32. Halo

One second.

He had his hands on Ari. I should have killed him.

One second.

She was nearly taken. Lola was nearly taken from me.

One second.

Fuck. I can't say anything right now. He came near my girls. He was at the store, which couldn't have been a coincidence. He obviously knows Ari's routine or has someone watching the house, and the idea they've violated my sanctuary makes me want to vomit.

I try to bank the thoughts of finding them like I found Mercy, face down in a pool of their own blood.

One second.I need to hold on to the edge. These girls are mine. Ari's hand is cold as her fingers grip mine. It takes all I have to steer Saint's truck home. She's biting down the side of her thumb.

One second.

My house comes into view. Saint is behind me on my bike. I was so fucking scared for Ari that I didn't even trust my friend to drive her home.

"Are you mad?" Arianne asks. "I didn't know it was him."

Her voice is so fucking small, I want to rage into the car. But I can't. Not at her.

One. Fucking. Second.

I pull up onto the drive, take a breath, and scan my home. There are no new tire marks on the gravel, and I don't see signs of anyone being here. My security system would have alerted me to anyone attempting to break in or if any of my cameras had gone offline.

"I know. I'm not mad at you, kitten," I manage to grind out as I kill the engine. Once I felt like my life would be better if I were carefree, if Ari and Lola left to live somewhere else. Now, I can't imagine my house without them in it.

Arianne's palm touches my cheek. I hadn't even realized she'd taken her seat belt off.

My kitten looks at me with sad wide eyes.

"She's asleep," Arianne says, looking behind us at Lola in the car seat. "It's as if none of this has happened to her. She doesn't realize she's lost her parents. That she's caught up in something bad."

"By being here, it means you are caught up in it too. I hate my dad's choices created this for you both." I tuck a piece of hair behind her ear and let my knuckles graze her cheek. "If any of my brothers had asked me two months ago what the one thing I wanted was, I'd probably make some joke about a cold beer and some pussy. But the truth is, when I walked up that grocery aisle and saw you in trouble, my first thought was for your safety. And my next thought was that I was going to kill every single man who'd put his hands on you. Let's get inside."

Saint parks the bike and climbs off as we get out of the truck, and I get Lola out of her seat in the back. "I'm going to take a look outside. You doing okay, Ari?" he asks.

"I just want this to be over by any means necessary."

I give Lola to Ari and crowd them as they head towards the door. The property looks secure, but I'm still cautious as we step inside and I do a full search while Ari waits in the hall.

"Come sit with me while we wait for reinforcements," I say, taking Lola before leading her down to the finished basement. There are fewer windows and only one point of entry. It means for a hot second I can focus on her and make sure she's okay.

I lay Lola down on the rug, and Ari puts some toys in front of her in case she wakes up.

Do I check out Ari's ass? Of course.

Do I try not to think about her ass so much that my dick gets hard? Sure.

But I fail.

Because I just put myself on a path where Arianne becomes my old lady. And not even the thought of explaining what it means to her can reduce the chub growing in my jeans.

Not even knowing my brother is here.

Gently, I lift her and carry her to the sofa, my arms still around her middle. I sit down so she lands on my lap.

"I'm going to claim you as my old lady."

Ari grins. "I'm pretty sure now is not the right time to talk about this."

"King said he'd get Vex to give the property cameras a full check and alert me if there were issues. He hasn't, which tells me no one has fucked with the house. I'm going to claim you as my old lady. First, because I really fucking want to. I want the world to know you are mine. And I also want to claim you because it adds a layer of protection. Anything happens to me, the club takes care of you and Lola."

Tears spill over Ari's lashes. "I can't bear the thought of anything happening to you though." She leans back against the arm of the sofa, keeping her distance rather than getting comfortable as I hoped. "It feels like it might be better if I sit in a chair for this conversation."

"If that's really what you want, go sit in the chair. But I'd rather wrap you up in my arms tight and tell you that everything is going to be okay, regardless of how all this goes. You just need to ease back against me, and I'll do it."

Her whole body relaxes as she does exactly as I say. She molds herself against me while I wrap my arms tightly around her. Her shoulders drop from up by her ears; her body goes soft instead of rigid.

I further tighten my arms around her and bury my head in her hair. She smells like my shampoo, and yeah, boner again. There's a perfection to how she feels against my body, and I allow myself to ease too.

"I have a theory, Ari."

"What's that?"

"You thrive when you feel taken care of. You enjoy sex more when you respond to pain-free and gentle domination. And you love taking care of others."

