn and find Holland walking around in a two-point. I scale the fence rather than take the gate and walk directly toward her. I don't know what she sees on my face, but she brings her horse to a halt, lowering back down into the saddle.

"What's wrong?" she asks as I reach her.

"Wade just told me he was thinking about asking you out."

"What?" she exclaims so loudly, her horse skitters sideways before she brings him to a halt.

I nod at her, grim-faced and perturbed.

"What did you say?" she asks hesitantly.

"I discouraged him," I admit. "Told him it was a bad idea, that you were like a little sister and that you would probably only ever look at him like a brother."

"That's accurate," she says, but I can see her bracing for bad news. Holland has been transported back in time, same as me, and she's expecting me to drop the other shoe.

"I dissuaded him because I'm not about to move aside," I say sternly, my hand gripping her ankle and squeezing for reassurance. "You're mine and he's not getting in the way of that."

Holland exhales in relief and I hate that she even doubted me. "But I need to tell him the truth about us. The only reason I didn't do it just now is he's on his way to West Virginia and it's not the time to get into it. I'll sit down with him tomorrow and tell him everything."

Holland nods, her expression serious. "I agree. We need to be honest with him."

I take a deep breath, feeling the gravity of her agreement. That means she thinks there's something that needs to be divulged. It's not only being truthful about the past, it's being honest about what we potentially have right now. "Do you want to be there when I talk to him?"

She hesitates, then nods. "I think I should, but what exactly are we going to say?"

"I'm going to tell him I was in love with you eleven years ago and I made a stupid decision to let you go because I couldn't hurt him. But that I can't do it again."

"And where do I stand in all of this?" she asks, and I tilt my head at her because I'm not quite sure how to answer that. "I mean… all of this is moot if I'm going back to Zurich."

"That's true, but you said you felt you should be there to tell him. If you were going back to Zurich, you'd be advocating keeping this secret from him until you leave."

My heart slams against my breastbone because I dare hope that she's subtly making some sort of commitment, but her smile is freely given. "There's no secret. We need to tell him."

Air rushes from my lungs and I glance over my shoulder at students exiting the barn. "If there weren't people around, I'd drag you off that horse and kiss the daylights out of you."

Holland laughs. "I'd let you do it too."

I squeeze her ankle again before releasing it. I take several steps back, moving to the center of the arena. "Go ahead and trot," I say, slipping into instructor mode.

Holland's expression goes serious as she gathers her reins, lifts Sampson's head and gives him a soft command. "Trot."

She expertly goes up into the correct lead, hands up, heels down, ass in the back of the saddle. It's like she never left.

After she goes by on the second turn, a thought strikes me. "Hey," I call out.

Her head turns my way.

"Want to stay the night at my house? We can grill out some steaks."

"Okay," she says, a grin splitting her face. Then she goes back into work mode, putting all of her attention on the horse.

We spend the next hour working together in the arena, but my mind is on tomorrow. On the conversation we'll have with Wade. On the future I hope to build with Holland.