12. Chapter 12
12
Chapter 12
T hat evening, Dahlia sat chopping some vegetables from Ilex's little garden. Fluffy's bones clicked together as he rubbed against her legs while she worked. She was glad Ilex had accepted her rather transparent reason for staying a little longer. Of course, she did want to make sure they were alright after being so ill, but in truth, they seemed fine now. Really, she just didn't want to go.
She had been so excited to make her way to Ichorna, but now that she was in this charming place in these lush green woods so full of life, she did not want to go. She wanted to get to know Ilex better and just…be. Her life in Daosbor's court was a constant barrage of people's expectations and lectures on how she was failing to meet them for reasons both within and outside of her control. She found the quiet joy of nature and the company of someone who wanted her around healing in a way she hadn't known she needed.
She could sit and try to reason through it and come up with excuses all day, but really, it was simple—she just wanted to be here.
Ilex ducked through the door of the cottage then, carrying a basket full of ripe berries. They bent to place the basket on the table, and Dahlia couldn't help but stare at the long planes of their muscled body. Even though it was so plant-like in some ways, it wasn't that different from a human. She wondered what the softer parts of their skin might feel like beneath her fingertips—what their hands might feel like on her.
Ilex finally turned and caught her staring. She realized her cheeks must be bright pink; she felt suddenly very warm. The heat in Ilex's own gaze wasn't helping the situation one bit.
They didn't speak, just observed her where she sat. She couldn't take the silence and her embarrassment at once, and before she could stop herself, the words were out of her mouth.
"When was the last time anyone touched you, Ilex?"
The silence fell again, and Dahlia thought she may simply implode. How could she have asked them such a horribly blunt question? She wanted to look around for a hole to crawl into.
"It has been," Ilex began, their rich alto voice filling the small space and sinking into Dahlia's bones, "a very long time."
She ignored her embarrassment long enough then to consider their words. The two of them—alone here in Ilex's cottage in the woods—were on a precipice. She could feel it in the pit of her stomach. Whatever she said next would decide their course. Being out in the world beyond Daosbor made her eager to experience everything she wanted, and she wanted Ilex. She felt confident and maybe a little reckless.
"I think you would be very nice to touch, Ilex, and I…" she trailed off, gathering every ounce of boldness she possessed. "I would like to, I think, if you will let me. Touch you, that is." Her breathing was shallow, and she could feel her heart working overtime in her chest. She fought to keep herself from looking away from Ilex, refusing to be sorry for her openness.
"You want to touch me, little songbird?" Dahlia saw a slight dark green tint rise over Ilex's high cheekbones. They moved toward her then, kneeling next to the bench where she sat. Fluffy scampered out the door of the cottage, sensing that he should make himself scarce.
Ilex was so close to her, and they smelled of springtime—fresh green leaves and an herbal undertone of rosemary. Their moss-green eyes assessed her, now at the same height, and their beauty took Dahlia's breath away.
"You may touch me, Dahlia," Ilex breathed. She nodded, in a trance, and reached her hand out toward their ethereal face.
Her fingertips traced over the planes of their face, and it was so soft under her touch. She cupped their jaw in her hand and ran her thumb over their plump lower lip. Ilex sucked in a breath at the touch. Their eyes locked.
"May I touch you too?" Ilex's voice was barely more than a whisper. Dahlia nodded. "I need you to say yes, songbird," Ilex encouraged her.
"Yes, Ilex, I want you to touch me too."
One of their willowy hands slipped around her waist then, and the sensation of their warmth sent a thrill through her. She moved her own hand from where it was still cupping their jaw and trailed her fingers down their neck. Ilex tilted their head to the side to allow her more access, and they let out a soft gasp as she grazed a sensitive spot at the base of their neck.
Ilex looked at her again then, their hand tightening where it rested on her waist, and they kept eye contact as they slid their palm up to cup her breast. Dahlia sucked in a breath; she had been touched before, but it had never felt so reverent as this. She had not been sure if Ilex shared her experience of sexual desire, but she felt confident now that there must be at least something similar.
She wanted to encourage them, wanted to feel their touch everywhere. She wanted them, whatever that might mean.
"Ilex, would you kiss me?"
Before she could second guess herself, Ilex leaned in, cupped her face, and pressed their lips to hers. The contact was unlike anything she had felt before; it felt like life itself, touching Ilex like this—and she wanted more.