She smiles at me. "I think that's true."

I kiss her lips gently. "You're a submissive through and through. You're not career-driven either, you want a simple life. To stay at home, take care of your family, and submit to the right man. But what you got was a douche-canoe of an ex. He's not a dominant man, and that pisses him off because he feels like he has no control of his own life. So, he took all that out on you. And somewhere along the way, he took your incredible sweet and submissive nature and made you his punching bag. And now you confuse things. Wanting to lean into being my submissive, but also not wanting to be what you were with him."

Little lines appear across the bridge of her nose as she thinks. "When you say it like that, it's kinda obvious Patrick and I were never going to work."

"Our life is going to be the opposite. I need you to know that from today on, you're mine, you're here, and I'm going to look after you and Lola. We're a family, not a contract. I'm old-fashioned, in that I want a woman who can find peace in being a mother and a wife. Someone who finds contentment in building a home. You can get a job if you really want one, but I'd love it if you stayed home and cared for our family while I earn enough to look after us. I'm still getting you the house and will put money aside for you each month so you can build your own nest egg. You need to know you have money and options of your own. But I need to know if a life like that is something you want long term."

Arianne looks up at me. "That feels like relief. But don't you mind that I can't have children?"

There's so much grief in her eyes for a second that I have to kiss her lips. They're soft and welcoming. It would be too easy to get lost in them, so I force myself to pull away. "Your value to me is utterly unrelated to your ability to have kids. But to answer your question, I never really wanted kids. Then came Lola. The little miracle I never expected to have to care for. I'll be happy enough with just the one, unless you really want more through adoption or surrogacy or something. We can afford tests and IVF and shit, if that's what you want to do too."

"Can I think about that?" she asks.

"Of course. It's not a one-time offer. Although, I don't relish the idea running after a baby at fifty."

"I'd sort of resigned myself to not having biological children after three years of trying. It took a lot of work to get there. I don't know if I want to open the door to hope again. Lola is related to me by blood. It's more than I could ever ask for and as special as it gets. Plus, she's going to have demons as she grows up, dealing with what happened to her parents and who she is. I like the idea we could give her our full attention."

I can imagine it. A young girl in her early teens needing help from us to navigate her life as she understands more about her history.

"You agree with everything else?" I ask.

Arianne places her palm on my chest. "With a couple of additions."

"I'm all ears."

She glances up at the window. "Now?"

"No better time for it."

"I want to feel safe in my home, while I sleep, where I live. I want the peace that comes from not living on adrenaline or with hyper vigilance. I want a life where I don't have to read between lines or second guess what you're thinking."

"I promise you no harm will ever come to you in our home. You can use your safe word out of the bedroom, anywhere you need to, if you ever feel scared. Even if it's the clubhouse, with friends. You text me glass, I'll come get you, wherever you are. From today forward, you'll never have to guess what I'm thinking. You ask me what I'm thinking, I'll tell you. And I'll try to over-communicate with you. With that comes acceptance on your part that I'm going to want to take care of you in a way that might feel overbearing, and you need to tell me if it's too much. But I need you to trust me that I'll always have your best interests at heart."

"Will you be faithful?"

"Once upon a time, I thought that might be hard to answer, but it's not. Yes, I'll be faithful. I look forward to exploring your sexual limits more thoroughly, kitten."

Arianne sighs and studies me. "If I told you I loved you, would you freak out?"

"Would it freak you out if I told you I loved you?"

Her face brightens at that. "You do? This has all happened so quickly."

"So what if it's fast? We're a patchwork. Lola isn't ours biologically, but she is in every way that matters. We have a child who's my half-sister and your niece. What does it matter if we commit to giving her a good life and building an incredible one for ourselves? We have a solid foundation of already loving each other and being able to give each other what we need."

"Is it just lust though?" she asks.

I shake my head. "You think I don't know my own mind?"

"But you were so reluctant at first."

I shrug, interlinking our fingers. "Maybe that should be proof enough that I mean it now. I need you, Ari. I need you in my life and home. I need you to love me and build a home for me and Lola. I promise I'll make it a safe one."

"Yes, then. I want to do all of that with you."

My heart races in my chest. What I'm about to say will change the shape and structure of our lives forever. I'm saying it without a club vote because nothing will change my mind. "Then will you be my old lady, Ari? I promise I'll love you and Lola and give us the best fucking life I can."

"I'd be honored."

I'm about to kiss her when Arianne bites down on her lower lip and glances over to the fireplace. I catch the pinky-peach blush to her cheeks and the way her thighs rub together as she does.

"What's that about?" I ask.

"What?" she asks, but her voice cracks.

"I know a turned-on woman when I see one. I just don't know what did it for you."

She gives me side eye. "You know no such thing," she says.

With a quick tussle, I manage to rearrange us so she's kneeling across my thighs, my hands palming her ass.

"Jax," she squeals as she braces her palms on my shoulders.

I kiss her with feeling. She's mine in every way that matters for the rest of our lives.

"What turned you on?" I say, tugging her over my cock. My chub, liking the pressure, springs to a full-blown boner in record time.

Arianne braces her forehead to my shoulder. "You were talking about needs," she says, her voice muffled against my cut.

The rumble of laughter is unexpected. I've always been with women who are happy to tell me to fuck their ass or that they want fisting. But I now live with a woman who loses her shit over saying the word need.

I slide a hand into her hair, holding her to me. Playful intimacy is as fulfilling as fucking. "What about needs?"

"Can we talk about what's going to happen when your motorcycle club gets here?" The words are still mumbled against my chest, but I stroke her back softly.

"Nope. I need to know your thoughts on needs. You got some I'm not meeting?" I grin as I lean my head back on the sofa.

She sits up at this. "You're so much more…" She waves her hand at me like that's the only explanation I need.

"What does"—I mimic her gesture—"this mean?"

Her cheeks burn now. "You know what I mean. You're so proficient. At sex and dirty talking and the whole dominant thing. It's intimidating and yet?—"

The roar of bikes and the sound of gravel crunching cuts her off. King was at the clubhouse when I called, and he agreed to round up backup so we could build a plan.

I kiss her gently. "This conversation is to be continued. When we're safe. I'm going to go talk to my brothers. Technically you being my old lady needs to pass a club vote. It's just a formality. You stay down here with Lola until we know what's going on."

"Someone made all the decisions for me once before. I don't think I'm that person anymore," Ari says, climbing off my lap.

"I know, kitten. But this is also club business."

"Well." She picks Lola up off the rug. "Now I'm making it my business too."

I don't have the heart to tell her she can't. Because I like the way she feels safe enough with me to argue. She's come a long way from the girl who smashed the glass in the kitchen in fear.

I follow her up the stairs, then go to the door and let King in. He's there with Bates and Switch.

"Where's everyone else?" I ask. "I wanted a vote on something."

"In pairs, circling out from the grocery store," King says as he walks by me. "The store manager is a friend of the club. He's agreed to give us store and lot footage, to see if Vex can't get a lead on your brother. Vote'll have to wait."

I swallow my frustration. "Then let me get packed up to get Lola and Ari to the clubhouse. They'll be safer there, and then I can join you."

Bates pats my shoulder hard. "You aren't joining us."

"What?"

"It's for the best," Switch says as they head into the kitchen.

"What the fuck do you mean I'm not joining you? He's my brother. You need me to?—"

"Listen." King pulls a set of keys out of his cut. "First off, the other Iron Outlaw clubs have been told to converge at the Brotherhood HQ and burn the fuckers to the ground. There will be timed assaults on homes, buildings, and businesses. No one will survive tonight. And second, these are the keys to my dad's old cabin. Rae and I renovated it, so it's better than the shithole you might remember. You're going to go up there with Switch and Bates. You're going in Switch's truck. Leave yours here. Switch will take one of your secondary bikes to follow you. We're going to leave this place looking like it's lived in."

"I'm not going to run away from a fight. Never have in my life. Won't start now."

King leans forward. "I've looked up to you as an older brother my whole life. Never been prouder of anyone than when you enlisted. Prouder still when you earned those medals doing shit a man shouldn't have to do. I'm not asking you to run away from a fight. I'm asking you to trust us enough to fight for you. Because I'm guessing that vote you wanted is sitting right over there."

I turn and see Ari holding Lola, who has her head in the crook of her neck. When I turn back, I lower my voice. "I wanted to vote her as my old lady."

King grins. "How the mighty has fallen. I seem to recall you winding Spark up over his pick of women."

"Asshole," I mutter. But there is no malice in it. I know he's right.

"Take them. Keep them safe. If anything happens, I'll propose the vote and Bates and Switch can witness it. It will pass. Whatever happens, the club will take care of the two of them."

And I nod. It will make what I need to do easier. One less thing to worry about.

Because my brother wants me to face him.

I have a suspicion that no matter what King and my Outlaw brothers plan, he will keep coming for me until we're in a showdown only one of us can win.

And that's what I intend to do.